|
On June 30 2011 13:18 Earll wrote:Show nested quote +On June 30 2011 13:12 Drinking Nestea wrote:Check out www.suicideforum.com - I posted there heaps when I was suicidal, it's kind of like how if you're into StarCraft you come to TL. Suicide forum is full of depressed people who share advice and experiences or just rant. If you post this same thread there you'll get heaps of detailed responses from people who read your posts in detail. Now I am no expert in being depressed, so I might be wrong here and this might be a good idea, but is it really a good idea, when suicidal\depressed, to hang about other people who are suicidal\depressed?
probably a bunch of people who used to be depressed in there too, who know what they're talking about and can offer good advice to the ones who are currently depressed.
|
On June 30 2011 11:42 MonsieurGrimm wrote:
I don't have much advice other than that you shouldn't break up with your boyfriend, that's something you'll definitely regret. there's nothing wrong with you though, you're not broken, you're just sort of.. stuck. but don't ever think there's something wrong with you and be hard on yourself for how you feel, a lot of people (more than you'd think) go through with this and feel the same way you do and even though you'll tell yourself it doesn't, it gets better.
definitely see the shrink at the end of july... until then, focus on other things you care about (don't focus on things you don't care about - and if you do care about it, consider whether you should care or not. not giving a fuck about anything means nothing can get you down, although it's also not that good an idea for other reasons). focus on your boyfriend, starcraft (assuming you play it), your work (if you enjoy it) - things that you can think about. and by thinking about it, I mean think about IT - for example, with starcraft don't think about your relation to it, rather just think about IT. same with your boyfriend, don't think "I'm too much of a burden on my boyfriend" (which is absoloutely not true). rather, talk to your boyfriend about what's up with him, what he's thinking, etc.
anyhow, you have the strength to get through this - don't ever think that you don't
EDIT: also don't listen to retard trolls, they're retarded.
a history of cutting wrists and being bipolar. how is that not broken?
but i agree that she needs to talk to a therapist.
|
On June 30 2011 13:41 MonsieurGrimm wrote:Show nested quote +On June 30 2011 13:18 Earll wrote:On June 30 2011 13:12 Drinking Nestea wrote:Check out www.suicideforum.com - I posted there heaps when I was suicidal, it's kind of like how if you're into StarCraft you come to TL. Suicide forum is full of depressed people who share advice and experiences or just rant. If you post this same thread there you'll get heaps of detailed responses from people who read your posts in detail. Now I am no expert in being depressed, so I might be wrong here and this might be a good idea, but is it really a good idea, when suicidal\depressed, to hang about other people who are suicidal\depressed? probably a bunch of people who used to be depressed in there too, who know what they're talking about and can offer good advice to the ones who are currently depressed.
Yea, things like that can act like a support group, to keep you from actually killing yourself.
Don't give up hope Meeran! It's always about taking that extra step, looking for the next fantastic opportunity that life could throw at you, (i realize that just sounds hopelessly optimistic, but it definitely goes a long way in keeping a positive outlook)
Just keep on the lookout for the job / hobby / thing that'll give you that spark that you'll love for the rest of your life.
Also, it's important to evaluate how you are with the bf, obviously you have strong feelings, so don't go rushing into something you'll regret later on because of how you're feeling right now
|
On June 30 2011 13:52 Golgotha wrote:Show nested quote +On June 30 2011 11:42 MonsieurGrimm wrote:
I don't have much advice other than that you shouldn't break up with your boyfriend, that's something you'll definitely regret. there's nothing wrong with you though, you're not broken, you're just sort of.. stuck. but don't ever think there's something wrong with you and be hard on yourself for how you feel, a lot of people (more than you'd think) go through with this and feel the same way you do and even though you'll tell yourself it doesn't, it gets better.
definitely see the shrink at the end of july... until then, focus on other things you care about (don't focus on things you don't care about - and if you do care about it, consider whether you should care or not. not giving a fuck about anything means nothing can get you down, although it's also not that good an idea for other reasons). focus on your boyfriend, starcraft (assuming you play it), your work (if you enjoy it) - things that you can think about. and by thinking about it, I mean think about IT - for example, with starcraft don't think about your relation to it, rather just think about IT. same with your boyfriend, don't think "I'm too much of a burden on my boyfriend" (which is absoloutely not true). rather, talk to your boyfriend about what's up with him, what he's thinking, etc.
anyhow, you have the strength to get through this - don't ever think that you don't
EDIT: also don't listen to retard trolls, they're retarded. a history of cutting wrists and being bipolar. how is that not broken? but i agree that she needs to talk to a therapist.
it's a problem but it's not like it's a problem with HER, it's a chemical imbalance in her brain and it's beyond her control. that's what I mean.
like, if you're an asshole to others, that's a problem with you. but depression isn't like that, I don't really want her to think "how did I let myself get/stay depressed, I've failed myself" or something like that because that's a ridiculous notion.
|
I want to stay sad.
So what is the purpose of this blog? Honestly, it sounds like your doing what you want. That is actually the only part of the blog where you say what you want, and the rest of it is so isolated and all about you that you don't even mention any real problems outside of teenage stuff that you just brush over. Based on the blog (and I'm guessing there is more you aren't saying, but based on the blog) it doesn't even seem like there is a problem. It seems like you are sad for no reason other than you want to be. So what are the real reasons?
|
I can relate to most of this. I have been majorly depressed since I've known what depression is, I wish tehre was just a button you can press that can kill yourself.
I have never had a SO though. =/
I don't have any advice. sry.
|
When it comes to your boyfriends, you didn't give much detail. However, for most people, they try to get things from relationships. If you are in a relationship to get certain things, the relationship will probably fail. Focus on what you can give your boyfriend. If you both develop a giving attitude, you will end up getting what you want from the relationship. When you focus on your relationship, instead of looking for whats wrong look for whats right. Be grateful for the wins in the relationship. When you are grateful for all the good things your boyfriend does for you and you get from the relationship and you share them with your boyfriend, your relationship will improve dramatically.
Your depression is caused by your attitude. Attitude is the composite of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. In order to change your attitude, you first much make some mental adjustments (aka change thoughts). When you change your thoughts your feelings and actions automatically change. The entire process of mental adjustment can be summed up in one word: Gratitude. If you become grateful for everything, your life will change enormously. When something bad happens, be grateful for it. It was a learning experience. It was essential to developing you into the person you are today. Gratitude is the opposite of fear. You cannot be grateful if you are fearful, and you cannot be fearful if you are grateful. Gratitude makes you fulfilled with your life.
Stop and think about all the things you have to be grateful for. When you develop a great feeling of gratitude deep within you, you will know you have altered your attitude. You can be grateful for the fact that you have a relationship, you can be grateful for your standard of living (Compare your standard of living to many people in third world countries), etc... Contact 6 people and tell them you are grateful for your friendship, and tell them why its important to you. This will help you form the habit of becoming grateful for everything. Think about gratitude for the next couple of days and formulate a habit of being grateful.
The last thing I would suggest is for you to figure out what you really want to do. If you feel like you are stuck there are two reasons why you are stuck:
a) You don't have a clear image of what you want
b) You are in a terror barrier. This means you are at the stage to do something but you are scared to do it. Practicing gratitude and making a decision to do the something will overcome the terror barrier.
In order to find out what you want you need to get into a relaxed state. This will allow you to employ your intellectual factor of imagination. The imagination is where creativity is expressed. This can be done by controlling your breathing and getting into a quite, peaceful physical place. Spend 10-15 minutes per day thinking. Come up with a clear image of what you really want. When you perform this exercise, do so under the assumption that anything is possible. Formulate an image of what you really want, and begin at once to work towards its attainment.
|
On June 30 2011 14:04 Treemonkeys wrote:So what is the purpose of this blog? Honestly, it sounds like your doing what you want. That is actually the only part of the blog where you say what you want, and the rest of it is so isolated and all about you that you don't even mention any real problems outside of teenage stuff that you just brush over. Based on the blog (and I'm guessing there is more you aren't saying, but based on the blog) it doesn't even seem like there is a problem. It seems like you are sad for no reason other than you want to be. So what are the real reasons?
That is just a cry for help, you want to stay sad because that is the only way you feel so you are accustom to being sad. It eventually feels "normal" to be sad when in reality it is some type of imbalance in the brain causing these feelings.
People who haven't felt depression are the same people in this thread who act like depression just goes away or you should just deal with it. Yes, she should deal with it by going to a therapist and then getting on an anti-depressant until she can talk about the actual problems that have been festering for over 5 years.
On June 30 2011 14:10 tryummm wrote:
When it comes to your boyfriends, you didn't give much detail. However, for most people, they try to get things from relationships. If you are in a relationship to get certain things, the relationship will probably fail. Focus on what you can give your boyfriend. If you both develop a giving attitude, you will end up getting what you want from the relationship. When you focus on your relationship, instead of looking for whats wrong look for whats right. Be grateful for the wins in the relationship. When you are grateful for all the good things your boyfriend does for you and you get from the relationship and you share them with your boyfriend, your relationship will improve dramatically.
Your depression is caused by your attitude. Attitude is the composite of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. In order to change your attitude, you first much make some mental adjustments (aka change thoughts). When you change your thoughts your feelings and actions automatically change. The entire process of mental adjustment can be summed up in one word: Gratitude. If you become grateful for everything, your life will change enormously. When something bad happens, be grateful for it. It was a learning experience. It was essential to developing you into the person you are today. Gratitude is the opposite of fear. You cannot be grateful if you are fearful, and you cannot be fearful if you are grateful. Gratitude makes you fulfilled with your life.
Stop and think about all the things you have to be grateful for. When you develop a great feeling of gratitude deep within you, you will know you have altered your attitude. You can be grateful for the fact that you have a relationship, you can be grateful for your standard of living (Compare your standard of living to many people in third world countries), etc... Contact 6 people and tell them you are grateful for your friendship, and tell them why its important to you. This will help you form the habit of becoming grateful for everything. Think about gratitude for the next couple of days and formulate a habit of being grateful.
The last thing I would suggest is for you to figure out what you really want to do. If you feel like you are stuck there are two reasons why you are stuck:
a) You don't have a clear image of what you want
b) You are in a terror barrier. This means you are at the stage to do something but you are scared to do it. Practicing gratitude and making a decision to do the something will overcome the terror barrier.
In order to find out what you want you need to get into a relaxed state. This will allow you to employ your intellectual factor of imagination. The imagination is where creativity is expressed. This can be done by controlling your breathing and getting into a quite, peaceful physical place. Spend 10-15 minutes per day thinking. Come up with a clear image of what you really want. When you perform this exercise, do so under the assumption that anything is possible. Formulate an image of what you really want, and begin at once to work towards its attainment.
None of this is actual good advice for someone who is depressed. If the OP was just lazy and unmotivated this might be decent advice, but with depression you don't just acquire passion by thinking about what you want to do. Doing "normal" everyday things are hard with depression, waking up and going to work, maintaining social relationships with people close to you...etc.
How do you know it is an attitude problem and not a chemical imbalance? This isn't just a 1 year short term problem, this has been going on for years. The OP needs therapy at the minimum if not medication to get back on track to who she used to be.
|
I think you need to sort this out for yourself, ranting may make you feel better momentarily but if this has been going on for years you need to commit to some serious introversion in my opinion.
|
On June 30 2011 14:26 Demonace34 wrote:Show nested quote +On June 30 2011 14:04 Treemonkeys wrote:I want to stay sad. So what is the purpose of this blog? Honestly, it sounds like your doing what you want. That is actually the only part of the blog where you say what you want, and the rest of it is so isolated and all about you that you don't even mention any real problems outside of teenage stuff that you just brush over. Based on the blog (and I'm guessing there is more you aren't saying, but based on the blog) it doesn't even seem like there is a problem. It seems like you are sad for no reason other than you want to be. So what are the real reasons? That is just a cry for help, you want to stay sad because that is the only way you feel so you are accustom to being sad. It eventually feels "normal" to be sad when in reality it is some type of imbalance in the brain causing these feelings. People who haven't felt depression are the same people in this thread who act like depression just goes away or you should just deal with it. Yes, she should deal with it by going to a therapist and then getting on an anti-depressant until she can talk about the actual problems that have been festering for over 5 years. Show nested quote +On June 30 2011 14:10 tryummm wrote:
When it comes to your boyfriends, you didn't give much detail. However, for most people, they try to get things from relationships. If you are in a relationship to get certain things, the relationship will probably fail. Focus on what you can give your boyfriend. If you both develop a giving attitude, you will end up getting what you want from the relationship. When you focus on your relationship, instead of looking for whats wrong look for whats right. Be grateful for the wins in the relationship. When you are grateful for all the good things your boyfriend does for you and you get from the relationship and you share them with your boyfriend, your relationship will improve dramatically.
Your depression is caused by your attitude. Attitude is the composite of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. In order to change your attitude, you first much make some mental adjustments (aka change thoughts). When you change your thoughts your feelings and actions automatically change. The entire process of mental adjustment can be summed up in one word: Gratitude. If you become grateful for everything, your life will change enormously. When something bad happens, be grateful for it. It was a learning experience. It was essential to developing you into the person you are today. Gratitude is the opposite of fear. You cannot be grateful if you are fearful, and you cannot be fearful if you are grateful. Gratitude makes you fulfilled with your life.
Stop and think about all the things you have to be grateful for. When you develop a great feeling of gratitude deep within you, you will know you have altered your attitude. You can be grateful for the fact that you have a relationship, you can be grateful for your standard of living (Compare your standard of living to many people in third world countries), etc... Contact 6 people and tell them you are grateful for your friendship, and tell them why its important to you. This will help you form the habit of becoming grateful for everything. Think about gratitude for the next couple of days and formulate a habit of being grateful.
The last thing I would suggest is for you to figure out what you really want to do. If you feel like you are stuck there are two reasons why you are stuck:
a) You don't have a clear image of what you want
b) You are in a terror barrier. This means you are at the stage to do something but you are scared to do it. Practicing gratitude and making a decision to do the something will overcome the terror barrier.
In order to find out what you want you need to get into a relaxed state. This will allow you to employ your intellectual factor of imagination. The imagination is where creativity is expressed. This can be done by controlling your breathing and getting into a quite, peaceful physical place. Spend 10-15 minutes per day thinking. Come up with a clear image of what you really want. When you perform this exercise, do so under the assumption that anything is possible. Formulate an image of what you really want, and begin at once to work towards its attainment. None of this is actual good advice for someone who is depressed. If the OP was just lazy and unmotivated this might be decent advice, but with depression you don't just acquire passion by thinking about what you want to do. Doing "normal" everyday things are hard with depression, waking up and going to work, maintaining social relationships with people close to you...etc. How do you know it is an attitude problem and not a chemical imbalance? This isn't just a 1 year short term problem, this has been going on for years. The OP needs therapy at the minimum if not medication to get back on track to who she used to be.
The problem is caused by a paradigm. When the OP sees a psychiatrist the psychiatrist will identify the paradigm them search for the cause of the paradigm. There really isn't any point in identifying the cause of paradigms, since you can change them without finding the cause. A paradigm is a multitude of habits. To change the paradigm, you need to replace habits. Ideally, you want to replace bad habits with good habits. Paradigms are what shape individuals logic and their actions. Its logical for people like Bill Gates to expect to earn millions a year whereas its logical for most people to expect to earn a few hundred thousand a year. The difference between Bill Gates and a person with an income of, lets say, $30,000 per year is a paradigm. Bill Gates operated on a prosperity consciousness paradigm and that controls Bill Gates attitude. Again, attitude is the composite of one's thoughts, feelings, and actions. Its logical for Bill Gates to think about earning millions. This causes Bill Gates to feel good about the idea of money, and thus he is acts on the idea and consequently makes a lot of money. A person living paycheck to paycheck on $30,000 per year basis their logic on expecting $30,000 per year. They typically have negative feelings towards money, and therefore don't act on ideas of increasing their income in a passive manner. Obviously, the OP isn't really talking about money...I just used it as an example to illustrate a point.
Its these paradigms that I explained that help formulate people's habitual way of thinking. How people think is what begins the cycle of attitude. Again, the OP habitually thinks about what is wrong. This isn't the OPs fault, its probably the way the OP's parents operated because its how the OP's grandparents operated, etc...The idea of focusing on the negative aspects of situations was passed down from one generation to another. Just like a paradigm of speaking English was provided to me because my parents and grandparents, etc...spoke English. If I was adopted into a Chinese family at birth I would have no knowledge of the English language and I would be fluent in Chinese. Now lets go back to the habits of thinking about negative ideas. Every situation is neither good nor bad, it just is. Its people's perception of a situation that makes it good or bad in their own consciousness. There cannot be a negative perception of something unless there is a positive. Similarly, you cannot have a hot without a cold or an up without a down. If the OP can alter her conditioned way of thinking from putting energy into negative perceptions of situations to thinking about positive perceptions of situations, the OP will change her attitude.
In order to understand how this works, you have to understand people don't think very often. A lot of people confuse mental activity with thinking. Mental activity is interacting with what you can see, hear, smell, taste, and touch. Mental activity isn't necessarily thinking. People typically operate based on habit. A habit is an idea that is fixated upon the subconscious mind. The subconscious is deductive, meaning it has no ability to think. People operate based on these habits without thinking. As an example, when you wake up in the mourning you might think about what you will put on...but you don't grab a shirt or a pair of shorts and say to yourself "I wonder how I'm going to put this on." When you were an infant, you probably had a lot of trouble dressing yourself. Once you developed the habit of dressing yourself it became automatic. It became programmed in the subconscious. In other words, it requires not thought. You get dressed without any thought.
That being said, lets discuss the OP again. The OP tends to focus on negative perceptions of various situations in her life. This happens habitually, without thought. If the OP uses the mental muscle of decision to consciously focus on a positive perception of various situations, her feelings and actions will be in alignment with positive thoughts. Through repetition the OP can change her habitual way of thinking from focusing on negative perceptions of situations to focusing on positive perceptions of situations. The positive emotions are desire, faith, love, sex, enthusiasm, romance, and hope. I recommended for the OP to figure out what she wants to employ the positive emotions of desire, faith, love, and enthusiasm. I used the mental muscle of gratitude as a catalyst to accomplish this. Its the thinking that needs to change for the OP to change. Its not a chemical contamination or some freak of nature that can only be fixed with pills that is causing the problems. If the OP decides to use pills, the pills will only treat the feelings that people call depression. The actual feelings of depression are a side effect. Since you are only treating a side effect, not the cause of the problem, the problem will persist when the pills wear off. The only way to fix the problem is by changing the cause of the problem, which is the OPs thinking. Again, the thinking is subconscious, the OP isn't intentionally thinking in this way. The thinking is a habit. The habit can be changed through conscious repetition of positive ideas.
Now let me conclude by saying, I am not against taking pills to treat the side effects for the short term. However, the pills will not change the thinking. The OP should consult a psychiatrist (Which I am under the assumption she will be doing next month). The psychiatrist may give her pills, but the psychiatrists main concern will be changing the thoughts. The pills won't fix the problem. They may be good to get rid of the feelings of depression short term, but ultimately the cause of the problem needs to change. Its thoughts that cause feelings, and feelings that cause actions. The reason the OP has been depressed for a long time is because the negative thoughts are habitual, and she has been habitually focusing on the negative for a long time.
|
Yeah, but the pills are there to make the negative thoughts go away so you can think clearly and then change your way of thought. For some people it is just a chemical imbalance and they clearly need serotonin pumped into their brain, other people have deep problems and the drugs are used as a way to open up a clear dialogue between the patient and the therapist. Either way, she needs to seek medical treatment first, then start reflecting once she is able to think non-suicidal and more focused.
Most people aren't able to just turn such bad habitual thinking into positive by thinking about how grateful they should be or how much worse off it could be. I thought in your previous post that you felt it was only her attitude that was the major problem and that it couldn't possibly be a multitude of factors.
Hope you seek medical treatment and are able to recover from your depression. Keep on keepin on.
|
Wish you emotional stability in the future and toughness 2 go trough.
Meeran fighting!
|
one thing i will say is... cutting is pretty commonplace these days. like, if u're not cutting for suicidal reasons but cutting just for that little bit of pain to give u an endorphin rush, i don't think that makes u crazy weird. I know a lot of chicks who used to do that
|
Stegosaur
Netherlands1231 Posts
Aren't you that chick that cheated on her awesome BF, with some guy you got to know in WoW, and he had to find out by reading MSN-logs?
If so, you are a horrible person and deserve all the depression that you get.
If not, sorry, carry on.
|
I'm reluctant to post this because it will probably get some hate but whatever.
I was depressed for several years without really realizing it, up until about a month ago. I had seen several therapists, tried anti-depressants etc. and nothing really helped, so I started to just accept it as my normal state of being.
About a month ago I tried psylocibin mushrooms for the first time (more commonly known as magic mushrooms or a variety of other names). That experience really opened my eyes to everything that was wrong with my lifestyle, and helped me to appreciate the beauty of the world around me. Since then, I've had the motivation to re-connect with my friends and start going out again, I've started exercising regularly and eating better (lost 5 pounds in the last 2 weeks ^_^) and I've also recently started meditating twice a day which has been amazing.
Basically I'm saying that one shroom trip saved my life, and I would recommend that experience to everyone.
|
I've gone through depressions aswell, probably still in one of them, What works for me is to occasionally take long walks to nature or some place which reminds you of what the world you're living in really is.
Don't be afraid to speak out to people who care for you.. They want to help you but it's incredibly hard to acces someone with an depression.
Another thing is running, or another sportive activity it's crucial that you at least get normal amounts of excersise.
Find structure in your life, a daily job/school enough time for hobbies, friends and sports (sports are in my opinion one of the most important things to feel better if you're depressed.
You can spend time alone but don't push people away just because you're feeling sad.
What can work for me too is to make sure you talk allot with people about your feelings but at the same time not focus much on them.. Like an objective look to your sadness.. In some time you'll figure out they can be beaten and you are a strong person.
First step is to talk to people you trust the most.. In order to get better you need help from the outside.
|
On June 30 2011 23:58 Shifft wrote:+ Show Spoiler +I'm reluctant to post this because it will probably get some hate but whatever.
I was depressed for several years without really realizing it, up until about a month ago. I had seen several therapists, tried anti-depressants etc. and nothing really helped, so I started to just accept it as my normal state of being.
About a month ago I tried psylocibin mushrooms for the first time (more commonly known as magic mushrooms or a variety of other names). That experience really opened my eyes to everything that was wrong with my lifestyle, and helped me to appreciate the beauty of the world around me. Since then, I've had the motivation to re-connect with my friends and start going out again, I've started exercising regularly and eating better (lost 5 pounds in the last 2 weeks ^_^) and I've also recently started meditating twice a day which has been amazing.
Basically I'm saying that one shroom trip saved my life, and I would recommend that experience to everyone.
I woulnd go for hard drugs.. Look at where the average junkie ends up.. Allot of those people had problems previously in their lifes don't suggests things like these just because they helped for you. They can do just as much damage as they can help.
|
On July 01 2011 05:14 Bojas wrote:Show nested quote +On June 30 2011 23:58 Shifft wrote:+ Show Spoiler +I'm reluctant to post this because it will probably get some hate but whatever.
I was depressed for several years without really realizing it, up until about a month ago. I had seen several therapists, tried anti-depressants etc. and nothing really helped, so I started to just accept it as my normal state of being.
About a month ago I tried psylocibin mushrooms for the first time (more commonly known as magic mushrooms or a variety of other names). That experience really opened my eyes to everything that was wrong with my lifestyle, and helped me to appreciate the beauty of the world around me. Since then, I've had the motivation to re-connect with my friends and start going out again, I've started exercising regularly and eating better (lost 5 pounds in the last 2 weeks ^_^) and I've also recently started meditating twice a day which has been amazing.
Basically I'm saying that one shroom trip saved my life, and I would recommend that experience to everyone. I woulnd go for hard drugs.. Look at where the average junkie ends up.. Allot of those people had problems previously in their lifes don't suggests things like these just because they helped for you. They can do just as much damage as they can help.
Mushrooms (and LSD for that matter) have no physically addictive chemicals in them and are less unhealthy for your body than cigarettes or alcohol. It's definitely not the same thing as doing cocaine/heroin/meth. Regardless, they can be quite mentally taxing so I would certainly advise reading up on their effects before trying anything.
|
You talk about the most active Substance on this Planet!
be careful with advice like this,cause
1.everybody reacts differently.
2.you can´t really say how much psylocibin is in the mushrooms!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Altough i for myself tested a lot of this stuff,including hawaian baby woodrose,Philosophers stones,etc..Its quite true that it can be one of the greatest moments in existense.
BUT! don´t do it alone!
Don´t do it in a mentally state that isn´t stable!
AND search advice from Mentors that you trust,BEFORE you take it!
|
seems like u just want attention.
|
|
|
|
|
|
EPT
