|
On January 01 2012 23:44 xavra41 wrote:
Read a LR and watched a video of yours Squattin and overall i liked what i saw. A few problems is that you have like two different modes.First one is you act like mystery acting fake and mostly talking about yourself. The other one is when you listen to her and use the situation to your advantage ( like when you had to change a tire, but you handled business like a man). I think the latter method is far superior and you can just tell the girls like to more by the tone of their voice.
You also seem to usually start with the first method (if i hear another joke about asians/race im gunna puke) then as time goes on you become more of a natural. I would just confidently approach and say i was interested in her ( not about looks if she is pretty cuz its played out). and let her talk about her passions. Everybody likes to be truly listened to and more importantly you can find out if you have good genuine chemistry with her.
Haha, I have been called before for using too much racial stereotypes / Asian jokes. Its something I need to stop. And yes, I am aware of it. I listen to too much to stand up comedy! Its all Dave Chappell and Russel Peter's fault! lol!
You have to understand, a lot of girls don't talk or invest a lot right off the bat. You have to reach a critical hook point. This is why with black and latina girls (who tends to be more expressive and extrovert), I go into what you perhaps call "natural mode" much quicker. Its like a snowball effect and we both jump into banter mode. But other than that, when I open, many times the girls are fucking distracted talking to each other, waiting on a friend, or just generally being "I don't give a shit" or "its girls night out, leave us alone" mode and that is when I am in "plow mode". And it is frustrating when I am talking 95% and the girl puts in 5% which consists of one word or short sentence dialogue. I can't really improvise build off on her content. When the conversation reaches more like 70/30, its when I get enough content to really shine.
Other than that it really blows. I'm really left just cold reading, talking about the environment, talking about my self or just go into story telling mode, or tease her and hopefully get the conversation going. This is why I hate talking to "most" Asian girls. Its like I'm talking to a wall. You can't really go straight into rapport building without attraction and some sort of qualification. Otherwise, she just doesn't give a shit and you are just left looking like an AFC standing around asking a bunch dumb questions.
A lot of naturals don't plow. They do simple numbers game. They open, and if the girl is attracted quickly, they keep going but if they aren't attracted, most naturals just bounce. I guess I am trained to plow and I think its a necessary skill set. Because getting laid by a simple numbers game doesn't really improve your "game", it just increases your lay count. I believe in the process of getting better and getting the skill, thats why I plow even though sometimes I don't have anything better to say. Many times I will plow even thought I can tell I will reach a dead end and I will still plow 20 minutes anyways. You learn the most in pickup when you are in uncomfortable and challenging situations. Think about it, in which situation do you learn more game, when the girl is not that into you and you are struggling and hopefully write that in your field report, or when a girl is just physically into you and rubbing your cock on the dance floor? You probably don't need a lot of game to progress the second one. This is why after only one year in the game, most people think my banter is fucking amazing for the amount of time I been sarging. Why? I plow through difficult situations. I never leave until the girl pretty much tells me to fuck off. Saying anything is better than stalling and not saying anything at all. I do believe that perfect HB10 somewhere in my future will earned through a difficult process.
|
Yeah I definitely get where you are coming from. I do play the numbers game because I think its the most important part. I don't disagree with you though we simply have different interests. I like embracing my oneitis sometimes and finding the best girl to spend that time with. Weeding out all the ditsy girls i have nothing in common with is a must.
I disagree about the plowing part though. Yeah you are getting better at increasing that lay percentage, but I'm also practicing finding that girl you don't mind waking up to in the morning. A girl who isn't comfortable enough to talk about her interests with me and would rather have me entertain her instead isn't worth the time. The best 8 months of my life was with this beautiful latina girl who was positive and down for pretty much anything. Our first date we went to where she had her prom and danced drunk together in the parking lot. It was a lot of fun and I would take that over the standard dinner movie sex any day.
Enough about me though. Part of the problem you are having with getting a girl to open with you is that are doing it in the wrong place. Night clubs are loud and almost impossible to have a quality conversation there. I prefer day game because there are tons HBs walking down the street in San Diego or around in University. Getting her to talk about herself is all about finding something she is interested in, then steering the conversation there and letting her talk. As long as you don't go in interview mode there should be some rapid rapport building!
|
On January 01 2012 06:42 Catch wrote:Show nested quote +On January 01 2012 03:26 matiK23 wrote:
Too many keyboard jockeys in here and too much theory crafting, rather than actual pussy grabbing. This thread fails. Agreed somewhat. Gotta have somewhere to talk about it though. I failed last night with a girl I was attracted to. It just was a downward spiral, even though I think she was trying to make herself available.
lol... I'm just reading this thread and posting in it out of curiosity. Not all of us here are studying or some shit. I'm married with no intention on trying to pick up girls. I just want to read about how you guys are doing on the "outside".
|
On January 03 2012 04:50 xavra41 wrote:
Yeah I definitely get where you are coming from. I do play the numbers game because I think its the most important part. I don't disagree with you though we simply have different interests. I like embracing my oneitis sometimes and finding the best girl to spend that time with. Weeding out all the ditsy girls i have nothing in common with is a must.
I disagree about the plowing part though. Yeah you are getting better at increasing that lay percentage, but I'm also practicing finding that girl you don't mind waking up to in the morning. A girl who isn't comfortable enough to talk about her interests with me and would rather have me entertain her instead isn't worth the time. The best 8 months of my life was with this beautiful latina girl who was positive and down for pretty much anything. Our first date we went to where she had her prom and danced drunk together in the parking lot. It was a lot of fun and I would take that over the standard dinner movie sex any day.
Enough about me though. Part of the problem you are having with getting a girl to open with you is that are doing it in the wrong place. Night clubs are loud and almost impossible to have a quality conversation there. I prefer day game because there are tons HBs walking down the street in San Diego or around in University. Getting her to talk about herself is all about finding something she is interested in, then steering the conversation there and letting her talk. As long as you don't go in interview mode there should be some rapid rapport building!
Again, im working on getting the skill, not the girl. I like night clubs because:
1. Lots of sets, less looking around.
2. Hardest sets, if you can open in a club, you can open anywhere. Believe me, going from club to Barnes and Nobles or Starbucks is like child's play for me.
3. More naturals you can observe from.
4. Better kino practice.
5. Its just overall more fun because there are hotter girls and you get to escalate and well you can't get banned so you can take more risks (unless you are being a total retard).
|
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not.
|
On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not.
incorrect. develop habits and lifestyle changes that would allow you to possess attractive traits without you having to fake it. Think of it as developing certain skillsets on a resume. You may not start with it, but you sure as hell as learn it.
Off my head:
- decent physique and hygiene (no fat stinky slobs)
- decent sense of fashion (no ripped jeans, loose t-shirts, crappy shoes)
- not too socially awkward (have focussed conversations about a variety of topics, know how to lead, not saying something really off, or being judgmental)
- know how to have fun (not a negativity blackhole, like someone who is always pessimistic, always complaining/whining, always have a grouchy face, i actually know someone like that and lets not talk about girls, people just dont wanna be around him, and he wonders why he as the nice guy never gets a girl.)
- humorous (this is tough, I have to learn this one)
- show some commitment (again, girls think I am a casanova.. which kinda hurts :/)
|
On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not.
Its not like when you become funny.... that you are only funny around girls. You pretty much become funny everywhere. I make old ladies at hair salons laugh. I make random homeless guys laugh. It just becomes a part of you after months of working at something.
There are a lot of tweaks that happen by being around girls that auto fix itself. Its almost impossible to describe because they are super subtle nuances. For example... I can talk sexual to a girl now without creeping her out. How do I do it? Don't fucking know! It just happens when your are comfortable in that environment! I don't know what it is, but the act of getting laid fixes a lot of shit. This is why guys can't be picky at first. Why? If you are a virgin, and you only want to bang 9's and 10's, how often do you encounter 9's and 10's so you get enough practice to bang more 9's and 10's? We don't live millenniums! Start banging 5s and 6s if you suck and then once you hit like 20 lays, go for qualify over quantity.
|
On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
- Congruence
- Confidence
- Social value
- Leadership
- Sense of humor
- Smile
- Being well groomed
It's pretty much universal.
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
The point is, not to act, but become attractive (or fake it till you make it, but really work on yourself at the same time).
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not.
Depends on what kind of charming we're talking about. For me charming, equals attracting with communication.
|
On January 04 2012 16:37 squattincassanova wrote:Show nested quote +On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not. Its not like when you become funny.... that you are only funny around girls. You pretty much become funny everywhere. I make old ladies at hair salons laugh. I make random homeless guys laugh. It just becomes a part of you after months of working at something. There are a lot of tweaks that happen by being around girls that auto fix itself. Its almost impossible to describe because they are super subtle nuances. For example... I can talk sexual to a girl now without creeping her out. How do I do it? Don't fucking know! It just happens when your are comfortable in that environment! I don't know what it is, but the act of getting laid fixes a lot of shit. This is why guys can't be picky at first. Why? If you are a virgin, and you only want to bang 9's and 10's, how often do you encounter 9's and 10's so you get enough practice to bang more 9's and 10's? We don't live millenniums! Start banging 5s and 6s if you suck and then once you hit like 20 lays, go for qualify over quantity.
While I agree with you a lot of times I'm gonna have to say no on this. If you don't find someone attractive (and a 5 seems pretty deplorable to me) then it's just intellectually dishonest to bang them. You're putting the girl on a pedestal just by saying this, as if they somehow magically are harder to pick up because they are really, really attractive. But the truth is, some girls are really fucking beautiful and they have zero confidence and latch on to the first guy that treats them okay. Some ugly 5's have confidence like a rock star and getting with them is nearly impossible.
So instead of saying "okay I'm not ready to hit on 10's yet" try saying "am I interested or not" and go from there. If you think that 10's are special (seems like you do) then you've already put them at a higher value then yourself. You're going in there with preconceived expectations of what that girl is like, when you really have no evidence at all other than a mostly inaccurate stereotype. You don't have to work your way up the ladder. The ladder is a delusion.
|
On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not.
I agree with most people said. Not all men can be born good looking, but all men can be handsome.
First two approaches today. Simple "Hey what class is this?" Gotta start small. Haha.
One was a black chick, and the other was a dude (... lol). I didn't have a choice with the dude, no one else was around and I told myself I'd ask at least one person in the class. So uh... I'll take it. Kinda.
|
On January 05 2012 01:58 Catch wrote:Show nested quote +On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not. I agree with most people said. Not all men can be born good looking, but all men can be handsome. First two approaches today. Simple "Hey what class is this?" Gotta start small. Haha. One was a black chick, and the other was a dude (... lol). I didn't have a choice with the dude, no one else was around and I told myself I'd ask at least one person in the class. So uh... I'll take it. Kinda.
Hahaha I do that too sometimes. Especially in more social environments like concerts, parties, and I have picked up some girls from randomly talking to guys (part of a group) or got to know more people, and get free stuff (like drinks) simply by talking! You never know whats around the corner.
|
On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
The vast majority of mainstream, heterosexual women are sexually attracted to charismatic, socially-skilled, and dominant men of higher social status.
That said, people vary enormously and if your ideal women are not mainstream, they will probably be attracted to a different sets of traits.
On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
The goal is not to act attractive to women; the goal is to become attractive to most women. While you may "act" confident at first, the desired end state is to be confident. In other words, the idea is to "fake it 'til you make it" aka "learning"!
It's just like how a novice Starcraft gamer has to copy build orders and play in new ways, until those things become second nature/improvisational and a normal part of what that gamer does.
|
|
|
Do you want her to be the mother of your children?
If yes, marry her(with a prenup!), get her pregnant, etc until death do you part.
If no, take the opportunities as they come, until you find one about whom you could answer yes to the above question.
|
On January 05 2012 16:31 decafchicken wrote:
I'll try to explain this as best as i can:
I'm 21 with a steady girlfriend for the past 1.5 months.
I've been having sex with her for ~7 months (during which time she banged two of my best friends)
Roughly the whole time i was having sex with other girls while i was hooking up with her
Now that I'm dating her (and for some reason reeeeeeeally like her) I run into oppurtunities to hook up with other girls hotter than her (i.e. i'm not doing much, they are initiating) and i do enjoy a good ol conquering of the opposite sex.
So basically, i've hooked up with other girls while we were basically almost dating but now that we are i don't know if i should take advantage of these oppurtunities.
Edit: i would assume i'm going to marry NO women i meet at this age.
Social paradigm dictates that a stable sexual relationship is exclusive, so I would guess that, unless otherwise noted, your girlfriend would rightfully expect you to be faithful to her. Now you have three choices - either you cheat on her, or you don't hook up with other women, or the two of you agree to have an "open" relationship. Since she seems not too reluctant to hook up with different men, I'd actually try going for the third option... assuming of course that you're ok with her having sex with other guys (if you're not, you might want to go for option two, at least if you're actually interested in a fair relationship).
However, one little word of warning: Even if you view the expectation of sexual exclusiveness as somewhat optional for a functioning relationship, it's hard to deny that being faithful adds a certain degree of valuation to your partner. While it's certainly possible to value your partner in a different way, you'd have to find other means to show your respect towards her (and vice versa) in order to make up for the lack of exclusiveness. From my experience, this is what's hardest in such an open relationship.
|
On January 03 2012 21:06 squattincassanova wrote:
2. Hardest sets, if you can open in a club, you can open anywhere. Believe me, going from club to Barnes and Nobles or Starbucks.
Wow really? I feel the exact opposite. I would feel more pressure opening a "set" outside of a night club than Barnes & Nobles.
Why? Well because if I was at a book store checking out books I'd be more defensive of people trying to start up a conversation with me unless they were physically attractive.
If someone came up to me in a night club I would be more open to talk because night clubs are more social than a book store. Correct me if I'm wrong... Also I really think night clubs are like one of the EASIEST places to open a "set".
Girls KNOW guys are going to hit on them there. Some girls go to those clubs just to find guys. I've lived with like three girls for over a year before all at the same time. (Three's Company starts playing in my head) LONG STORY! Anyways I know a tiny, tiny, tiny (I repeat) tiny bit of a woman's mind. I can't say a lot because I don't think ANY guy knows women accurately. From what I do know is that there are women that go to night clubs exclusively to meet guys just like yourself.
Night clubs are meant for social gatherings, entertainment, drinking, and etc. It's a relaxed environment compared to Starbucks and Barnes & Noble. Just imagine a stranger asking to sit next to you at Starbucks and then starts running pick up lines on you. I'd put up a invisible wall to if I get creeped out.
PS: Actually I got to admit, I have successfully done a "set" at a small Ice cream/ coffee shop back in my single days. It was a coffee / ice cream shop and it was two girls. My friend bet me to go talk to them. They were cute, but I wasn't in the mood for "sarging" I did it anyways because my friend kept begging me to do it. So I went up to the two girls with a non creepy smile to get them comfortable. I made a quick intro talk and then asked them how their ice cream was. The whole time I was talking to them I made it felt like we were really close as if we had already built rapport. It was like some psychological shit. Then one of the girls offered me her ice cream and I was "in". My friend looked dumbfounded as I was now sitting with the two girls and he was sitting all alone. Then he came over all happy and excited and grabbed one of the girl's numbers. I wasn't interested in the girls so I didn't care that he got the number. I was basically just opening for him, but it just felt good to practice the "game".
I feel kind of bad about how in the past I felt like I was playing with women's heads. Ok I'm lying that shit was fun! *sigh* I have to keep reminding myself I'm married.
|
On January 05 2012 01:57 shinosai wrote:Show nested quote +On January 04 2012 16:37 squattincassanova wrote:On January 04 2012 12:13 heroyi wrote:
So...what exactly are the "traits" that women seem to be interested in (if there is any general traits that females usually go for)?
You discuss of how you want to exemplify the traits and characteristics of which females are attracted to and minimize the unattractive traits. Thus do not act yourself near a women but instead act in a certain way (aka game?)
edit: and how would one define to be "charming?" I like to think I am a charming guy but then again I don't want to end up being one of those fools who thinks they are but really are not. Its not like when you become funny.... that you are only funny around girls. You pretty much become funny everywhere. I make old ladies at hair salons laugh. I make random homeless guys laugh. It just becomes a part of you after months of working at something. There are a lot of tweaks that happen by being around girls that auto fix itself. Its almost impossible to describe because they are super subtle nuances. For example... I can talk sexual to a girl now without creeping her out. How do I do it? Don't fucking know! It just happens when your are comfortable in that environment! I don't know what it is, but the act of getting laid fixes a lot of shit. This is why guys can't be picky at first. Why? If you are a virgin, and you only want to bang 9's and 10's, how often do you encounter 9's and 10's so you get enough practice to bang more 9's and 10's? We don't live millenniums! Start banging 5s and 6s if you suck and then once you hit like 20 lays, go for qualify over quantity. While I agree with you a lot of times I'm gonna have to say no on this. If you don't find someone attractive (and a 5 seems pretty deplorable to me) then it's just intellectually dishonest to bang them. You're putting the girl on a pedestal just by saying this, as if they somehow magically are harder to pick up because they are really, really attractive. But the truth is, some girls are really fucking beautiful and they have zero confidence and latch on to the first guy that treats them okay. Some ugly 5's have confidence like a rock star and getting with them is nearly impossible. So instead of saying "okay I'm not ready to hit on 10's yet" try saying "am I interested or not" and go from there. If you think that 10's are special (seems like you do) then you've already put them at a higher value then yourself. You're going in there with preconceived expectations of what that girl is like, when you really have no evidence at all other than a mostly inaccurate stereotype. You don't have to work your way up the ladder. The ladder is a delusion.
First of all, I open everyone. Doesn't matter what scale rating they are at. I have no problems opening the hottest girls in the club. Second of all, getting lays with 7s are a lot easier than 10's. This is the general, dont try to find exceptions to prove a point. Asians are on average shorter than white people. Pointing out Yao Ming is tall doesn't win an argument for you. Pointing out a particular confident fatty that doesn't spread her legs does not change any generalities. If banging a 10 was easy, why isn't everyone banging them?
Second of all, HB10s are hard to find. So the probability of less plus being harder means your likely hood of lays with a 10 is less than with a 7. This is backed up by 2000 sets that I have opened this year, lets not keyboard jockey here. 10's are not special. I am simply basing this on statistics and a normal distribution curve of hotness. Lets think kinder garden math here. If there is 1 girl out of 500 that is considered a 10. And there are 50 girls out of 500 that are considered a 7, then that 1 girl would need to have sex with 50x more guys than the 7's to make the odds even.
On January 05 2012 18:08 Silentness wrote:Show nested quote +On January 03 2012 21:06 squattincassanova wrote:
2. Hardest sets, if you can open in a club, you can open anywhere. Believe me, going from club to Barnes and Nobles or Starbucks.
Wow really? I feel the exact opposite. I would feel more pressure opening a "set" outside of a night club than Barnes & Nobles. Why? Well because if I was at a book store checking out books I'd be more defensive of people trying to start up a conversation with me unless they were physically attractive. If someone came up to me in a night club I would be more open to talk because night clubs are more social than a book store. Correct me if I'm wrong... Also I really think night clubs are like one of the EASIEST places to open a "set". Girls KNOW guys are going to hit on them there. Some girls go to those clubs just to find guys. I've lived with like three girls for over a year before all at the same time. (Three's Company starts playing in my head) LONG STORY! Anyways I know a tiny, tiny, tiny (I repeat) tiny bit of a woman's mind. I can't say a lot because I don't think ANY guy knows women accurately. From what I do know is that there are women that go to night clubs exclusively to meet guys just like yourself. Night clubs are meant for social gatherings, entertainment, drinking, and etc. It's a relaxed environment compared to Starbucks and Barnes & Noble. Just imagine a stranger asking to sit next to you at Starbucks and then starts running pick up lines on you. I'd put up a invisible wall to if I get creeped out. PS: Actually I got to admit, I have successfully done a "set" at a small Ice cream/ coffee shop back in my single days. It was a coffee / ice cream shop and it was two girls. My friend bet me to go talk to them. They were cute, but I wasn't in the mood for "sarging" I did it anyways because my friend kept begging me to do it. So I went up to the two girls with a non creepy smile to get them comfortable. I made a quick intro talk and then asked them how their ice cream was. The whole time I was talking to them I made it felt like we were really close as if we had already built rapport. It was like some psychological shit. Then one of the girls offered me her ice cream and I was "in". My friend looked dumbfounded as I was now sitting with the two girls and he was sitting all alone. Then he came over all happy and excited and grabbed one of the girl's numbers. I wasn't interested in the girls so I didn't care that he got the number. I was basically just opening for him, but it just felt good to practice the "game". I feel kind of bad about how in the past I felt like I was playing with women's heads. Ok I'm lying that shit was fun! *sigh* I have to keep reminding myself I'm married.
Well... when you open 2000 sets and you opened 1500 sets during night time, and 500 sets during day time.... and you still feel otherwise, come talk to me.
|
On January 05 2012 16:31 decafchicken wrote:
I'll try to explain this as best as i can:
I'm 21 with a steady girlfriend for the past 1.5 months.
I've been having sex with her for ~7 months (during which time she banged two of my best friends)
Roughly the whole time i was having sex with other girls while i was hooking up with her
Now that I'm dating her (and for some reason reeeeeeeally like her) I run into oppurtunities to hook up with other girls hotter than her (i.e. i'm not doing much, they are initiating) and i do enjoy a good ol conquering of the opposite sex.
So basically, i've hooked up with other girls while we were basically almost dating but now that we are i don't know if i should take advantage of these oppurtunities.
Edit: i would assume i'm going to marry NO women i meet at this age.
Aren't you that Asian kid who got circumcised? I must say, you have in a single post outshined everything squattincassanova has posted in this entire thread with all his field reports and gay photos.
|
Hi all,
I only just registered on TL for the sc2 content but came across this and feel compelled to comment. Back in summer my brother returned from a trip and handed me the book 'the game' as a (second hand pass down) "gift", nonetheless i read it off and on on public transport on my way to work and was surprised to recognise my own past behaviours in some of the techniques described in the book.
Off the back of a long relationship in college I went on this rampage of picking up random women, for a whole year and a half or so. I was good at it. I guess I was what they call a natural. Anyway, eventually I picked up a girl and fell for her, she remains my current love interest. I basically want to marry her, but she's got her doubts, in particular in regard to how we met, and what i was doing at the time.
With the benefit of hindsight I've realised most guys, or according to my gf, every guy should do this in his late teens or early twneties, play around. Play the field. I appreciate not all of us are equally socially apt and uninhibited and we all have different sense of humour, some easier to catch onto than others, but I don't think teaching yourself pre-formed techniques lines, behaviours, psychological games and so is a healthy pastime to maintain.
Nature's game is between men and women. It's right that way. When you get into this pickup game, you're zoning out the natural game and replacing it with a game you are only playing with yourself, and maybe a few buddies of yourself. And if you're honest with yourself you are doing this because you cannot for whatever reason get yourself to play the man-woman game the way it's meant to be played. Leave it up to nature is my advice.
I for one somewhat regret that phase of my life and how i totally lost control and acted like a monkey just because i enjoyed the feedback i got from the female gender. You're not missing that much. Drunk sex sucks. Sex with strangers pretty much always sucks and you wake up feeling awkward or worst case scenario feeling sleezy and longing for a quick exit.
It's plausible to me why many guy are drawn to this, it combines the great interest of women with a game that has a score. men are suckers for scores. That's why starcraft and the likes is so popular. You can rack of up notches on your belt. How many lays or what's the term sets? So if there's one guy who's talking to about 3000 odd girls in the past year and not once noticed himself thinking "hey, this girl is really cool, i'm going to stop doing this and just focus on her", well, this kid is wearing big fat blinkers.
There should also be an evolution along your span of life, it's referred to growing up. While playing around when you're early 20s is fine, once you go into your late 20s you should have grown up. If you're still hitting the clubs every other weeknight you're more likely mingling with people 5 years younger now. The decent girls that are going places and are interesting have moved on from the clubs and pick up joints. Therefore so should you. While playing video games it's clear for everyone that what is happening is a game, the situation is not so clear when engagement with real people and their potential emotions. Some women don't receive that much interest and when they do it gets their hopes up. Even just being nice and taking a number when you know you're never going to call can be cruel and hurt someone. I speak from experience here.
I realise by now I'm rambling so I'll close here. Just one more thing, women are individuals, just as much as men. Trying to box them according to some easily recognisable criteria (or even race) is just silly. From my experience women are attracted to attention from men and confidence in men. The very pretty ones sometimes receive too much attention so that less is more with them. It's best to be honest and say what you want without getting sappy or overly emotional.That's all there is to it really from my point of view. No need to buy books, spend money, or dedicated large parts of your spare time to something that comes naturally to you.
|
One last thing. This pick up game is becoming popular, even in continental europe. You go to a club or bar and get a drink and you return to your chillout area and a guy has come and sat near your girlfriend or her friends or whoever and it's just clear what he's doing. I've seen a couple of these guys and sure, girls laugh, and talk a little, they're clowns after all. It's conceivable the pickup artist gets a number, so i guess it works. After reading the book i've come across two of these guys on nights out. And to be frank, it's a bit like seeing zebra standing in a pedestrian zone, in an amusing harmless sense. It's a bit odd, as if you're having a kickabout and a guy in full tennis gear joins. I notice, I'm sure other guys notice, so that leads me to believe the targets ,the girls also know what's going on by now.
|
|
|
|
|
|
EPT
