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How I met my wife and why we got married- Part 2

Blogs > MightyAtom
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
MightyAtom
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
Korea (South)1897 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-04-01 05:04:08
February 20 2011 19:38 GMT
#1


****
Administrator-I am the universe- Morihei Ueshiba
Ilikestarcraft
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Korea (South)17726 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 20:12:54
February 20 2011 20:06 GMT
#2
like reading your blogs

Also the hanja in ilsan for the il isn't the one for the number one(한일一) but is the one for day (날일日). I remember that because I used to live in ilsan and for the longest time thought that it meant one mountain.
"Nana is a goddess. Or at very least, Nana is my goddess." - KazeHydra
MightyAtom
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
Korea (South)1897 Posts
February 20 2011 20:12 GMT
#3
On February 21 2011 05:06 Ilikestarcraft wrote:
like reading your blogs

Also the hanja in ilsan for the il isn't the one for the number one but means day 날일日. I remember that because I used to live in ilsan and for the longest time thought that it meant one mountain.


Really? hehe, I'm gonna check that, cause there are more than 1 mountains in islan too keke.
^^
Administrator-I am the universe- Morihei Ueshiba
Kalingingsong
Profile Joined September 2009
Canada633 Posts
February 20 2011 20:20 GMT
#4
Now you need to understand this one point, in Korea, we don't mix with different social classes, and the criteria for this is so minuet, so tiny, so inconsequently and so, when you see a Korean drama where an uber rich guy marries some beautiful poor girl that works in his company that he owns THAT NEVER EVER FUCKING EVER WILL NEVER EVER HAPPEN EVER. That rich dude, doesn't even know that that beautiful poor girl exists cause when he takes the elevator, the staff don't join him and he ain't at the office working all day and taking phone calls, no he at the Grand Hyatt having lunch and gonna take a flight to Jeju to do some golfing. And vise versa for the ladies as well. So my point was that while there maybe a lot of gold diggers out there in the world, these gold diggers in Korea would never ever get the time of day or have the social network to even run into a really well off guy. So in the same way, the girls that I was meeting, their parents are CEO of this or that company or are doctors, professors, lawyers etc. So it wasn't like for 1 second they thought that they needed to impress me, rather, that I needed to impress them. But since I'm not a golddigger either, its just blah...


hmm, any thoughts as to why the society turned out like this?
Dess.JadeFalcon
Tipany
Profile Joined November 2010
United States368 Posts
February 20 2011 20:38 GMT
#5
Brilliant.

I skipped to the middle when I decided that I NEEDED to read the whole thing, so I went back and read Part 1.

With 100% candor, I hope everything works out for the best in the end.
wat.
MightyAtom
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
Korea (South)1897 Posts
February 20 2011 20:41 GMT
#6
On February 21 2011 05:20 Kalingingsong wrote:
Show nested quote +
Now you need to understand this one point, in Korea, we don't mix with different social classes, and the criteria for this is so minuet, so tiny, so inconsequently and so, when you see a Korean drama where an uber rich guy marries some beautiful poor girl that works in his company that he owns THAT NEVER EVER FUCKING EVER WILL NEVER EVER HAPPEN EVER. That rich dude, doesn't even know that that beautiful poor girl exists cause when he takes the elevator, the staff don't join him and he ain't at the office working all day and taking phone calls, no he at the Grand Hyatt having lunch and gonna take a flight to Jeju to do some golfing. And vise versa for the ladies as well. So my point was that while there maybe a lot of gold diggers out there in the world, these gold diggers in Korea would never ever get the time of day or have the social network to even run into a really well off guy. So in the same way, the girls that I was meeting, their parents are CEO of this or that company or are doctors, professors, lawyers etc. So it wasn't like for 1 second they thought that they needed to impress me, rather, that I needed to impress them. But since I'm not a golddigger either, its just blah...


hmm, any thoughts as to why the society turned out like this?


couple of thoughts.
1. basically in the modern era after the 88 Olympics, much of the class system of the Joseon dynasty basically became irrelevant as there was this ungodly amount of mass of wealth made via gangnam real estate and chaebol companies really turning up the exports in all sectors. So there became a class system based purely on wealth with the chaebols on top and the new wealthy who had been lucky to buy the right plots of land in gangnam when it was just farm land or who bought the new houses in the areas and could sell it for 1000% of its value then rode the real estate boom and flipped more properties on top of that. A class system has been inherent part of Korean society in one form or another since the Shilla kingdom and thats plus 2000 years ago. Just because we are not as focused on the old class system doesn't mean that a new one hasn't formed. But the huge amount of insta wealth that occurred in such a short period of it totally changed the expression of classes.

2. the rapid industrialization in such a short period of time and in such a concentrated area (Seoul) has bred uber competitiveness, because there is no middle class identity. No one is proud to be middle class, everyone is trying to get out of being middle class because the signs of wealth are so apparent and obvious that it seems as though if you do x y z, then you as well can achieve the wealth that surrounds you. In america, the very rich areas are vastly separated from the very poor areas, someone in the ghettos will likely not even know a single road in a very rich neighborhood and even middle class people may never go into those neighborhoods, but in Korea, you run into celebrities and rich people all the time around you; today coming down from the mountain, we saw of of Korea's top directors, I didn't know who he was, but my wife and sister-in-law, were like, wow, its so and so. But the point is the rich are not far removed from sight. Now becoming chaebol rich is uber tough, near impossible, but going to a top school and becoming a professional is possible, so its this constant state of competition and comparing.


Couple this with this new class system based on wealth, with no formal guidelines, then you have this very materialistic uber competitive society system where only when everyone is of the same 'level' is there this relaxation of the strain of being competitive/comparing. But only if you are in the same level, if you below it, you strive to get in or go back down, if you are above it, you can't hang out with them because you set their envy aflame. It's not easy living in Korea. The ones outside this class system is probably the Christian population to some degree, but then they substitute the class system from simply associating with only other Christians.

Administrator-I am the universe- Morihei Ueshiba
MightyAtom
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
Korea (South)1897 Posts
February 20 2011 20:42 GMT
#7
On February 21 2011 05:38 TheJoyBringer wrote:
Brilliant.

I skipped to the middle when I decided that I NEEDED to read the whole thing, so I went back and read Part 1.

With 100% candor, I hope everything works out for the best in the end.


Thanks, much appreciated. ^^
Administrator-I am the universe- Morihei Ueshiba
ninini
Profile Joined June 2010
Sweden1204 Posts
February 20 2011 20:50 GMT
#8
lol, getting married sounds like a lot of (unneccessary) drama in Korea, but I was nodding my head when I read about your doubts about marrying her, and how you came to realize that you wanted to do it. I can tell that you had your priorities set straight, and that you made a wise choice.

I hope I can remember this valuable knowledge when it's time for me to get married.
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
February 20 2011 21:24 GMT
#9
I never want to live in Korea lol, I'm glad you love your wife though and that she stands beside you, you're a lucky man
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
fanta[Rn]
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
Japan2465 Posts
February 20 2011 21:38 GMT
#10
later on after we dated more, she told me she thought that my taste was way too conservative and was going to end the date there when we bought the ties lol!

hahaha, brillaint : D

Your wife is amazing, I can't believe how supportive she is. You gotta do it man!
Hynda
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Sweden2226 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 21:41:22
February 20 2011 21:40 GMT
#11
On February 21 2011 04:38 MightyAtom wrote:

The kind of woman you marry is the kind that will always do 3 things :

1. Always support you in public
2. Believe in you as a man who can provide for the family
3. Not put her personal need to want to be with you in front of your ambition and/or the family



I find it amazing just how different the cultures of this world can be. For me and the majority of my countrymen all those things you mention would be considered weak points for anyone you'd marry here.

Someone that would always support you in public would be seen as dull and with no opinions of her own.

Someone that would believe in the man providing for the family would be seen as unambitious and lazy, for many men a woman that can't provide for herself is unacceptable.

Someone that didn't voice her opinion if she felt the man is working to much and would need him to spend more time with her during some difficult time or more commonly the children would be seen as a very flat, whipped and unindependant woman.

And ofcourse there is no right or wrong here, I can respect most cultures virtues but it's fun to see how completly opposite some of them are.
Slayer91
Profile Joined February 2006
Ireland23335 Posts
February 20 2011 21:53 GMT
#12
Sick baller.
lungo
Profile Joined October 2005
Denmark276 Posts
February 20 2011 22:10 GMT
#13
wauw, thats the only thing i could think after reading all this
as Arnold said: you have been erased! but dont worry!
dahornnn
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United Kingdom395 Posts
February 20 2011 22:12 GMT
#14
your blogs are sick reads sir :D
gl with companies!
mooose
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Japan200 Posts
February 20 2011 22:27 GMT
#15
I always enjoy reading your blogs I hope your companies do well
www.teamyao.com @TeamYAO
MarCoon
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Germany493 Posts
February 20 2011 22:38 GMT
#16
Very nice story!

Are we gonna see part3 soon?
~follow me on twitter.com/GGmarCoon
vlaric
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States412 Posts
February 20 2011 23:06 GMT
#17
loved this blog series, 5/5 for sure
actually, just love all your blogs in general.
best of luck to you and your family on your business venture as well!


On February 21 2011 04:38 MightyAtom wrote:
<The Marrying Kind>
Megan is the kind of woman you marry and not the woman you date. Boys, there is a difference. If you are dating the kind of woman you will marry, then good for you, but if you are dating the kind of woman you only be dating, then do the right thing, don't marry her.

Now I'm not talking about marrying a virgin or good girl verse some girl who likes to party or whatever, that is just stupid shit.

The kind of woman you marry is the kind that will always do 3 things :

1. Always support you in public
2. Believe in you as a man who can provide for the family
3. Not put her personal need to want to be with you in front of your ambition and/or the family

Of course, this is just my view as a Korean man, but of course part of what makes this work as well is as a Korean man you work your freaking ass off and do whatever you can to provide the highest standard of living you can for your wife and family. And of course as humans there are limits.


when i was reading through this part, i remember my Korean friend giving me almost the exact same talk about the differences between the two types of girls (his brother has been dating the 'marrying kind' for awhile now).
is this common knowledge for relationships in Korean society? i was just wondering because the dialogues were so similar.
Wannabe zerg player
mizU
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States12125 Posts
February 20 2011 23:39 GMT
#18
Man, I didn't know blogs could be so intense.

Nice writing. This gives a different sense of Korea that I've been wanting to explore.
Thanks for writing.<3
if happy ever afters did exist <3 @watamizu_
Juliette
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States6003 Posts
February 20 2011 23:49 GMT
#19
mad respect :p. i wish you the best ^^
OKAY FROM THAT PERSPECTIVE I SEE WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT
29 fps
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States5724 Posts
February 21 2011 01:08 GMT
#20
you're a lucky guy. and your wife is lucky to have such a hardworking husband.

will there be a part 3?
4v4 is a battle of who has the better computer.
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