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The Build Order of My Life: [23] Quit Job.

Blogs > [uci] Fizik
Post a Reply
[uci] Fizik
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States263 Posts
September 02 2011 03:52 GMT
#1
Boy, it's been quite a week for me. Even now I feel like everything that has happened has just been a dream. The feeling is surreal. Just yesterday I stormed out of my part time job at the research lab where I had been working at for the last 3 years. My bosses' ridiculous expectations and slave-driver like demeanor finally broke through my shields.

Ever watch horrible bosses? Sometimes I feel like puling off something like that. My boss is a 50 year old Chinese man who has the typical Asian parent syndrome, except, its at work. Simply put, he does not show any approval and only points out the mistakes. Positive reinforcement is dead with this guy. So that's one tough thing to deal with when your work environment is always full of negativity and the bar being set at perfection. He hired me part-time after I volunteer'd for him for two years straight as a student research at my university. It's the least he could do right? Put me on some pay. Did I mention he brought in a random undergraduate girl first to take the job, only to have her not show up for her first day? Regardless, I did not mind working for him because I needed the money, I was going for a publication, and I was in limbo between undergrad and grad school. He hired me a year ago, with the pretense that after a month of work part time (and volunteering half time so essentially working full time for half cost) he would assess whether to hire me full time. It's been a year and he hasn't taken any steps to hire me full time. I was ok with it because the half time volunteering was all in research for a publication in Nature Medicine, a prestigious journal in the medical community.

So now after a year, after bending over and taking all his shit up my ass. A year of wondering if I would ever get that full time pay. A year of constant criticism, and seemingly unending disapproval. I finally snapped. The previous week he had handed me the inventory logs for a -80 freezer in our lab. The shit was on printed out excel charts. The shit wasn't even on the computer. I should mention that the previous month I had spent converting his on-paper ordering database and moved it into a well organized access file. A week into organizing through hundreds of papers logging over 2,000 biological samples, using my computer ingenuity I converted the excel file into an access database, made filtered reports and printed them out for him. The first draft. I bring it to him, he points out all the mistakes and calls me incompetent and "untrustable" with this task. Fuck that, but I suck it up, take it away and fix the mistakes. He walks into the office two days later and asks to see the inventory. I had the mistakes fixed, yet somehow he manages to find one little detail that isn't a mistake, but doesn't fit his expectations. No good job, nothing, just criticism. I had enough I blew up on him. I told him that the previous 4 employees that left the lab on negative terms with him. Told him to find someone else to do the job, I had enough.

Being a spineless old fool, with a huge ego, he just laughs it off and thinks he's all in the right. I didn't show up to work today and tomorrow I have off because of the MCAT I am taking in the morning. I am writing this as a ways to vent all the frustration I have had built up in the last three years with this man. But also I really feel like sharing this experience with people because it is a huge contrast to the weekend I spent working at MLG at Anaheim.

Working at MLG Anaheim, I got paid pretty much the same rate, about 10 an hour. But the work environment is worlds different. People actually use the words "good job". I know, from a realistic perspective, working as ticket booth employee at a gaming convention for one weekend is pretty much a dead end unless you can apply yourself to other aspects of the event and climb up the ladder. Where-as working at a research lab as an aspiring physician, getting published in medical journals and eventually, with a bit of luck, making 6 figures. Obviously being a doctor is the better choice but now I am beginning to understand the flip side: sanity. Is my sanity and happiness really worth working in medicine? I mean, this job is just a tangent to everything that is to come. Applying to schools, the MCAT, and 4 more years of schooling with 2 years of residency (where you are everyone's bitch for 2 years) and over 100k in loans.

Sometimes I wish, I pray to God, that a miracle would happen and a door would open for me to change the path that I set 5 years ago in college. Can a 23 year old, with a B.S in biological sciences do something in the field of ESPORTS? I do not see why not. Bioware was founded upon a group of doctors who put down their practice to start a game developing company. I'll keep my eyes and ears open. Maybe something will come along for me.

Liquid'HerO fan for LIFE.
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
September 02 2011 04:04 GMT
#2
GL man. Sounds like a terrible boss, probably because he doesn't really care how bosses operate or is inspired by Bobby Kotick.
Gatsbi
Profile Joined April 2010
United States1134 Posts
September 02 2011 04:16 GMT
#3
wow Bioware was founded by doctors? didnt know that lol

anyways, good luck with your future man, I think you'll be fine. you sound like a smart dude. I think 6 years of hard work (and possibly insanity) is worth living a very comfortable life as a doctor.

Chin up champ.
"IF WHAT YOU DO NOT KNOW IS MORE THAN WHAT YOU HAVE KNOWN. THEN YOU HAVE NOT KNOWN ANYTHINIG YET." - Rev Kojo Smith
Hidden_MotiveS
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada2562 Posts
September 02 2011 04:29 GMT
#4
Should've waited for better IMO to begin with.
yourwhiteshadow
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States442 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-02 05:09:56
September 02 2011 05:05 GMT
#5
Life is full of frustrations and hard work only for the better things in life. I feel like you made the right decision to take a day off, gather your strength, and knock out the MCAT. Academia isn't the place to be in right now, and neither is industry. Research just flat out isn't the place to be in. There's a reason there is something like 50k-70k med school applicants a year. You don't even necessarily need his letter. So don't worry too much about it (although if you are aiming for research giant schools his letter is gonna be important considering you were there for 3 years).

Honestly, I've thought about this a lot too. I LOVE research, I've had some good mentors in the past who have been very awesome. I have one right now who's not amazing personality wise, but is quite the renowned scientist. I've been volunteering there for 8 months, getting tons of data, setting up $5000 equipment that even post-docs don't know how to set up. I still don't get the appreciation I deserve. As much as I'd hate to leave research, it basically comes down to the money.

I'm sure you know the status of post-docs these days. Do a 5-7 year PhD, do a 5-7 year post-doc, finally land your first tenure track position at 40 years old, and all the while earn a measly $40k a year. This is basically what it comes down to unfortunately. Would you rather graduate at 30 with no loans from a PhD, then proceed to make $40k a year (the pay doesn't change depending on city, its $40k in LA, NYC, Phoenix, Dallas, pretty much everywhere) or get trained with a license to practice medicine for $150k/year after you turn 30? Seriously, its not hard to make this decision. If you want to do research down the road, I'm pretty sure you can do both basic science and clinical research with an MD. However, with a PhD you're stuck with the same shitty pay. You pretty much can't start a family or anything ($40k for a family of 3 or 4 in LA or NYC? LOL).

I hate to break it to you, but all this frustration is not for naught. You're making the right decision. Your PI might be a dick, but you need to mend this, or at the very least not leave on bad terms (his letter could make or break your application).

Good luck, and if you wanna PM me, I'd love to chat (I'm in a similar situation).

Edit: dude holy shit, we're like twins. at first i skimmed your post, but now i read it in its entirety. seriously, i'm in the same situation as you. just move on, research is becoming the burger flipping of science. work 60 hr weeks, get 40 hr/week pay, don't profit?

Technical Director, Si Media Production, simediapro.com
yourwhiteshadow
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States442 Posts
September 02 2011 05:24 GMT
#6
On September 02 2011 13:29 Hidden_MotiveS wrote:
Should've waited for better IMO to begin with.


Not to sound like an asshole, but there really isn't anything better in science. The fact that you have a job in science is a miracle in itself.
Technical Director, Si Media Production, simediapro.com
TheGiz
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
Canada708 Posts
September 02 2011 16:19 GMT
#7
You're in sort of the same boat as my friend, as in he has a useless Medical Science degree and the best job he can get right now is serving tables at a restaurant.

You probably need more schooling, just like he does, otherwise your degree is basically worthless.
Life is not about making due with what you have; it's about finding out just how much you can achieve. Never settle for anything less than the best. - - - Read my blog!
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