Few things can make a man proud enough to touch him deep inside and stretch so far to reach his own ego. And this is what happened to me today. This is an important milestone for me. I recently found out my penis is longer. But before going more into details I feel it's obligatory to give a brief history about my penis.
Like many guys, I've been sexually active since I'm 12. I am not actually sure I was supposed to start at that age since I basically tried fapping very often until it worked for a few months. But I always wanted to grow up and nurture a big boy I could be proud of. That was one of the things I was looking forward the most. Unfortunately as I went through my puberty and teen years I found out that was not the case. Being completely honest I was very disappointed with my penis. He would refuse to grow as I wanted and as I kept watching videos of well grown men having their way with beautiful girls I started developing a dense state of sadness. I kept checking if there was any improvement over and over and I would soon realize that growing up to that level was nothing short of a sweet dream. My penis was not giving me any joy. When I was 18 I measured it for the last time and I realized I had to deal with it. It was barely average and if I stared at him I swear it looked pretty sad. And since I basically regard my penis as one of my closest friends, that made me even more sad. We shared so many great moments together, why couldn't we both be happy?
I stopped thinking about it too much and tried to be content with what I had. I knew something was missing in my life but I thought I had no way to get it.
Two months ago I had a big change in my life. If you don't know what I'm talking about you might want to check my previous blog. As I went through some books of fitness I found in a very special one the notion that you could make your own male attribute bigger and stronger. I was skeptical at first but that didn't stop me from trying. I was still dreaming after all, and I tried really hard every day hoping for the best. First comes power. I started power lifting light clothing and towels up and down. It was hard in the beginning but after a while I could manage heavier towels. I am not exactly sure what this is for but I was like "fuck it, let's try it anyway, can't possibly hurt". Well I was wrong since my penis got swollen several times and I swear it hurts like shit. That still didn't refrain me from keeping doing it though. Then the most important part is supposed to be stretching. I did read about two different key stretching exercises and I keep doing both of them religiously every two days. Again, I'm not sure if this would work at all, but the same mentality as above applies here. The bruises might actually come from this. Who knows. This kind of training has a very Rocky feeling to it. It's consuming time and energy and there's no way to be sure to be able to reach your goals. All you have to do is try and believe in yourself.
After all this effort, commitment and excitement I sure was scared to check if there was any improvement, but eventually the moment had to come. A couple days ago I decided it was time to see if this brought forth any result. I didn't want to do it with my old ruler from high school so I went and bought a new one for the occasion. I was very nervous but eventually I managed to get my old pal in its best shape. I put the brand new ruler on the side, ready for a big delusion. Right before checking I was already thinking that there was no point in hoping for a change, but I was conscious that deep inside all I wanted was to be surprised. That was the moment when all this reached its climax. All my expectations would either be destroyed or renewed in a split second. I gave a quick look with fake indifference, and a smile came to my face. My penis was longer. By about 15% the previous time I checked its lenght.
I believe there's no need to describe the feelings that came afterwards as most people here are guys. You know how fucking awesome it feels.
Yet I still don't know if this is the result of my intense training, a wrong measurement back then or just the fact my penis couldn't have been fully grown last time I checked. I guess I will still keep training every day and see where this leads in a couple more months
On December 17 2012 08:22 B.I.G. wrote: TMI, dont really understand why I kept reading but I suppose I was hoping you were telling this to make something of a point..
aheem, Wut da fuck??? Maybe it´s something like a girls-thing but I really don´t wanna know anything about your Penis ... Thought there would be some kind of a conclusion at the end, but ...
At first the only thing I could think of was "do you even lift?" but then I just proceeded to read everything in Stallone's voice after you mentioned Rocky and it was quite entertaining. This was unexpectedly awesome lol.
holy shit what did i just read....i thought this was something about the attitude of people on the internet,in sc2 or something like that cause i saw the name atn cloud and i would have never expected somebody to write about something like this on TL ..... oh god....
On December 17 2012 08:55 EtherealDeath wrote: You're not a man until you lift 70 pounds of weights with your penis.
In the court of whichever Chinese nobleman was the sponsor of Lu Buwei (I forget), there was a courtier whose claim to fame was the ability to carry around a wagon wheel on his erection. no joke. That was the entire reason he was there
Another thing, for developing stamina, endurance, and strength, is to buy a heavy bag, and then spar with it with your penis. If you do this every day, you'll see definite improvement, even as soon as a few weeks! Just remember to wrap your penis beforehand, so that you don't bruise it or develop calluses. + Show Spoiler +
Unless you want to, that's ok too, I guess...
A speed bag also helps, because it lets you practice your thrusting motions, but also increases your dexterity and accuracy. So, while this might not make your penis bigger, it will make you a much better love maker.
On December 17 2012 09:03 Mr. Wiggles wrote: Another thing, for developing stamina, endurance, and strength, is to buy a heavy bag, and then spar with it with your penis. If you do this every day, you'll see definite improvement, even as soon as a few weeks! Just remember to wrap your penis beforehand, so that you don't bruise it or develop calluses. + Show Spoiler +
Unless you want to, that's ok too, I guess...
A speed bag also helps, because it lets you practice your thrusting motions, but also increases your dexterity and accuracy. So, while this might not make your penis bigger, it will make you a much better love maker.
Hahahhaha the best ever. Does anyone know if the penis thing actually works? Because, uh, my friend who wants a bigger penis was reading this over my shoulder...
This was not only awesome, I feel like we have to make a TL penis-enlargement fitness book called the ClouD method, "guranteed 15% increase i penis-ness!" Yep, that should be real.
Wow, amazing. I don't think I actually laughed out loud but I'm reading this at work and I just hope people don't ask me why I have a huge smirk on my face.
You never fail to disappoint with your blogs Cloud. As someone else in this thread said, please don't ever change.
I hope for the same success you had Cloud. I'm debating starting a video blog about it and posting them on the coL website so everyone can track status developments. Perhaps we should create a montage together and then we can feel the true status of a Rocky film, together.
This kind of training has a very Rocky feeling to it. It's consuming time and energy and there's no way to be sure to be able to reach your goals. All you have to do is try and believe in yourself.
On December 17 2012 09:03 Mr. Wiggles wrote: Another thing, for developing stamina, endurance, and strength, is to buy a heavy bag, and then spar with it with your penis. If you do this every day, you'll see definite improvement, even as soon as a few weeks! Just remember to wrap your penis beforehand, so that you don't bruise it or develop calluses. + Show Spoiler +
Unless you want to, that's ok too, I guess...
A speed bag also helps, because it lets you practice your thrusting motions, but also increases your dexterity and accuracy. So, while this might not make your penis bigger, it will make you a much better love maker.
The mental image this made me conjure was hilarous.
On December 17 2012 08:47 CabalMinion wrote: aheem, Wut da fuck??? Maybe it´s something like a girls-thing but I really don´t wanna know anything about your Penis ... Thought there would be some kind of a conclusion at the end, but ...
Excuse me, lady, but this is the men's locker room.
On December 17 2012 09:09 Boundz(DarKo) wrote: U rly think it stopped growing at 18? Whatever you did (tldr) it was waste of time as it would have grown anyway.
bro mine has been like 18 inches since i was 13... 25 now and it hasn't grown at all
On December 17 2012 08:22 B.I.G. wrote: TMI, dont really understand why I kept reading but I suppose I was hoping you were telling this to make something of a point..
Nice pun
Ironically his name is B.I.G.
congrats to you and your fancy new penis. May you share many more adventures together!
On December 21 2012 06:25 1Dhalism wrote: so what's the name of the book. I need it... for a friend.
Solitary Fitness by Charles Bronson. You are welcome.
Oh man, there's a book too? You should write an article for TL Knowhow. You even have a product in mind already! Let's take this blog to the next level!
Haha ClouD you literally made my day! I'm happy for you and ur penis and i'm serious! I never had the problem with a below average sized penis! And i'm happy and thankful for that! Mine is quite long and I would like it to be even bigger! But i'm happy for you Cloud and i know how important mens penises is for many! <3 ;] awesome blog btw haha
There is a scientifically proven (iirc, but it might be a hypothesis and study so correct me if I'm wrong) method to getting it bigger, but if you have stopped growing it won't work.
Basically the more testosterone you have the bigger it will be while you are going through puberty. There are natural ways to increase testosterone (like weightlifting and eating more food), or you could just take dianabol (not recommending this in any way).
On December 21 2012 16:15 HawaiianPig wrote: clever and pithy insight into the culturally induced penis-anxiety faced by males today
I just have one question, when weight lifting with your penis is many reps with lower weight for stamina, or more weight with less reps for size more important?
On December 21 2012 16:15 HawaiianPig wrote: clever and pithy insight into the culturally induced penis-anxiety faced by males today
I just have one question, when weight lifting with your penis is many reps with lower weight for stamina, or more weight with less reps for size more important?
Low reps for getting it cut and lean, high weight for more girth
Shouldnt you bring this shit to /B or some other sick forum? Well ill contribute some to your awesome thread that makes no sense. I started at age of 10 and my penis have been swollen too. Between age 12-15 I could fap and came around 13 times in a row and I dont recomend it its nice but the problem is that it gets swollen and you cant do it for several days. Its better not to overfap it. Instead fapping should be kept no more then 7-8 times in a row then your best friend need some rest.
In fact.. 3-5 times a day is problaby enough for most even at that age. Its so exhausting to be a disgusting little teen..
On December 17 2012 08:07 rabidch wrote: "i can lift this much, do you even lift?"
Do you even use your body's natural anatomical motion to move an external resistance through a predetermined range of motion in order to induce Seyle's adaptation syndrome throughout the muscular tissues, bones, ligaments, and tendons thereby resulting in a net increase in hypertrophy, power, strength, or endurance, bro?
On December 22 2012 09:31 IForgetMyUsername wrote: Shouldnt you bring this shit to /B or some other sick forum? Well ill contribute some to your awesome thread that makes no sense. I started at age of 10 and my penis have been swollen too. Between age 12-15 I could fap and came around 13 times in a row and I dont recomend it its nice but the problem is that it gets swollen and you cant do it for several days. Its better not to overfap it. Instead fapping should be kept no more then 7-8 times in a row then your best friend need some rest.
In fact.. 3-5 times a day is problaby enough for most even at that age. Its so exhausting to be a disgusting little teen..
Why is it always people that have like 10 posts or less the ones that are the most adamant on protecting the "integrity" of Teamliquid?
On December 22 2012 09:31 IForgetMyUsername wrote: Shouldnt you bring this shit to /B or some other sick forum? Well ill contribute some to your awesome thread that makes no sense. I started at age of 10 and my penis have been swollen too. Between age 12-15 I could fap and came around 13 times in a row and I dont recomend it its nice but the problem is that it gets swollen and you cant do it for several days. Its better not to overfap it. Instead fapping should be kept no more then 7-8 times in a row then your best friend need some rest.
In fact.. 3-5 times a day is problaby enough for most even at that age. Its so exhausting to be a disgusting little teen..
Why is it always people that have like 10 posts or less the ones that are the most adamant on protecting the "integrity" of Teamliquid?
Strange
Because they are banned users that made new account. And if they talk nicely about TL they might not get banned when they finds out their real identities
I have actually struggled with an oversized penis for many years now. I have recently found methods of decreasing its size, and I am close to being able to wear pants again! All you have to do is wrap a belt around your member as tight as you can, and then soak that in a warm bath. After you do that unwrap it and try to cram it into your pelvis with as much force as you can. I then have my roommates come in to laugh at it and call it names (I have tried to use women, but they are simply stunned silent when I show them). The only problem is that my balls are the same size, so my junk looks like a flesh colored pumpkin with a broken stem. :/
On December 25 2012 14:36 theaxis12 wrote: I have actually struggled with an oversized penis for many years now. I have recently found methods of decreasing its size, and I am close to being able to wear pants again! All you have to do is wrap a belt around your member as tight as you can, and then soak that in a warm bath. After you do that unwrap it and try to cram it into your pelvis with as much force as you can. I then have my roommates come in to laugh at it and call it names (I have tried to use women, but they are simply stunned silent when I show them). The only problem is that my balls are the same size, so my junk looks like a flesh colored pumpkin with a broken stem. :/
I have no idea if this is actually a joke or not since Cloud often thinks he is funny (without much success), but the actual average penis size is like 5 inches/130 mm (this study i'm using is based on a few thousand italian guys), 15% more than that is still only 150, which is still 100 milimeters shorter than that of a porn actor, and won't even remotely satisfy a chick who has the hots for guys with long weeners.
and to bring the engineer's insight mixed with information collected from my girlfriends, thickness is just as important as length.
So to simulate the problem, the simplified model of Cloud's penis is a tube (of course it could be oddly shaped but it's statistically more likely that it's average sized and shaped so a cylinder is sufficient for that). If you stretch a piece of material, the dimensions are modified but the volume stays roughly the same- this is not 100% true for a penis, since some body fluid flows in or out if you stretch it, it's not a closed system, but the difference is probably not big enough to make the simulation irrelevant.
If you stretch a tube the figure for the volume: V=((rˇ2)*π)*h -with h being the length of the penis and r the radius of a cross section (again for the sake of wholeness it's not a perfect circle but likely close to one)- changes to ((Rˇ2)*π)h*1,15, h*1,15 being the new length and R being the new radius. If you solve the equation (again, it's not equal but probably really close), R will be roughly 93% of r, so the diameter of Cloud's wood will decrease by 7%, thus by gaining length, losing thickness, which according to girls is a really important attribute. This little simulation doesn't even take into consideration that stretching one's penis can damage the structure of the tissue responsible for the erection, so the erection itself may be softer.
Figure 1: side view of a Cloud with a penis (simplified) before and after the stretching process. the dimensions tell the story. the texture is "clouded sky" for obvious reasons
Figure 2: simulation of Cloud's penis stretching. I used pvc because in the material library that was the closest thing to human body tissue. note that the colors indicate where the displacement in length is concentrated, with red being the most. it's easy to observe that the tip, which is actually the most sensitive part suffers the most displacement which might result in extreme pain. And yes I know that a youtube video 'technically' isn't a figure, jeez just... okay?
Note on Fig. 2 that you cause 6 megapascals of stress inside your pvc-penis by stretching it out by 24 milimeters, and if it's 20 milimeters thick, you decrease the thickness by approx. 1,4 mm, making it longer, but weaker and thinner. Thus, continous stretching may result in a scenario like Fig.3.
Figure 3. The picture shows what Cloud's over stretched willy might look like while the only strain on it is the gravity load caused by its own weight. we can easily observe that while overall length is impressive, the shape and thickness and overall position is less attractive.
individual results may slightly vary- but stretching your d1ck comes at a price, Cloud.
On January 21 2013 22:45 totauksz wrote: I have no idea if this is actually a joke or not since Cloud often thinks he is funny (without much success), but the actual average penis size is like 5 inches/130 mm (this study i'm using is based on a few thousand italian guys), 15% more than that is still only 150, which is still 100 milimeters shorter than that of a porn actor, and won't even remotely satisfy a chick who has the hots for guys with long weeners.
and to bring the engineer's insight mixed with information collected from my girlfriends, thickness is just as important as length.
So to simulate the problem, the simplified model of Cloud's penis is a tube (of course it could be oddly shaped but it's statistically more likely that it's average sized and shaped so a cylinder is sufficient for that). If you stretch a piece of material, the dimensions are modified but the volume stays roughly the same- this is not 100% true for a penis, since some body fluid flows in or out if you stretch it, it's not a closed system, but the difference is probably not big enough to make the simulation irrelevant.
If you stretch a tube the figure for the volume: V=((rˇ2)*π)*h -with h being the length of the penis and r the radius of a cross section (again for the sake of wholeness it's not a perfect circle but likely close to one)- changes to ((Rˇ2)*π)h*1,15, h*1,15 being the new length and R being the new radius. If you solve the equation (again, it's not equal but probably really close), R will be roughly 93% of r, so the diameter of Cloud's wood will decrease by 7%, thus by gaining length, losing thickness, which according to girls is a really important attribute. This little simulation doesn't even take into consideration that stretching one's penis can damage the structure of the tissue responsible for the erection, so the erection itself may be softer.
Figure 1: side view of a Cloud with a penis (simplified) before and after the stretching process. the dimensions tell the story. the texture is "clouded sky" for obvious reasons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKmn_P6afdc&feature=youtu.be Figure 2: simulation of Cloud's penis stretching. I used pvc because in the material library that was the closest thing to human body tissue. note that the colors indicate where the displacement in length is concentrated, with red being the most. it's easy to observe that the tip, which is actually the most sensitive part suffers the most displacement which might result in extreme pain. And yes I know that a youtube video 'technically' isn't a figure, jeez just... okay?
Note on Fig. 2 that you cause 6 megapascals of stress inside your pvc-penis by stretching it out by 24 milimeters, and if it's 20 milimeters thick, you decrease the thickness by approx. 1,4 mm, making it longer, but weaker and thinner. Thus, continous stretching may result in a scenario like Fig.3.
Figure 3. The picture shows what Cloud's over stretched willy might look like while the only strain on it is the gravity load caused by its own weight. we can easily observe that while overall length is impressive, the shape and thickness and overall position is less attractive.
individual results may slightly vary- but stretching your d1ck comes at a price, Cloud.
fuckin looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool. This thread does not stop giving.
On January 21 2013 22:45 totauksz wrote: I have no idea if this is actually a joke or not since Cloud often thinks he is funny (without much success), but the actual average penis size is like 5 inches/130 mm (this study i'm using is based on a few thousand italian guys), 15% more than that is still only 150, which is still 100 milimeters shorter than that of a porn actor, and won't even remotely satisfy a chick who has the hots for guys with long weeners.
and to bring the engineer's insight mixed with information collected from my girlfriends, thickness is just as important as length.
So to simulate the problem, the simplified model of Cloud's penis is a tube (of course it could be oddly shaped but it's statistically more likely that it's average sized and shaped so a cylinder is sufficient for that). If you stretch a piece of material, the dimensions are modified but the volume stays roughly the same- this is not 100% true for a penis, since some body fluid flows in or out if you stretch it, it's not a closed system, but the difference is probably not big enough to make the simulation irrelevant.
If you stretch a tube the figure for the volume: V=((rˇ2)*π)*h -with h being the length of the penis and r the radius of a cross section (again for the sake of wholeness it's not a perfect circle but likely close to one)- changes to ((Rˇ2)*π)h*1,15, h*1,15 being the new length and R being the new radius. If you solve the equation (again, it's not equal but probably really close), R will be roughly 93% of r, so the diameter of Cloud's wood will decrease by 7%, thus by gaining length, losing thickness, which according to girls is a really important attribute. This little simulation doesn't even take into consideration that stretching one's penis can damage the structure of the tissue responsible for the erection, so the erection itself may be softer.
Figure 1: side view of a Cloud with a penis (simplified) before and after the stretching process. the dimensions tell the story. the texture is "clouded sky" for obvious reasons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKmn_P6afdc&feature=youtu.be Figure 2: simulation of Cloud's penis stretching. I used pvc because in the material library that was the closest thing to human body tissue. note that the colors indicate where the displacement in length is concentrated, with red being the most. it's easy to observe that the tip, which is actually the most sensitive part suffers the most displacement which might result in extreme pain. And yes I know that a youtube video 'technically' isn't a figure, jeez just... okay?
Note on Fig. 2 that you cause 6 megapascals of stress inside your pvc-penis by stretching it out by 24 milimeters, and if it's 20 milimeters thick, you decrease the thickness by approx. 1,4 mm, making it longer, but weaker and thinner. Thus, continous stretching may result in a scenario like Fig.3.
Figure 3. The picture shows what Cloud's over stretched willy might look like while the only strain on it is the gravity load caused by its own weight. we can easily observe that while overall length is impressive, the shape and thickness and overall position is less attractive.
individual results may slightly vary- but stretching your d1ck comes at a price, Cloud.
EPT![[image loading]](http://img223.imageshack.us/img223/3817/kruemelmonsteryn0.gif)
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/uoRVH.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/vmMJ3.gif)
)![[image loading]](http://oi47.tinypic.com/29xx15f.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://oi49.tinypic.com/e7b5s7.jpg)
