Thread title says it all. I am 18 and I have no idea what I want to do in the future, no sense of direction in life, and I'm pretty depressed conciousness-wise because of this. For the past several years, I have always felt this way and I found a damaging outlet through the internet, which did me more harm then good. I feel like i've always followed whatever my parents/school etc told or forced me to do and I never had any "real experience" whereas everyone else I know has a sense of purpose and coherence in their lives. To clarify, I never really did make my own authentic judgements and put myself to do something genuinely fun, creative, and joyful as most people around my age group have, until now. I've started to lose interest in Starcraft, I mean I don't get the same pleasure that I used to get when I watched vods unless it's big games where guys like Flash and Jaedong are involved and moreso when Flash and Jaedong are losing. I mean i'm losing interest in games, because I feel its just not productive and it's keeping me from doing things that would help me more.
The worst feeling is that so much time has been wasted and went away and I did nothing about it. None of this would have been happened if I knew who I really was, and had a general hint of what I wanted in life; its something that I'm just starting to discover. I should have "reached out" and risked things and formed some sort of identity but I missed the grandiose of my teenage years because I have/had so many issues with family and all sorts of crap that i've feel as though I have been trapped. There is too much stress in my life right now that would drive any ordinary person insane, it's such a burden and it's kept me from becoming my own person. But I guess you just have to move on with life, play the cards you are dealt with and all that crap. I tried to find something to distract me and it was really just escapism. I haven't been able to figure out my true core strengths, and a general hint of what i am really good at. If I at least get a gist then I could do something meaningful.
I recently started getting interested into Neuroscience, behavioral-economics, decision-making, heuristics, art and technology, design. I read two very good books, books everyone on this entire planet HAS TO READ. One was called the Black-swan by Nassim Nicholas Taleb, which completely changed how I viewed the world and changed me as a person as well. The other book that I read was called the "Brain that changes itself" by Norman Doidge which had the exact same effect albeit greater and nudged me into those fields. I am however very horrible when it comes to chemistry and I am not so good at math, even though I really appreciate the aesthetics of it. Now, I am not sure if this is what I would love to do or if I will have any success doing those things. Another thing that I am really good at is drawing, I feel I am good enough that I can make a living off it but it's a skill that has been pretty much dormant for a long time and something I just haven't honed and strengthened; because like any other natural talent that just isn't seen as important or worthy in eyes of useless institutions and parents, its given a stamping out. I also want to get out of the U.S and go see the rest of the world and meet people I wouldn't normally meet; the three countries that I most want to gain exposure and possibly live in, is Brazil, Russia, and China. I feel as though these three countries are going to play a huge role in the future and I am curious about the places, the cultures, and the people that reside there. But I am not sure if this will ever end up happening or if it's really a good thing for myself.
So how did you/do you find out what you love to do that is productive, gives meaning and find some sense of direction in life? Any advice, reflections, observations, suggestions about what I should do, what I can do in this confusing phase in life?
Honestly this used to happen to me. I'd play video games/somethign the whole day and then be angry/depressed at night realizing I hadn't done anything. And of course I'm going to give you the cheesiest answer that while cheesy gave me motivation in life. I'm sure it's different for many others but here it goes. + Show Spoiler +
this question came up a lot when i played Protoss because Protoss was my best race but not my favorite. I just move on with this answer "Try Everything" actually, i hated Protoss.
Don't worry about it. Relax. Explore life. Ignore people that try to tell you 18 years old is when you should know what you want to do. It's bullshit. That's just what society arbitrarily decided is the time you should be able to enter the workforce.
It's as arbitrary as 18 for smoking, guns, and 21 for alcohol. These numbers mean nothing. They're merely lines that society has drawn in the sand. And honestly, plenty of intelligent people don't figure out what they want to do in life until they're 40. It's not a big deal. Journey not the destination. Good luck and have fun.
On July 03 2010 12:43 Muirhead wrote: Find some girl and tell her you want to be her sex slave. Let her decide your life for you.
Bad Idea. Ignore this person! Be your own man.
If your life feels unfulfilled, that's because you feel unhappy with yourself. You feel as if you haven't made enough of an impact on the world. I know I felt really angry/sad with myself because I wanted to be remembered when I died, I just thought all the time of how noone would remember me when I was gone.
You gotta find yourself. Find yourself, be content, be kind, stay humble, and you will feel at peace.
Don't take this the wrong way, what I mean is that 99% of us felt/feel the same way. Like that Nike commercial says, "Just do it", do everything.
I figured after college there would be no more studying, so I focused on WHERE to work. After narrowing it down to 12-14 places I called people and asked if they would let me watch what their job was like (Every single one said yes). Problem was solved as soon as I entered the construction site =p
I have often felt the same way. However, you should find what interests you at the moment and pursue it with hard work and determination. When you go to college and other things are more interesting then put your heart into that too. If you keep thinking about how directionless you are you wont find direction. You have to put in effort and see what happens.
You contradict yourself, describing yourself as without identity and grandiose moments but then claiming to have gone through family difficulties and endured stress that "normal" people couldn't. You don't have to have your whole life figured out at 18. I'm not sure you should ever have it figured out completely, and most of those other teenagers who talk as though they know exactly who they are and what they are going to do for the rest of their lives are just naive. They will have something completely different planned in like 2-3 years.
If you want to travel, then do. I personally have found it very rewarding and can tell you that China and Brazil in particular are almost complete opposites, but both amazing (China is also much safer and cheaper). It is easier to get out in the world and explore than most people seem to feel. There are many exchange programs and internships that can get you abroad. Also, I've been told there is demand for English speakers to teach English even if they don't know the local language. Travel in general is both much easier and much more rewarding if you aren't high strung and are willing to avoid pricey hotels/restaurants.
I should probably say that I personally have little direction and no clue of what I want to do for a living (am currently working on a phd in theoretical physics just because I think it is interesting), and I'm perfectly content with that. One of the absolute simplest ways to get more reward out of life is to just pick something you think is cool or interesting and go learn it. To this end, I've gone and learned a bunch of skills, none of which I am all that great at, but all of which are rewarding to experience. Try choosing something for the summer, just sort of picking up a new hobby.
My father always advised me to read biographies, because then I would be learning the wisdom of the most successful people's entire lives. I've found this to be good advice. Maybe I can't figure what I want to do from someone else's life, at least I can learn and get a taste from it.
Something else I love doing is watching graduation speeches. The best I've found so far is Steve Jobs:
Another good one is Randy Pausch's "Last Lecture":
Hope this helps. I'm still looking, and I'm almost 27.
18 is still a very young age, there are still lots of opportunities out there in the world waiting for you! If you're headed off to college, that's definitely a place to really find out your passions are in life. I was like you, just following the daily routines of life and not sure what to do. Thankfully though, I was able to find my absolute passion in life early, which was theatre tech [during my third year of high school].
I'd say....step out of your comfort zone and try everything that life has to offer you to see what sparks your interest, even if it is a bit discomforting. You might be able to find a field that you love to the point where it changes your whole goals for life (for me, it changed from being generic asian doctor/engineer to working on Broadway in NY someday)
Learn from the past, live in the present, prepare for the future :C. Best of luck
I'm 18. I haven't even tried to plan out my life. I'm going to college in the fall, and I guess I'll decide in the next four years. Currently, my plan is approximately, "Make shitloads of money!!!!" because apparently that makes life easier.
Yeah, for now, I'm still chilling. 18 is not an age to worry about this kind of stuff. I still don't feel 18, though. It sounds so old. In my mind, I'm probably 11.
dont make the mistake of confusing finding an identity that makes you fit into society well with finding your own identity. i think you have found "yourself" already, but noticed that what you know society offers is not enough for you to go after it like your life depended on it. dont let anybody force you into something. also, reading books and seeking answers to such questions is a good thing to do. but the fact of the matter is that the lower your standards are, the easier you are satisfied. it means that the simple mind is happier than the sceptical, doubting, asking, seeking one. asking too many questions will make your life and finding a place in society harder, not easier.
Didn't respond in time, but again thanks for all the feedback guys!! At least alot of you were mature about it and didn't have kee-jerk reactions like the other (but similar) topics or forums where there are an excessive amount of ignorant/unhelpful/immature comments
EPT
