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Active: 499 users

I just dropped the biggest douce of my life

Blogs > Grobyc
Post a Reply
1 2 3 4 Next All
Grobyc
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada18410 Posts
September 18 2009 03:40 GMT
#1
And it hurt. My eyes watered; I cried.

It look like 5 minutes to push it out, and it was definitely 12+ inches. It was so big that the first end was feeding itself down the toilet pipe when I was still pushing out the other half. It was one of the most painful experiences of my life. I think I now know what it's like to give birth to a child. I probably tore myself a new one in the process. I'm scared TL. I checked the toilet once I finally got up and it must have sunk down the pipe because it disappeared when I stood up. I knew the chances of clogging the toilet were going to go up if I wiped and added toilet paper, so I flushed first but IT STILL FUCKING CLOGGED. My toilet is clogged and I went at it for like 10 minutes with the plunger but I can't fix it. I think it's stuck in one of the pipes angles/turns beneath the toilet. I hope we don't have to call in a plumber.

My ass hurts so much it's unreal. I've never cried while taking a shit before.

P.S. I did wipe after, but had dispose of it elsewhere.

****
If you watch Godzilla backwards it's about a benevolent lizard who helps rebuild a city and then moonwalks into the ocean.
Grobyc
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada18410 Posts
September 18 2009 03:40 GMT
#2
Quite frankly, I have no clue why I'm sharing this. I'm extremely bored.

I do feel a lot lighter now though.
If you watch Godzilla backwards it's about a benevolent lizard who helps rebuild a city and then moonwalks into the ocean.
koreasilver
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
9109 Posts
September 18 2009 03:42 GMT
#3
This is a thread for the bookmarks.
ilovejonn
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Canada2548 Posts
September 18 2009 03:42 GMT
#4
so did you fix it yet. or do you have to call Mario?
Snowflakes in January, Heart warm like February, I wouldn't ordinarily..
emperorchampion
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Canada9496 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-09-18 03:48:19
September 18 2009 03:44 GMT
#5
On September 18 2009 12:42 ilovejonn wrote:
so did you fix it yet. or do you have to call Mario?

rofl

edit for posterity: http://pbfcomics.com/?cid=PBF213-Mario_Too.jpg

edit2: Canada unite
TRUEESPORTS || your days as a respected member of team liquid are over
EscPlan9
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
United States2777 Posts
September 18 2009 03:46 GMT
#6
lol
this is so hard to not laugh at, and my gf is trying to sleep...

i've had a couple similar experiences. none this epic though

lmao
Undefeated TL Tecmo Super Bowl League Champion
Ftrunkz
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Australia2474 Posts
September 18 2009 03:48 GMT
#7
the thread title alone made me chuckle. 5/5 for sure
@NvPinder on twitter | Member of Gamecom Nv | http://www.clan-ta.com | http://www.youtube.com/user/ftrunkz | http://www.twitchtv.com/xghpinder
GogoKodo
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Canada1785 Posts
September 18 2009 03:49 GMT
#8
How many Courics do you think it was?
twitter: @terrancem
Musoeun
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States4324 Posts
September 18 2009 03:49 GMT
#9
So the question is, will this end up in the PX under 'Best of Blogs' or 'The Shit Bus'?
Don't Shoot the Penguins. | Dance, 성은, dance! | Killer FanKlub | Action sucks. | Storm Terran hwaiting.
Licmyobelisk
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Philippines3682 Posts
September 18 2009 03:52 GMT
#10
Wow man, that has gotta hurt.. I remember having a deuce so thick when I was a kid that I had to get newspaper just for the sake of pulling it out.. I suggest eating a lot of fiber from now on because it really helps in making em big shit look like little shits.
I don't think I've ever wished my opponent good luck prior to a game. When I play, I play to win. I hope every opponent I ever have is cursed with fucking terrible luck. I hope they're stuck playing underneath a stepladder with a black cat in attendance a
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
September 18 2009 03:52 GMT
#11
Man, I just took the biggest crap... Like, I didn't measure its dimensions or anything, but I think I'd compare it to the experience a woman has after giving birth, when it dawns on her that a human being just came out of her body.
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
SanguineToss
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada815 Posts
September 18 2009 03:53 GMT
#12
On September 18 2009 12:40 Grobyc wrote:


P.S. I did wipe after, but had dispose of it elsewhere.


This sounds like wiping your ass after a shit isnt habitual
DanceCommander
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States1808 Posts
September 18 2009 03:53 GMT
#13
lololol it has to be on the shit bus, its too easy.
Athos
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
United States2484 Posts
September 18 2009 03:53 GMT
#14
[image loading]
Enrique
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States377 Posts
September 18 2009 03:53 GMT
#15
On September 18 2009 12:49 Musoeun wrote:
So the question is, will this end up in the PX under 'Best of Blogs' or 'The Shit Bus'?


I think it might just set a precedent and be under both. At least I hope it will.

All I have to add to this mighty blog is a hearty congrats. That's tough work, and I'm proud of you for toughing it out (not that you had a choice... and little to no pun intended).
~Inter Arma Enim Silent Leges~
Grobyc
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada18410 Posts
September 18 2009 03:55 GMT
#16
On September 18 2009 12:53 SanguineToss wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 18 2009 12:40 Grobyc wrote:


P.S. I did wipe after, but had dispose of it elsewhere.


This sounds like wiping your ass after a shit isnt habitual

because I didn't want to add to the possibility of clogging the toilet. I threw it in the waste basket instead :S
If you watch Godzilla backwards it's about a benevolent lizard who helps rebuild a city and then moonwalks into the ocean.
Pengu1n
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States552 Posts
September 18 2009 03:57 GMT
#17
12+ inches huh....? you know this means you are capable of taking a 12 inch cock up the ass. congrats!!
SanguineToss
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada815 Posts
September 18 2009 03:59 GMT
#18
On September 18 2009 12:57 Pengu1n wrote:
12+ inches huh....? you know this means you are capable of taking a 12 inch cock up the ass. congrats!!


lulz
Empyrean
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
16981 Posts
September 18 2009 04:00 GMT
#19
Who calls it a douce?

O_O

...

...

...

...ewwwwwwww.
Moderator
A3iL3r0n
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
United States2196 Posts
September 18 2009 04:02 GMT
#20
pics or it didn't happen
My psychiatrist says I have deep-seated Ragneuroses :(
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