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My Dad is Manlier Than Your Dad

Blogs > AirbladeOrange
Post a Reply
AirbladeOrange
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States2573 Posts
January 15 2011 07:30 GMT
#1
To celebrate the 37th anniversary of my dad getting discharged from the navy I decided to write a blog making fun of him.

When looking at my dad one will probably first notice how short he is at five feet five inches high. Then, because he is so short, the rapidly receding hairline becomes all the more obvious to a person of equal or greater hight. After noticing the shortness and baldness one will probably greet him and immediately pay attention to the gap between his two front teeth when he opens his mouth to greet them back. By this time it may become more obvious just how hairy he is in odd places, such as his hands, nose, the back of his neck, and ears. While looking around for patches of strangely located hair one must take note that his legs are very short compared to his torso and also quite skinny. And if someone is really looking for physical abnormalities, it might become apparent that his feet are rather short and also wider than one would expect. I often rip on my dad for all those qualities I have mentioned, but I also view him as the manliest man I have ever known.

Usually when people think of manliness they tend to think of guys who are muscular, intelligent, fearless, handsome, and confident, among other qualities. This is probably due to the media telling young boys who they should grow up to try to be. Even to this day, whenever I watch Predator with Arnold Schwarzenegger I feel like that is the epitome of masculinity. His entire squad of equally tough guys is hunted and killed by an advanced alien who can cloak and shoot lasers. Arnold rescues the girl and fights the alien with brawn, as well as wits, to ultimately come out the victor.

Although I would argue until I die with anyone who does not think Arnold is an awesome and manly specimen in Predator, when I think more about the topic of masculinity I prioritize completely different traits than those possessed by the seven time Mr. Olympia champion body builder in the movie. And I have realized that all of the important traits of being manly I have learned from my dad. Possibly the most important of these is taking care of your family by any means necessary. This is something my dad always does but never speaks about. He is also a man who always selflessly gives his time to not only his family, but his friends as well. He is so generous with helping a neighbor shovel their driveway in the winter, as well as jumping into a bar fight to help out a friend who pissed off the wrong guy. My dad is resilient when times are tough, whether this is a financial matter, family problem, or fulfilling a duty he deems important. One of the first major commitments to duty he ever experienced was when he was drafted to fight in the navy during the Vietnam War. Many of his peers faked some sort of physical, mental, or emotional illness to avoid the war, or even fled to Canada. My dad just went and served as he was supposed to choosing not to be a defiant teenager as many other people did during the time. I imagine getting shipped off as a teenager to go fight in a war hundreds of miles away from home and doing all sorts of things you have never done before was probably some scary shit. But the most amazing thing to me about my dad is how different he is from his dad. Many guys grow up to be just like their fathers whether they mean to or not. It just seems to be part of the whole nature versus nurture argument with nurture usually coming out on top. My grandpa deserted his family shortly after my dad was born, only to return again seven years later after figuring he wanted to ditch the girl he was running around with and try again to settle down with his wife and kids. Even after he came back he wasn't the warmest dad around. At least to me, my dad has never showed anger toward his father for any of the less-than-fatherlike things he had done throughout his life. I'm fairly certain that my dad learned a few good things about being a man from his father, but probably learned more of what a man should not be like. Either way, I can't help but be thankful for both the negative and positive experiences by dad went through to make him the man he is today so that he could show me by example what the true definition of masculinity is.

Afterword:
Possibly the manliest thing about my dad is his lack of a middle name. His father did not have a middle name and did not believe in giving his kids middle names. My dad has exactly the same name as his father, and he is not considered a junior or a second. That is unusual for America and at least moderately badass.

***
Yogurt
Profile Blog Joined June 2005
United States4258 Posts
January 15 2011 10:10 GMT
#2
AirbladeOrange casts Wall of text. Critical hit. Super effective.

User was warned for this post
ok dont not so good something is something ok ok ok gogogo
Spec
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Taiwan931 Posts
January 16 2011 05:57 GMT
#3
My Dad is no father figure QQ
Eye for an eye make the world go blind - Gandhi
Licmyobelisk
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Philippines3682 Posts
January 16 2011 06:27 GMT
#4
still my dad is way more hippier than your dad! you have a great dad though
I don't think I've ever wished my opponent good luck prior to a game. When I play, I play to win. I hope every opponent I ever have is cursed with fucking terrible luck. I hope they're stuck playing underneath a stepladder with a black cat in attendance a
FuDDx *
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
United States5008 Posts
January 16 2011 07:14 GMT
#5
Your dad seems fairly manly but I have to go with my dad over yours any day...... Pics




[image loading]
[image loading]
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Balloon-Man-FuDD/237447769616965?ref=hl
Jstor
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States107 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-01-16 07:19:56
January 16 2011 07:18 GMT
#6
On January 16 2011 16:14 FuDDx wrote:
Your dad seems fairly manly but I have to go with my dad over yours any day...... Pics




[image loading]


The Undertaker sure was manly back in his American Badass days...
TadH
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada1846 Posts
January 16 2011 07:41 GMT
#7
On January 16 2011 16:14 FuDDx wrote:
[image loading]



Kinda looks like the guy from mythbusters,
Shana
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Indonesia1814 Posts
January 16 2011 08:12 GMT
#8
On January 16 2011 16:14 FuDDx wrote:
Your dad seems fairly manly but I have to go with my dad over yours any day...... Pics




[image loading]
[image loading]


what a baller dad
Believing in what lies ahead. | That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet.
AirbladeOrange
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States2573 Posts
January 16 2011 18:25 GMT
#9
On January 16 2011 16:14 FuDDx wrote:
Your dad seems fairly manly but I have to go with my dad over yours any day...... Pics




+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]
[image loading]


Please cast your dad in a badass action movie with Danny Trejo and Jet Li.
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