• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EST 05:22
CET 11:22
KST 19:22
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
RSL Revival - 2025 Season Finals Preview8RSL Season 3 - Playoffs Preview0RSL Season 3 - RO16 Groups C & D Preview0RSL Season 3 - RO16 Groups A & B Preview2TL.net Map Contest #21: Winners12
Community News
Weekly Cups (Jan 5-11): Clem wins big offline, Trigger upsets0$21,000 Rongyi Cup Season 3 announced (Jan 22-Feb 7)12Weekly Cups (Dec 29-Jan 4): Protoss rolls, 2v2 returns7[BSL21] Non-Korean Championship - Starts Jan 103SC2 All-Star Invitational: Jan 17-1822
StarCraft 2
General
SC2 Spotted on the EWC 2026 list? Weekly Cups (Jan 5-11): Clem wins big offline, Trigger upsets Weekly Cups (Dec 29-Jan 4): Protoss rolls, 2v2 returns Spontaneous hotkey change zerg Chinese SC2 server to reopen; live all-star event in Hangzhou
Tourneys
$25,000 Streamerzone StarCraft Pro Series announced $21,000 Rongyi Cup Season 3 announced (Jan 22-Feb 7) WardiTV Winter Cup WardiTV Mondays SC2 AI Tournament 2026
Strategy
Simple Questions Simple Answers
Custom Maps
Map Editor closed ?
External Content
Mutation # 508 Violent Night Mutation # 507 Well Trained Mutation # 506 Warp Zone Mutation # 505 Rise From Ashes
Brood War
General
Potential ASL qualifier breakthroughs? BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ BW General Discussion StarCraft & BroodWar Campaign Speedrun Quest Data analysis on 70 million replays
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [BSL21] Grand Finals - Sunday 21:00 CET [BSL21] Non-Korean Championship - Starts Jan 10 SLON Grand Finals – Season 2
Strategy
Game Theory for Starcraft Simple Questions, Simple Answers Current Meta [G] How to get started on ladder as a new Z player
Other Games
General Games
Beyond All Reason Nintendo Switch Thread Awesome Games Done Quick 2026! Mechabellum Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Vanilla Mini Mafia Mafia Game Mode Feedback/Ideas
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine Trading/Investing Thread
Fan Clubs
White-Ra Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
Anime Discussion Thread
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List TL+ Announced
Blogs
My 2025 Magic: The Gathering…
DARKING
Physical Exercise (HIIT) Bef…
TrAiDoS
Life Update and thoughts.
FuDDx
How do archons sleep?
8882
James Bond movies ranking - pa…
Topin
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 1217 users

Attempt at thinly veiled worst brag blog ever.

Blogs > DivinO
Post a Reply
1 2 3 Next All
DivinO
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States4796 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-04-09 01:16:24
April 09 2010 01:15 GMT
#1
All of this isn't true:

Here goes nothing.


So today was basically the most annoying day ever. I wake up to my girlfriend bitching at me on the phone. She's been doing this on and off for about a week now. After that much bitching how could I forget I had to go pick up my fucking Porsche at the dealership today?

After hanging up on her (but not before she promised me a night in bed) I went off to my classes. And it was rainy. Rainy as usual. That's the one thing I really fucking hate about Yale. I get water splashed all over my Armani Exchange Jeans as I run hurriedly to class.

After listening to my professor rant on for four hours about Eigenvectors he pulls me over for 15 fucking minutes to rant about how well I did on my test and how I should consider a work study over the summer. Not once does it occur to him in this period of 15 minutes that I have shit to do.

So I say goodbye to the professor and catch a bus down to the dealership. The stupid redhead can't stop flirting with me. Makes me feel like a zoo animal, or her dinner, or anything else that distracts me from getting the damn car. Eventually after dealing with her I get the car running and drive back down to my place. Of course when I sit down at my computer PokerStars is down. It's such a fucking drag when you win 250 grand the night before and can't even withdraw it because the site is down.

I pop down to the girlfriend's place in the Porsche and before I even get out of the car she wants me to take her for a ride somewhere. Of course the dumb bitch doesn't realize I'm hungry and it's time for dinner. After four hours of class and two hours of some dumb dealership chick eyefucking you you could really use a sandwich. But of course not, she wants to see how the car runs.

After some senseless driving (because gas is totally free) we sit down and she makes dinner. After dinner we watched a movie, and then got into bed.

Someone teach her how to give a blowjob. Seriously.

So I snuck out after she fell asleep, and got home, and here I am typing this shit. Just wanted some sympathy.

Thanks TeamLiquid.

**
LiquipediaBrain in my filth.
Pokebunny
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States10654 Posts
April 09 2010 01:18 GMT
#2
Is this supposed to be funny? It really isn't lol
Semipro Terran player | Pokebunny#1710 | twitter.com/Pokebunny | twitch.tv/Pokebunny | facebook.com/PokebunnySC
baller
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
527 Posts
April 09 2010 01:18 GMT
#3
don't quit ur day job to become a comedy writer
koreasilver
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
9109 Posts
April 09 2010 01:19 GMT
#4
[image loading]
Khenra
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Netherlands885 Posts
April 09 2010 01:19 GMT
#5
Well, I for one think this is brilliant.
This signature is ruining eSports.
petzergling
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
538 Posts
April 09 2010 01:20 GMT
#6
what stakes do you play
Mod Edit: Don't bold your entire post
ZeeTemplar
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
United States557 Posts
April 09 2010 01:21 GMT
#7
Needs more cowbell.
Jangbi storms!!!
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
April 09 2010 01:22 GMT
#8
I giggled
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
GeMicles
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
Canada307 Posts
April 09 2010 01:23 GMT
#9
yale... nice
i pikachu in the shower
jalstar
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
United States8198 Posts
April 09 2010 01:23 GMT
#10
this is hilarious
Kwidowmaker
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Canada978 Posts
April 09 2010 01:23 GMT
#11
I liked it but your title should have been in character. It was obvious enough at the test part
Kk.
NurseArial
Profile Joined March 2010
Belarus109 Posts
April 09 2010 01:26 GMT
#12
Nice try, but no one would really brag about shopping at Armani Exchange.
da_head
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Canada3350 Posts
April 09 2010 01:27 GMT
#13
u forgot mentioning an sc 2 beta key somewhere. if you don't have one, then all of that is meaningless and you've wasted my time.
When they see MC Probe, all the ladies disrobe.
DivinO
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States4796 Posts
April 09 2010 01:27 GMT
#14
Wanted it to be obvious......I guess I killed the point of it by announcing that it was real...

Wasn't so much going for laughs as I was for reactions..but I guess I messed that up real quick.
LiquipediaBrain in my filth.
HeadhunteR
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Argentina1258 Posts
April 09 2010 01:31 GMT
#15
how can this be a brag blog this seriously needs more cowbell
in The Kong line forever
Rekrul
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
Korea (South)17174 Posts
April 09 2010 01:32 GMT
#16
On April 09 2010 10:26 NurseArial wrote:
Nice try, but no one would really brag about shopping at Armani Exchange.


LOLOL u beat me to it...armani exchange? come on dude
why so 진지해?
[NyC]HoBbes
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States803 Posts
April 09 2010 01:34 GMT
#17
armani collezioni, yes. armani exchange, not in a million years
Where'er you walk cool gales shall fan the glade
Comeh
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States18919 Posts
April 09 2010 01:37 GMT
#18
Remove the disclaimer from the top and 5/5.
so fucking true.
ヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノDELETE ICEFROGヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(⌐■_■)ノヽ(
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26782 Posts
April 09 2010 01:47 GMT
#19
Lolol.
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
deth
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Australia1757 Posts
April 09 2010 01:51 GMT
#20
Great dry humor, not bad satire right there 5/5
1 2 3 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 1h 38m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
SortOf 104
StarCraft: Brood War
Sea 4607
Rain 1940
Horang2 912
Shuttle 674
Mini 446
Larva 446
Hyuk 372
Stork 355
actioN 292
ZerO 259
[ Show more ]
Leta 231
Mong 183
Soma 147
Zeus 135
EffOrt 132
Hyun 98
Nal_rA 97
Rush 76
Killer 75
910 75
ggaemo 72
JulyZerg 60
hero 46
Light 40
Sharp 39
zelot 35
Mind 32
Terrorterran 21
Sexy 20
Free 20
soO 15
scan(afreeca) 15
ajuk12(nOOB) 13
Noble 12
Bale 10
Sacsri 10
Dota 2
XcaliburYe102
NeuroSwarm98
ODPixel85
League of Legends
JimRising 460
C9.Mang0385
Counter-Strike
olofmeister1604
shoxiejesuss944
allub245
Super Smash Bros
Mew2King110
Other Games
summit1g7388
ceh9574
Pyrionflax257
Fuzer 156
ZerO(Twitch)10
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick2965
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 14 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• iopq 4
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Jankos2075
• Lourlo1241
• Stunt543
Upcoming Events
WardiTV Invitational
1h 38m
PiGosaur Cup
14h 38m
WardiTV Invitational
1d 1h
The PondCast
1d 23h
OSC
2 days
OSC
3 days
All Star Teams
3 days
INnoVation vs soO
sOs vs Scarlett
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
4 days
All Star Teams
4 days
MMA vs DongRaeGu
Rogue vs Oliveira
Sparkling Tuna Cup
4 days
[ Show More ]
OSC
5 days
Replay Cast
5 days
Wardi Open
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2026-01-12
Big Gabe Cup #3
NA Kuram Kup

Ongoing

C-Race Season 1
IPSL Winter 2025-26
BSL 21 Non-Korean Championship
CSL 2025 WINTER (S19)
OSC Championship Season 13
Underdog Cup #3
BLAST Bounty Winter Qual
eXTREMESLAND 2025
SL Budapest Major 2025
ESL Impact League Season 8
BLAST Rivals Fall 2025
IEM Chengdu 2025
PGL Masters Bucharest 2025

Upcoming

Escore Tournament S1: W4
Acropolis #4
IPSL Spring 2026
Bellum Gens Elite Stara Zagora 2026
HSC XXVIII
Rongyi Cup S3
Thunderfire SC2 All-star 2025
Nations Cup 2026
BLAST Open Spring 2026
ESL Pro League Season 23
ESL Pro League Season 23
PGL Cluj-Napoca 2026
IEM Kraków 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.