EPTWell, let me start with April 11, epic day #1.
April 11:
There's a first for everything.
Friday. Thank the God(s) that it's Friday, the best day of the week. I wake up to my alarm clock, looking forward to this day for some odd reason. I don't feel like showering due to laziness, so I just go to my alarm clock-which reads 6:05 a.m. now- and set the alarm to 6:35 a.m. for some more sleepy time-horrible habit, I don't recommend you do it.
I awake, yet again, to the annoying buzzer of my alarm clock and head over and turn it off. My hair gets greasy if I don't shower, but, it gets sexier, so, sometimes I don't shower intentionally just to get that sexy look. I turn on my hair straightener and while I wait for it to heat up, browse myspace/chat with randoms on MSN. Once I'm done, I grab my phone, my wristband, my powerbands, other random bracelets my friends have given me, my chain, put my vans on, put my pants on, my belt, and hoodie and wait for my mom/sister and get in the passenger side of my car and await school. As I sit there, enjoying the car ride for some unknown reason, I wait for a message from a special someone, the 8th grader. You might know her from my 3rd blog, well, we have a "weird" relationship so to speak. Let me explain further:
The 8th grader
I met her on myspace about 2 months ago. It was a weird way of meeting, actually, we would post bulletins like comments to each other and then I just started to talk with her through messages and then through comments then back through messages again and we'd give each other equal amounts of picture comments, same old same old myspace stuff. I just saw her as a "myspace friend", nothing else. She then added me on MSN, telling me she wanted to get to know me better because she's seen and heard of me. I asked from where and she said her friends would talk of me since I was in band, saying I was "that one hot emo guy" and "the trombone dude!" and "the weird guy with the long hair" to list a few. We would talk on MSN a lot, no big, just random conversations, we realized we had a lot in common-like most do often realize- so we decided to take it a step further. She gives me her phone number but we don't call... we text each other. We end up texting each other lightly the first day, around 50 or so text messages sent by me, 50 or so received. I didn't have unlimited texting but I had never texted so it wasn't a big deal... the 8th grader was an experienced texter and would reply to my messages extremely fast while I was barely starting to get use to it and could not find most of the letters... much like re-learning to type.
Just to summarize things, we end up texting each other so much it just became routine to do it so we both just text each other hardcore now, like 100-200 texts a day, during school, after school, in the morning, etc. We then stopped texting a lot since now we call each other.
Back to the epicness...
I get through school, texting the 8th grader-who I am in love with, forgot to mention- after school and tell her about my plans for today, Friday. At one point, after texting so much, we started calling each other instead, so, during school, since we obviously can't call each other, we text, and after school we mostly talk on the phone. Everytime we hang up, though, she texts me saying she wants to hear my voice and that talking with me is awesome. I always tell her the same. Well, my friends and I had a plan for today, we were going to try Peyote for the first time(some cactus you eat and makes you hallucinate...) and weed for the first time as well, so we were all excited. We heard that Peyote tastes really bitter so we went to the family center in the city to pick up some drinks, me buying a white tea! :D
All of a sudden, my phone vibrates. I don't see that it's a text message though, it's a phone call. It's the 8th grader. I answer and ask what's up. She says she's home alone for 2 hours... I ask if she's hinting at something, she's like "OBVIOUSLY!" and I ask if I can go over. She says of course, but you'll have to find my house ;D!
I drive nearby, still talking with her, asking her where the fuck she lives, she just gives me hints, trying to make a game out of it. Alright, I get bored of driving around so me and my friends ghost ride. Little did we know we ghost rided right in front of her house and she started laughing her ass off randomly and that's when I knew. She tells me she doesn't want my friends to be there(oh, you know where this is going) and I tell her okay and give the keys to my friend and they drive off. This is where it starts...
Epic Day #1
She goes outside, we meet, I hug her, she's really shy so she is really excited to see me but it doesn't show. I just smile and laugh and poke her and etc just to get the nervousness out of her and it works. She gets more comfortable around me. She takes me inside and I look around her house, we joke around and shit while we're at it, me hiding in random closets and popping out, saying "Wait, that wasn't a restroom, was it?" and stupid shit like that. We sit in the kitchen and talk and I just yell out "MAKE ME A SAMMICH" and we laugh our assess off(inside joke). It's all fun, we then go into the living room and sit down.
I saw she was still nervous since she was shaking so I sit REALLY close to her... she blushes hardcore but then accepts it and kind of rests her head against my shoulder. We're just sitting really close so, me being the romantic I am, say "Hey, let's pretend we're watching a movie!" and I wrap my arm around her. We start giggling hardcore but then we joke around, me saying "Ah shit, this movie sucks, brb going to get popcorn" and me getting up but her dragging me back down next to her. To be honest, if she was nervous, I was her nervousnessx20, I had seriously NEVER done this kind of stuff with a girl before, EVER. My heart was beating extremely fast, but, for some reason, it just felt so awesome being with her. It's like we connected so much, positive to a negative, plug into slot, peanut butter to jelly. When we text each other or call I always tell her I want to hang out with her and we did, but, this time, it was just me and her alone. I tell her "What's that over there ;D?" and when she turns I kiss her on the cheek. She just giggles hardcore and she's like, whoops, I dropped something, can you get that for me?" and when I "pretend" to get something and lean forward she kisses me on the cheek as well. I literally just melt that instant, I tell her my heart is beating extremely fast and she gets my hand and puts it on her chest and I feel her heart beat as well. It was a wonderful moment.
She shows me her phone and I see this foil heart and I'm like "Oh, who's is that?" She pulls out of her pocket the heart and gives it to me... I take it and just love it. I take out the starburst she gave me and give it to her... she also loves it. I then take out a drawing, I also give it to her. She gives me one of her bracelets and I give her one of my powerbands, a red one. I had to leave already and her parents were already coming back, but it seriously felt like time had stopped. I had once told her that my teacher told me that, in order to be mentally stable, one has to get 8 hugs a day. It can be from the same person, one right after the other as well, or from 8 different people. I had told her I had 0 hugs today and she said the same, so we hugged each other 8 times, the last one being the most special since we didn't let go for a long time. I make a "<3" sign with my hands and she does too and I connect it with hers and she tells me she loves me and I said the same as I headed out the door.
I felt so awesome special super fucking sweet that moment, it was the happiest I had ever felt in my entire life. I was seriously smiling my ass off, my friends were wondering if I had "gotten some" but I just told them I had done stuff with her that I had never done with any other girl. Seriously, I had never "cuddled" with anyone, gave anyone anything, told anyone I had loved them, have someone tell me they loved me, done something romantic with someone, kissed someone(even if it was just on the cheek). So much stuff happened that day, April 11, I was just so happy. The rest of the day wasn't as epic as this moment, so, I won't bother writing it, I'll just summarize: I went with friends, got high on weed, left the Peyote for another day, texted while high, called and told her I loved her, lots and lots and lots of times, went to sleep. I smiled in my sleep, probably hardcore, and I dreamed an awesome dream(which I forgot instantly... sigh T.T).
It's funny how, in all of the days I have lived, that one day surpasses every other. I had never really cared for anything and that day was just an explosion of awesomeness, from when I woke up to when I climbed into my sheets again. No moment was bad, I was happy the entire day. It felt awesome.
[Somewhat]Epic Day #2
I would have included April 12, 2008 as epic day #2(I was, actually), but, that day wasn't as epic, but still was pretty epic. Party happened, stuff happened, I called her a lot, it was awesome. Etc, etc, text messages now had feeling behind them, every text I got made me get a special feeling inside of me. I included this date because this was the day which signaled the downfall...
I don't want to say the entire story(really long), but, something stupid happened when we were ghost riding and my door ended up not being able to close so we had to tape it up. I got pissed off hardcore but, I go to the party and forget everything. This would have been an epic day if it wasn't for what happened when we were Ghost Riding... that seriously ALMOST ruined the party for me. I didn't care, though, I was high and drunk in the end and I got to drive while Drigh so it was all fun. On to the downfall...
Downfall
Sunday, April 13, 2008. I wake up and see I have 3 text messages. Read them, call her, talk with her, tell her I need to hang up because friends are coming over, friends come over, I notice she hasn't texted back. I text and no response, I then try calling her. She answers and tells me "Can I call you later" and I say sure. I get worried, hardcore, for some odd reason. I'm thinking she is just busy or something, but, all these thoughts were racing through my mind. I couldn't help but just stare at my phone and wait. An hour passed so I just give up and put my phone in my pocket. I get really worried, so I go online and check to see if her sister is online on myspace. She is, so I ask her where her sister is. She tells me she's in her room, on the phone. I just meltdown. I don't know why but I just feel REALLY awkward. Who could she be with on the phone? She then texts back and I call her, she starts acting really weird. I ask what's wrong and she just says "nothing is wrong" but, just the way she said it meant there was something wrong. I keep asking but she says she is annoyed. I tell her where she was and she's like "oh, on the phone." Thing is, I couldn't BRING myself to asking her who she was talking to so I just start acting really weird. She then gets worried about me and starts asking what's wrong with me and I start singing lyrics to system of a down's "this cocaine makes me feel like I'm on this song." THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH ME THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME I HOPE YOUR STEP SON DOESN'T EAT THE FISH! There's something wrong with me? There's something wrong with you!
She gets WEIRDED out and I just hang up. She tries calling but I just answer and make noises and hang up afterwards.
Argh, lost motivation, I'll write it later. Summary: She loves me more than her ex but her ex still loves her and she doesn't want to hurt her ex because they never really broke up and she now loves me so we put things on halt. Sunday+Monday, shittiest days for me, I was just depressed. I went from being happy on Friday to being happy the majority of the day saturday to being SHITTY all sunday and SHITTIER monday.
Thanks for reading, even if I would stop at random points while writing this and wrote some parts of this feeling differently. <3
.
![[image loading]](http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/772/lilsispool2006yo0copyem3.jpg)
