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A Series of Unfortunate Events

Blogs > IntoTheWow
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IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32277 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-07-13 06:19:53
July 13 2008 05:57 GMT
#1
[image loading]

This story is not related to the movie or the book in any sort of way. They are just victims of my marketing abilities


When I was a kid, I had a Nintendo. On a sunny Saturday, I sat in front of the TV to play Megaman 2. At that time, 13 or so years back, most of the games came directly from Japan, with their audience on mind. It was not but several years after that the video game industry realized that the western hemisphere was not ready to handle the "reward/punish" system that the nippon no hito folk had for their games. A typical player from Occident wants the penalty for losing to be, in a worst case scenario, a grimace. For the Japanese to make a mistake in a game should be as distressful as losing a baby, in your father's death anniversary.

Megaman 2 is not an exception. I remember one of my friends saying: "When I'm older I'm going to marry a girl that tells me she finished Megaman 2 with all the power ups". The dificulty is legendary, and that sunny Saturday morning I had decided I would finish it.

In a spontaneous show of my stupidity that flourished as the first hairs in my armpit, I chose to not write down any password, a token of consideration the game offered after each "boss" so as not to start all over. My plan was to finish the game that day, no matter the consequences.

[image loading]

:D


Many hours went by, and I had already skipped dinner when I reached the last part. In front of me, in all its glory and power, the one and only, the "Final Boss". I had no lives left. I closed my eyes. I prayed. I really prayed. I begged my Lord and my Savior to finish this fucking game. I opened my eyes. Power went down. I stayed there, both hands grappling the Joystick, in front of the TV in despair. Power went up again. I had no time to curse, I just screamed in agony.


Two months ago my internet started working like shit (or should I say not working?). You have no idea what I had to go trough to be able to post this. It was not as bad as that fatal saturday, but damn it comes close.

As soon as I detected the deficiency in my service, I called tech support to as for a technician to come and check everything. After writing all my data down, they told me they would call me to tell me when the technician would come.

Days passed by without any news. I called again to claim for the service to come. This time they gave me a date: 26 of Never. Of course they weren't that explicit, they disguised it as 26th of May, and I, filled with hope, believed them. Weeks went by and I waited like a kid on Christmas for the technician to arrive. Please remember that I was at my house without internet, waiting in this case mean literally that: waiting. The most exciting thing that could happen on a day was probably ordering pizza, asking them to put extra cheese on it, because if I have to pay an extra 2$ for more cheese, you know how I am, I can't resist cheese. It was 2 in the afternoon on the 26th of May.

I called tech support again. They informed me that the technician was running late, a detail I had not a hard time guessing, and that he would be at my house later on the same day. Didn't have much to do, so I just waited again.

At 1900 I started to get worried, called again and the bad news arrived.

[image loading]

(:


Some days after a girl called and gave me a new date: Never Again - Never Ever - Never more of June. As I could not wait that long, I decided to get help from the internets, which is sort of like a reverse bat sign. I called a technician from another company. From that moment on, a battle between two companies started. Both of them, like two princes in a kingdom where there is only one tower, and I, combing my hair against the wind, waiting for one of them to come over, while I wondered why in my metaphors I was a beautiful princess.

Of course these two princes could care less about me and the stupid tower, which by the way, had no internet access. With all these happenings, it had been more than 1 month without internet. And I, being a kid from the generation that saw the internet be born, went back for the time being to shitty series re-runs like "Suddenly Susan" and softcore porn movies on unknown cable channels.

A week after, someone called me at 8am. It was a girl from my ISP asking if it was ok for them to come that week to fix my internet connection. "Is the pope catholic?" I asked. Which is like saying Yes.

[image loading]

A mermaid trying to catch a pass from a shotgun formation makes more sense that this story


On the same day, someone knocked on my door. It was the technician himself asking if he could come in to fix my problem. "Does the pope wear a funny hat?" I asked. Which is like saying Yes.

Today I am a free man again. I' connected to the internets again, today... a new blog entry.

*****
Moderator<:3-/-<
SayaSP
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Laos5494 Posts
July 13 2008 06:00 GMT
#2
This... This is amazing.
[iHs]SSP | I-NO-KI BOM-BA-YE | のヮの http://tinyurl.com/MLIStheCV , MLIS.
Bockit
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Sydney2287 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-07-13 06:03:48
July 13 2008 06:03 GMT
#3
Ninjas, thous...

...



OT: Sounds like your internet guys are like telstra internet guys (my internet guys). 26th of never is a good point. Glad to see it's all fixed though.

Think of this as a 2nd coming.
Their are four errors in this sentance.
Night[Mare
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
Mexico4793 Posts
July 13 2008 06:06 GMT
#4
megaman 2 is such an awesome game. props to you
Teamliquidian townie
SonuvBob
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
Aiur21549 Posts
July 13 2008 06:11 GMT
#5
All that time without Internet and you didn't go back and beat MM2?
Administrator
IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32277 Posts
July 13 2008 06:12 GMT
#6
On July 13 2008 15:11 SonuvBob wrote:
All that time without Internet and you didn't go back and beat MM2?


The internet killed single player mode for me.
Moderator<:3-/-<
SonuvBob
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
Aiur21549 Posts
July 13 2008 06:17 GMT
#7
BUT YOU HAD NO INTERNET

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LET DOWN I WAS WHEN I REACHED THE END OF THE STORY AND YOU HADN'T BEATEN MEGAMAN?!!
Administrator
IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32277 Posts
July 13 2008 06:18 GMT
#8
I still have nightmares about that saturday, how can you blame me!!!
Moderator<:3-/-<
zOula...
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States898 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-07-13 06:20:12
July 13 2008 06:19 GMT
#9
On July 13 2008 15:11 SonuvBob wrote:
All that time without Internet and you didn't go back and beat MM2?


i thought thats where this blog was going the whole time

5/5
Pellucidity
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
Netherlands377 Posts
July 13 2008 06:28 GMT
#10
I love you <3 Welcome back to the world of the interwebz.
"NO MUCH. WHY ARE YOUR SCARABS SO STUPID" - Tasteless
LosingID8
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
CA10828 Posts
July 13 2008 06:28 GMT
#11
lol i love your writing style!

sad to hear about megaman 2 thought T_T
ModeratorResident K-POP Elitist
Last Romantic
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States20661 Posts
July 13 2008 06:29 GMT
#12
s2
ㅋㄲㅈㅁ
H
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
New Zealand6138 Posts
July 13 2008 06:33 GMT
#13
I remember playing Sonic 2 when there was a powercut. I cried SALTY TEARS OF RAGE because of my lost progress. I ended up beating it though. You should do the same.
[iHs]HCO | のヮの | pachi & plexa ownz | RIP _
Ilikestarcraft
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Korea (South)17730 Posts
July 13 2008 06:42 GMT
#14
than how did you postt when you had no internet?
"Nana is a goddess. Or at very least, Nana is my goddess." - KazeHydra
IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32277 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-07-13 06:46:26
July 13 2008 06:46 GMT
#15
Cafe

edit: net cafe
Moderator<:3-/-<
Ilikestarcraft
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Korea (South)17730 Posts
July 13 2008 06:56 GMT
#16
ah

Now you can be on more !!!
"Nana is a goddess. Or at very least, Nana is my goddess." - KazeHydra
Mastermind
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
Canada7096 Posts
July 13 2008 07:36 GMT
#17
On July 13 2008 15:06 RtS)Night[Mare wrote:
megaman 2 is such an awesome game. props to you

yes, that game is great.
XCetron
Profile Joined November 2006
5226 Posts
July 13 2008 07:40 GMT
#18
4/5 since you didnt finish mm2
Harem
Profile Joined November 2007
United States11391 Posts
July 13 2008 08:01 GMT
#19
On July 13 2008 16:40 XCetron wrote:
4/5 since you didnt finish mm2

He couldn't defeat Airman.
Moderator。◕‿◕。
Naib
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Hungary4843 Posts
July 13 2008 10:04 GMT
#20
On July 13 2008 15:17 SonuvBob wrote:
BUT YOU HAD NO INTERNET

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LET DOWN I WAS WHEN I REACHED THE END OF THE STORY AND YOU HADN'T BEATEN MEGAMAN?!!


Same here, disappointed ; [ You really should of beaten Megaman 2!
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