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How pathetic am I

Blogs > Jhuyt
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
Jhuyt
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Sweden365 Posts
June 20 2011 23:00 GMT
#1
So I just got to know that a girl which I have been trying too hook up with for the last 6 months have been seeing another guy. This made me bummed since I think she could have told me sooner but whatever.

The thing is that I have never had a relationship ever. And I'm 18 years old.

Seriously I haven't even had one of those fake ones you had when you were 12. And I have never been kissed. I feel pretty pathetic right now.

Though there is a silver lining to this, I can now stop thinking about what she thinks about me (she likes me btw, but saw the other guy before me).

If you would try to cheer me up I'd be gratefull.

The final thing I'd like to say is that I, since yesterday, have stopped watching MLP:FiM ironically and have become a real brony. That's not so bad huh?


**
[17:32] <catphone> Roll for % cooler [17:32] <catphone> .roll d20 [17:32] <+Sweetiebot> catphone: 20 (d20=20)
Megaliskuu
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States5123 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-20 23:05:29
June 20 2011 23:04 GMT
#2
Were u trying to "hook up" with her as in boning her or trying to get a relationship cuz the way ur saying it its like u want to bone her.

Anyway shit like this happens man, it could be far worse u could be at MLG with ur gf but ur gf ditches you and goes with the progamers and fucks around with them and then gets flown out to Europe for free all while u were supposed to be 2gether at mlg having a good time.

+ Show Spoiler +
I tried my best to do a baller impression but I'm just not witty enough HOT_BIDBALLER GET IN HERE AND SAVE THIS THREAD
|BW>Everything|Add me on star2 KR server TheMuTaL.675 for practice games :)|NEX clan| https://www.dotabuff.com/players/183104694
BrodiaQ
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
United States892 Posts
June 20 2011 23:04 GMT
#3
How pathetic are you on a scale of 1-10?

Probably a 3
And its entirely from this blog. Chin up, and now you know if you like a girl you have to go after her before someone else does.

Gl hf
"So come right up and let me squash your creativity with my iron fist of conservative play."--Nony
SirJolt
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
the Dagon Knight4012 Posts
June 20 2011 23:06 GMT
#4
I am sorry... I don't really understand that last part.

Are you suggesting that you have stopped watching My Little Pony altogether (and that this makes you less pathetic) or that you have stopped watching it "ironically" but still watch it and, as a result, you now feel yourself to be less pathetic?

Sorry if this is off topic, but I would appreciate the clarification.
Moderator@SirJolt
Jhuyt
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Sweden365 Posts
June 20 2011 23:10 GMT
#5
I watch MLP and that's awesome ^^. I mean that I have stopped watching it in an ironical (one or two ls?) way, now I enjoy the show.

And I was trying to have a relationship, one-night stands as such a strange concept to me.
[17:32] <catphone> Roll for % cooler [17:32] <catphone> .roll d20 [17:32] <+Sweetiebot> catphone: 20 (d20=20)
sc4k
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United Kingdom5454 Posts
June 20 2011 23:12 GMT
#6
most annoying situation ever dude!!!! Just gota accept dem apples and move on.
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
June 20 2011 23:13 GMT
#7
Wait. I don't understand, you feel pathetic because you haven't engaged in a certain aspect of your life at a relatively young age?

The sole view that that is pathetic, is probably the most pathetic. It comes at different times for different people, don't feel obligated or pressured to pursue something purely because of when you assume it is suppose to happen.

Some people don't engage in much of anything til their mid-twenties when they have less to focus on (schooling, family, sports, etc.).

No big deal.
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
Jhuyt
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Sweden365 Posts
June 20 2011 23:16 GMT
#8
On June 21 2011 08:13 Torte de Lini wrote:
Wait. I don't understand, you feel pathetic because you haven't engaged in a certain aspect of your life at a relatively young age?

The sole view that that is pathetic, is probably the most pathetic. It comes at different times for different people, don't feel obligated or pressured to pursue something purely because of when you assume it is suppose to happen.

Some people don't engage in much of anything til their mid-twenties when they have less to focus on (schooling, family, sports, etc.).

No big deal.


That was really inspiring, thanks (sincerely).
[17:32] <catphone> Roll for % cooler [17:32] <catphone> .roll d20 [17:32] <+Sweetiebot> catphone: 20 (d20=20)
ondik
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Czech Republic2908 Posts
June 20 2011 23:17 GMT
#9
Does she like you as a friend? Were you clear in showing you'd like to get past the friendzone? And don't worry, that's not pathetic. Yea, in movies you can see young nerds getting laid by the hottest girls in town and living happily ever after with them, reality is a bit different though. I'll be 23 and my best friend from high school, quite cool guy, had first serious (and sex) relationship only two years ago..and still is with the girl. No need to hurry or feel pressured.
Bisu. The one and only. // Save the cheerreaver, save the world (of SC2)
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
June 20 2011 23:17 GMT
#10
On June 21 2011 08:16 Jhuyt wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 21 2011 08:13 Torte de Lini wrote:
Wait. I don't understand, you feel pathetic because you haven't engaged in a certain aspect of your life at a relatively young age?

The sole view that that is pathetic, is probably the most pathetic. It comes at different times for different people, don't feel obligated or pressured to pursue something purely because of when you assume it is suppose to happen.

Some people don't engage in much of anything til their mid-twenties when they have less to focus on (schooling, family, sports, etc.).

No big deal.


That was really inspiring, thanks (sincerely).


Believe it or not, the other gender is only half of the world.
Enjoy your other half and if you find someone else, consider the fact that she's solely a part of your life to improve, not the driving goal to live.

Cheers~
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
Jhuyt
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Sweden365 Posts
June 20 2011 23:23 GMT
#11
Cheers mate
[17:32] <catphone> Roll for % cooler [17:32] <catphone> .roll d20 [17:32] <+Sweetiebot> catphone: 20 (d20=20)
braheem
Profile Joined March 2011
Canada81 Posts
June 20 2011 23:33 GMT
#12
On June 21 2011 08:16 Jhuyt wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 21 2011 08:13 Torte de Lini wrote:
Wait. I don't understand, you feel pathetic because you haven't engaged in a certain aspect of your life at a relatively young age?

The sole view that that is pathetic, is probably the most pathetic. It comes at different times for different people, don't feel obligated or pressured to pursue something purely because of when you assume it is suppose to happen.

Some people don't engage in much of anything til their mid-twenties when they have less to focus on (schooling, family, sports, etc.).

No big deal.


That was really inspiring, thanks (sincerely).



Torte pretty much hit the nail on the head, and I hope you took him very seriously.

Though you're in Sweden and I've never been there, I can tell you that many people think like you do in Western culture. A pretty common insult is "virgin", and teens that grow up take this pretty seriously. Don't succumb to whatever pressure you feel obligates you to engage in a relationship. I'm going to tell you one thing, enjoy your life while you're single. Companionship helps, but right now most people your age are still figuring out what the hell they want to do with their lives.


So, your 18, that makes you an adult in some legal aspects, but ultimately you're still a kid, and getting a girlfriend won't make you any more of a man.


It's important to stay single for a significant period of time in your life so that you can validate your existence without the attention of another person.

Keep doing what you're doing... and follow Jay Z's words of wisdom... "99 problems... but a bitch aint one" (didn't mean that offensively to women, lol).


I hate posses.
jlim
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Spain943 Posts
June 20 2011 23:48 GMT
#13
On June 21 2011 08:04 Megaliskuu wrote:
Were u trying to "hook up" with her as in boning her or trying to get a relationship cuz the way ur saying it its like u want to bone her.

Anyway shit like this happens man, it could be far worse u could be at MLG with ur gf but ur gf ditches you and goes with the progamers and fucks around with them and then gets flown out to Europe for free all while u were supposed to be 2gether at mlg having a good time.

+ Show Spoiler +
I tried my best to do a baller impression but I'm just not witty enough HOT_BIDBALLER GET IN HERE AND SAVE THIS THREAD


WINNER!

u might not be hotbid/baller, but you're good enough imo :D

to op... become a rapist. u gotta earn what u truly deserve. or u could also try to forget about her, bitches be bitches, specially when they're under 25. whatever happens, thinking of a girl who's already going out with another guy and which you'll never get to cheat on her bf with you is for pussies. become a forever pussy or move on, you're still young enough to find the right path.
FreezerJumps
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada653 Posts
June 21 2011 00:13 GMT
#14
I think your winning attitude and self-esteem intimidated her. Next time try to be super shy and self-defeating.
cojosc2
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States87 Posts
June 21 2011 00:32 GMT
#15

A pretty common insult is "virgin"

I got called a virgin because I wasn't able to hold off a baneling bust in a game of starcraft. lol.

I say that you just make her see that you're better. Its like business, he's Pepsi and you're Coke (I prefer Coke btw) you have to offer something new and fresh to get the consumers to drink you, OR you could walk away and find a new girl, OR you can just not worry about girls. My best friend has no desire to date and he is the happiest I've seen him. Its up to you what to do man. GL HF

obesechicken13
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States10467 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-21 01:20:54
June 21 2011 00:34 GMT
#16
On June 21 2011 09:13 FreezerJumps wrote:
I think your winning attitude and self-esteem intimidated her. Next time try to be super shy and self-defeating.

That's horrible advice! He should be himself or something...

On June 21 2011 08:13 Torte de Lini wrote:
Wait. I don't understand, you feel pathetic because you haven't engaged in a certain aspect of your life at a relatively young age?

The sole view that that is pathetic, is probably the most pathetic. It comes at different times for different people, don't feel obligated or pressured to pursue something purely because of when you assume it is suppose to happen.

Some people don't engage in much of anything til their mid-twenties when they have less to focus on (schooling, family, sports, etc.).

No big deal.

Yeah, but there's all sorts of pressure, like being called virgin by your friends, or your parents asking you every time if you have a girlfriend when they call you. I think my parent's nagging was getting to me.
I think in our modern age technology has evolved to become more addictive. The things that don't give us pleasure aren't used as much. Work was never meant to be fun, but doing it makes us happier in the long run.
ILOVEKITTENS
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
Korea (South)112 Posts
June 21 2011 00:44 GMT
#17
I know you were asking to be cheered up, but it is my belief that short term humor is cheap and wisdom for the unexperienced is priceless. So, I am going to cheer you up in the long-term by making it so this doesn't happen to you again.

You were "trying to hook up" with this girl, but she didn't tell you. This is due to one of 3 options:
  • She was playing you
  • She didn't know how to let you down easy
  • She didn't even know you were mackin' on her

It is my belief that it is the last point that is the most likely. It could be either of the other two, but there is not enough information to tell for sure, and even if there was - it's hard to trust second-hand retellings of how things came to be from a person who hasn't dated before. Not to sound rude, but it's generally accepted that people who don't have experience in a field tend to have a lot of misconceptions about it, or are easily misled. This is one of those cases, potentially. So, keep your mind open to all these possibilities, but we will focus on the last because it is the only one that you are in complete control of.

So, for 6 months, you were doing whatever you were doing to woo her. It didn't work - she probably didn't even notice it. What does that mean? It doesn't mean she isn't perceptive enough to your subtle approach. It means that your approach is too subtle. I think that when you say "I have been trying to hook up with her," means "I have been hanging out with her and looking on behind a wall of helplessness as I find myself unable to express my desires to her." Therein lies your problem. If she was truly earnest about "liking you" [sic] (we'll get into this later), then you just lacked the initiative to make things official and open. The best advice I can give you is that next time you need to dip your balls in liquid steel and then swing them around. Make her FEEL that you like her, and THEN tell her. If she doesn't bite, then fuck it, you at least tried. Now you have wasted 6 months of courtship for a "coulda woulda shoulda" situation, and are turning to a StarCraft forum to pick you back up. Not today, brother. Today is a new day. Today, you take the first step to having solid-steel balls. Today, on a scale of 0 to pathetic, you are a 0. Yesterday, maybe you were an 8.

Also, let us look into her statement of "liking you" [sic].
  • She lied, and wanted to let you down easy
  • She does like you, but as a friend
  • She does like you, period

Once again, all viable options. But, I think the second one is the most likely. If it was the first, she wouldn't have spent so much time with you out of pity - no one is that generous. If it was the last, she would dump her current boyfriend, because you don't tell people you like them while liking someone else more. So, you are officially friend-zoned. However! Instead of continuously going after this girl, waiting for her to break up with her BF, this gives you (like you said) freedom from any pressure, and the freedom to hone your woman-getting skills to a level beyond just spending time with them and watch them fall into the arms of another dude. So, get your confidence up, go woo some girls, which will give you more confidence, then when she dumps her toolbag boyfriend you will be super-you, ready to pick up the pieces and be her hero.

Good luck! FIGHTING!
obesechicken13
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States10467 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-21 01:24:01
June 21 2011 01:03 GMT
#18
On June 21 2011 09:44 ILOVEKITTENS wrote:
I know you were asking to be cheered up, but it is my belief that short term humor is cheap and wisdom for the unexperienced is priceless. So, I am going to cheer you up in the long-term by making it so this doesn't happen to you again.

You were "trying to hook up" with this girl, but she didn't tell you. This is due to one of 3 options:
  • She was playing you
  • She didn't know how to let you down easy
  • She didn't even know you were mackin' on her

It is my belief that it is the last point that is the most likely. It could be either of the other two, but there is not enough information to tell for sure, and even if there was - it's hard to trust second-hand retellings of how things came to be from a person who hasn't dated before. Not to sound rude, but it's generally accepted that people who don't have experience in a field tend to have a lot of misconceptions about it, or are easily misled. This is one of those cases, potentially. So, keep your mind open to all these possibilities, but we will focus on the last because it is the only one that you are in complete control of.

So, for 6 months, you were doing whatever you were doing to woo her. It didn't work - she probably didn't even notice it. What does that mean? It doesn't mean she isn't perceptive enough to your subtle approach. It means that your approach is too subtle. I think that when you say "I have been trying to hook up with her," means "I have been hanging out with her and looking on behind a wall of helplessness as I find myself unable to express my desires to her." Therein lies your problem. If she was truly earnest about "liking you" [sic] (we'll get into this later), then you just lacked the initiative to make things official and open. The best advice I can give you is that next time you need to dip your balls in liquid steel and then swing them around. Make her FEEL that you like her, and THEN tell her. If she doesn't bite, then fuck it, you at least tried. Now you have wasted 6 months of courtship for a "coulda woulda shoulda" situation, and are turning to a StarCraft forum to pick you back up. Not today, brother. Today is a new day. Today, you take the first step to having solid-steel balls. Today, on a scale of 0 to pathetic, you are a 0. Yesterday, maybe you were an 8.

Also, let us look into her statement of "liking you" [sic].
  • She lied, and wanted to let you down easy
  • She does like you, but as a friend
  • She does like you, period

Once again, all viable options. But, I think the second one is the most likely. If it was the first, she wouldn't have spent so much time with you out of pity - no one is that generous. If it was the last, she would dump her current boyfriend, because you don't tell people you like them while liking someone else more. So, you are officially friend-zoned. However! Instead of continuously going after this girl, waiting for her to break up with her BF, this gives you (like you said) freedom from any pressure, and the freedom to hone your woman-getting skills to a level beyond just spending time with them and watch them fall into the arms of another dude. So, get your confidence up, go woo some girls, which will give you more confidence, then when she dumps her toolbag boyfriend you will be super-you, ready to pick up the pieces and be her hero.

Good luck! FIGHTING!

ILOVEKITTENS posted a really honest and hurtful post.

I got really mad at him... so I kicked a kitten. Here's the proof.
[image loading]
I hope you are able to live with yourself for what you've made me do!


The first part is at least correct, for me; I don't really see the point of even thinking of getting with her now that she has a boyfriend. But I won't steal your blog, I think I'll finally make my own today.
I think in our modern age technology has evolved to become more addictive. The things that don't give us pleasure aren't used as much. Work was never meant to be fun, but doing it makes us happier in the long run.
munchmunch
Profile Joined October 2010
Canada789 Posts
June 21 2011 01:37 GMT
#19
On June 21 2011 09:44 ILOVEKITTENS wrote:
  • She was playing you
  • She didn't know how to let you down easy
  • She didn't even know you were mackin' on her

It is my belief that it is the last point that is the most likely.

Seconded. And the rest of the post is great advice as well.

Anyway, OP, stop worrying about when it's going to start happening with women. You're only 18, you are not as far behind as you think. None of the teenage stuff really compares to all the sex and relationship stuff that is going to happen to you in your twenties.
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
June 21 2011 01:51 GMT
#20
Man, why do we even have girl threads anymore? Just pm ILOVEKITTENS
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
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