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I want to give a serious answer but this thread is cracking me up too much.
Here goes
@OP. This may just be me, but I've always held the belief that love triumps over all. IN THAT, if you love someone, that is the most important thing to you. By my belief at least, this girl doesn't actually truly love you.
So I'd say, give her an ultimatum. Face it, you know it's over in 5 months, why drag in on? Tell her that you love her and want to be with her (I think you do), and if she felt the same way she would agree. Don't let her bulslhit you, if she doesn't agree than it's a no.
After that, it's up to you. Personally I'd suggest getting to know the german girl a bit more before springing an offer on her or anything. But I would like to caution you that I think dealing with your current relationship is the far more important thing, at least at the moment.
Also don't listen to the idiots calling you a scumbag. There is nothing wrong with feeling attraction towards another women if your relationship is faltering. It's not like you've cheated or anything.
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On January 24 2012 09:10 HardlyNever wrote:
I've already considered telling her I'm interested in other women. That really wouldn't be that great of an idea, actually, because that would just as likely make her want to be with me more (temporarily), then make her not want to be with me at all.
On January 24 2012 07:10 HardlyNever wrote:
Have you even ever been in a relationship?
O.o
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ROFL, dAPhREAk is so right on this.
Put simply, if you wanted your current relationship to work you would have worked out what to do. Right now you are coming to TL to try and get justification for acting like a child. Make up your own mind and then grow a spine and make a decision. If you really think your current relationship has any future then you put your efforts into making that a reality. If not, call it off and go fuck your german lady.
Blaiming this shit on your current girlfriend is so weak.
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On January 24 2012 09:37 Probulous wrote:
ROFL, dAPhREAk is so right on this.
Put simply, if you wanted your current relationship to work you would have worked out what to do. Right now you are coming to TL to try and get justification for acting like a child. Make up your own mind and then grow a spine and make a decision. If you really think your current relationship has any future then you put your efforts into making that a reality. If not, call it off and go fuck your german lady.
Blaiming this shit on your current girlfriend is so weak.
Never once did I blame anyone for anything. Nor am I looking for "justification" for anything. If you guys seriously think I would do what anyone says here, you are retarded. The first post could have been "dooooood bang the german chick," you think I would have done that?
I put this up mainly for entertainment purposes, and it has delivered. I also put it up for self-reflection and for the few meaningful, non-troll posts that have shown up, because I might read a few ideas that I haven't considered. Sp far, no go, but I still appreciate the few guys on these forums that have real experience with women and relationships.
I also got the expected virgin/white-knight/pussy-on-a-pedestal (see your post) responses that populate these forums too, and those are good for a laugh.
Keep 'em all coming. Just don't think I'm taking this too seriously. For all you know, I made this entire story up.
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It's not white-knighting or pussy on a pedestal, it is basic respect.
Finally, are you saying that this whole thing is a troll? If so, fuck you. People with actual issues come here and genuinely ask for help. You might find it funny, but others don't. So take your macho bullshit elsewhere.
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On January 24 2012 10:00 Probulous wrote:
It's not white-knighting or pussy on a pedestal, it is basic respect.
Finally, are you saying that this whole thing is a troll? If so, fuck you. People with actual issues come here and genuinely ask for help. You might find it funny, but others don't. So take your macho bullshit elsewhere.
So why do you come here then? To GENUINELY act like a douche-bag and call people that need advice "spineless" and "cowards?"
That isn't giving help.
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On January 24 2012 10:00 Probulous wrote:
It's not white-knighting or pussy on a pedestal, it is basic respect.
Finally, are you saying that this whole thing is a troll? If so, fuck you. People with actual issues come here and genuinely ask for help. You might find it funny, but others don't. So take your macho bullshit elsewhere.
Probulous, Probulous, Probulous. it is your own fault you know... you should have known better.... when somebody says it is good for their relationship that they tell their current girlfriend that they want to bang the german dancer chick next door, you should know that they are incredibly stupid, or just trolling you. at the end of the day, we can't blame HardlyNever. we can only blame ourselves for listening to his idiotic ramblings and thinking he wasn't just making stories.... I, for one, am very sad that i believed that his idiotic and slimeballish posts were true. lol.
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On January 24 2012 09:47 HardlyNever wrote:Show nested quote +On January 24 2012 09:37 Probulous wrote:
ROFL, dAPhREAk is so right on this.
Put simply, if you wanted your current relationship to work you would have worked out what to do. Right now you are coming to TL to try and get justification for acting like a child. Make up your own mind and then grow a spine and make a decision. If you really think your current relationship has any future then you put your efforts into making that a reality. If not, call it off and go fuck your german lady.
Blaiming this shit on your current girlfriend is so weak. Never once did I blame anyone for anything. Nor am I looking for "justification" for anything. If you guys seriously think I would do what anyone says here, you are retarded. The first post could have been "dooooood bang the german chick," you think I would have done that? I put this up mainly for entertainment purposes, and it has delivered. I also put it up for self-reflection and for the few meaningful, non-troll posts that have shown up, because I might read a few ideas that I haven't considered. Sp far, no go, but I still appreciate the few guys on these forums that have real experience with women and relationships. I also got the expected virgin/white-knight/pussy-on-a-pedestal (see your post) responses that populate these forums too, and those are good for a laugh. Keep 'em all coming. Just don't think I'm taking this too seriously. For all you know, I made this entire story up.
see? total scumbag.
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HardlyNever, it's a tough problem. But since what you want is a long term relationship, and you won't get that (at least right now) with your current girlfriend, I think I'm leaning towards breaking up with her. Throw the dice and let the chips fall were they may.
I haven't experienced the situation, but it feels like a relationship with a clear expiration date will just get worse as it get's closer to that date.
It seems to me that you are pretty interested in this German girl, and if you don't go for it you will probably just ask yourself "what if?" in the future. And hey, if it doesn't work out with that girl you can still meet other girls during these 4-5 months.
Having that said though, it kind of depends on your feelings towards your girlfriend.
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loooooooooooooool this is getting good.
On January 24 2012 09:47 HardlyNever wrote:Show nested quote +On January 24 2012 09:37 Probulous wrote:
ROFL, dAPhREAk is so right on this.
Put simply, if you wanted your current relationship to work you would have worked out what to do. Right now you are coming to TL to try and get justification for acting like a child. Make up your own mind and then grow a spine and make a decision. If you really think your current relationship has any future then you put your efforts into making that a reality. If not, call it off and go fuck your german lady.
Blaiming this shit on your current girlfriend is so weak. Never once did I blame anyone for anything. Nor am I looking for "justification" for anything. If you guys seriously think I would do what anyone says here, you are retarded. The first post could have been "dooooood bang the german chick," you think I would have done that? I put this up mainly for entertainment purposes, and it has delivered. I also put it up for self-reflection and for the few meaningful, non-troll posts that have shown up, because I might read a few ideas that I haven't considered. Sp far, no go, but I still appreciate the few guys on these forums that have real experience with women and relationships. I also got the expected virgin/white-knight/pussy-on-a-pedestal (see your post) responses that populate these forums too, and those are good for a laugh. Keep 'em all coming. Just don't think I'm taking this too seriously. For all you know, I made this entire story up.
Oic it was mostly just a joke.
Wait, how did you know that there would be "non-troll" posts showing up before you posted this? Unless.. did you post this from the future? But then you would know what you've already decided to do and wouldn't need to post this... O.O
On January 24 2012 10:03 HardlyNever wrote:Show nested quote +On January 24 2012 10:00 Probulous wrote:
It's not white-knighting or pussy on a pedestal, it is basic respect.
Finally, are you saying that this whole thing is a troll? If so, fuck you. People with actual issues come here and genuinely ask for help. You might find it funny, but others don't. So take your macho bullshit elsewhere. So why do you come here then? To GENUINELY act like a douche-bag and call people that need advice "spineless" and "cowards?" That isn't giving help.
Wait now, hold on. I thought you just said you put this up for entertainment value and the non-troll posts that you somehow knew would show up, now you need advice again? Hmm I can't make any sense of this. Better put this into my universal translator. *tricorder sound*Ah, yes here it is:
Translation: "I just realized that I look like a dumb jerk and instead of backing down and admitting I'm wrong I'll just pretend it was allllll just a funny funny joke."
Let me give you some serious advice here Captain Hercules: First of all, none of us are impressed by what I'm sure you perceive as your amazing talents with the ladies.
Second, learn when to back down. All of us are wrong sometimes (I'm wrong all the damn time about tons of stuff) or outweighed in opinion. Sometimes you just have to back the fuck down.
Third, don't call Probulous a douche-bag, we like him a whole hell-of-a lot more than you.
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On January 24 2012 10:30 TheToast wrote:loooooooooooooool this is getting good. Show nested quote +On January 24 2012 09:47 HardlyNever wrote:On January 24 2012 09:37 Probulous wrote:
ROFL, dAPhREAk is so right on this.
Put simply, if you wanted your current relationship to work you would have worked out what to do. Right now you are coming to TL to try and get justification for acting like a child. Make up your own mind and then grow a spine and make a decision. If you really think your current relationship has any future then you put your efforts into making that a reality. If not, call it off and go fuck your german lady.
Blaiming this shit on your current girlfriend is so weak. Never once did I blame anyone for anything. Nor am I looking for "justification" for anything. If you guys seriously think I would do what anyone says here, you are retarded. The first post could have been "dooooood bang the german chick," you think I would have done that? I put this up mainly for entertainment purposes, and it has delivered. I also put it up for self-reflection and for the few meaningful, non-troll posts that have shown up, because I might read a few ideas that I haven't considered. Sp far, no go, but I still appreciate the few guys on these forums that have real experience with women and relationships. I also got the expected virgin/white-knight/pussy-on-a-pedestal (see your post) responses that populate these forums too, and those are good for a laugh. Keep 'em all coming. Just don't think I'm taking this too seriously. For all you know, I made this entire story up. Oic it was mostly just a joke. Wait, how did you know that there would be "non-troll" posts showing up before you posted this? Unless.. did you post this from the future? But then you would know what you've already decided to do and wouldn't need to post this... O.O Show nested quote +On January 24 2012 10:03 HardlyNever wrote:On January 24 2012 10:00 Probulous wrote:
It's not white-knighting or pussy on a pedestal, it is basic respect.
Finally, are you saying that this whole thing is a troll? If so, fuck you. People with actual issues come here and genuinely ask for help. You might find it funny, but others don't. So take your macho bullshit elsewhere. So why do you come here then? To GENUINELY act like a douche-bag and call people that need advice "spineless" and "cowards?" That isn't giving help. Wait now, hold on. I thought you just said you put this up for entertainment value and the non-troll posts that you somehow knew would show up, now you need advice again? Hmm I can't make any sense of this. Better put this into my universal translator. *tricorder sound*Ah, yes here it is: Translation: "I just realized that I look like a dumb jerk and instead of backing down and admitting I'm wrong I'll just pretend it was allllll just a funny funny joke." Let me give you some serious advice here Captain Hercules: First of all, none of us are impressed by what I'm sure you perceive as your amazing talents with the ladies. Second, learn when to back down. All of us are wrong sometimes (I'm wrong all the damn time about tons of stuff) or outweighed in opinion. Sometimes you just have to back the fuck down. Third, don't call Probulous a douche-bag, we like him a whole hell-of-a lot more than you.
Keeps getting better. Judging by your post count, you aren't exactly new to TL. If you don't know what kind of posts will be in a certain thread from the title alone, you just aren't too sharp. It is the internet. There are the same types of posts in almost all threads like this. I didn't think this required explanation, but apparently it does.
I didn't say I needed advice from probulus or whoever, I just asked why he came to these threads if he just acts like an ass in them, if he believes people genuinely needs advice. Either you are here to give advice or you aren't; acting like a douche and insulting the OP in any advice thread isn't helpful. I could ask you the same thing.
Also, I'm not backing down from anything, as there isn't anything to back down from. I haven't made a decision, and if you think there is anything wrong with thinking things out, than you are more of an idiot than your post implies.
Finally, I don't care who you like or don't like, including me. Never once did I try to "impress anyone with my talents with the ladies," and I wouldn't see why you would take it that way unless you were insecure about yourself, which I already assume the haters in this thread are, otherwise they wouldn't act like douchebags, honestly.
Again, this is assuming this is even real...
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Would you like a shovel?
You clearly never intended to listen to any advice given by anyone who disagreed with you. When people call you out on your behaviour you claim this whole thing is a joke. Why should anyone take you seriously? I always give genuine advice, even if it is somewhat harsh. Calling a spade a spade, or a coward a coward doesn't invalidate my point. If you didn't want advice, why post this and why get upset when people point out your stupidity? If it was meant as a joke then people have every right to give you shit.
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Just take the gamble. Worse case scenario, more SC2 time.
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LTR suck, dump your gf and do your neighboard
or...
On January 24 2012 11:08 Perseverance wrote:
Just take the gamble. Worse case scenario, more BW time.
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basically it sounds like your unhappy with the fact that you cant be with your gf for longer and id tell you just to end it with her now and explain how you feel, politely of course.
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On January 24 2012 09:10 HardlyNever wrote:
As far as her "not being that into me" or us not being that close, sure it is a possibility. If I were reading this, and didn't know her, I would think the same thing. It could be the case here, but I don't think so. The only thing I can really say about it, without going into too much detail, is that she would view me following her out there as too big of a commitment, that she isn't ready for with me, or anyone else, as she says. Or maybe she just isn't that into me, but she isn't the kind to lie.
You are biased. You shouldn't trust your own logic, because it's clouded by what you want to be true.
When someone says "I'm not ready for that kind of commitment because of (insert random BS excuse)" it actually means: "I don't love you, I'm just sticking to this relationships until I find something better, because it's convenient, so I have no reason to commit any further."
She probably wanted to break up with you before, but didn't have the guts to do it. Or the reason could be that she hadn't thought about your relationship for the long term and that when she realized that you two would have to make a big commitment soon, she realized that she didn't love you enough. Either way, it's over.
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On January 24 2012 07:03 dAPhREAk wrote:
you kind of sound like a slimeball to me. you should break up with your girlfriend so that she doesn't have to be with you anymore. thats the best thing you can do for her. as for the german, after you break up with your girlfriend, go for her if you want, but if you are just going to string her along like you are doing your current girlfriend then you should leave her alone too.
females are not objects for you to toy with at your pleasure....
You sound jealous of the OP actually i think he clearly stated his situation and that their relationship is going to end in 5 months.
Quoted here
I can't decide if I should leave the current girl (it is going to end in about 5 months, no matter what I do)
As for the OP you should ask her out (after you end your relationship with your current girl-friend).
Maybe you should learn a few words in German before doing so.
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On January 24 2012 07:54 dAPhREAk wrote:Show nested quote +On January 24 2012 07:48 samw wrote:On January 24 2012 07:34 dAPhREAk wrote:On January 24 2012 07:30 HardlyNever wrote:On January 24 2012 07:24 dAPhREAk wrote:On January 24 2012 07:20 HardlyNever wrote:On January 24 2012 07:16 dAPhREAk wrote:On January 24 2012 07:10 HardlyNever wrote:On January 24 2012 07:03 dAPhREAk wrote:
you kind of sound like a slimeball to me. you should break up with your girlfriend so that she doesn't have to be with you anymore. thats the best thing you can do for her. as for the german, after you break up with your girlfriend, go for her if you want, but if you are just going to string her along like you are doing your current girlfriend then you should leave her alone too.
females are not objects for you to toy with at your pleasure.... I'm not sure where you are getting this. I'm trying to make an objective decision. Did you read the whole post? I've tried basically everything to make the current relationship work, including offering to move out to where she is going. She doesn't want that. I've said if she doesn't want to be with me, to just say so. She doesn't want that either. She is the one ending it, not me. Have you even ever been in a relationship? i read your post, and i have been in many relationships. you cant have your cake and eat it too. you want to bang your german neighbor; thats perfectly fine. break up with your girlfriend and do that. dont keep your girlfriend for the next five months so you can have your "good to amazing" regular sex. do you think your current girlfriend would maintain this relationship if she knew you had written this blog? hell no. thus, i think you are a slimeball to lust after your neighbor (but too much of a coward to take the plunge) and string your current girlfriend along. then again, if your current girlfriend doesn't mind, go for it, but you arent going to be honest with her, are you? How could you have read the whole post when I said I wasn't going to cheat on my current girlfriend? i read your self-serving statement and concluded you are trying to save face.... then you wrote that you are considering asking the german on a date without breaking up with your girlfriend, and concluded you are a hypocrite and a coward.... face it, you want to break up with your gf so you can bang the german chick, but you are afraid the german chick will say no, so you want to make sure you can stay with your current gf just in case.... before you post again, just think about it this way: would i want my girlfriend to do this shit to me? I've decided you're basically an internet tough-guy, who wants to be angry at random people he doesn't know. Save face? What are you talking about? This is the INTERNET. You don't know WHO I am. Nor do I care what internet tough guys think about me. I put that there so people wouldn't suggest to do it, because I'm not going to do it (even though I could). You don't have anything constructive to add, so please go away now. I also find it funny that someone who talks so tough over the internet calls people a "coward," when I know you wouldn't say that to my face. give me your address. Ok this is TL I know how to settle this, we don't fight. I declare a best of 5, winner takes all, loser walks away with nothing. does that mean, if i win, i get his current girlfriend, the german girl and my own fiancee?
This bo5 needs to happen, winner takes the girlfriend, the german chick, the job in the other state and dAPhREAk's fiancée
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I completely understand the point dAPhREAk is trying to make. If your girlfriend read this blog post I'm pretty damn sure shit would go down. And if your girlfriend was in the same scenario as you, I'm positive you'd be at least a little upset with her.
With that said, you just have to realize what is more important to you. Hooking up with a German girl that you hardly know and aren't even sure if she's into you, or spend the last 5 months with your girlfriend of TWO YEARS that you say you love...
My advice: If you really do love that girl, try to spend every single day with her and try to make her feel the happiest you possibly can. So that when the day finally comes, she wont be strong enough to end it with you.
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EPT
