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It wasn’t a particularly interesting day. My friend I had met only a week ago had invited me to a friendly game of chess at his house. I knew I wasn’t that good at chess, but I decided to give it a go anyways. As I entered his house, my friend immediately brought out his antique chess set. All the pieces were heavy and individually carved to resemble the figures they were supposed to represent. We sat down to play a minute after he brought the board out.
But then he said something that brought my skin to a boil. My face turned a crimson red and my eyes shot knives through his soul. I grabbed the pointiest piece off the board and jammed it into his eye. It must have been fate that the knights on the board were holding upright spears. They knew that their sole purpose in life was for my benefit. I smashed the glass chess board down on his head, breaking it into shards dripping with blood. As my “friend” cried in pain, I bashed him over the head with the two kings, working side by side like they should have in the middle ages. As one king began to grow weary and tired, he would step down and appoint the queen to take his place. My friend had lost the game.
To think I once even considered him my friend. No amount of apologizing would have ever made up for his sins. As I left the room with the mangled, chess-piece ridden corpse, I thought back to what he said when the game started. He should have picked black.
User was warned for this post
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This is the weirdest blog I've ever read. And I've read some pretty wierd blogs.
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United States9977 Posts
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Well, I tried my hand at some comedic murder stories. Guess the majority of TL didn't find them all that great haha. I'll have to find some other thing to write about now.
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"I like chess, but checkers is where the real strategy is at."
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Carved pieces on a glass board? Weird. Also "bash" isn't the word I would use to describe hitting someone with an object that's a few inches long and weighs less than half a pound.
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That was an interesting read. Another way to look at chess, I guess.
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Awww, a bit too graphic, I suppose.
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On October 24 2012 10:59 hp.Shell wrote:Awww, a bit too graphic, I suppose.
Haha yeah. I probably should have toned it down a bit lol. I was mainly hoping the joke was clear enough at the end: That he died because he chose white over black. I don't think some of the readers got it.
I guess that ends the saga of Epishade's comedic murder blogs. It lasted 2 whole blogs!
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Noooo don't stop! I really laughed!
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I don't get it
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