EPTActually I was supposed to meet that girl I was talking about in my other blog “so…..” I met her several times before but she was always with a friend, so I couldn’t talk to her about the things I wanted to talk about. If you’ve read my other blog, then you know what I’m talking about. I called her to see if we were still going to hang out after her class ended but she didn’t pick up. During the third or fourth time I tried to call her, she answered it, but it wasn’t her voice. I think it was her boyfriend’s voice. I immediately hung up and that just told me that she’s probably freaked out by my persistence to hang out with her, and probably thinks of me as “weird” or creepy now. I’m surprised by this because all I wanted was to talk to her. Not so bad right? So wtf? She probably thought I was going to do something to her, but I’m not that kind of person. Last night I asked her if she wanted to go to the movies with me. She may have thought I was hitting on her; I only asked because I had an extra ticket. It really surprises me that she would think of me like this. It reminds me of my friend who thought that this one guy was creepy because he was really persistent. Guys can’t be persistent or they’ll be creepy, or worse yet desperate, right? I’m afraid she’ll start avoiding me and we’ll never get to say the things we want to say to each other. I don’t want things to get left unsaid, and regret it in the future asking myself “what if….” So I felt needed to get out of my shell and start owning the world and try to set up a meeting with her to confront her about some issues. But I guess she got freaked out and hid behind her boyfriend. Wtf….. This just confuses me. When I start to gain confidence in myself and start making friends and able to talk casually to other people, she does this to me. Great timing huh? She may not be doing this intentionally, she may have been driving when I called her, but she didn’t even call back this time……
So while watching The Shining, I noticed a few things. One, I noticed Wendy was a total bitch. While many may not agree with me on this, I think Wendy was the biggest of source of Jack’s insanity. Wendy was one of the worst women you can have for a wife. She’s inconsiderate about her husband’s feelings and his work, and she’s not attractive at all, in my opinion. If you couple that with Jack’s problem with commitment to his work, then you’ve got a little time bomb that just needs its little red button pushed. I sympathize with Jack especially because his wife is a total douche. The ghosts didn’t even have anything to do with the movie. They were just there for special effects. It may just be me but I think the actresses took the screaming thing a little too far. AND Wendy wore Uggz. Eww….
After watching the movie, I think I can relate to Jack in the way that he’s as lonely as me. No one even his most beloved wife sees the hard work he puts into his family and work. He just wants approval from the people he loves most, like I want approval. Wendy doesn’t understand that because she’s too busy broing it up.
Maybe I’m just as insane as Jack. Maybe I think too much. maybe i just selfish and misunderstanding. maybe im still the naive little 8th grader i once was. maybe im jsut a late bloomer destined to be sheltered, staying young while the rest of the world moves on, becoming more degraded and obsolete. im already insane writing this and listening to your comments in a public forum. people i will never know, never get to know! maybe my brains a little chemically imba. maybe i just need to cool down. move on and see what i can find. i just wana be like those buff guys in the magazines. they get all the girls. maybe im just a horny pervert, but too nice to ever get any. sometimes i wonder if He meant for this to happen, or if it's all my fault. maybe i just need a scapegoat.com
edit: she imed me on aim and told me she hung out with her friend who came down from san diego. and she ddint have her phone. wat a fkn trip.........................
