EPTDating: How's your luck? - Page 755
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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Mikau
Netherlands1446 Posts
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GreenHorizons
United States23930 Posts
On November 28 2015 19:02 Mikau wrote: Somebody who doesn't give a fuck doesn't go out of his way to seem happy when getting rejected. Not to say you do give a fuck, just saying how that would come across to me. Not only that, "I was going to reject you anyway" seems unnecessarily harsh. Truth. Yeah the "reject" part seems unnecessary, just saying you felt the same way would be sufficient (so you could interact in the future without it being awkward). | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
I doubt I will talk to her much more anyway, she doesn't really interest me. However, even if we did I don't think it will be awkward. | ||
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Acrofales
Spain18285 Posts
On November 28 2015 18:04 bloodwhore~ wrote: Depends on how you look at it in my opinion. The "SCORE!" made it seem like I honestly did not give a fuck, which I don't. It should take away some of the bad feels she had about rejecting me as well.  I think you have to work on your people skills. To me this sounds passive aggressive and vaguely insulting. It's like if two kids are playing with a ball and a third comes along and takes the ball "neener neener, I stole your ball". And your response is "joke's on you, we were done playing anyway". It rings false, and while with children that third kid was intentionally trying to hurt the other kids, so not giving him the gratification makes some innate sense, your girl was just trying to let you down as easily as she could. No need to be aggressive in your response. Not saying that she took it that way. And it might even be an artifact of the translation from Swedish. Just that I read it as an unnecessarily aggressive tone in your response to this girl. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On November 28 2015 20:24 Acrofales wrote: I think you have to work on your people skills. To me this sounds passive aggressive and vaguely insulting. It's like if two kids are playing with a ball and a third comes along and takes the ball "neener neener, I stole your ball". And your response is "joke's on you, we were done playing anyway". It rings false, and while with children that third kid was intentionally trying to hurt the other kids, so not giving him the gratification makes some innate sense, your girl was just trying to let you down as easily as she could. No need to be aggressive in your response. Not saying that she took it that way. And it might even be an artifact of the translation from Swedish. Just that I read it as an unnecessarily aggressive tone in your response to this girl. I could agree with this, however if you knew my personality you would know it wasn't meant as such. She seemed kinda sad that she had to reject me in her text so it was meant as a joke to make it easier for her. Furthermore, if I insult someone it just means I like that person pretty much. Me and my friends are not very politically correct, and death threats/racist jokes/etc are thrown around like nothing. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On November 27 2015 21:17 Merany wrote: "hey, thx for the evening, would love to see you again" message, instead of sending it. See if you feel like sending it and it's genuinely what you honestly feel like without expecting anything back then stick to that honesty. But I'd literally never send that message, and there's no reason to if you want to both increase your chances with women, find out how they feel about you, and getting second dates at the same time. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On November 28 2015 17:16 bloodwhore~ wrote: Got a message from Annika: "Sorry for being cold thursday. Blabal you're a really nice guy but I have been thinking and I think I see you more as a friend. Feels bad telling you this over facebook but I felt I had to say something." My response? "SCORE! I didn't have to be the one rejecting  . No worries, I felt the same thing."You are wise beyond words Lem0n, however I did see it coming as well. Yeah it was pretty clear. And just be bit of a gentleman next time stuff like "No worries, thank you for letting me know! I'm looking for more right now and felt the same way so this is a goodbye, but I did have a great time hanging out with you nonetheless!" | ||
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ElMariachee
1 Post
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[Phantom]
Mexico2170 Posts
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Luepert
United States1933 Posts
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Yoz
Australia357 Posts
On November 29 2015 09:19 Luepert wrote: Why don't you want to talk to her? I'm not certain but I would assume it's so there is more anticipation, conversation and interest when they do meet up for their date. | ||
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Acrofales
Spain18285 Posts
On November 29 2015 06:46 [Phantom] wrote: How would you end a conversation (chat) with a girl that you want to see but you're not sure which day or do what? Cause I would like to not talk to her until I come up with something, but I don't want to talk a lot to her before we go out. I gotta go. Really enjoyed talking to you. How about we continue irl sometime soon? Nor ideal but if you don't know when you have time it's hard. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On November 29 2015 06:46 [Phantom] wrote: How would you end a conversation (chat) with a girl that you want to see but you're not sure which day or do what? Cause I would like to not talk to her until I come up with something, but I don't want to talk a lot to her before we go out. " Anyways girl, I'd love see you - which days are you free to get together?" - She says which days she's free. If she doesn't "Cool let me know when you figure out your schedule" and you end the chat right there Then you can either 1) Not reply until you figure out what and when you'll be doing: The preferred option. Don't be afraid of waiting with your reply for even a full day or more - if she likes you she will wonder about you/assume you're busy and figuring your schedule out. It changed my dating life when I realized that PUAs use this as a purposeful tactic. I don't like tactics like that but now when I'm genuinely busy, need to work on myself or am figuring out awesome date idea like you are I know it's perfectly fine to take my time. 2) text right away, or if she starts messaging without waiting for your reply "Great can't wait to see you! I'll figure my schedule out and text you which day and where we'll meet. Bye for now girl!" And then when you do, text her e.g. "Ok cool, meet me Friday 5am at *popular meeting point*" As a bonus end to that very same message I like to give vague instructions that serve as a hint at what we'll be doing. E.G. before 2kg of chicken wings voucher "P.S. make sure you're hungry" when dancing " Wearing a nice dress strongly recommended" When she asks why "You'll find out on *day you meet* See you then!" | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States45816 Posts
On November 30 2015 15:20 MysteryMeat1 wrote: what's your guys opinion on an online relationship? 100% only/ always online? Or merely meeting people via social media/ dating sites? If you mean 100% online, then it depends on what you want from a relationship. If all you want is the ability to talk and vent (and maybe cybersex?), then I guess that could do. But not ever meeting the person, doing anything with them, potentially taking the relationship further, even knowing if they're real... Those are things that would be necessary for me and what I personally deem successful in a relationship. If you're just referring to getting hooked up with someone via online sites and then meeting them in real life to see if you're compatible, sure that's totally fine. Who cares how you meet as long as you meet? | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
The reason I think its bad, is that I think we'll end up hurting each other when if either of us starts seeing someone else. I was talking to one of my close friends, and he was like you can just see someone and still talk to her. I told him that it wasn't an option based on how we talk to each other. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On November 30 2015 16:30 MysteryMeat1 wrote: No it's purely online, and we won't even be able to meet-up for possible a year. The problem is we both like each enough to facebook call and do hw, talk, and chill 1-2 hours a day almost everyday. Part of me thinks its unhealthy, but another part of me due to parental situations as well as school, don't have time for anything else so doesn't care. The reason I think its bad, is that I think we'll end up hurting each other when if either of us starts seeing someone else. I was talking to one of my close friends, and he was like you can just see someone and still talk to her. I told him that it wasn't an option based on how we talk to each other. Yeah I see literally zero benefits of making it an actual relationship. Why not just be good friends that sometimes jack of to each other on the down low (if that's what you want)? | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On November 30 2015 17:27 MysteryMeat1 wrote: that's cause neither of us can manage to do just that. You mean you will fall in love? Well then go for it, but I think you will kind of regret it later on. You're locking yourself to a girl you won't even see in real when you could find love in real. Or just stay good friends without the masturbation. | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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