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Edit: I didn't mean to come off as complaining or b*tchy. This entry is not meant to be a rant (I wouldn't change being a girl gamer for anything), but something fun for us to discuss.
There are many pros and cons to being a female gamer on bnet. I think it is safe to say that a female gamer will generally get treated a lot differently than male gamers, in several different ways.
I must admit that I have tried in the past to keep my gender unkown to avoid having to deal with some of those issues, but I found it deceptive and difficult to have a close relationship with people on my friend list, having to avoid discussing various aspects about myself and my life. There was definately a noticeable difference in how I was treated, though, when I was assumed to be a guy.
I must admit that more than not, I do enjoy being a female gamer, even welcoming some of the negative attention I get a lot. I have learned to ignore the things that bother me, and laugh at most of the various things people say.
The most common response I get is disbelief. There are a lot of people who think that females who play Starcraft simply do not exist. I think that people are more likely to accept girls playing MMO's or even FPS games, but to think that a girl would have any enjoyment playing an RTS game just seems to be beyond a lot of people. Congratulations, I have now just become an object of hate, disgust, and a target for ridicule and various name calling from people I have only just met upon stating my gender. The insults ensue: shim, shemale, etc. The fact that almost everyone on bnet has known at least one male who has posed as a female either personally or through popular news floating around on websites such as TL does not help the situation. I can especially remember, right before I went on my internet hiatus, the 'Zia scandal'. The disbelief of my fellow gamers became even more frequent and harsh during that time, and I was often called a 'Zia wannabe', one of the few insults that really bothered me.
Afterwards, people want to see "proof". It does no benefit to either parties, this "trying to prove yourself", but it can be very bothersome when people continue to give you trouble and make you out to be dishonest. I oftentimes find myself wanting to just prove it and get it over with so we can move on to something else. Half the time the accuser rejects any kind of proof you attempt to provide. A picture can be taken from anywhere off the internet. I have even found myself responding to the "if you are really a girl, then call me and let me hear your voice." This happened on two occasions. The first person responded with "Oh sh*t, you really are a girl!" and the second with "Dude, I still don't believe you, that was your little sister." There really is no winning in the latter situation and I have learned that it is a futile waste of my time to try to prove myself. Yet I still find myself trying to do so, wishing people would believe me and accept me for who I am. I have often found myself wanting to respond with "prove to me you are a guy". It makes me think of how unnecessary it is.
Another type of person is the kind who believes you are a female, or pretends to just for humors sake. They oftentimes ramble with endless insults such as "b*tch, whore, cunt" and remarks such as "f*ck you," "go make me a sandwhich," "get in the kitchen and wash my dishes," "get over here and suck my cock," or "hey babe, wanna cyber?" Before there was any mention of my gender, I would be treated like everyone else, but I immediately become a target of unmerited hatred.
My response to those two types of people? I never retaliate. I "" and "lol". I will often start talking about the game (if we are obbing) or ask them questions about themselves, or ignore them and make unrelated comments as if they never said anything. I think that for me this is the easiest way to deal with it. I believe being bm back will just egg them on. I do not like having enemies. I refuse to be bm to anyone for any reason. The result is usually the same. If I continue to have contact with the person, they have usually added me to their friend list within a few days or hours. I like it this way.
But sometimes I wonder if this is weird. Why would I want to have any kind of relationship with anyone who was so degrading to me at one point? I sometimes wonder if it is best to defend myself, rather than trying to charm my way into being treated like a human being. I become aware of these questions mostly when my boyfriend or younger brother witness the name calling. I will become aware of what is actually being said and how terrible it is. I realize that I am letting it happen and merely just smiling back at their remarks and even trying to be their friends. I don't usually realize that they are doing anything wrong because it is so common that I have just accepted it as normal. My boyfriend gets VERY angry when he sees how people treat me on bnet and also gets angry at me for not doing anything about it. He will ask me questions like, "Why are you still in this game?", "Why are you hanging around with these people?" I oftentimes feel like I really don't have a choice. I might as well not play the game, or ever go on bnet, because it happens everywhere I go.
The thing that bothers me the most, is when people say I only got something I wanted because I'm a girl. Comments like "You only got into that team because you're a girl" really make me angry. Of course I will adamently deny any such thing, but in my mind I begin to think, "What if he's right? What if they only let me in because I'm a girl?" I cannot stand the thought of that. That and people going easy or letting me win because I am a girl. It it the most insulting thing you could do or say to me.
It isn't all bad though, and for me the good points outweigh the bad, because I try not to let things bother me. If people aren't cussing me out for no reason, they are usually very friendly with me. I hate to admit that I enjoy the positive attention I oftentimes get. I stand out because I am different from everyone else. People notice me and remember me and want to get to know me. People seem more likely to want to give me tips when I ask or even train me, and I definately need all the help I can get. When I am in a team I am usually loved and am treated slightly special. People want to stick up for me. Of course, that is because I am usually the only girl among all those guys. I also like to think that a lot of it is due to my personality, but it would be too much to hope that they only treated me that way because of my pleasant personality.
Probably the best thing about being a girl on bnet for me is the very fact that people do not expect me to know how to play the game. They do not usually expect me to be especially good, so when I lose I can at least have the consolation that I didn't go below anyones expectations of me. But even better is when I do win, and people realize that they have just been beaten at their own game by a girl. It is very devastating to many people and I relish in the "I can't believe I just lost to a girl." On the opposite end, I sometimes feel pressure to prove myself as being just as capable to play regardless of my gender, and to "represent" female gamers. It can also be slightly annoying when the "omg I lost to a girl" comments go on and on. Just last night, I went on vent for the first time with a team I am planning on joining. I was playing on of their members, and everyone was obbing, and there was lots of, "Dude, if you lose to a girl I am going to laugh so hard." What's the big deal?
I admit that I am guilty to some of the things I have mentioned above when I meet someone on bnet who claims to be a girl. I can also be very skeptical, though I would never voice that opinion because I would be doing the exact same thing that people do to me. I also feel that if they really are a girl, they must not be very good, and that I should be able to beat them. When I lose to a girl, I am very surprised and angry. I feel like I should not lose to girls, even though I am one. Perhaps that is a reason why I am so forgiving with people, because I can't help but be affected by those same stigmas and can relate to some of the feelings they have. I also tend to want to protect and help along other girls as long as they seem good mannered.
I am sorry for being so long winded, but thanks for bearing with me till the end. I hope you found it somewhat interesting. Feel free to ask me any questions or discuss the topic.
Are there any other girls out there who feel differently than I do? Or the same? And of course to guys who have had experience posing as a girl. I know there are a lot of you. ;] Ever lost to a girl? Ever met a girl on bnet? Discuss discuss anything related!
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Netherlands4511 Posts
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I can relate to you very much! I'm a female gamer myself, and I too get that nobody believes me. Therefore I just claim to be a guy.
But I totally understand why nobody believes it. I think there's at least 10 fakers for every real girl out here.
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Am I the only one who does not understand a desire to have a close relationship with people who I've never met in real life?
The reason for your troubles is of course ultimately that people as a whole (though not as individuals) are idiots - cruel idiots at that. Why should you end up even discussing your personal life with people you can never evaluate in person?
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Belgium8305 Posts
i, too, share your plight
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Nobody trusts 'girls' on teamliquid since the Zia incident. Haha.
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Anyone who frames you with that kind of mindset is either: very young and naive, close minded and/or very stupid. A game is a game and everyone can play, especially when it comes to SC. BTW what team are you part of?
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ret: Thanks, now that that's aside.. Navane: Good to see another girl gamer. And you're zerg, too. :D
Freyr: It's part of what keeps me interested in gaming. When I'm not in a team or have a group of friends around me I have less urge to continue to play.
vGl-CoW: Let us cry together. T-T Shauni: Yeah, I know. I'll just deal with it. Zalfor: NO's!
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Protip: It's the internet
No seriously, when i realised my bw tutor was in fact a 15 years old Korean girl, i was so confused and all i could say was: "No way, no girls on internet etc..." But then i went over it, and everything is fine
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Oh quit your bitching. 90% of guys on bnet will automatically start sucking up to you because they think they have some obscure chance of getting a girl to like them online. Isnt that how zia managed to get into good clans without even being that good?
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Hum, seriously, there are decent people out there you won't act like a bunch of assholes. Just don't socialize with the idiots. If you accept and even encourage unacceptable behaviour, you will just get more of it. The only way to not be surrounded by assholes on the Internet is to avoid them.
Everybody gets lots of silly insults thrown after them - girls more than most, maybe, but that just makes it that more important to not hang around with the jerks.
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Eh, just ignore it. My sister just laughs at people who say shit like that when she owns them in team fortress 2 =p
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nice read, lets go 1v1 sometime MUAHAHH beat me at my own game i like it *wink wink* jk anyway all the female players i met just play fastest and money maps or ums ive probably lost games to girls in disguise but ehh what can you do
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On March 09 2008 02:21 dronebabo wrote: i am a troll.
little error there db, i fixed it for you
good blog, finally no iccup blog: chill will be happy
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HotZhot: Yeah, that is very true. Um, I was thinking about joining team [shock] on West. I have no idea what skill they are... I just like joining active, fun teams.
dronebabo: Cool.
::Snuggles Hittegods and hugs Obama.::
Oglop: Heh, nice.
decafchicken: I'm not really whining, did you even read all of my post? I merely want to share with you guys and hear about other's experiences. And on that zia comment, yes, I think so. That's what my friend in oG) said, anyways.
Zherak: Yeah, but a lot of people act like that initially. Most of them stop after a while, and if they don't then of course I'll just ignore them. And actually, from my experience, smiling it off (not really 'accepting it') will speed up the process of them stopping, while 'defending myself' seems to just encourage them. All they want is a response and some fun.
Hawk: Yeahh, I ignore it and it's all cool.
ShmotZ: Sure, I'll 1v1 with you. ;]
Bbl, shower. Keep commenting, it's so fun to read.
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Ever lost to a girl? Ever met a girl on bnet?
Yes to both of these. One of my teachers on bnet was a girl. I hesitate to say "teacher" 'cuz mostly what she did was rape me 5 games in a row and then tell me to up my apm (she had close to 3 times my apm). She went psycho on me at some point 'cuz I left a game I was losing without saying "gg" and is no longer my teacher. The only other girls I've met on bnet were pretty bad. Prolly just playing 'cuz their boyfriend was into it and they wanted to have something in common with him.
Girls definitely get special treatment in video games-- not just starcraft. My sister plays WoW and she gets in-game presents all the time, her clan/guild thing takes her on all the cool events she can handle and offer her events she can't find time for. People she's never met from halfway across the US ask to call her, and when she likes one enough to let them, they sing songs to her and ask her to marry them, etc etc.
When a girl gets treated poorly its either out of jealousy for the special treatment they receive; to get attention from the girl they couldn't get otherwise (in my experience, girls are really good at ignoring clingy nice-guys, but they're pretty bad at ignoring BM behavior); or its for some legitimate reason (girls can be BM, too).
I'm sorry that you were born with a vagina and you like to play in communities dominated by penis. Have you tried not saying anything about your gender? If it makes no difference anyway and most of the attention you receive is unwanted, why bring it up at all? I don't tell everyone I meet online that I'm a guy.
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Good OP Niji, nice read.
P.S lol@ cow & dronebabo
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The way I see it, anyone that puts you down for being a girl is basically putting up a nice, big sign that reads "I'm a loser so don't waste your time talking to me." The idiots weed themselves out for you.
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On March 09 2008 02:59 rpf wrote:The way I see it, anyone that puts you down for being a girl is basically putting up a nice, big sign that reads "I'm a loser so don't waste your time talking to me." The idiots weed themselves out for you.
The same for those who are trying to treat girls super nice on the intarweb, like you are doing right now to gain + points with her.
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I read about half of the blog, I'll read the other half later on.
On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote:
And of course to guys who have had experience posing as a girl. I know there are a lot of you. ;]
PM Testie.
Ever lost to a girl? Numerous times, she was korean so I didn't feel that bad. But I never give girls special treatment or treat them differently from guy gamers. I know girls put up with a lot of bs and theres of course always scandals haha.
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On March 09 2008 02:12 ret wrote: you're a dude
like you'd know a girl if you saw one -_-
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On March 09 2008 02:51 Tadzio00 wrote: or its for some legitimate reason (girls can be BM, too).
Don't get me started on the girls. I've met some truly awful girls on bnet. They are sore losers and flaunt their femininity and when they win against a guy who they normally cannot they talk about it for the next month.
On March 09 2008 02:51 Tadzio00 wrote: I'm sorry that you were born with a vagina and you like to play in communities dominated by penis. Have you tried not saying anything about your gender? If it makes no difference anyway and most of the attention you receive is unwanted, why bring it up at all? I don't tell everyone I meet online that I'm a guy.
Don't be sorry, I'm not.
It's pretty hard to hide it without flat out lying. It's not like I go tell everyone I meet, "hey btw i'm a girl." For example, when people ask me my name.. I don't exactly have a name that could pass for a guy's. Or when people ask me where I'm going or what I did over the weekend, "I saw my boyfriend," is my most common response. I think going out of my way trying to hide it just isn't worth my effort. I'll take the alternative.
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same shit, different package
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It's not so bad when you lose to girls, I've simply come to accept that girls can have no lives too.
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On March 09 2008 03:02 Shauni wrote:Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 02:59 rpf wrote:The way I see it, anyone that puts you down for being a girl is basically putting up a nice, big sign that reads "I'm a loser so don't waste your time talking to me." The idiots weed themselves out for you. The same for those who are trying to treat girls super nice on the intarweb, like you are doing right now to gain + points with her. Oh, I see; I offer my opinion and suddenly I'm trying to be nice and gain points.
People like you are fucking pathetic.
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On March 09 2008 03:28 rpf wrote:Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 03:02 Shauni wrote:On March 09 2008 02:59 rpf wrote:The way I see it, anyone that puts you down for being a girl is basically putting up a nice, big sign that reads "I'm a loser so don't waste your time talking to me." The idiots weed themselves out for you. The same for those who are trying to treat girls super nice on the intarweb, like you are doing right now to gain + points with her. Oh, I see; I offer my opinion and suddenly I'm trying to be nice and gain points. People like you are fucking pathetic.
Haha. I thought you'd notice the sarcasm.
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On March 09 2008 03:26 Ozarugold wrote: It's not so bad when you lose to girls, I've simply come to accept that girls can have no lives too.
:D :D :D :D And I'm proud.
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in my experience, there aren't any decent looking girls that are actually good at SC. There may be some good looking koreans that are decent at SC, but it's a different culture over there obv. If I met you on bnet and saw you to be decent, I definitely wouldn't believe that you were a girl until I saw you on webcam or something similar.. There are just way too many posers out there, and a picture is just way too easy to fake. But you shouldn't care how people treat you on B.net anyway, not sure you realize but most people on bnet are like 12-16 yrs old. Immature would be an understatement. A lot of the older players retired or just don't play as much anymore. You'll find a lot more maturity in other games such as pay to play MMO's or FPS games where the average gamer is like 28-30 yrs old.
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On March 09 2008 02:14 Navane wrote: But I totally understand why nobody believes it. I think there's at least 10 fakers for every real girl out here.
Yeah, that's totally true. To me, it seems like being a female gamer has turned into somewhat of a joke. The reality is, there are more guys than girls and probably more guys pretending to be girls than real girls playing SC. Every time I've seen someone on Bnet say they are female, the automatic response is "REALLY???", "no way. you're a dude", or "can I fuck you?" I admit to having made the first two remarks.
Yeah, I don't really understand why people need to maintain a close relationship with people they don't know in real life either. I think it's just better to not reveal your gender at all.
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On March 09 2008 03:40 cujo2k wrote: in my experience, there aren't any decent looking girls that are actually good at SC. Oh thanks for reminding me. I forgot to mention that one. People assume I am fat and ugly. ;p
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On March 09 2008 03:26 MeriaDoKk wrote: same shit, different package or lack thereof.
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I hope you meet nice people to play with. Sucks that you get harassed. GL hf
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Belgium6738 Posts
I know of dudes who have WoW girlfriends
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I have always gotten the impression that most (not all) girls go out of their way to let everyone online know that they are in fact a girl, as soon as they join a clan/community their picture is posted like 1min after they joined. Now obviously not all girls do this but in my experience many do. it's like "hey guys :3 go easy on poor little ol' me, you see i'm a girl" *thihi, THIS will get those silly nerds to start drooling of my picture and tell me how cute i am, FUCK YEAH CONFIDENCE BOOST!* slight exaggeration of course
I have been a part of tons of communities/game clans/guilds/whatever since i first started using the internet and i don't think i have ever gotten the question "are you a guy or a girl?" when i first meet people, at least not until you really start to know the person and talk more often etc. So when he/she finally asks you that question like a couple of weeks later or so i highly doubt they would instantly start saying stuff like "suck my cock bitch" when he finds out you are a girl, unless you're really trying to let everyone know you're a girl i don't really see the problem.
On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote: Congratulations, I have now just become an object of hate, disgust, and a target for ridicule and various name calling from people I have only just met upon stating my gender.
If a guy is disgusted by a girl showing up on Starcraft he needs get his head examined, or removed.
On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote: Why would I want to have any kind of relationship with anyone who was so degrading to me at one point?
That's pretty much what it's like to be a guy in real life. You have to prove yourself worthy whenever you are the "new guy" and people will give you a hard time no matter what, but as soon as you get familiar with the people there's no problem at all. Me and my friends still mess with each other. For example, when we are out walking or something and my friend slips and fall on his head i call him a fucking dumbass and laugh, but he knows i'm not being serious about it.
On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote: The thing that bothers me the most, is when people say I only got something I wanted because I'm a girl. Comments like "You only got into that team because you're a girl" really make me angry. Of course I will adamently deny any such thing, but in my mind I begin to think, "What if he's right? What if they only let me in because I'm a girl?" I cannot stand the thought of that. That and people going easy or letting me win because I am a girl. It it the most insulting thing you could do or say to me.
You'd be surprised if you knew how some of the guys think, back when i played WoW we had a girl join our guild but she barely knew how to play the damn game, and we were a guild who was grabbing all the server first kills and stuff like that. Another example is Ragnarok back in the days, say you were pretending to be a girl and "e-marry" some dumbfuck you'd be the richest "girl" on the server in a matter of minutes, it's pathetic.
On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote: Ever lost to a girl?
Yeah, BlueIris (Art.Love) who was around here a while ago created Clan Art (the first time) and i joined and played her a few times, got raped every single game.
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Hi. You're a girl. Guys are attracted to your sex. This is a fact of life. Ever hung out with a group of guys and you're the only girl? Ya, they're gonna pay a lot of attention to you. This is what happens on the internet.
As far as I'm concerned, you're just another poster on TL. I'm more likely to try to get to know you, of course, because you're a GIRL, but for the most part I'm going to evaluate you using the same criteria I judge everybody else here: do you contribute? are you respectful? do your posts make me want to cringe?
So you're a girl. Why bring attention to that fact? Lots of girls play starcraft, enough for me to have met a few on bnet. It's common knowledge you're treated differently from guys. What's there to discuss? This is human nature. It's not exactly killing your self esteem, now is it?
Maybe this post was just too deep for me to understand. But I think it's unneeded. Which isn't to say anything about your character. I don't know you enough to judge, but I just don't see the point of this.
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On March 09 2008 02:40 Niji-z wrote:
decafchicken: I'm not really whining, did you even read all of my post? I merely want to share with you guys and hear about other's experiences. And on that zia comment, yes, I think so. That's what my friend in oG) said, anyways.
I read the first few paragraphs and got bored. It was pretty much all whining.
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I met nanogirl once
You are still a guy,
BTW if you arent a guy why do you even tell people you are a girl?
Why bother?
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Hong Kong20321 Posts
whers the pics j/k
i never knew it was bad being a girl lol
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My friend met his girlfriend in some defense UMS map on Bnet. He is hungarian, she is portuguese, and they are together for one and a half year now. :0
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I see a lot of sexism and homophobia in these forums and on battle net all the time. this comes from the official 10 commandments of posting from tl.net
"Remember: we ban little girly-kids all the time because they sign on thinking they can say and do whatever they want to whomever they want right from the get-go - just like they're used to doing at other sites."
wtf? is ok for people who are women and people who are homosexual to play computer games? we're not even physicaly in the same space. It would be really great if people thought twice before saying something was gay. and i would love it if TL.net would take some leadership on this issue and take a stance against hate-speech.
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On March 09 2008 04:08 anarchist wrote: I see a lot of sexism and homophobia in these forums and on battle net all the time. this comes from the official 10 commandments of posting from tl.net
"Remember: we ban little girly-kids all the time because they sign on thinking they can say and do whatever they want to whomever they want right from the get-go - just like they're used to doing at other sites."
wtf? is ok for people who are women and people who are homosexual to play computer games? we're not even physicaly in the same space. It would be really great if people thought twice before saying something was gay. and i would love it if TL.net would take some leadership on this issue and take a stance against hate-speech.
Dude, don't take everything so damn seriously.
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Girly-kids is referring to moronic 12 year olds who come on the forum and think it's ok to call rekrul a nazi. It has nothing to do with gays or girls.
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On March 09 2008 04:00 grobo wrote:
I have been a part of tons of communities/game clans/guilds/whatever since i first started using the internet and i don't think i have ever gotten the question "are you a guy or a girl?" when i first meet people, at least not until you really start to know the person and talk more often etc. So when he/she finally asks you that question like a couple of weeks later or so i highly doubt they would instantly start saying stuff like "suck my cock bitch" when he finds out you are a girl, unless you're really trying to let everyone know you're a girl i don't really see the problem.
Well, when you are in a game or a channel, and one person knows you're a girl, everyone else usually finds out pretty fast. Either he will say "she" when talking about you, or correct people when they say "he," or they will call me "April" which obviously gives it away also. Like I said, I gave up putting the effort into hiding it and figured I'd make the best out of it. It says my gender in my profiles and such, so I don't really mind.
Thanks so much for your long and detailed response.
RHCPgergo: That's so awesome.
Oh, and I deeply apologize to those who find this blog whiny, boring, or unnecessary. I thought it would be fun, but perhaps people aren't taking it the way I had anticipated. Just have fun with it, no need to take it too serious.
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The reaction to girls playing games really reminds me of homophobia. Just as you sometimes get hate directed your way, the most common insult on bnet (I think) is fag/gay used at hate speech. A lot of it seems totally irrational, and I don't think I can really understand it until I'm on the recieving end of such treatment. Your blog post really reminded me of this video:
+ Show Spoiler [Youtube] +
Anyway, it's cool that you don't get frustrated by any abuse that you get, more power to you.
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NeverGG
United Kingdom5399 Posts
It's way more balanced where I live - there are as many women using the pc bangs as there are men. Also as SC events there's a mixture of both genders and alot of the women/girls are very informed/play regularly. I've not had much of a problem, but I'm a rookie who hasn't used bnet (and probably won't due to a lack of time -_-)
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i've met a few girls on bnet, play with one semi-regularly. i don't think it's a big deal.
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On March 09 2008 03:50 ShaLLoW[baY] wrote:or lack thereof. hahaha well, you get the point
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On March 09 2008 04:21 CDRdude wrote:The reaction to girls playing games really reminds me of homophobia. Just as you sometimes get hate directed your way, the most common insult on bnet (I think) is fag/gay used at hate speech. A lot of it seems totally irrational, and I don't think I can really understand it until I'm on the recieving end of such treatment. Your blog post really reminded me of this video: + Show Spoiler [Youtube] +Anyway, it's cool that you don't get frustrated by any abuse that you get, more power to you. =_= Should I say or You just got fucking owned?
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On March 09 2008 03:34 Shauni wrote:Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 03:28 rpf wrote:On March 09 2008 03:02 Shauni wrote:On March 09 2008 02:59 rpf wrote:The way I see it, anyone that puts you down for being a girl is basically putting up a nice, big sign that reads "I'm a loser so don't waste your time talking to me." The idiots weed themselves out for you. The same for those who are trying to treat girls super nice on the intarweb, like you are doing right now to gain + points with her. Oh, I see; I offer my opinion and suddenly I'm trying to be nice and gain points. People like you are fucking pathetic. Haha. I thought you'd notice the sarcasm. The simple addition of a smiley face would have indicated that. It's rather difficult to pick up on tone and inflection when I'm reading your response. T_T
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I got raped by a girl who goes to my school in wc3. Good thing she doesn't know it was me ^_^
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On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote: The most common response I get is disbelief. There are a lot of people who think that females who play Starcraft simply do not exist. Sorry, that was probably me.
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On March 09 2008 04:36 Caller wrote: I got raped by a girl who goes to my school in wc3. Good thing she doesn't know it was me ^_^ Hahahahahahaha
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On March 09 2008 04:13 Niji-z wrote: Oh, and I deeply apologize to those who find this blog whiny, boring, or unnecessary. It's a blog. Is there any other kind?
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United States5262 Posts
Hiya niji. As corny as this may sound, this was very brave of you. I myself, try to do my best to be mannered to people online. Even when they act like a dick to me, I always have a small urge to just shoot back at them but that's just feeding the fire. I agree with what you said, why have a relationship with people who are assholes to you?
Sadly, the maturity level of people differs drastically. Some people will be able to see a female gamer as a peer. Others will just see a girl as a girl and that they are better than you because guys play more games. I remember back in the summer, my friend is a hardcore CvS2 player and he played a girl who was a P-groover. He said got freaking OCV-ed. But he treated her as a peer. I think because people can hide online, they can show their inner immaturity. That's just the way online gaming will always be.
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Hi Zia. Hehe.
All the best.
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On March 09 2008 04:49 jkillashark wrote: Hiya niji. As corny as this may sound, this was very brave of you. I myself, try to do my best to be mannered to people online. Even when they act like a dick to me, I always have a small urge to just shoot back at them but that's just feeding the fire. I agree with what you said, why have a relationship with people who are assholes to you?
Sadly, the maturity level of people differs drastically. Some people will be able to see a female gamer as a peer. Others will just see a girl as a girl and that they are better than you because guys play more games. I remember back in the summer, my friend is a hardcore CvS2 player and he played a girl who was a P-groover. He said got freaking OCV-ed. But he treated her as a peer. I think because people can hide online, they can show their inner immaturity. That's just the way online gaming will always be.
What do all of these acronyms mean?
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Trust me, any flak you get here for being a girl is nothing compared to what you would get in an FPS such as CS.
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You care too much what people think about say about you. Your gender is irrilevent in most thing considered starcraft. I do however sympathize with the name calling and general harrassment but what starcraft gamer hasn't been flamed or abused in a similar manner?
Rather then to view these things as something that seperates you from us, i would suggest the viewpoint that these conflicts and flame wars actaully make you more similar to the males then you relize.
Its an iniation (with the exception of the extreme's), take it on the chin deal with it and eventually you will be accepted (wither thats important to you or not is subjective)
The first few post are pretty much the general response of most blogs on here and are not specific to you because your a girl but because your a member of this community.
Welcome home slut Hell i get asked for cyber all the time too but i survive.
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omg i actually started reading and then scrolled down. too long.
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On March 09 2008 04:52 ShaLLoW[baY] wrote:Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 04:49 jkillashark wrote: Hiya niji. As corny as this may sound, this was very brave of you. I myself, try to do my best to be mannered to people online. Even when they act like a dick to me, I always have a small urge to just shoot back at them but that's just feeding the fire. I agree with what you said, why have a relationship with people who are assholes to you?
Sadly, the maturity level of people differs drastically. Some people will be able to see a female gamer as a peer. Others will just see a girl as a girl and that they are better than you because guys play more games. I remember back in the summer, my friend is a hardcore CvS2 player and he played a girl who was a P-groover. He said got freaking OCV-ed. But he treated her as a peer. I think because people can hide online, they can show their inner immaturity. That's just the way online gaming will always be. What do all of these acronyms mean?
oh so you are not into the awesome world of fighting games
cvs2 = capcom vs snk 2 p-groove=it's like another choice next to character choosing ocv=one character victory, one men kills the other team
I ' d marry the first nice girl who plays Guilty Gear, lol.
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On a side note: I dated a starcraft chick in highschool, gave the best head but had terrible micro.
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lol i click this out of curiosity
obv 4 pages of comments
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51164 Posts
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I completely agree with what you said Niji. Having experienced it myself pretty much my whole time playing SC i can relate to a lot of it. There are tons of pests in bnet though the key is to avoid the people who are going to just harass you, its not worth the time to try and convince someone who has their mind already made up about what you are. But before i go ranting on we should definitely play some time.
And to Tadzio00 i didn't care that you didn't say "gg" it was more your self-esteem and how you put yourself down after each of our games. You weren't seeing what you could actually do to better your play vs me, you just saw it as being "owned" TT and u didn't want to review the replay afterwards.
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51164 Posts
anyway watching this segment on this australian tv show showed me that its not a place where men can flap their penises around anymore.
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i agree
i got so much shit for being a girl at the last community i was in that i just gave up and didnt mention anything this time around
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the moment people start insulting you or just being bm in any way, block. if its an obs game, just continue to watch the players in question. if its a 1v1 just own them really bad ;p basically you don't need to talk to these people to enjoy sc do you? I don't think you should be putting up with stuff like that, because I know it affects you even if you think you're ignoring it or it doen't bother you. Insults have a way of creeping in. Just think 'God you must be such an idiot to behave like that', then feel superiour as you block.
As always, people should be judged as individuals, not by skin colour/gender/occupation. As always, it's difficult when the stereotypes tend to be true for a group. ie 'women are bad at starcraft' (only coz most of them don't play it :/ ) or, 'people wearing nike and hoodys are more likely to steal' people dressed like that are more likely to fall under suspicion, female starcraft players are likely to be stereotyped.
but as someone from a minority, I find that it makes it much easier to find the people I want to be friends with- they come to me, as they are the ones who don't treat me differantly in the first place.
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The great thing about the internet is anonymity. I do not see any point in pointing out your name, race, gender or age, on battle.net your just another player up for a game. I only talk about characteristics of myself after I have known the person online for quite a while.
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How do koreans treat female gamers? Usually koreans come off as very mannered to me (although maybe its just because I can't understand what they're saying, lol).
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I love how there's so many responses in this blog thread. Goes to show what kind of attention this kind of revelation attracts.
It just is difficult in any setting being in the minority where stigmas and preconceptions associated with that group are so strong. It's probably harder than most people think to be a nothing as opposed to openly being a female. Denying the truth of yourself is a difficult thing; for a guy on the internet, being male is often implicit, so there's not a strong need to affirm this assumption. I think people saying "why you bring this up" are not realizing or appreciating this facet.
The funny thing is, when people do find out at first, by gaining this knowledge about you (and I mean "you" in a general sense, although it applies to you actually), they come to understand you even less than they did before. For in their minds, you become more the mask of their preconceptions and less the fragment of a person they've seen online.
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Man, this is super interesting to me. Niji-z can react to all these things in so many ways and never really be wrong or dumb. Aside from the sorts of comments people make in their safety of anonimity, there's no reason to lie about gender. At the same time it's not entirely necessary for anybody to know gender to play a game or to have the sorts of friends you can find on the internet. (which, in my opinion, it's impossible to have the same kind of connection with people online as you can with a person you actually live with)
But theres a certain kind of, "Well, why the hell not tell people?" As far as I've seen, girls like jkillashark and mnm are treated very well, and it'd be strange for me to read their posts and not know they're girls. It all comes to the point which says "tl is simply a good online community and letting people be more of who they are lets them contribute more fully and enrich what's going on here"
I guess that's why I like TL and ended up joining the community rather than just trolling forever and feeding off of the contributions of everyone else. This is a fairly unique place which allows a diverse sampling of smart people allowed to communicate in a broader sense of how that is, not just united under starcraft (because if it was, I don't believe there would be as much real content here as there is).
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On March 09 2008 05:38 AdamBanks wrote: On a side note: I dated a starcraft chick in highschool, gave the best head but had terrible micro.
I'm guessing you were the micro of the relationship + Show Spoiler +
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Two of my friends on bnet that I play with nearly on a daily basis are girls. Ive noticed most of the time they don't like to mention their gender to new teammates. It's weird for me to because if I have to say something as simple as "Wait 2 seconds shes coming" then I out her.
Or if we're playing and then 1 of my other friends joins us and acts like a total douche, you know basicly the way guys act around eachother, I feel like I have to appoligize for him. Or on the flip side (it's OK, im bringing it back) if someones acting really BM the girls are usually quiet, so is it up to me to say something? In RL most definitely, but on bnet does that just come across as BM?
I know how it feels to be the odd "man" out. Im pretty sure 98% of the time when Im playing online its against other males. So when when its the 3 of us playing together, or maybe me vs them in a 2v2, it has a different feel. I can still remember the first time they beat me, mostly because it was the first I had ever lost to her, and I had played atleast 15 games against her at this point. You lose a little bit of freedom though, no more "gj guys" or "PWND BITCH!" when we beat a BM player. Besides our conversations that are a little different then what I would talk about if it was all guys, and what I just mentioned, it's all the same. Overall I enjoy having some female friends on bnet, its nice to mix things up, and to be honest I think girls gaming (especially BW) is hot.
One of my bnet friends actually met his current girlfriend on bnet, they've been going out for a year now. I was playing in the game with him when he was chatting her up and they decided to meet. Its almost like I was there when they first met hahaha.
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I change from 'he' to 'she', and stop discussing bizzare and disgusting porn in presense of girls. Couldn't care less about your gender online.
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Quick question, as a representative of the female gaming community, do you find it particularly offensive when someone uses terms like 'rape' to describe the outcome of a game.
Idk, it just seems to me that it would be like beating a black player and saying 'man, you just got lynched.' -(I'm not racist, just an example.)
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On March 09 2008 08:51 Lemonwalrus wrote: Quick question, as a representative of the female gaming community, do you find it particularly offensive when someone uses terms like 'rape' to describe the outcome of a game.
Great question, Ive wondered that my self.
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On March 09 2008 08:13 LeafHouse wrote: girls like jkillashark and mnm are treated very well
wut?
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MrBobby: The more people I have as friends on bnet, the more I enjoy the experience in general.
fight_or_flight: That's actually an interesting question. From my personal experience, a lot of Koreans are very manner, but also very interested in me. A lot of Koreans are rather vulgar to me, asking very sexual and grotesque questions that most foreigners would never say. Perhaps it is a cultural difference.
On March 09 2008 07:57 Myrmidon wrote: IDenying the truth of yourself is a difficult thing; for a guy on the internet, being male is often implicit, so there's not a strong need to affirm this assumption. Thanks, you summed that up pretty nicely. It's kind of hard for me to explain myself.
LeafHouse: Yes, TL seems a really great forum. I'm enjoying it so far.
On March 09 2008 08:34 bustaBust wrote: Or if we're playing and then 1 of my other friends joins us and acts like a total douche, you know basicly the way guys act around eachother, I feel like I have to appoligize for him. Or on the flip side (it's OK, im bringing it back) if someones acting really BM the girls are usually quiet, so is it up to me to say something? In RL most definitely, but on bnet does that just come across as BM? You know, I don't feel like you have to apologize for the way your friends may normally act. If your female friends are like me, especially if they are hardcore or even casual gamers, they probably act similarly with people they game with and have no problem with it. They might even feel a bit perturbed if you are trying to 'protect' them from things like that. We don't really want to be treated differently (maybe sooometimes...) and we just want to be accepted as one of the guys. We like to think we are tough and can hang with the rest of 'em. I could be wrong, though. It also depends on the girl herself. You can't really generalize a whole gender like that. Eh, tough question you brought up.
On March 09 2008 08:51 Lemonwalrus wrote: Quick question, as a representative of the female gaming community, do you find it particularly offensive when someone uses terms like 'rape' to describe the outcome of a game.
Idk, it just seems to me that it would be like beating a black player and saying 'man, you just got lynched.' -(I'm not racist, just an example.) I can't speak for every girl out there, but personally I never really even thought of it that way. It doesn't bother me at all. I raped a whole bunch of men last night.
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Obviously this blogs would bring a lot of ppl... Travis what else did you expect ? :p To the op : Why the hell do you care ? Just fkin ignore it. Problem solved. We already have like 3 or 4 frenchs girls that played starcraft actively and never bothered about being beaten or whatever else you think... The ones that feel shamefull are mostly fucking idiots. Simple as that.
She or he ? I don't care, if it can play decently i'd play 50 games a week if i want to. Remember "it" is a gamer beforehand.
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Snet
United States3573 Posts
god shutup no one cares and the only people who do are east pubs who try and trade illys for sexy pic maps
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Aw snet, and I thought we were friends. ;P </3
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Snet
United States3573 Posts
mousey.rr is my only friend
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Niji, there are idiots, douchebags, and assholes everywhere in the world. Especially on the internet. Just ignore it. Life is a lot easier if you don't let little things like this get to you.
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On March 09 2008 10:28 Snet wrote: god shutup no one cares and the only people who do are east pubs who try and trade illys for sexy pic maps lol, do you know what a blog is?
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Snet
United States3573 Posts
On March 09 2008 11:18 fight_or_flight wrote:Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 10:28 Snet wrote: god shutup no one cares and the only people who do are east pubs who try and trade illys for sexy pic maps lol, do you know what a blog is?
yes?
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On March 09 2008 11:09 Hypnosis wrote: werent you in FK? im cob Haha, cob. Yeah, it's me.
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The online community can be so messed up when it comes to engaging in conversation. People say such horrible things when they know they the worst consequence would be having the other person insult them back. Whether the flaming comes in the form of gender bashing, noob bashing, hacker accusations, or w/e, there's just too much of that going on. I always try to be as well-mannered as possible but its so hard to maintain that behavior when someone's cussing me out. Anyway, thanks for the writeup. I felt it helped to remind me I shouldn't sink down to such a childish level.
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I played counterstrike in a clan for a 3 years. We had a girl player on the team. After 3 years, we found out that it had been a guy all along. He had created a myspace, and had sent us pictures and never once slipped up (or if he did, we didnt pick up on it). Was quite disturbing really.
Unfortuantly, the majority of gamers are nerds who have had little connection with girls. So they end up trying to be funny with jokes like "go make me some pie", or figure this is their big chance to finally hook in or something. Resulting in making themselves look like fools.
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On March 09 2008 09:00 grobo wrote:Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 08:13 LeafHouse wrote: girls like jkillashark and mnm are treated very well wut?
whoops, I'm an idiot... sorry j. thanks dronebabo
edit: I thought jkillashark was saying he knew what it was like to be exactly in her situation. which he obviously didn't say when I re-read his post. sorry again.
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Hey April, remember when you were scared to join any teams. Because every team you joined would die in like 1-7 days.
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On March 09 2008 14:02 Krohm wrote: Hey April, remember when you were scared to join any teams. Because every team you joined would die in like 1-7 days. ROFL. Omg. It's only because Ken would get so pissed at me for always changing names. x3 I think shock kind of sucks but I joined anyways. @.@ Hope none of them read this, but it's true.
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yeah i believe female gamers exist..but i dont think they're any good at gaming
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On March 09 2008 02:06 Niji-z wrote:My response to those two types of people? I never retaliate. I " " and "lol". I will often start talking about the game (if we are obbing) or ask them questions about themselves, or ignore them and make unrelated comments as if they never said anything. I think that for me this is the easiest way to deal with it. I believe being bm back will just egg them on. I do not like having enemies. I refuse to be bm to anyone for any reason. The result is usually the same. If I continue to have contact with the person, they have usually added me to their friend list within a few days or hours. I like it this way. But sometimes I wonder if this is weird. Why would I want to have any kind of relationship with anyone who was so degrading to me at one point? I sometimes wonder if it is best to defend myself, rather than trying to charm my way into being treated like a human being. I become aware of these questions mostly when my boyfriend or younger brother witness the name calling. I will become aware of what is actually being said and how terrible it is. I realize that I am letting it happen and merely just smiling back at their remarks and even trying to be their friends. I don't usually realize that they are doing anything wrong because it is so common that I have just accepted it as normal. My boyfriend gets VERY angry when he sees how people treat me on bnet and also gets angry at me for not doing anything about it. He will ask me questions like, "Why are you still in this game?", "Why are you hanging around with these people?" Me, I think it's pretty awesome that you can do that. How great would it be if we could turn all our enemies into friends? Sure, Ego says, "Stand up for yourself! Hit them back!", and I'm not sure if I would be able to do the same as you, in your place, but if you're able to--more power to you.
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Ken's pretty lame now. When ever I mention SC he's like "You still play that kids game?" etc. He acts like he's all high and mighty now.
Anyways, you up for some games?
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I'm always (almost) up for games. Niji[shock] @ USWest. Msg me anytime.
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Valhalla18444 Posts
if this was in the general forum it would be closed instantly
there is absolutely no justification for calling attention to your gender in this manner
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If u want to see penis @webcam, pm me !
Ps, be quick this offer expires...
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iNcontroL
USA29055 Posts
I've never lost to a girl. I think they are disadvantaged since socially it is far more acceptable for a dude to lock himself away for 4-5 hours A DAY for YEARS and play game(s). Whereas a girl is expected to NEVER play 1 hour of a game. Even the girls who do go against this norm they typically never do it to the degree of a guy.
That being said: You are funny. You discuss something that we all know. The gaming world online is comprised of adolescent boys. The behavior every girl experiences irl is magnified online by the perceived barrier of the impersonal internet. Who gives a shit? If you are above it just ignore it because they are 99% of the time insecure young boys who are trying to either win affection through negative flirting or are trying to impress their clique. The ones who dont give a shit really do and are trying to be like RPF and win affection by being "nice-guys." This is again, similar to real life. Just play the game and make sure your boyfriend gets his feathers rustled when he reads the random rantings of a 12 year old on your bnet screen. Oh noes... what ever shall I like, do.
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I am a girl, I am 13, I play StarCraft. And because of Watching a lot of Korean Games, and being a fan of it, here I am working for MYM as a Scene Editor for Starcraft :3 A little long enough of work, I might get my own MYM shirt and start attending leagues [as press]. The problem, though, I haven't been playing well yet. *sigh* But gender doesn't really matter in gaming. It's all about fun, and skills, I guess. I've experienced events like getting interrogated after people find out I'm a girl. I've been on TL for almost a year now, and I've gotten used to joining discussions. Just don't let them 'get to you.' During my first times here on TL, I have experienced some difficulties into joining discussions on the games, well that was before, now it's just like mixing in with them.
On March 09 2008 08:51 Lemonwalrus wrote: Quick question, as a representative of the female gaming community, do you find it particularly offensive when someone uses terms like 'rape' to describe the outcome of a game. I'd like to answer that too. Well, I don't find it offensive at all, after I've known the real meaning, anyway.
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United States24354 Posts
On March 11 2008 08:59 {88}iNcontroL wrote: I've never lost to a girl. I think they are disadvantaged since socially it is far more acceptable for a dude to lock himself away for 4-5 hours A DAY for YEARS and play game(s). Whereas a girl is expected to NEVER play 1 hour of a game. Even the girls who do go against this norm they typically never do it to the degree of a guy.
That being said: You are funny. You discuss something that we all know. The gaming world online is comprised of adolescent boys. The behavior every girl experiences irl is magnified online by the perceived barrier of the impersonal internet. Who gives a shit? If you are above it just ignore it because they are 99% of the time insecure young boys who are trying to either win affection through negative flirting or are trying to impress their clique. The ones who dont give a shit really do and are trying to be like RPF and win affection by being "nice-guys." This is again, similar to real life. Just play the game and make sure your boyfriend gets his feathers rustled when he reads the random rantings of a 12 year old on your bnet screen. Oh noes... what ever shall I like, do. I've always thought the same thing, but I wonder why in places like South Korea we aren't seeing an evening of the playing field, in terms of gender, as it becomes more socially acceptable...
BTW nice touch at the end haha.
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iNcontroL
USA29055 Posts
On March 11 2008 09:01 sohee_pink wrote:I am a girl, I am 13, I play StarCraft. And because of Watching a lot of Korean Games, and being a fan of it, here I am working for MYM as a Scene Editor for Starcraft :3 A little long enough of work, I might get my own MYM shirt and start attending leagues [as press]. The problem, though, I haven't been playing well yet. *sigh* But gender doesn't really matter in gaming. It's all about fun, and skills, I guess. I've experienced events like getting interrogated after people find out I'm a girl. I've been on TL for almost a year now, and I've gotten used to joining discussions. Just don't let them 'get to you.' During my first times here on TL, I have experienced some difficulties into joining discussions on the games, well that was before, now it's just like mixing in with them. Show nested quote +On March 09 2008 08:51 Lemonwalrus wrote: Quick question, as a representative of the female gaming community, do you find it particularly offensive when someone uses terms like 'rape' to describe the outcome of a game. I'd like to answer that too. Well, I don't find it offensive at all, after I've known the real meaning, anyway.
How do you feel about australian mixed with asian accents? We could have a match-made in nerdy heaven here...
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Physician
United States4146 Posts
On March 11 2008 07:59 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: if this was in the general forum it would be closed instantly
there is absolutely no justification for calling attention to your gender in this manner unless the OP thread seeks attention with the "whose is gay" motif no? or the "faggot parade" etc.. those are ok, ain't that right fakesteve? lol.. after all it ain't strictly related to the gender issue : )-
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Valhalla18444 Posts
i don't even understand what you're saying
you are the craziest old man i have ever encountered and i really wish you would stop trying to teach me life lessons every time i swear in a post on these forums
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Baltimore, USA22225 Posts
On March 11 2008 07:59 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: if this was in the general forum it would be closed instantly
there is absolutely no justification for calling attention to your gender in this manner
Agreed 100%.
This thread is nothing more than an excuse to talk about yourself, and if it were anything but a blog, would've been closed a while ago.
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I didn't think there was anything wrong with this blog entry, though it seems I was terribly mistaken. As I mentioned beforehand, I had no other intention than to provide an interesting read for people, but it seems posting about yourself and your experiences in a TL blog are completely inappropriate. I'd be interested to know what kind of blog entries are valid, if this is not. I actually felt that this had more good content in it than the majority of other blog entries out there, and I don't go into anyone else's blog and tell them that it's useless and unjustified.
What exactly is the reason that this blog did not attract any of your negative comments while mine did? Is he not calling attention to his sexual preference? You wouldn't want to bash on a homosexual talking about his homosexuality, but you freely bash on a woman talking about her femininity. I wonder why this is?
And the "it would have been deleted if it were in any other forum" comments are not needed, and I think you knew that, but felt the need to say it anyways. Really, there was a reason I posted it in this very forum rather than in "General."
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Braavos36362 Posts
I agree with FakeSteve that it wasn't really necessary to go declare this in this way.
However, there's nothing wrong with posting this in your blog. It's what blogs are for.
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Valhalla18444 Posts
yeah its a blog
thats why i said "if this was in the general forum" yadda yadda
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United States7488 Posts
I actually like all the blogs where people talk about themselves, specifically their problems because it's nice to know I don't have the problems that they have to deal with. A blog is where things that that should be for the most part. Though in regards to this blog I think it would have been more interesting had you also given more on your idea of how you think girls would like to be treated/received because of their gender.
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On March 11 2008 11:42 semioldguy wrote: Though in regards to this blog I think it would have been more interesting had you also given more on your idea of how you think girls would like to be treated/received because of their gender. I hadn't really thought of that. I guess it's too late now, though. I've got 'fail' all over my forehead.
But really quickly, though I can't really speak for all girls, I think mostly we just want to be accepted and treated like anyone else as a fellow person who has a love for a game and community.
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Valhalla18444 Posts
if that were true then you wouldn't feel the need for threads like this
i don't draw attention to myself because of my gender and neither should you
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Well, I wasn't trying to. That was not my intention at all. I don't know why you can't accept that.
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iNcontroL
USA29055 Posts
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Physician
United States4146 Posts
On March 11 2008 11:58 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: if that were true then you wouldn't feel the need for threads like this i don't draw attention to myself because of my gender and neither should you http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/742/painting8ov.jpg - posted by you in the general forums, obvious pun intended
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Physician
United States4146 Posts
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I know alot of girls on battle.net.
InTrO)Prinstine InTrO)Mari GoLdDragOn[cTw]
are just a few examples. I cannot deny I treat them in another way, but thats just how it is in real life. I will never talk to a girl, not even to my best friend like I talk with my closest male friends. Thats just how it is.
When a player tells me "I'm female" I'll just go with it. I don't need a proof. I trust people and if they say "haha I'm male and you idiot fall for it" then I just laugh.. whats the deal.
Girls are not bad in playing because they are girls, they usually have better things to do then to train... still its nice to see a girls opinion on this topic.
Just let the idiots talk. gl hf
+ Show Spoiler +
1) You are not female, call me.. 2) Pix or it never happened :/
I'm just kidding :D
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On March 11 2008 08:59 {88}iNcontroL wrote: The ones who dont give a shit really do and are trying to be like RPF and win affection by being "nice-guys."
ahhaaha
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On March 11 2008 09:52 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: i don't even understand what you're saying
you are the craziest old man i have ever encountered and i really wish you would stop trying to teach me life lessons every time i swear in a post on these forums
ahjahahah, holy shit this thread is funny
you should write these artilces again FS. I'd start watching pro leagues =]
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On March 11 2008 10:32 EvilTeletubby wrote:Show nested quote +On March 11 2008 07:59 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: if this was in the general forum it would be closed instantly
there is absolutely no justification for calling attention to your gender in this manner Agreed 100%. This thread is nothing more than an excuse to talk about yourself, and if it were anything but a blog, would've been closed a while ago. If my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a schoolbus.
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I don't understand why you guys are making such a big deal out of this...
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Calgary25942 Posts
On being white in the Starcraft gaming community
There are many pros and cons to being a white gamer on bnet. I think it is safe to say that a white gamer will generally get treated a lot differently than asian gamers, in several different ways.
I must admit that I have tried in the past to keep my race unkown to avoid having to deal with some of those issues, but I found it deceptive and difficult to have a close relationship with people on my friend list, having to avoid discussing various aspects about myself and my life. There was definately a noticeable difference in how I was treated, though, when I was assumed to be an asian.
I must admit that more than not, I do enjoy being a white gamer, even welcoming some of the negative attention I get a lot. I have learned to ignore the things that bother me, and laugh at most of the various things people say.
The most common response I get is disbelief. There are a lot of people who think that whites who play Starcraft simply do not exist. I think that people are more likely to accept whites playing MMO's or even FPS games, but to think that a white would have any enjoyment playing an RTS game just seems to be beyond a lot of people. Congratulations, I have now just become an object of hate, disgust, and a target for ridicule and various name calling from people I have only just met upon stating my race. The insults ensue: cracker, dog, hamburger, etc. The fact that almost everyone on bnet has known at least one asian who has posed as a white either personally or through popular news floating around on websites such as TL does not help the situation. I can especially remember, right before I went on my internet hiatus, the 'Hot_Bid scandal'. The disbelief of my fellow gamers became even more frequent and harsh during that time, and I was often called a 'Hot_Bid wannabe', one of the few insults that really bothered me.
Afterwards, people want to see "proof". It does no benefit to either parties, this "trying to prove yourself", but it can be very bothersome when people continue to give you trouble and make you out to be dishonest. I oftentimes find myself wanting to just prove it and get it over with so we can move on to something else. Half the time the accuser rejects any kind of proof you attempt to provide. A picture can be taken from anywhere off the internet. I have even found myself responding to the "if you are really white, then call me and let me hear your voice." This happened on two occasions. The first person responded with "Oh sh*t, you really are white!" and the second with "Dude, I still don't believe you, that was your little friend." There really is no winning in the latter situation and I have learned that it is a futile waste of my time to try to prove myself. Yet I still find myself trying to do so, wishing people would believe me and accept me for who I am. I have often found myself wanting to respond with "prove to me you are asian". It makes me think of how unnecessary it is.
Another type of person is the kind who believes you are white, or pretends to just for humors sake. They oftentimes ramble with endless insults such as "cracker, honky, whitey" and remarks such as "f*ck you," "eat another hamburger," "die in twin towers," "watch another episode of Lost," or "hey whitey, wanna cyber?" Before there was any mention of my race, I would be treated like everyone else, but I immediately become a target of unmerited hatred.
My response to those two types of people? I never retaliate. I "" and "lol". I will often start talking about the game (if we are obbing) or ask them questions about themselves, or ignore them and make unrelated comments as if they never said anything. I think that for me this is the easiest way to deal with it. I believe being bm back will just egg them on. I do not like having enemies. I refuse to be bm to anyone for any reason. The result is usually the same. If I continue to have contact with the person, they have usually added me to their friend list within a few days or hours. I like it this way.
But sometimes I wonder if this is weird. Why would I want to have any kind of relationship with anyone who was so degrading to me at one point? I sometimes wonder if it is best to defend myself, rather than trying to charm my way into being treated like a human being. I become aware of these questions mostly when my friend or younger brother witness the name calling. I will become aware of what is actually being said and how terrible it is. I realize that I am letting it happen and merely just smiling back at their remarks and even trying to be their friends. I don't usually realize that they are doing anything wrong because it is so common that I have just accepted it as normal. My friend gets VERY angry when he sees how people treat me on bnet and also gets angry at me for not doing anything about it. He will ask me questions like, "Why are you still in this game?", "Why are you hanging around with these people?" I oftentimes feel like I really don't have a choice. I might as well not play the game, or ever go on bnet, because it happens everywhere I go.
The thing that bothers me the most, is when people say I only got something I wanted because I'm white. Comments like "You only got into that team because you're white" really make me angry. Of course I will adamently deny any such thing, but in my mind I begin to think, "What if he's right? What if they only let me in because I'm white?" I cannot stand the thought of that. That and people going easy or letting me win because I am white. It it the most insulting thing you could do or say to me.
It isn't all bad though, and for me the good points outweigh the bad, because I try not to let things bother me. If people aren't cussing me out for no reason, they are usually very friendly with me. I hate to admit that I enjoy the positive attention I oftentimes get. I stand out because I am different from everyone else. People notice me and remember me and want to get to know me. People seem more likely to want to give me tips when I ask or even train me, and I definately need all the help I can get. When I am in a team I am usually loved and am treated slightly special. People want to stick up for me. Of course, that is because I am usually the only white among all those asians. I also like to think that a lot of it is due to my personality, but it would be too much to hope that they only treated me that way because of my pleasant personality.
Probably the best thing about being white on bnet for me is the very fact that people do not expect me to know how to play the game. They do not usually expect me to be especially good, so when I lose I can at least have the consolation that I didn't go below anyones expectations of me. But even better is when I do win, and people realize that they have just been beaten at their own game by a white. It is very devastating to many people and I relish in the "I can't believe I just lost to a white." On the opposite end, I sometimes feel pressure to prove myself as being just as capable to play regardless of my race, and to "represent" white gamers. It can also be slightly annoying when the "omg I lost to a white" comments go on and on. Just last night, I went on vent for the first time with a team I am planning on joining. I was playing on of their members, and everyone was obbing, and there was lots of, "Dude, if you lose to a white I am going to laugh so hard." What's the big deal?
I admit that I am guilty to some of the things I have mentioned above when I meet someone on bnet who claims to be white. I can also be very skeptical, though I would never voice that opinion because I would be doing the exact same thing that people do to me. I also feel that if they really are white, they must not be very good, and that I should be able to beat them. When I lose to a white, I am very surprised and angry. I feel like I should not lose to whites, even though I am one. Perhaps that is a reason why I am so forgiving with people, because I can't help but be affected by those same stigmas and can relate to some of the feelings they have. I also tend to want to protect and help along other whites as long as they seem good mannered.
I am sorry for being so long winded, but thanks for bearing with me till the end. I hope you found it somewhat interesting. Feel free to ask me any questions or discuss the topic.
Are there any other whites out there who feel differently than I do? Or the same? And of course to guys who have had experience posing as a white. I know there are a lot of you. ;] Ever lost to a white? Ever met a white player on bnet? Discuss discuss anything related!
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Chill, you're mega-bored at work, aren't you? ;o
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Calgary25942 Posts
Surprisingly no! I actually have a lot to do today at work, and some TL stuff...
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On March 12 2008 01:08 Chill wrote: Surprisingly no! I actually have a lot to do today at work, and some TL stuff...
A white boy, on TL?
You're lying...PICS!!
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My experience in the internet has taught me one of two things towards girls playing games.
1) They are men.
2) They actually are girls, but are beastly, greasy, and just down right ugly. Would probably resemble a man more than anything, if the truth were to be told.
Well, I guess what I'm trying to say is....Bitch, go back to the kitchen and MAKE ME SOME FOOD.
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who the fuck cares, youre never gonna meet 99% of the people you play, why should your having a supposed vagina mean anything.
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Physician
United States4146 Posts
On March 11 2008 22:38 Hawk wrote:Show nested quote +On March 11 2008 09:52 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: i don't even understand what you're saying
you are the craziest old man i have ever encountered and i really wish you would stop trying to teach me life lessons every time i swear in a post on these forums ahjahahah, holy shit this thread is funny I can't deny he is right on three counts though, had to laugh too.
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I too am in fact a girl:O
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This thread is hilarious
I've always thought the same thing, but I wonder why in places like South Korea we aren't seeing an evening of the playing field, in terms of gender, as it becomes more socially acceptable...
BTW nice touch at the end haha.
In any competitive endeavour its generally men at the upper elechons... because the competitive drive is more with them. Male behavior tends more to extremes.
SEXUAL DIMORPHISM IN THE HUMAN SPECIESSSSSS
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I never ever in my life played a male in a mmorpg. To me it feels more natural to play a woman than a white guy.
Discuss...
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Calgary25942 Posts
On March 12 2008 05:03 Jayson X wrote: I never ever in my life played a male in a mmorpg. To me it feels more natural to play a woman than a white guy.
Discuss... You love cock.
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On March 12 2008 05:11 Chill wrote:Show nested quote +On March 12 2008 05:03 Jayson X wrote: I never ever in my life played a male in a mmorpg. To me it feels more natural to play a woman than a white guy.
Discuss... You love cock.
Should i try it?
Discuss...
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Valhalla18444 Posts
you are so unbelievably out of touch with reality. Got any more kerrigan porn you wanna share?
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.... no pics??
I am so disappointed. Worst thread ever.
AND CHILL... YOU'RE WHITE?!??! I can never treat you the same again. OMFG. Honkie.
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Us chicks got it tough right?
....
THATS RIGHT I"M A GIRL TL.NET!
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Ok, Hot_Bid go ahead and rename him her to Jonowoman92.
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I have a hard time understanding what senior-citizen physicians are doing spending all their time playing StarCraft. But it could be just me. Also, I've been wanting to say this for a long time, since I started lurking -- your posturing is really condescending and disrespectful. If you don't like someone's behavior, ignore it. You have your own starcraft website you can post on, you know?
It is totally uncharacteristic of me to flame someone, but this guy's posts just irk me. IRK me.
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Osaka27017 Posts
I might just give you his star for this post.
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I admit i haven't even read this girls OP, seemed like a waste of time.
Physician, you need a hobby.
Edit: That isn't teaching fakesteve morals.
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On March 11 2008 11:58 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: if that were true then you wouldn't feel the need for threads like this
i don't draw attention to myself because of my gender and neither should you Transvestite pride Steve!
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On March 13 2008 02:16 TheFoReveRwaR wrote:Show nested quote +On March 11 2008 11:58 FakeSteve[TPR] wrote: if that were true then you wouldn't feel the need for threads like this
i don't draw attention to myself because of my gender and neither should you Transvestite pride Steve! omg...FakeSteve
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Braavos36362 Posts
haha it all makes sense now why Steve is so hung up on gender
he's a girl in the starcraft community too!!!
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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 > All
I try to treat everyone (online) the same, regardless of sex. I know a few that try to keep their girl identity unknown to avoid e-pussy mongers, and some that are ambiguous in their declared gender. But thats not the reason though; its just easier to be one personality than to be a dick towards guys and change into a nicey-nice when addressing girls.
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yes, i have and she was a friend of my group of irl friends, but we did not know her irl
ppl kept suspecting her to be fake but i believed she was real, after a long time of geting to know each other and playing with each other , etc, something came up and one of the guys were like "i found out SHES FAKE" that was a lie
my other friend who found out while drunk, called her and said BICH WHY U LYING TO US etc etc and hes like "you sound like a guy! omg" she got pissed and quit sc. she was pretty good too
from then on, we stopped talking and playing together,... so sad...
niji.. are YOU that person by any chance?? just wondering cuz ur description sounds the same
and yes, ive lost to a girl more than once
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Emlary = girl... Although I've never gamed with her...
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there are a couple of girls i've played games with :3
they are the most insane with internet meme's
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United States22883 Posts
Retaliating is the worst way to handle it. You'll only stoke the flames and your blood pressure will probably go up if you let people offend you over the internet. :x
Most of the kiddies will give up pretty quickly if you ignore them. Some people may persist forever, and I commend people with that type of dedication.
Gamer "grrls" piss me off though. Unfortunately, the 99% of male idiots on the internet enable them, so both sides deserve blame. The ones I'm talking about are those who are terrible or even just relatively worse, yet are treated like top players. It happens all the time in WoW (shitty girl gets accepted into strong WoW guild based on breastesses) and also CS.
I do understand that pro CS teams deserve sponsorship money based on their advertising worth, but it's absolutely ridiculous to me that women have completely seperate tournaments and leagues from men. It may be the case that teams like g3 deserve sponsorship because they're a popular "brand", but they shouldn't get special tournaments to win when they're not a top team. It's anti-feminism, but they're too vapid to care.
You (grrl gamers, not the OP) shouldn't complain about the overly negative treatment of female gamers when you're exploiting the overly positive treatment as well. The two go together.
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it's like real life anyway where the guy pays for everything and the girl does whatever the fuck she wants with her money/time, and still demands more shit from men, i.e. "equality"
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wtf chill. Pics?
Wanna cyber?
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Greates Blog Ever. Damn, some of the comments are pure gold.
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On March 15 2008 16:16 PrinceOfControl wrote: you're definetly a dude
Yes, I am Dude pride!
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