Life in Soviet Russia

Vladimir Stalvernisky waited. Oil lamps above head blinked and sparked out of air. Capitalist pigs were in base. He did not see them, but they were there. Capitalist pigs should be expected everywhere. Warnings to KGB officer Josonsky not listened to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.

Vladimir was Kosmonaut soldier for fourteen years. When small, he watched rockets and said to father "Comrade father, I want to be on rockets."

Comrade father say, "NYET! You will be kill by Capitalist pig-dogs!"

He believed him when small. Then older Vladimir stopped. But now in glorious Mir space station base he knew were Capitalists.

"Josonsky here", phone line crackered. "Kill Capitalist pigs!"

Vladimir get palsma rifle and blow up wall section.

"He kill us all!" Capitalist pigs shout.

"I kill him!" Cybercapitalist pig say and fire rocket. Vladimir plasma him and try kill him. Then ceiling section implode and trap them so they could not kill.

"NYET!!!! Must kill Capitalist pigs!" he shouted.

Radio say, "Nyet, Vladimir. You are the Capitalist pigs."

And then Vladimir was a Fascist.