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strarcrarftr 2 jorker threrardr

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sharkmonger13
Profile Joined January 2011
United States21 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 04:06:10
February 20 2011 02:31 GMT
#1
Hey all, i've been looking for a solid sc2 joke thread, but none really delivered the content i wanted, so i decided i would make my own

This thread will be updated 1-2 times a week and contain jokes that i made up or good ones from the thread.

Here are some to start us off

1.a sniper went up on a hill and said " i can shoot so far more far than anyone else" and another unit said "i beg to differ"...it was a viking

2.what did the zealot say to the speedling? get over here your too fast

3.wait this is weird...how does a tank fit in a ...medivac?? XD

4.the bartender said to the marine what drink do u want and the marine said i dont want a drink i want more stim paks!!!!!!!

5.THOR IS HERE!!! a thor says while he gets pwned by a bunch of roaches then dies

6.what kind of motor cycle does a marine ride? a battle cruiser

7.what does a mother ship do when hes sick of fighting with his wife? he puts her in a vortex (Warning : this is only a temporary solution.)

8.a ghost and a marine were having a nice talk to each other. they kept talking to each other , and the ghost said "i have to use the bathroom" , 10 secondcs later te marine heard "NUCLEAR LAUNCH DETECTED!!" AND THE MARINE WAS LIKE :OOOOOOOO

9.Advertisement : Zergs. tired of terrans dropping a thor on your cliff? don't worry, you can ju-

10.what kind of baby do 2 infestors make? an infested terran

11.a hydra tries to go to wal mart but by the time he gets there its closed

12.a big fat guy jumped in the water and said " i have the biggest splash" and a tank said i beg to differ

13.a zerg is attacking a protoss and owning him with roaches and then he sees a void ray and is like OH SHI-

14.u know whats so weird? o.O i saw a hellion...with a zergling driving it! Wtf? O.O

15.why do banelings roll? because they r so drunk

16.a marine was getting set up in a date with a brood lord. the marine asked the brood lord"about time your here" and the brood lord said "sorry im the longest nunit it takes for t3 because terran can get thor so quick"

17.a zerg decided to get 500 lings for an all out swarm attack. unfotunately the protoss had a sentry with full energy

18.a bunch of units keep atacking this other unit, but it wont die. why wont it die? its an immortal

19.the immortal asked the dark templar what kind of prisoners he got, and the immortal said, i got 2 HIGH templars

20."look at that unit..its a marine..now its a zealot...now its a zergling!"...it was a changeling....

21.rachel ray said "i got the perfect mix of treats here" and protoss said..no u dont and showed her a colossus void rays and zealots

22.gandalf needed powerful strength to block the demon...all the protoss needed was a forcefield

23.ultralisks? more like minilisks

24.a protoss said i need ot make this unit faster and chronoboosted the building

25.a marine said to his fellow marine in a battle "cast a fireball!" and the other marine said "wrong game buddy"

26.Theres two types of people in this world...People who do good in tournaments and huk.

27. An interviewer asks a high templar, who was your childhood idol? The high templar responds with kid cudi...because hes so high

28.a protoss in blue "trunks " (tb) is afraid of a red protoss. why? The red protoss looks like blood!

29.A terran looks at a protoss and says i'm hungry, the protoss responds with well ya cant eat me im made of metal!

30.Theres two types of people in this world....Marines and medivacs

31.What did the marine say to the hydralisk u mad u useless

32.a protoss said this game is going really slow and realized he said 100 chronoboost
had*

33.A protoss said to the terran "Man stim is ov...." The terran hit him with a swift stim timing attack

34.What did the marauder say to the marine? "I do better dps than you

35.A terran player runs into a protoss players base and asks why was your army not by the ramp, the protoss player responds by saying well i was worried there was going to be a blue flame helion drop, a marine drop, banshees, viking harass, a thor drop, or proxy helions

36.A zerg user looks at his base and sees 12 drones on minerals and says i really need to get more drones, a terran user looks at the same situation and says i'm fine!
and drops a mule

37.A reaper walks into a bar full of marauders and the marauders say "When did huk get here?

38.A collossus and a void ray are on a mothership for a vacation, and the void ray says "Boy do we mix well!"

39.A little girl is walking around town and notices a large mechanical object following her. what is it?
stalker

40.Zeratul walks into a bar full of stalkers and says, why the long face, robot?

41.A tired viking is flying around lost temple and spots a medivac. What does he say?
Care to give me a lift?

42.A thor walks to a bar and gets there just before closing time and asks why is there no counter

43.A hydralisk and a reaper walk to a bar to celebrate their new marriage, and the reaper gets home before the hydralisk gets there

Poll: best joke group?

(61)
 
88%

41-43 (3)
 
4%

1-4 (2)
 
3%

9-12 (1)
 
1%

21-24 (1)
 
1%

37-40 (1)
 
1%

5-8 (0)
 
0%

13-16 (0)
 
0%

17-20 (0)
 
0%

25-28 (0)
 
0%

29-32 (0)
 
0%

33-36 (0)
 
0%

69 total votes

Your vote: best joke group?

(Vote): 1-4
(Vote): 5-8
(Vote): 9-12
(Vote): 13-16
(Vote): 17-20
(Vote): 21-24
(Vote): 25-28
(Vote): 29-32
(Vote): 33-36
(Vote): 37-40
(Vote): 41-43
(Vote):




Edit: Thanks for the positive feedback, but to all the naysayers, please do not post in this thread, i'd like to keep it clean

recently added:

44.your momma's so fat, it takes two motherships to cloak her.

45. You mothership is such a slut she cloaks enemy units and her vortex is a 7 radius

46.What food does a roach hate the most? ban-cheese!

47.Why do marines go to the toss base? to blow off some steam(stim)?

48.A collosus walks into a bar.

49.Why does IdrA eat soup with his fork? coz he wants to complain about how imba the spoon really is.

50. What's small, yellow, and loves to rape faces fast and hard? marines on stim

51. Why did the mother ship vortex all of the protoss units?
It didn't recall

52. What's the worst path to take if you don't want to be harassed?
the "creep" highway!

53. whats the difference between an apple and an nydus worm? have u ever tried nydus worm pie??!

54. what is even bigger than an ultralisk? a giant!

55. A Terran on a Terran Protoss team was gearing up for the final push. He positioned his tanks outside his base. There were thors and hellions for backup. As he was about to deal the final blow the Protoss took his

mothership and initiated a

factory recall

CAN A MOD PLEASE CHANGE THE TITLE TO STARCRAFT 2 JOKE THREAD, THANKYOU

User was temp banned for this post.
'What is a child without his manhood?' hekori
`Winter
Profile Joined November 2010
United Kingdom19 Posts
February 20 2011 02:33 GMT
#2
is this a + Show Spoiler +
joke?
cheapfood
Profile Joined January 2011
United States56 Posts
February 20 2011 02:34 GMT
#3
very funny
Hypemeup
Profile Joined February 2011
Sweden2783 Posts
February 20 2011 02:34 GMT
#4
Stolen from an earlier epic thread but:

What did the SCV say to scare his buddy?
+ Show Spoiler +

junemermaid
Profile Joined September 2006
United States981 Posts
February 20 2011 02:34 GMT
#5
These are awful...
the UMP says YER OUT
dogcore
Profile Joined January 2011
Albania128 Posts
February 20 2011 02:34 GMT
#6
so this one guy 6pools a terran
underdawg
Profile Joined January 2011
United States399 Posts
February 20 2011 02:34 GMT
#7
dude
junemermaid
Profile Joined September 2006
United States981 Posts
February 20 2011 02:34 GMT
#8
On February 20 2011 11:34 Hypemeup wrote:
Stolen from an earlier epic thread but:

What did the SCV say to scare his buddy?
+ Show Spoiler +

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB2GboGOuTI


That thread was fantastic.
the UMP says YER OUT
dogcore
Profile Joined January 2011
Albania128 Posts
February 20 2011 02:35 GMT
#9
whats the earlier thread link?
Colourz
Profile Joined January 2011
England27 Posts
February 20 2011 02:36 GMT
#10
On February 20 2011 11:31 sharkmonger13 wrote:
11.a hydra tries to go to wal mart but by the time he gets there its closed


I actually laughed out loud, I don't even
Dont Panic
Profile Joined October 2010
United States194 Posts
February 20 2011 02:37 GMT
#11
WORST JOKES EVER... im sorry dude you just dont have it in you
I am order. I am logic. I know exactly who I am.
junemermaid
Profile Joined September 2006
United States981 Posts
February 20 2011 02:37 GMT
#12
On February 20 2011 11:35 dogcore wrote:
whats the earlier thread link?


http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=142680
the UMP says YER OUT
Beardedclam
Profile Joined September 2010
United States839 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 02:45:10
February 20 2011 02:41 GMT
#13
Pretty funny but only because they suck so much.
"bye bye" - genius "#$@% you" - Idra------------|Genius|DRG|Keen|---------Breakfast.213
Backpack
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States1776 Posts
February 20 2011 02:43 GMT
#14
These are so awful but I can't stop laughing.
"You people need to just generally care a lot less about everything." -Zatic
Lennon
Profile Joined February 2010
United Kingdom2275 Posts
February 20 2011 02:45 GMT
#15
I tried to laugh but... I just couldn't.
Did you come up with these yourself?
Spekulatius
Profile Joined January 2011
Germany2413 Posts
February 20 2011 02:46 GMT
#16
Those just didn't work on me, sorry (and sorry for not keeping your thread "clean" by not giving positive feedback, but i mean, come on)
Always smile~
Shiv.
Profile Joined January 2011
3534 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 02:48:01
February 20 2011 02:46 GMT
#17
I really had a good time imagening how the OP was coming up with those jokes.
On a more serious note, and also to contribute to the topic: your momma's so fat, it takes two motherships to cloak her.

Edit:
24.a protoss said i need ot make this unit faster and chronoboosted the building

really? I mean... REALLY?
currently rooting for myself.
apm66
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada943 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 02:50:59
February 20 2011 02:49 GMT
#18
You ruined my saturday night. I didn't laugh, not even a smile on my face. You're no where near being a comedian! Back to the drawing board dude!

A baneling walks into bar.
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
Chicane
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7875 Posts
February 20 2011 02:50 GMT
#19
I'm pretty sure the only joke is that this thread is terrible. He couldn't even spell check Starcraft... I assume it is intentional... but you never know.
imPERSONater
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States1324 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-20 02:52:40
February 20 2011 02:50 GMT
#20
Yeah, I'm not one to tear people down. But there aren't punchlines here, just statements...... and that makes them mildly funny :D

26.Theres two types of people in this world...People who do good in tournaments and huk.

This is the closest thing to a joke and it isn't even accurate xD
Fan of: IdrA, Sen, Stephano, Snute, Axlav, Hero
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