And it hurt. My eyes watered; I cried.

It look like 5 minutes to push it out, and it was definitely 12+ inches. It was so big that the first end was feeding itself down the toilet pipe when I was still pushing out the other half. It was one of the most painful experiences of my life. I think I now know what it's like to give birth to a child. I probably tore myself a new one in the process. I'm scared TL. I checked the toilet once I finally got up and it must have sunk down the pipe because it disappeared when I stood up. I knew the chances of clogging the toilet were going to go up if I wiped and added toilet paper, so I flushed first but IT STILL FUCKING CLOGGED. My toilet is clogged and I went at it for like 10 minutes with the plunger but I can't fix it. I think it's stuck in one of the pipes angles/turns beneath the toilet. I hope we don't have to call in a plumber.

My ass hurts so much it's unreal. I've never cried while taking a shit before.

P.S. I did wipe after, but had dispose of it elsewhere.

Grobyc

Canada18410 Posts

September 18 2009 03:40 GMT

Quite frankly, I have no clue why I'm sharing this. I'm extremely bored.

I do feel a lot lighter now though.

koreasilver

9109 Posts

September 18 2009 03:42 GMT

This is a thread for the bookmarks.

ilovejonn

Canada2548 Posts

September 18 2009 03:42 GMT

so did you fix it yet. or do you have to call Mario?

emperorchampion

Canada9496 Posts

September 18 2009 03:44 GMT

On September 18 2009 12:42 ilovejonn wrote:
so did you fix it yet. or do you have to call Mario?

rofl

edit for posterity: http://pbfcomics.com/?cid=PBF213-Mario_Too.jpg

edit2: Canada unite

EscPlan9

United States2777 Posts

September 18 2009 03:46 GMT

lol
this is so hard to not laugh at, and my gf is trying to sleep...

i've had a couple similar experiences. none this epic though

lmao

Ftrunkz

Australia2474 Posts

September 18 2009 03:48 GMT

the thread title alone made me chuckle. 5/5 for sure

GogoKodo

Canada1785 Posts

September 18 2009 03:49 GMT

How many Courics do you think it was?

Musoeun

United States4324 Posts

September 18 2009 03:49 GMT

So the question is, will this end up in the PX under 'Best of Blogs' or 'The Shit Bus'?

Licmyobelisk

Philippines3682 Posts

September 18 2009 03:52 GMT

#10

Wow man, that has gotta hurt.. I remember having a deuce so thick when I was a kid that I had to get newspaper just for the sake of pulling it out.. I suggest eating a lot of fiber from now on because it really helps in making em big shit look like little shits.

Chef

10810 Posts

September 18 2009 03:52 GMT

#11

Man, I just took the biggest crap... Like, I didn't measure its dimensions or anything, but I think I'd compare it to the experience a woman has after giving birth, when it dawns on her that a human being just came out of her body.

SanguineToss

Canada815 Posts

September 18 2009 03:53 GMT

#12

On September 18 2009 12:40 Grobyc wrote:

P.S. I did wipe after, but had dispose of it elsewhere.

This sounds like wiping your ass after a shit isnt habitual

DanceCommander

United States1808 Posts

September 18 2009 03:53 GMT

#13

lololol it has to be on the shit bus, its too easy.

Athos

United States2484 Posts

September 18 2009 03:53 GMT

#14

Enrique

United States377 Posts

September 18 2009 03:53 GMT

#15

On September 18 2009 12:49 Musoeun wrote:
So the question is, will this end up in the PX under 'Best of Blogs' or 'The Shit Bus'?

I think it might just set a precedent and be under both. At least I hope it will.

All I have to add to this mighty blog is a hearty congrats. That's tough work, and I'm proud of you for toughing it out (not that you had a choice... and little to no pun intended).