• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 13:01
CEST 19:01
KST 02:01
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Serral wins HomeStory Cup 2914Serral wins Maestros of the Game 243ByuL, and the Limitations of Standard Play3Team Liquid Map Contest #22: Results and Winners7Code S Season 2 (2026): RO4 and Finals Preview12
Community News
Neeb returns to progaming; rejoins ONSYDE12Weekly Cups (July 20-26): Early returns on 5.0.16b8IntoTheTV X SOOP SC2 League : Weekly & Monthly4Clem: "I don't have that much hope in Blizzard"9ZeroSpace Early Access is Now Live!42
StarCraft 2
General
Clem: "I don't have that much hope in Blizzard" Neeb returns to progaming; rejoins ONSYDE Weekly Cups (July 20-26): Early returns on 5.0.16b Balance hotfix patch 5.0.16b (July 16) Terran or Protoss
Tourneys
RSL Revival: Season 6 - Qualifiers and Main Event PIG STY FESTIVAL 8.0! (13 - 23 August) Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament IntoTheTV X SOOP SC2 League : Weekly & Monthly INu's Battles#18 - Cure, herO, Rogue & ByuN
Strategy
[G] Having the right mentality to improve
Custom Maps
Nexus Wars 2021 GUIDE [M] (2) Industrial Park
External Content
Mutation # 536 Railroad Switch The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 535 Assembly of Vengeance Mutation # 534 Burning Evacuation
Brood War
General
BW General Discussion Making an Online Broodwar Manager Game ASL22 General Discussion screpdb: new Starcraft reporting tool ASL 22 Proposed Map Pool
Tourneys
2v2v2v2 Tournament [Megathread] Daily Proleagues Star Con San Diego 2026 Escore Tournament - Season 3
Strategy
Fighting Spirit mining rates Odyssey Mineral Stack Saturation Simple Questions, Simple Answers PvT advise for noobs
Other Games
General Games
Path of Exile ZeroSpace Early Access is Now Live! Nintendo Switch Thread Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread General RTS Discussion Thread
Dota 2
Looking for a Dota Mentor Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
TSM pausing esports and CLG Dead
Heroes of the Storm
Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Power Rank TL Mafia Community Thread NeO.D_StephenKing vs This Guy From 1 Million Dance
Community
General
Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Artificial Intelligence Thread US Politics Mega-thread European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread How to buy a book - shipping from Korea to Europe
Fan Clubs
The IdrA Fan Club The HerO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Anime Discussion Thread Movie Discussion! Series you have seen recently... [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread 2026-27 Football Thread placeholder TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 Formula 1 Discussion MLB/Baseball 2023
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread Simple Questions Simple Answers FPS when play League Of Legend on laptop
TL Community
Northern Ireland Global Starcraft The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Games, Hormones, and "Dark" …
TrAiDoS
Hello guys!
LIN1s
ASL S22 English Commentary…
namkraft
Poker (part 2)
Nebuchad
An Exploration of th…
waywardstrategy
ramps on octagon
StaticNine
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 21403 users

To have a kid that's not yours

Blogs > EtherealDeath
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
February 16 2011 03:37 GMT
#1
I've heard people say that having a child changes your perspective on many things and helps mature you - or rather, you're forced to mature. I don't know what that's like, and in a way I am grateful for that since I doubt I am ready for it.

Anyways, it is utterly curious to me that something like it has happened anyways. As you may or may not know, my apartment happens to hold 3 members of the UNC CSL team. But, there is also a 4th person. This person is of immense interest. We shall alternatively refer to him as Proberto, or otherwise as Roarby.

May this kvetching entertain you.

Ah Roarby, why are you always 2-5 weeks late on rent.
Ah Roarby, must you wail so loudly in anguish whilst playing poker during the early hours of the morning. Good thing letting you play poker for a bit on my desktop weened you off playing poker on your laptop!

Once upon a time, Proberto prepared to leave Aiur under direction and verbal agreement to take the trash to Char. Five minutes later, he indeed left Aiur, but without the trash.

Ah Roarby, it is a good thing that you think 60+ hours without showering might introduce a probability of showering being necessary. Alas, upon realization that you took a shower ~36 hours ago, you declare yourself of the utmost olfactory delight. Let's just forget the fact that over the same time period, no brushing of the teeth took place.

Ok, my format sucks. Last kvetch before returning to the whole having a kid theme - it is often super embarassing being near Roarby in public. You see, he absolutely loves the terms "boobies" and "boobie snacks". Yep, he says them all the time. Including in public, at restaurants, etc. He especially loves to use them when he feels that he is being a rapist, etc. In fact, empirically, it seems that "oh yea I'm a rapist" and "boobie snacks" are synonymous.

Oh, and before I forget. Once, he was like "what a nigger" about 3 feet in front of a group of african americans. Who were looking towards him at the time. And he was looking right at them in return. God save me from this T_T

Without getting into more private roarbies of Roarby, it feels like having a kid, except I didn't, and he's obviously not mine. Somehow we have a 20 year old with the mannerisms of a 5 year old mixed with half the mind of a 40 year old hentai. It's a curious mix.

tl;dr Halp I'm way too young for this shit.

p.s. This is a (hopefully) less shitty version of the kvetch a roommate of mine posted earlier

And... I just realized "this" is a permutation of "shit"

Basically, wtf halp how do you convince this guy he is fucking retarded and have him change to be less retarded.



****
Ushio
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Canada868 Posts
February 16 2011 04:00 GMT
#2
You can't really cure idiocy but you could tell him to clean up his act or get up. A 40 year old hentai? Uhh ok lol. You could always act like hes not there, but hes probably too obnoxious to do so. GL
http://myanimelist.net/profile/billng
nineninja9
Profile Joined March 2010
United States194 Posts
February 16 2011 04:02 GMT
#3
Pancakes are a polarizing subject.
Licmyobelisk
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Philippines3682 Posts
February 16 2011 04:02 GMT
#4
wow man just say it to his face that his a fucking retard.
I don't think I've ever wished my opponent good luck prior to a game. When I play, I play to win. I hope every opponent I ever have is cursed with fucking terrible luck. I hope they're stuck playing underneath a stepladder with a black cat in attendance a
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
February 16 2011 04:03 GMT
#5
Yea, he can be pretty obnoxious. For example, today after returning from not showering or brushing his teeth for at least 36 hours, I was like damn you smell like you need a shower.

His response? "Really?" At receiving yes for an answer, he comes up, starts flapping his arms up and down and goes "Oh yea I smell (I forget the adjective he used, but it was close to 'good' in meaning)"

And then he takes his shirt off and hangs it on the ceiling fan, and turns the fan on wtf retarded.
FragKrag
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States11567 Posts
February 16 2011 04:05 GMT
#6
lol what

thats fucking insane
*TL CJ Entusman #40* "like scissors does anything to paper except MAKE IT MORE NUMEROUS" -paper
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
February 16 2011 04:05 GMT
#7
On February 16 2011 13:02 Licmyobelisk wrote:
wow man just say it to his face that his a fucking retard.


I have many times lol. His response is always something synonymous (to him) with "Oh yea I'm a rapist" or "boobie snacks". Reminds me of that character in The Twelve Chairs who comically has a vocabulary of 30 words.
dcberkeley
Profile Joined July 2009
Canada844 Posts
February 16 2011 04:06 GMT
#8
Your writing style is peculiar.
Moktira is da bomb
Lemonwalrus
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States5465 Posts
February 16 2011 04:06 GMT
#9
wtf is a kvetch?
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
February 16 2011 04:08 GMT
#10
On February 16 2011 13:06 Lemonwalrus wrote:
wtf is a kvetch?


Slang derived from Yiddish which means to complain. Or alternatively, a person who complains.
Wolf
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Korea (South)3290 Posts
February 16 2011 04:09 GMT
#11
Get a new roommate. Threaten to kick him out of things don't change. Do it politely. Ask for a meeting of all roommates, talk about issues, and then let him know what's going on.

If you're at a University, either you're screwed, or maybe you can talk to some administration if it's THAT bad.
Commentatorhttp://twitter.com/proxywolf
TL+ Member
nineninja9
Profile Joined March 2010
United States194 Posts
February 16 2011 04:12 GMT
#12
There is no way you could willingly agree to room with him and not see this coming.
reincremate
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
China2216 Posts
February 16 2011 04:13 GMT
#13
I think most of us have heard of (or had) this kind of worthless roommate at some before, but your description was still entertaining.
Grobyc
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada18410 Posts
February 16 2011 04:14 GMT
#14
On February 16 2011 13:12 nineninja9 wrote:
There is no way you could willingly agree to room with him and not see this coming.

Yeah this came to mind too haha
If you watch Godzilla backwards it's about a benevolent lizard who helps rebuild a city and then moonwalks into the ocean.
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
February 16 2011 04:17 GMT
#15
On February 16 2011 13:14 Grobyc wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 16 2011 13:12 nineninja9 wrote:
There is no way you could willingly agree to room with him and not see this coming.

Yeah this came to mind too haha


Somehow neither myself nor my other 2 roommates saw this coming. We were simply looking for a one year replacement for a roommate who went off to Russia for the year :/
Empyrean
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
17070 Posts
February 16 2011 04:20 GMT
#16
This has nothing to do with your blog post, but what the shit is Team Empyrean?
Moderator
Lemonwalrus
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States5465 Posts
February 16 2011 04:21 GMT
#17
The site is right in his sig, copy paste that shit bro
thehorsebecomesking
Profile Joined February 2011
189 Posts
February 16 2011 04:22 GMT
#18
thought this was about getting together with a woman that already has a child. im upset
Empyrean
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
17070 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-16 04:25:39
February 16 2011 04:24 GMT
#19
On February 16 2011 13:21 Lemonwalrus wrote:
The site is right in his sig, copy paste that shit bro


I did, and I was horribly confused >_>

EDIT: I only wish they had better website design/layout <_<
Moderator
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
February 16 2011 04:24 GMT
#20
On February 16 2011 13:20 Empyrean wrote:
This has nothing to do with your blog post, but what the shit is Team Empyrean?


We are your fan team Yue

Just another team Although, I did think holy shit Empyrean made his own team at first.
1 2 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Patches Events
17:00
Patch Clash #9
Reynor vs Solar
ByuN vs TBD
RotterdaM87
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
ByuN 582
mouzHeroMarine 99
RotterdaM 87
ProTech69
StarCraft: Brood War
Britney 27508
Calm 5994
EffOrt 921
Soma 433
Soulkey 393
Shuttle 354
BeSt 262
Rush 221
Snow 200
Dewaltoss 127
[ Show more ]
hero 89
Sharp 71
Hyun 66
Killer 50
Sexy 45
ToSsGirL 36
Terrorterran 22
IntoTheRainbow 10
Mong 1
Dota 2
Gorgc6823
qojqva1427
League of Legends
Trikslyr46
Counter-Strike
fl0m4297
x6flipin1200
Other Games
FrodaN2678
singsing1602
Mlord642
B2W.Neo395
Beastyqt390
ToD282
XaKoH 100
QueenE62
MindelVK24
Chillindude15
Organizations
StarCraft 2
WardiTV786
TaKeTV 271
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
[ Show 18 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Shameless 19
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• sooper7s
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• Migwel
• intothetv
• LaughNgamezSOOP
StarCraft: Brood War
• Pr0nogo 4
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
• BSLYoutube
Dota 2
• C_a_k_e 3271
• WagamamaTV510
League of Legends
• Nemesis3622
• TFBlade669
Other Games
• Shiphtur291
• imaqtpie1
Upcoming Events
OSC
29m
Replay Cast
6h 59m
Escore
16h 59m
CrankTV Team League
17h 59m
Big Brain Bouts
22h 59m
Spirit vs sOs
GgMaChine vs Percival
Serral vs MaxPax
OSC
1d 5h
Replay Cast
1d 6h
Afreeca Starleague
1d 10h
RSL Revival
1d 15h
ByuN vs SHIN
Solar vs Lambo
WardiTV Summer Champion…
1d 17h
[ Show More ]
Afreeca Starleague
2 days
RSL Revival
2 days
Clem vs Serral
herO vs Rogue
WardiTV Summer Champion…
2 days
WardiTV Weekly
3 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
4 days
PiGosaur Cup
5 days
Replay Cast
5 days
Kung Fu Cup
5 days
Replay Cast
6 days
The PondCast
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2026-07-29
SCTL 2026 Spring
Eternal Conflict S2 Finale

Ongoing

CSL 2026 Summer (S21)
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 3
RSL Revival: Season 6
CranK Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League
BLAST Bounty Summer 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer Qual
Stake Ranked Episode 3
XSE Pro League 2026
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026

Upcoming

Escore Tournament S3: W5
ASL Season 22: Qualifier #1
ASL Season 22: Qualifier #2
Acropolis #5
Escore Tournament S3: W6
Escore Tournament S3: W7
Escore Tournament S3: W8
HSC XXX
SC4ALL II: StarCraft II
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
PiG Sty Festival 8.0
Light Tournament 2026
ESL Pro League Season 24
Stake Ranked Episode 4
Logitech G Connect 2026
SL StarSeries Fall 2026
FISSURE Playground #5
BLAST Open Fall 2026
Esports World Cup 2026
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.