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Active: 1506 users

1000 Posts! Thank You's and Trans Issues - Page 2

Blogs > Iyerbeth
Post a Reply
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-_-Quails
Profile Joined February 2011
Australia796 Posts
April 03 2012 22:08 GMT
#21
Congrats on the 1K posts.
I'm really glad you felt comfortable making a post like this, and that you spoke up against "erbs".

Good luck with getting together the money you need.
"I post only when my brain works." - Reaper9
Kerotan
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
England2109 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-04-03 23:13:32
April 03 2012 23:12 GMT
#22
Grats on 1k!
Every time I see one of your posts, I smile a little, another lurker recognising one of their own :D
You should come on IRC more
Nerdette // External revolution - Internal revolution // Fabulous // I raise my hands to heaven of curiosity // I don't know what to ask for // What has it got for me? // Kerribear
Liquid`TLO
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Germany767 Posts
April 04 2012 00:08 GMT
#23
Gratz!

Keep it up, 10k up next
Team Liquidalea iacta est
Mauldo
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States750 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-04-04 00:59:58
April 04 2012 00:56 GMT
#24
I really appreciate your blog! Insightful and kinda cool. Whatever makes you happy, I'd say. Sorry, I'm from 'Merica, so I say 'erbs. We drop all kinds of letters over here.

If you could answer one question; it's about the "Well, you'll never be a real woman" paragraph. I'm confused because I don't quite know what you think a "woman" is after reading the paragraph. You seem to run through everything that could define a woman and refuse them as possible definitions of a woman, and I'm left confused. Do you just have to feel like a woman to be a woman? Or do you really think you need the organs and the body parts to be a woman? Or are you just insulted that someone is trying to define what a woman is?


Troxle
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
United States486 Posts
April 04 2012 01:28 GMT
#25
On April 04 2012 09:08 Liquid`TLO wrote:
Gratz!

Keep it up, 10k up next


Might not be Sheth but TLO is just as good! You attracted greatness Iyerbeth! :D
If you're homophobic, you're probably ugly, so don't worry about a gay guy coming onto you. - jarrydesque
Proseat
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
Germany5113 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-04-04 01:41:05
April 04 2012 01:35 GMT
#26
More power to you, Iyerbeth! The clueless need to be educated.

Gratz on 1k posts and I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. From what recent cases I heard and read about in Germany, medical insurance eventually covered the costs for sex re-assignment surgery when GID (ICD-10 F64) was diagnosed and re-affirmed by an independent medical institution.
The Rise and Fall of SlayerS -- a timeline: http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=378097
AmericanUmlaut
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Germany2590 Posts
April 04 2012 06:27 GMT
#27
Congratulations, and thanks for taking the time to share something so personal with the rest of us. I'm glad TL is a place where you feel like you can represent yourself honestly, that and the presence of brave people like you make me proud to be part of the community.
The frumious Bandersnatch
Promethelax
Profile Joined February 2012
Canada7089 Posts
April 04 2012 07:25 GMT
#28
I'm really glad you were in the Transgendered thread before I got there, you managed to say things in a way that wasn't mean and inflammatory to the people who were being...less than pleasant. That made it easier for me not to be inflammatory in response and the thread has continued to evolve into a learning experience for at least a few users. These is now at least one Transgendered person in it posting as well as yourself and it seems to be going in a decent way.
Thanks for being you.

'erbs fighting!
TL Mafia. Love it. Play it. http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/index.php?show_part=31 I find Kennigit really attractive. If anyone has a picture of him please feel free to PM it to me.
Cassel_Castle
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States820 Posts
April 04 2012 07:40 GMT
#29
I like your points on trans issues but I don't get why you're against people saying 'erb? Then again I get annoyed when people say "yoo-man" or "yooge" instead of human, huge.
Swede
Profile Joined June 2010
New Zealand853 Posts
April 04 2012 09:28 GMT
#30
I have a question: Are there just as many trans-women (women who identify as men... Sorry don't know what the preferred term is) as trans-men? My impression is that trans-men far outweigh trans-women, but that is purely based on exposure and not statistics (can't find any). I'm curious because you would expect a fairly even divide between the two, but it seems there isn't (once again, just my impression). If that is the case, why do you think that is?
McFeser
Profile Joined July 2011
United States2458 Posts
April 04 2012 13:19 GMT
#31
I drop all of my "H"s and there is nothing you can do to elp me.
Promethelax still hasn't changed his quote
Ares[Effort] *
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
DEMACIA6550 Posts
April 04 2012 15:35 GMT
#32
Congrats on your 1k
Moderatorgold coin
HardlyNever
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States1258 Posts
April 04 2012 16:06 GMT
#33
Suprised no one has done it yet but:

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/herb

Both pronouciations are correct.
Out there, the Kid learned to fend for himself. Learned to build. Learned to break.
Iyerbeth
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
England2410 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-04-04 20:57:43
April 04 2012 20:55 GMT
#34
Wow, thank you everyone. I actually started this replying to every single new post but there's so many! As such I'll be responding to questions and stuff but I want to thank you all for your kind support.

On April 04 2012 04:22 Praetorial wrote:
+ Show Spoiler [Show Full Quote] +

lyerbeth,

Reading this was really inspiring. One of my very close family members(not going to say how related due to privacy issues relating to employer) is transgender, and has not yet made the transition. She(I use "she" because she identifies as female) is currently in a position where her admittance or revelation of transgender sentiments would get her immediately fired(read:discharged). She also must stay at her job for another year, despite being a veteran. By now, you can probably guess who her employer is.

It's been a long and difficult journey for her. Ever since she was seven, she identified as female, but her parents tried to suppress it and did not listen to their family doctor's advice on transitions. In order to relieve the pressure she felt, she cut herself and inflicted pain. And then she made the decision, on last time, to enroll in a college. The college that trained "employees" for her future "employer". She had the appearance of a very fit man after four years went by and she graduated, but still identified as female.

In a year, she can leave her job. She'll then make the transition, and hopefully live her life the way she always wanted to live it.

Thank you for your story, lyerbeth.

Also: congrats on 1K, nice to see I'm not the only one on TL with a lurker icon.

Edit: While I am only a freshman in highschool, I can perhaps help a bit with the financial aspect. In the case of my relative, she attended a college that paid her, and saved almost all of it except on her boss computer and games. She will also be getting money from her parents, who have done a 180 on their opinion of transgender people. When I found out about it about five months ago, I also did a 180. Funny how fate works. Anyways, she is getting a lot of money from her family, have you tried your own?


Thank you for sharing your relatives story (I appreciate the difficulty in going in to detail as a rule, but I also wouldn't ask you to without her permission), and also for pointing out my Lurker icon. I hadn't noticed it, but it's pretty awesome. In the case of asking family for financial help, one side of my family is helping as much as they can, but without going in to detail aren't able to provide that level of assistance and I wouldn't dream of asking them to. They do so much for me already and have really helped me get this far. The other side would choose to not help (removed explanation as it was too depressing for this blog ).

On April 04 2012 08:12 Kerotan wrote:
Grats on 1k!
Every time I see one of your posts, I smile a little, another lurker recognising one of their own :D
You should come on IRC more


Thank you, I really should!

On April 04 2012 09:08 Liquid`TLO wrote:
Gratz!

Keep it up, 10k up next


Thank you!! :D

On April 04 2012 09:56 Mauldo wrote:
I really appreciate your blog! Insightful and kinda cool. Whatever makes you happy, I'd say. Sorry, I'm from 'Merica, so I say 'erbs. We drop all kinds of letters over here.

If you could answer one question; it's about the "Well, you'll never be a real woman" paragraph. I'm confused because I don't quite know what you think a "woman" is after reading the paragraph. You seem to run through everything that could define a woman and refuse them as possible definitions of a woman, and I'm left confused. Do you just have to feel like a woman to be a woman? Or do you really think you need the organs and the body parts to be a woman? Or are you just insulted that someone is trying to define what a woman is?


Thanks, as to that paragraph I was trying to get across that women come in all shapes, sizes and attitudes and that really the final chice should come down to the honest view of the individual. In an ideal world, biologically at least, sex and gender would be far more simple things with everyone born happy, healthy and biologically correctly but until then I don't think any definition beyond "adult female" is fair or accurate. Those things listed can definately help to define a woman and are useful biological descriptions though of course, so I guess it'd be more fair to say it should be determined on a context basis.

On April 04 2012 10:35 Proseat wrote:
Gratz on 1k posts and I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. From what recent cases I heard and read about in Germany, medical insurance eventually covered the costs for sex re-assignment surgery when GID (ICD-10 F64) was diagnosed and re-affirmed by an independent medical institution.


Thanks, and glad to hear about that in Germany! In the UK I could access the NHS route, but without going in to detail it is not the surgery I think I need, as there are multiple versions and it might sound like I'm being picky but it's something I can only do once and I have to get it right, and I don't think the version the government will cover is right.

On April 04 2012 16:40 Cassel_Castle wrote:
I like your points on trans issues but I don't get why you're against people saying 'erb? Then again I get annoyed when people say "yoo-man" or "yooge" instead of human, huge.


It just sounds so forced when I hear it. Like people are actually correcting themselves to fit what is essentially an incorrect pronounciation.

On April 04 2012 22:19 McFeser wrote:
I drop all of my "H"s and there is nothing you can do to elp me.


I can pick them up for you!

On April 04 2012 18:28 Swede wrote:
I have a question: Are there just as many trans-women (women who identify as men... Sorry don't know what the preferred term is) as trans-men? My impression is that trans-men far outweigh trans-women, but that is purely based on exposure and not statistics (can't find any). I'm curious because you would expect a fairly even divide between the two, but it seems there isn't (once again, just my impression). If that is the case, why do you think that is?


You did get the usual terms the wrong way round (Trans women is usually used to denote a woman who started biologically male, and visa versa) but it's understandable. Anyway, to answer your question it depends on who you ask. I believe almost any person involved with a trans network will tell you there are actually more FtM's (female to male, so trans men) than MtF's, but almost every statistic you see will tell you the opposite, and of course when you see trans people on the street it will almost always be a woman.

The reasons for this are 3 fold, first and most obviously the effects of testosterone are a lot harder to mask, especially in the early stages of transitioning, so we tend to stick out a lot more especially around the rougher edges. When a trans man starts testosterone his voice will drop and he'll start growing facial hair (both very quickly), which are basically the most immediate markers that people notice, making them far harder to pick out. Also the media loves trans women, because socially, and surgically people consider it a bit weirder in general.

The second reason is statistics based on surgery tend to be based on genital surgery, which is far more common amongst trans women because of how well known it is, and that the results can be anywhere from reasonable to very successful. As a result, more people elect for the surgery currently, so that changes the numbers significantly.

Finally, the statistics based visitting dr's for treatment are skewed significantly too. I'm not going to tell people how to self medicate here (don't) but an FtM man could quite easily get everything needed to transition themselves without anyone knowing, and many do. The converse is significantly harder, though can be done. However, since you need to see a dr for 2 years before surgery, if you're not planning on surgery, MtFs are going to end up showing up far more often in statistics again.

Realistically I think the numbers are actually around about even, though if I were to answer purely on what I have experienced, trans men are actually more common.

On April 05 2012 01:06 HardlyNever wrote:
Suprised no one has done it yet but:

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/herb

Both pronouciations are correct.


Only in the same way al-oo-min-um is also a correct pronounciation of al-you-min-ee-um.




Thank you all once again, and as before if you have any further questions please let me know!
♥ Liquid`Sheth ♥ Liquid`TLO ♥
Azera
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
3800 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-04-06 01:00:34
April 04 2012 22:34 GMT
#35
Thank you for teaching me to be more tolerant. In my culture, it is very easy to hate on homosexuals/transsexuals because the nature of my culture weeds out those that are different, or special and eschews them. I have always thought that putting or imposing arbitrary standards on something as special and unique as us humans as disgusting. We are all unique, we may even be the only humans in the Universe, and when we consider all the life forms there is, you can see that each one of us is one in a trillion, or a quadrillion. Is there even a number big enough?


Edit: fixed a serious typo
Check out some great music made by TLers - http://bit.ly/QXYhdb , by intrigue. http://bit.ly/RTjpOR , by ohsea.toc.
GeorgeForeman
Profile Joined April 2005
United States1746 Posts
April 05 2012 17:30 GMT
#36
Thanks for the post! Very informative and well-written.

Two questions:

1) Do you pronounce "hour" as "hower" or "ower"? :-)

2) You are pretty emphatic about a couple of points in your post. The first is that gender roles are meaningless ("I don't conform to beliefs that boys and girls have to act in any specific way", but you also say that from a very early time, you knew you were a girl/woman. Am I wrong to think these two views represent something of a contradiction? If gender roles don't exist, what makes a person a woman or a man?
like a school bus through a bunch of kids
Iyerbeth
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
England2410 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-04-05 19:34:08
April 05 2012 19:31 GMT
#37
On April 06 2012 02:30 GeorgeForeman wrote:
1) Do you pronounce "hour" as "hower" or "ower"? :-)

2) You are pretty emphatic about a couple of points in your post. The first is that gender roles are meaningless ("I don't conform to beliefs that boys and girls have to act in any specific way", but you also say that from a very early time, you knew you were a girl/woman. Am I wrong to think these two views represent something of a contradiction? If gender roles don't exist, what makes a person a woman or a man?


1: I pronounce it as "ow-er", but I also pronounce hourly, hours in the same way and so far as I'm that is the correct version which (more importantly ) doesn't annoy me. Do you pronounce hers as "ers"?

2: A question which thanks to the beauty contest thread I've actually been putting a lot of thought in to how to express, and to be honest I've found myself for the first time unable to find an answer I think covers everything properly.* I don't know if it's a limitation in language or in my use of it, but gender I'm finding is a more and more insufficient word.

Gender roles are roles applied to genders and so are of course not actually the object, "gender". I think as a free species that's an important distinction as if people were not able to act as they wished and were bound to a series of roles then we would find people far less interesting than they actually are.

When I say I realised at a young age I was a girl it was something far more fundamental than how I wanted to dress, or which toys I wanted to play with. I realised how much my body was going to change as I reached adult hood and I hated the realisation as it wasn't right. As I grew older the issues became far more obvious and far more concerning. Fundamentally I was different to the boys I was grouped with, and the situations that forced me in to were gradually more unbearable.

The reason I'm making these points is to try to express in idea's a word I can't find. There is some gender identity which I believe is available to all, but which is acutely a problem if it is not in line with your sex. The user Squarewalker said earlier today on this site a comment which I think sums it up "To cisgender people it may seem like being a certain gender doesn't have a feel to it - and yes, it's a lot like breathing in that sense I guess. Being able to breathe does not make you happy, but not being able to is suffocating."

Being a man or a woman is something which is hard to quantify, but it can not be a way of acting, of appearing or even genetics as they vary wildly from person to person of either sex. It must then be something other than that, an identity. I don't think I could define it better than "an adult male" or "an adult female", and leave it to the individual to understand to which they honestly belong. Gender roles I must leave to society.

*Edit: Also, I'm really thankful that there are people on TeamLiquid who can make these points so well that I find myself in this position at all. The level of thought which goes in to discussions from other users is something which I really love about TL when it happens.
♥ Liquid`Sheth ♥ Liquid`TLO ♥
Sayle
Profile Joined October 2010
United Kingdom3685 Posts
April 05 2012 20:17 GMT
#38
Congrats on 1k and thanks for taking the time to make those long posts. The one in the Miss Universe thread was really enlightening.
seenster
Profile Joined December 2010
Germany385 Posts
April 06 2012 10:57 GMT
#39
gratz on 1k. and a little question:

you mentioned your nearly non-existent qualifications. has the fact that you being trans effected your education in some kind of way? f.e. has anyone denied you access to qualifications because they knew you being trans?

btw. i'm kind of being glad that you are posting this in here. TL is just awesome
glhf!
JOJOsc2news
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
3000 Posts
April 06 2012 11:38 GMT
#40
On April 06 2012 19:57 seenster wrote:
gratz on 1k. and a little question:

you mentioned your nearly non-existent qualifications. has the fact that you being trans effected your education in some kind of way? f.e. has anyone denied you access to qualifications because they knew you being trans?

btw. i'm kind of being glad that you are posting this in here. TL is just awesome
glhf!


No institution will deny you access in this day and age when it comes to education. If they would, the Student's Associations and Unions would be all over it, rightfully so!
✉ Tweets @sc2channel ⌦ Blog: http://www.teamliquid.net/blog/JOJO ⌫ "Arbiterssss... build more arbiterssss." Click 'Profile' for awesome shiro art!
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