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I really don't know where I'm going with this. Just writing down whatever sounds like how I feel.
Damn it, I'm at home bored because I have "nothing" to do. What I mean by that is, sure, I could DotA with my friends, I could play some SC, or go out and bike but that isn't what I want to do.
Anyone else have two groups of friends? In my case there's a "nerdier" group that currently DotAs pretty much all day long. The other "cooler" group actually goes out and does stuff. Problem is, I'm free to join in on DotA anytime I want, but I just don't want to waste my summer away on computer games. And even though I would gladly go out with the cool group, I'm just not as accepted by them. They never bother asking me to go out like they used to.
I used to be pretty close to this group, but then there was a falling out. First, near the end of Sophomore year, one of the girls in the group told me how she felt about me. Unfortunately, I didn't feel the same way about her so things became sort of awkward. After that, I left XC and T&F Junior year and hung out more with my church-going friends at school. As a result, I became more and more distant from them. However, at the end I realized that I wanted to be with them, so I started eating lunch/etc with the cool group.
I guess it was too late because I still don't really get invited out to too many events, only to find out about them through friends or afterwards. I know it's immature or stupid, but I feel sad and bitter just finding out about it.
My own interpretation is that I want to break out of my norms. For so long I've always stuck with my own bubble and was too lazy to hang out. Now that I want to go and experience things outside of my house, I don't have the same opportunities to do so.
Sad thing is, I can only blame myself. I was indecisive and couldn't decide on who I wanted to associate myself with. And now I'm stuck in the middle, and I feel aloof in both groups. It's a good thing college is coming up and a new chance for me to find where I want to be. Even though XC and T&F Senior year was a great time for me to get back with my friends, I'm still too distant from them outside of it.
On a different note:
Does anyone else wish that they could have music that matches the mood always playing in the background?
Poll: Background music?
(Vote): Yes
(Vote): No
I've always hated having to pick music I want to hear. It's always nice to hear some good music playing in the background that fits the situation/mood. I guess it's sort of like in movies, and by having to pick the music it becomes an "artificial" moment. I'd much rather have it spontaneous.
 
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On June 25 2009 13:28 BanZu wrote:On a different note: Does anyone else wish that they could have music that matches the mood always playing in the background? http://www.teamliquid.net/userpoll/add_poll.phpI've always hated having to pick music I want to hear. It's always nice to hear some good music playing in the background that fits the situation/mood. I guess it's sort of like in movies, and by having to pick the music it becomes an "artificial" moment. I'd much rather have it spontaneous.
lol omg yes! It's so awesome when the song you felt like listening to just happens to come up on the shuffle or radio.
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The music thing would be pretty awesome, but it would be better if you can change it anytime you want as well, and put it back on automatic later. Well, actually I guess that wouldn't work because it would automatically change it to the song you want anyway. Hmmmmmmm.
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Well no wonder you're conflicted, DotA will cause terrible terrible damage to anyone who takes it serious.
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Dude, I'm going through the exact same things; although the groups are slightly more varied in a sense. I honestly have no answers as to what to do. Growing up is fucking lame. But, I guess the "cool" group isn't too interested in hanging out with you anymore. My advice would to discover new hobbies and work yourself into them. As for me, I play basketball, rock climb, play sc, and play music, you're able to meet plenty of people that way. Anywho, I sympathize with you, if that helps any.
As for the music, here is a list of bands that I've liked listening to lately, even though I have absolutely no idea what you like listening to. Some of it is especially good for a depressing mood, if that's what you're looking for at least.
American Football
Band of Horses
Boards of Canada
Brand New
Broken Social Scene
Built To Spill
Cap'n Jazz
Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
Explosions In The Sky(I'd really recommend this)
The Get Up Kids
Minus The Bear
Pinback(another good one)
The Postal Service
Anyways, hopefully anything I said helped. Hope you like some of the music?!
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i feel like this sort of thing happens alot over the summer; you spend the whole school year waiting for it to end and then when summer comes, you get bored in a week. last summer i spent a whole month on the couch depressed before i managed to get myself out and doing stuff.
my suggestion is that if you are bored, find a job. if you can't find a job, commit yourself to a project and treat it like a job. learn an instrument, learn a new language, etc. you'd be surprised how much you can accomplish in one summer if you commit your time to it. even if you split 6 hours a day between two projects, you still have plenty of time to hang out with friends on evenings and weekends. the point is, if you can't enjoy yourself now, do something that you will be thankful that you spent your time doing. at least when you look back on your summer, you can say "it wasn't that great, but at least i can do this now", rather than, "it wasn't that great".
It may not seem like it now, but you still have a lot of time to have fun in your life. take advantage of the time you have now.
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I pretty much always do have background music to suit my mood. Love 80 gigs of music space <3
Man, I wouldn't worry too much about it. If you want to hang out with them, just be a little self-confident and make plans with them. I mean, take the hint if they really don't like you anymore, but they probably just feel like you want to do your own thing.
To be honest though, I think you're idealizing what they're doing. That shit's pretty boring and mostly full of insecure people and cliques. Then again, I'm a bit of a sociopath.
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EPT
