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On February 18 2011 14:54 YoureFired wrote: She returned the feelings. One of the biggest lies on earth. I had not 1 but 2 long distance relationships (first one was quite insignificant but it sucked). That thing sucked balls. The last one said similar things, but well. She didn't and doesn't even like me. Long distance relationships are as good as long distance mining. Too hard to maintain, too easy to get interrupted. Don't get into one unless you can move on with your life easily.
EDIT: I was 16 and 18 respectively in each of them.
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Not a good idea in my opinion. I don't see how a sexual relationship with a girl you have never met and only talked to online can possibly work, and I don't see why one would want a relationship like that.
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$190 = pretty cheap sex. if its good sex, then well, the money was worth it...
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On February 18 2011 14:54 YoureFired wrote:edit: I mean long distance relationships, sorry for the errors and if mods could change it that would be nice. Recently, this girl and I who met on a Counter Strike server (really random, I know) started talking a bit and suddenly it turned to who we liked. We'd been in touch for a while by this time, so I came up and straight up told her that she was the one who I liked. She returned the feelings. Lately, we've been talking more and more (don't worry, I won't go into detail) and I've been really eager to go out and meet her. I live in San Jose while she lives in Las Vegas, about an 8 hour drive or a $190 plane ticket. If I do go, there is a good chance I could lose my virginity to her. Is it crazy to think I could drive over for a weekend? I'm only 16 and a junior in high school right now, obviously this is different than if I was a crazy college student. I just want to know other people's experiences with things like this. Thanks, Team Liquid edit: quite a good post to make 500, i suppose.
Yeah, long distance dating is bad. If you end up living in the same city one day, then start dating, otherwise it's a major waste of time. (unless you were dating for a few years before the distance happened).
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It's probably a good idea to stop thinking with your penis. I definitely wouldn't do it, especially if you're 16. Pussy is everywhere, you don't have to go to Vegas to get your fix.
Also, no, the "worst" thing that can happen isn't losing 190 dollars. The worst thing is he goes over there and she turns out to work for a Russian sex-slave service and he gets pulled in and becomes a sex-slave worker himself.
Gotta think on your feet people.
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I have decided to wait a week to see what happens, but I'll probably have to cut it off. Thanks Team Liquid for bringing me a bit back to my senses.
Although I'd be happy if it somehow worked
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United States4796 Posts
Zero experience whatsoever, but I must say this is adorable! :D
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On February 18 2011 15:47 Fallen33 wrote: 7 hour drives are not short by any means. 7 hour drives is a shift at work nearly, think of how boring that will be. That will turn into insanity over time, and imagine if you fight while you're there? God forbid you have to drive 7 hours home, pissed off. It's not worth it. It's just one girl in a sea of billions. It's also like $80-$120 of gas round trip depending on how efficient your car is.
But personally I think you should meet up once if she's agreeable to that and you think it's worth it (as long as you are 100% confident she's genuinely who she says), just for the experience (not as in sex I mean but it's like a life experience), just to see for yourself. Not expecting a like consistent bf/gf thing to start because honestly, as people have said, it's just most likely not in the cards for now but who knows if you stay on good terms.
I personally have a close close online only female friend who I met on a forum so I can see where you are coming from. She thought it would be better not to meet irl, and I see where she's coming from on that even though I still would like to meet her, but we've been exchanging regular emails and private blog posts and such for 3 years now (I was 21 and she was 23 when we started, now I'm 24 and she's 26) and have a very deep connection and she's one of the most positive best parts of my life even though we are most likely never going to have a traditional relationship, and will be with other people and all that.
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I got pictures now. :O O: :O And NO, I can't share. So to the guy saying she didn't like me, definitely not that.
Glad to hear all of the different opinions, because I am definitely not going to be thinking rationally about this for a while.
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Also, another big factor is how attached to grow to a girl once you lose your virginity to her. I'm sure you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, but anyone here who lost their virginity consciously ( and not a drunken encounter) knows that once you lose your virginity to a girl you want to have sex with her every hour of the day for like 2 months.
And since she's not going to be around that's going to upset you even more and you'll be thinking even less rationally.
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I met my girlfriend when we both were 16 and I was in my last year in high school. I left for college 6 months later. I came back every weekend (Belgium is small, college is never THAT far away). It's hard work and at times it really sucks having to leave all the time. It weighs on you... After 5 years of college I came back, we moved in together and we're getting married in 4 months.
So it COULD work out but I have to admit, your story does not inspire much confidence :s Also: "If I do go, there is a good chance I could lose my virginity to her." is not really a motive to travel halfway across the country. There's plenty of opportunity for that later
I guess you could make a holiday out of it? I mean, she DOES live in Vegas? Although 16 is probably way too young for a "VEGAS BABY!" trip, right?
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Ah common, just go already, $190 for a once-in-a-while meeting can't hurt. You don't have much to lose.
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Go
Worst case senario, its a learning experience and a good one at that.
However rather than drive, I would look into a bus or something. 7 hours is a LOOOOONNNG drive. Its far better to be able to sit back and relax/play ds/sleep etc.
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If you can afford it without making desperate cuts into your budget, I'd say go for it.
I don't recommend LDR so don't go there with the mindset that you are creating a "for the long run"-relationship. Go there for a fun week/weekend with a good friend/crush. Have fun and see where it goes. Just be straight with her about your expectations and vice versa.
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On February 18 2011 17:06 YoureFired wrote: I got pictures now. :O O: :O And NO, I can't share. So to the guy saying she didn't like me, definitely not that.
Glad to hear all of the different opinions, because I am definitely not going to be thinking rationally about this for a while.
Simply, if she likes you and you her, if she is physically attracted to you and you her, and if she is serious about her intentions with you and you her, then go for it. There are infinitely worse ways to lose your virginity.
Many posts in this thread address the "true love" aspect of what you're saying, and if you are one of the few who actually find whatever it is that people call "true love" when they say "true love" at sixteen, you are exceedingly lucky. However, a substantial portion of sixteen-year-olds who have sex do so because they believe they are in love. This is not a contestable point.
If the money and time can be spent, go for it. If nothing else, you will learn something about Internet dating now, which will keep you from making rash and irresponsible decisions when you are older.
Just remember:
In Italy, for his own good, A wolf must wear a Riding Hood
Just replace "Italy" with "Las Vegas."
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LDR sucks for me. So normally I would say no.
But then I looked closer, you're only 16. Goddamn go for it dude! You have at least 10 years (imo) of trial and error before having to look for a serious relationship. Any experience in relationship at the moment makes you better. Yes that includes annoying PMS rant, finding out that your girl has been sleeping with your best friend, having sex during period, .etc
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Different things work for different people.
There's no reason NOT to go if you have the ways and means. Like jon said, why not?
My current girlfriend and I met online and we've been happy since. I don't know yet if she's "the one" and...well...why rush to find out? I have to laugh, though, I did a "mediocre distance relationship" (like 3 hours away - met via a mutual friend and hooked up) and it was shit. I think I learned a lot how to manage a LDR (Like... Seattle - Washington DC Long) from my shitty three-hour-away relationship.
I can't remember who said it but there's things that are really tough in a LDR - anyone who's been in the scenario have felt those nights where all you want to do is curl up with your girl and watch a movie or go out and do something together or whatever and then you realize...oh, hey, she's 3000+ Miles away.
You both have to be very trusting, very patient...the reason my first LDR failed was because the girl was always on my case.. "Oh, I have to work this weekend" - I visited her every other weekend, I LOVE my car and love driving so it was cool. - and she'd just flip. "Oh, you seeing someone else? It's THEIR weekend now?" and shit like that.
It's a good learning experience, at the very least
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Go visit her, have fun with her if you have the opportunity and see what develops. You won't be able to take any of the advice given in this thread until your hormones and endorphines settle down anyway, so you might as well go for it. You'll have plenty of time later to find out if you two will manage a relationship and if that's what you actually want.
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If you guys have talked about sex/had phone sex and you are 99% sure you will get laid go for it. If you have doubts, don't do it. You're only 16 and you should be able to find good pussy around you man, just work on it like you did with this girl.
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You know what - go for it. When I was 16, I did - and while didn't work out in the end, it wasn't so bad to deal with in the end. Kind of like having a practice relationship.
The tradeoffs of an online are: - Much less physical contact - Easier to fall apart if real life intervenes + Less maintenance + If it does go to crap, it's easier to deal with
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