• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EST 06:02
CET 12:02
KST 20:02
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Behind the Blue - Team Liquid History Book15Clem wins HomeStory Cup 289HomeStory Cup 28 - Info & Preview13Rongyi Cup S3 - Preview & Info8herO wins SC2 All-Star Invitational14
Community News
ACS replaced by "ASL Season Open" - Starts 21/0218LiuLi Cup: 2025 Grand Finals (Feb 10-16)23Weekly Cups (Feb 2-8): Classic, Solar, MaxPax win2Nexon's StarCraft game could be FPS, led by UMS maker10PIG STY FESTIVAL 7.0! (19 Feb - 1 Mar)13
StarCraft 2
General
How do you think the 5.0.15 balance patch (Oct 2025) for StarCraft II has affected the game? Nexon's StarCraft game could be FPS, led by UMS maker Terran Scanner Sweep Behind the Blue - Team Liquid History Book Weekly Cups (Jan 12-18): herO, MaxPax, Solar win
Tourneys
RSL Season 4 announced for March-April LiuLi Cup: 2025 Grand Finals (Feb 10-16) PIG STY FESTIVAL 7.0! (19 Feb - 1 Mar) RSL Revival: Season 4 Korea Qualifier (Feb 14) Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament
Strategy
Custom Maps
Map Editor closed ? [A] Starcraft Sound Mod
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 512 Overclocked Mutation # 511 Temple of Rebirth Mutation # 510 Safety Violation
Brood War
General
StarCraft player reflex TE scores [ASL21] Potential Map Candidates Gypsy to Korea Which units you wish saw more use in the game? ACS replaced by "ASL Season Open" - Starts 21/02
Tourneys
Escore Tournament StarCraft Season 1 [Megathread] Daily Proleagues Small VOD Thread 2.0 KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 1
Strategy
Fighting Spirit mining rates Zealot bombing is no longer popular? Simple Questions, Simple Answers Current Meta
Other Games
General Games
Path of Exile Diablo 2 thread Nintendo Switch Thread Battle Aces/David Kim RTS Megathread ZeroSpace Megathread
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Mafia Game Mode Feedback/Ideas Vanilla Mini Mafia TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Ask and answer stupid questions here! European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread The Games Industry And ATVI Russo-Ukrainian War Thread
Fan Clubs
The IdrA Fan Club The herO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
[Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books [Manga] One Piece Anime Discussion Thread
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
ADHD And Gaming Addiction…
TrAiDoS
My 2025 Magic: The Gathering…
DARKING
Life Update and thoughts.
FuDDx
How do archons sleep?
8882
StarCraft improvement
iopq
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 2221 users

A story every man can relate to

Forum Index > General Forum
Post a Reply
1 2 3 4 5 Next All
IcedEarth
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States3661 Posts
September 28 2005 12:15 GMT
#1
"I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into
bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel
like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in
the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to
take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We
went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because
she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play
tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy
your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she
was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and
not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either."
Guardian guardian guardian of the blind
FakeSteve[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined July 2003
Valhalla18444 Posts
September 28 2005 12:21 GMT
#2
tee hee zia has a girlfriend
Moderatormy tatsu loops r fuckin nice
EvilTeletubby
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Baltimore, USA22258 Posts
September 28 2005 12:23 GMT
#3
On September 28 2005 21:21 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote:
tee hee zia has a girlfriend


GIRL ON GIRL IS HOT
Moderatorhttp://carbonleaf.yuku.com/topic/408/t/So-I-proposed-at-a-Carbon-Leaf-concert.html ***** RIP Geoff
ColdSoup
Profile Joined February 2005
United States447 Posts
September 28 2005 12:25 GMT
#4
wow thats a good read. hehe bookmark this for future use.
itzme_petey
Profile Blog Joined February 2004
United States1400 Posts
September 28 2005 12:25 GMT
#5
wow read this on entensity. very funny story still.
"Last night, I played a game.. as I recall it was a strategy game.. Peeked around and what did I see, a girl playing starcraft better than me.. and I jizzed in my pants.."
Sfydjklm
Profile Blog Joined April 2005
United States9218 Posts
September 28 2005 12:28 GMT
#6
its very sad story because its true-.-;;
twitter.com/therealdhalism | "Trying out Z = lots of losses vs inferior players until you figure out how to do it well (if it even works)."- Liquid'Tyler
StimpackAbuser
Profile Joined September 2005
Canada46 Posts
September 28 2005 12:29 GMT
#7
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
I don't understand that.

"You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me
to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
I understand that.
Its just 10% Luck, 20% Skill, 15% concentrated power of Will, 5% Pleasure, 50% Pain, and a 100% reason to Remember The Name.
Bill307
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada9103 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-09-28 12:30:56
September 28 2005 12:30 GMT
#8
I have never figured out why men put up with crap like this in the first place (i.e. why doesn't he just dump her and move on).

Oh wait yes I have. It's for the sex.
HeavenS
Profile Joined August 2004
Colombia2259 Posts
September 28 2005 12:30 GMT
#9
Lmao thank you so much, this made my day!
Im cooler than the other side of the pillow.
StimpackAbuser
Profile Joined September 2005
Canada46 Posts
September 28 2005 12:31 GMT
#10
ohh, that means she does not love/know you enough to have sex with you?
Its just 10% Luck, 20% Skill, 15% concentrated power of Will, 5% Pleasure, 50% Pain, and a 100% reason to Remember The Name.
Sfydjklm
Profile Blog Joined April 2005
United States9218 Posts
September 28 2005 12:35 GMT
#11
On September 28 2005 21:31 StimpackAbuser wrote:
ohh, that means she does not love/know you enough to have sex with you?

it means that men are turned on by female body, and women are turned on by how sweet cute and romantic you are to them.
blah blah blah
twitter.com/therealdhalism | "Trying out Z = lots of losses vs inferior players until you figure out how to do it well (if it even works)."- Liquid'Tyler
MoltkeWarding
Profile Joined November 2003
5195 Posts
September 28 2005 12:37 GMT
#12
Personally I think cuddling > stable finances > sex > shopping

ColdSoup
Profile Joined February 2005
United States447 Posts
September 28 2005 12:39 GMT
#13
On September 28 2005 21:37 MoltkeWarding wrote:
Personally I think cuddling > stable finances > sex > shopping



i dont follow? spooning is for queers
Sfydjklm
Profile Blog Joined April 2005
United States9218 Posts
September 28 2005 12:41 GMT
#14
On September 28 2005 21:39 ColdSoup wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 28 2005 21:37 MoltkeWarding wrote:
Personally I think cuddling > stable finances > sex > shopping



i dont follow? spooning is for queers

well when youre as old as moltke you need a stable retirement fund and sex can be too tiresome and cause heart attack.
twitter.com/therealdhalism | "Trying out Z = lots of losses vs inferior players until you figure out how to do it well (if it even works)."- Liquid'Tyler
Luhh
Profile Joined October 2003
Sweden2974 Posts
September 28 2005 12:41 GMT
#15
Yeah, good oldie. Read it a few years ago, but it's still funny.
I wouldn´t call him stupid, but let´s just say he´s unlucky when thinking...
FakeSteve[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined July 2003
Valhalla18444 Posts
September 28 2005 12:45 GMT
#16
On September 28 2005 21:39 ColdSoup wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 28 2005 21:37 MoltkeWarding wrote:
Personally I think cuddling > stable finances > sex > shopping



i dont follow? spooning is for queers


Bahahahhahahaha

best post ever
Moderatormy tatsu loops r fuckin nice
Caution
Profile Joined September 2004
2059 Posts
September 28 2005 12:50 GMT
#17
haahah that was a good read thx
lil.sis
Profile Blog Joined March 2005
China4650 Posts
September 28 2005 12:51 GMT
#18
lol i had forgotten about this

thanks a lot for reminding zia it was a really funny read
好好喝喝天天快乐
Ack1027
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States7873 Posts
September 28 2005 12:59 GMT
#19
On September 28 2005 21:41 Sfydjklm wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 28 2005 21:39 ColdSoup wrote:
On September 28 2005 21:37 MoltkeWarding wrote:
Personally I think cuddling > stable finances > sex > shopping



i dont follow? spooning is for queers

well when youre as old as moltke you need a stable retirement fund and sex can be too tiresome and cause heart attack.


Moltke is 19?
GroT
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Belgium3003 Posts
September 28 2005 13:03 GMT
#20
you're on our side smurfette?
DANCE ALL DAY
1 2 3 4 5 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
LiuLi Cup
11:00
2025 Grand Finals Playoffs
Cure vs Reynor
Clem vs Maru
Rogue vs TriGGeR
ByuN vs Serral
RotterdaM460
PiGStarcraft202
Rex31
Liquipedia
RSL Revival
08:00
S4 Korea Server Qualifier
CranKy Ducklings348
Gemini_1949
LiquipediaDiscussion
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
RotterdaM 460
PiGStarcraft202
ProTech140
MindelVK 35
Rex 31
BRAT_OK 4
StarCraft: Brood War
Barracks 4733
Hyuk 1403
Jaedong 619
Flash 489
Soulkey 277
Light 244
Stork 228
Pusan 154
Soma 147
Last 144
[ Show more ]
Leta 128
Sharp 62
Snow 61
Rush 57
Aegong 55
Free 42
soO 41
Killer 39
sorry 35
Hm[arnc] 33
NaDa 27
910 23
Shine 17
yabsab 17
Movie 16
IntoTheRainbow 15
HiyA 14
Shinee 13
Terrorterran 13
zelot 10
ivOry 5
Calm 0
Dota 2
Fuzer 244
League of Legends
JimRising 489
Counter-Strike
olofmeister1850
byalli581
Super Smash Bros
Mew2King103
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor26
Other Games
crisheroes312
B2W.Neo212
KnowMe34
singsing0
Organizations
Counter-Strike
PGL17239
Other Games
gamesdonequick560
StarCraft 2
ComeBackTV 6
IntoTheiNu 4
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 14 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• LUISG 27
• iHatsuTV 11
• 3DClanTV 1
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Jankos1759
Upcoming Events
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
59m
PSISTORM Gaming Misc
5h 54m
RSL Revival
6h 59m
AI Arena Tournament
8h 59m
Replay Cast
12h 59m
Sparkling Tuna Cup
22h 59m
LiuLi Cup
23h 59m
Ladder Legends
1d 6h
Replay Cast
1d 12h
Replay Cast
1d 21h
[ Show More ]
Wardi Open
2 days
Monday Night Weeklies
2 days
OSC
2 days
WardiTV Winter Champion…
3 days
Replay Cast
3 days
WardiTV Winter Champion…
4 days
Replay Cast
4 days
PiG Sty Festival
4 days
The PondCast
4 days
KCM Race Survival
4 days
WardiTV Winter Champion…
5 days
Replay Cast
5 days
PiG Sty Festival
5 days
Epic.LAN
6 days
Replay Cast
6 days
PiG Sty Festival
6 days
CranKy Ducklings
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Escore Tournament S1: W8
Rongyi Cup S3
Underdog Cup #3

Ongoing

KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 1
LiuLi Cup: 2025 Grand Finals
Nations Cup 2026
PGL Cluj-Napoca 2026
IEM Kraków 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter Qual
eXTREMESLAND 2025
SL Budapest Major 2025

Upcoming

Escore Tournament S1: King of Kings
[S:21] ASL SEASON OPEN 1st Round
[S:21] ASL SEASON OPEN 1st Round Qualifier
[S:21] ASL SEASON OPEN 2nd Round
[S:21] ASL SEASON OPEN 2nd Round Qualifier
Acropolis #4
IPSL Spring 2026
HSC XXIX
uThermal 2v2 2026 Main Event
Bellum Gens Elite Stara Zagora 2026
RSL Revival: Season 4
WardiTV Winter 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
CCT Season 3 Global Finals
FISSURE Playground #3
IEM Rio 2026
PGL Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 1
BLAST Open Spring 2026
ESL Pro League Season 23
ESL Pro League Season 23
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.