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Active: 2263 users

True love and sexual desire - Page 3

Forum Index > Closed
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poasiodss
Profile Joined April 2007
United States63 Posts
May 20 2007 03:15 GMT
#41
Dear thread creator:
Dude I know exactly what you're going through - It happened to me before. One thing I can tell you is that you should get out of that as soon as possible. It will be impossible to maintain any sort of relationship (either friendship or 'relationship' relationship) feeling that way towards someone you are attracted to. From what I remember, it's not so much as missing that sexual feelings towards her, but more like a 'blockage' in your brain when it comes to dealing with that person. Really, it can fuck your thoughts up if you let this develop further. Induce sexual thoughts or something.
zobz
Profile Joined November 2005
Canada2175 Posts
May 20 2007 03:42 GMT
#42
fearing being bad in bed doesn't necessarily explain the porn although maybe it could. maybe you're gay and you love her in a made up fairytale way because you want to convince yourself, but you don't want to have sex because deep down somewhere you know you're not into it. it doesn't have to be an insult, and it obviously could be wrong.
"That's not gonna be good for business." "That's not gonna be good for anybody."
s4rk
Profile Joined December 2003
Philippines137 Posts
May 20 2007 03:48 GMT
#43
in love = hormones

After a year or so, it would be gone so and you're on your own in keeping what you have...

If you want a reference, one of my friends has this book by scott peck "the road less travelled" It would probably give you some insights, but I would not recommend basing your life on a book.
o rly
NewbSaibot
Profile Joined May 2004
3849 Posts
May 20 2007 03:56 GMT
#44
Has the thread author ever had sex before? I can only imagine his distaste for it either stems from long term mental abuse with the belief that sex is dirty and your privates are ugly, or that you are too nervous to do it for the first time and have convinced yourself that you just dont like sex rather than submitting yourself to the act.
I went to the chippy last night and only orderd chips because I knew I could get fish from her bushy plate.
Konni
Profile Blog Joined February 2003
Germany3044 Posts
May 20 2007 04:10 GMT
#45
Just relax it.
WiSaGaN
Profile Joined July 2006
203 Posts
May 20 2007 04:11 GMT
#46
On May 20 2007 11:32 bine wrote:
most people probably haven't felt love in a very extreme way. It's not odd at all that if in fact you are feeling extremely attached to a single person, you won't be interested in having sex with that person at first. The first thing you need to do is relax. Sex is the least important component of your relationship. Just be together, and talk as much as you can about things that you think you really don't want to talk about. If there's anything you're afraid to talk about, talk about it. And then, after that, it will probably mellow out and settle down into a wonderful normality, and you'll either want to have sex or you won't. But either way, not having sex with the one you love is about as trivial as not playing tennis with them. It has nothing to do with the substance of your relationship.


yeah,i am always wondering about what the attachment really is? maybe longing for love from a specific person.
Q~Bert
Profile Joined June 2006
United States670 Posts
May 20 2007 04:19 GMT
#47
On May 20 2007 11:32 bine wrote:
most people probably haven't felt love in a very extreme way. It's not odd at all that if in fact you are feeling extremely attached to a single person, you won't be interested in having sex with that person at first. The first thing you need to do is relax. Sex is the least important component of your relationship. Just be together, and talk as much as you can about things that you think you really don't want to talk about. If there's anything you're afraid to talk about, talk about it. And then, after that, it will probably mellow out and settle down into a wonderful normality, and you'll either want to have sex or you won't. But either way, not having sex with the one you love is about as trivial as not playing tennis with them. It has nothing to do with the substance of your relationship.


Well what if you are dating Venus Williams?
aka: Yaj
merz
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
Sweden2760 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-05-20 04:51:33
May 20 2007 04:50 GMT
#48
On May 20 2007 06:11 Fedaykin wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 20 2007 05:57 meRz wrote:
Wtf its like the complete opposite for me -.-

Almost the same here, when I'm really in love I wanna have sex with that one person all the time and really nobody else, so porn doesn't work, nor do other girls, just want 'her' all the time, sadly I'm without such a 'her' atm..



Uh dunno about the porn thingy but yeah, if you really like a girl all you wanna do is sex her up ;o
Winners never quit, quitters never win.
mrdx
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
Vietnam1555 Posts
May 20 2007 06:29 GMT
#49
Thanks for all replies
I'm physically normal btw -.- I'm way too old for immature childish love but probably not experienced enough for a real commited relationship I guess.
BoxerForever.com - the one and only international Boxer fansite since 2006 :)
PissedOffEmo
Profile Joined March 2007
Canada777 Posts
May 20 2007 06:33 GMT
#50
its called being impotent
Shit happens and then you die
dropthesky
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
Canada285 Posts
May 20 2007 06:35 GMT
#51
On May 20 2007 10:48 Pressure wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May :43 ilovezil wrote:
Actually, I know exactly what the OP is talking about. Perhaps it's because the girls that I tend to like are the "cute" type instead of the "hot" type, but when I really start liking a girl, I become like that. I don't have the sexual desire, but rather, I want to make her happy. Bleh...whatever. Means nothing from a guy who has no female interaction T_T.

Anyway, there are 3 types of girls in this world for me:
1. girls u wanna fuck
2. girls u wanna protect from being fucked
3. girls u wish would fuck off.

4. 13 year old boys u wanna fuck

hmm?


Pressure nobody wants to fuck you
It Is Not That Impossible Is Unachievable, But Simply That Most People Refuse To Believe Otherwise...
il0seonpurpose
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Korea (South)5638 Posts
May 20 2007 06:37 GMT
#52
when you're in real love and you get married and stuff, sex is something different, at least its suppose to be.
zobz
Profile Joined November 2005
Canada2175 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-05-20 06:40:32
May 20 2007 06:39 GMT
#53
i'm sure impotence isn't always a physical problem to say the least. age doesn't mean shit, you're just maybe not mature personally, or lacking somethign more specific
"That's not gonna be good for business." "That's not gonna be good for anybody."
skindzer
Profile Blog Joined May 2005
Chile5114 Posts
May 20 2007 06:45 GMT
#54
Try getting drunk.
Its not only the rain that brings the thunder
Ghin
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States2391 Posts
May 20 2007 06:48 GMT
#55
On May 20 2007 15:45 skindzer wrote:
Try getting drunk.

best advice in thread
Legalize drugs and murder.
funkie
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Venezuela9376 Posts
May 20 2007 06:51 GMT
#56
I'm a virgin.

But If I'm with a girl I really care, I just can't stop thinking about making love to her in the showerzzzzz
CJ Entusman #6! · Strength is the basis of athletic ability. -Rippetoe /* http://j.mp/TL-App <- TL iPhone App 2.0! */
funkie
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Venezuela9376 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-05-20 06:52:15
May 20 2007 06:52 GMT
#57
On May 20 2007 15:35 dropthesky wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 20 2007 10:48 Pressure wrote:
On May :43 ilovezil wrote:
Actually, I know exactly what the OP is talking about. Perhaps it's because the girls that I tend to like are the "cute" type instead of the "hot" type, but when I really start liking a girl, I become like that. I don't have the sexual desire, but rather, I want to make her happy. Bleh...whatever. Means nothing from a guy who has no female interaction T_T.

Anyway, there are 3 types of girls in this world for me:
1. girls u wanna fuck
2. girls u wanna protect from being fucked
3. girls u wish would fuck off.

4. 13 year old boys u wanna fuck

hmm?


Pressure nobody wants to fuck you


Kevin is on a mission. To identify the next TL.net Pedo.
CJ Entusman #6! · Strength is the basis of athletic ability. -Rippetoe /* http://j.mp/TL-App <- TL iPhone App 2.0! */
Imai_Eriko
Profile Joined January 2006
Singapore57 Posts
May 20 2007 06:57 GMT
#58
On May 20 2007 09:43 ilovezil wrote:
Actually, I know exactly what the OP is talking about. Perhaps it's because the girls that I tend to like are the "cute" type instead of the "hot" type, but when I really start liking a girl, I become like that. I don't have the sexual desire, but rather, I want to make her happy. Bleh...whatever. Means nothing from a guy who has no female interaction T_T.

Anyway, there are 3 types of girls in this world for me:
1. girls u wanna fuck
2. girls u wanna protect from being fucked
3. girls u wish would fuck off.



hahahahha
roflmao
MTF
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States1739 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-05-20 07:48:26
May 20 2007 07:36 GMT
#59
On May 20 2007 11:32 bine wrote:
most people probably haven't felt love in a very extreme way. It's not odd at all that if in fact you are feeling extremely attached to a single person, you won't be interested in having sex with that person at first. The first thing you need to do is relax. Sex is the least important component of your relationship. Just be together, and talk as much as you can about things that you think you really don't want to talk about. If there's anything you're afraid to talk about, talk about it. And then, after that, it will probably mellow out and settle down into a wonderful normality, and you'll either want to have sex or you won't. But either way, not having sex with the one you love is about as trivial as not playing tennis with them. It has nothing to do with the substance of your relationship.


Yes and no. Sex isn't the backbone of (most, can't say for all) successful relationships, but it is a key part of them. Human beings by nature are sensual, which is why we like dressing up, being complimented, and feeling the touch of others. Having sex and expressing such interest with someone you love is the ultimate version of that, as it is the one person you care that much about giving you that sort of affirmation and providing a sensual outlet. Granted, there are varying degrees of who has what amount of sensuality about them. But, ask yourself how many people you know, including yourself, that like looking good and like having the interest of another. 99% or more do or are lying if they say they don't, because it's human nature to like feeling wanted. Being nice and respectful is good, but don't be just that, be more.

In other words, sex isn't the most important, but don't keep to a "safe, respectful" path if you ever want to experience full closeness, satisfaction, and passion with the one you love.


Edit: Agree with FakeSteve fully. The average woman will most likely take it as insult whether it's meant to be and explained in full or not. Imagine her (or any person you've ever been sexually interested in) walking up to you and saying that you don't turn her on. That she doesn't want you sexually in any way at all. It's not a good thing, unless you are severely insecure in your sexuality.
Think. :)
FakeSteve[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined July 2003
Valhalla18444 Posts
May 20 2007 07:37 GMT
#60
On May 20 2007 09:10 Bill307 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 20 2007 05:24 mrdx wrote:
Whenever I'm truly in love with someone, all my sexual desires are instantly turned off. Porn doesn't work (while just before I'm in love, even a cheap porn could usually turn my horny self on in < few secs). Kisses, hugs, touches, and sometimes even oral don't work either. Basically I don't want to have sex with the one I truly deeply love.

Have you ever experienced this problem? Or, should I see this as a problem? Is it because I'm Asian? Please feel free to share your thoughts.

Are you both happy and feel no regrets that the sexual desire isn't there?

Then there is no problem.


yes there is

because if she says she's ok with him not wanting to fuck her she's lying through her teeth
Moderatormy tatsu loops r fuckin nice
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