[Girl] Parody. Part Two. Warning: Mature Content

154 Posts

December 05 2016 17:53 GMT

OK the 3 months thing was a lie and it's the next day. I'm on a train, doing an hour and a half commute from my home city to my home town. This has the repugnant foreboding of becoming a diary to it. I don't want to be one of those people, who write about wiping their arse, unless it was with toilet paper which also functions as a news paper, comic book or blog. Why hasn't anyone involved with public media or working in the anal hygiene industry ever thought about synergizing the two, is what I wonder while I occasionally glance out the window for whatever reason, from time to time while typing the letters. Well actually, this is a bit I came up with beforehand. I even thought about ranting about there not being anything going on out there worth looking at, and rehashing the neurotic glances, typical behavior of people who masturbate in public places where people have sex with hookers, the former referring to myself, yesterday. I just couldn't bring myself to solicit a miserable, fucking handjob for fuck's sake. Time for some introspection. It's high, introspection time I weed out the sabotaging forces in my psyche, which led to this fuckup, from the ones lobbying for not fucking up, the failure of which to prevail over the former led to this sad handfuck. Syke! Has there never in history been anyone to connect the two neurons required to put into practice news toilet paper? is what I actually preconceived ranting about, and I meticulously bogarted working it in all this time, in my mind, as I was writing and staring at the toilet sign at the stop where the train departed from, a minute ago. Those two neurons though. Let's do it sheeple! You've heard it here first. And you hookers, stop shitting up the places where you serve your clients. That wasn't dogshit I stepped in yesterday, no siree. But I guess it comes with the prep, if you don't want to, or don't have the money to take drugs to shortcut you into the confinement of that robotic state of mind's framework parameters, necessary to be sharp about baiting, coercing strangers into riding your intimate, most erogenous areas, on top of standing to bear it then and later; in which case you simply take a nr 2 in the immediate vicinity, to mark your territory and feel sovereignty over handling the situation on some instinctive level, instead. Sovereignty is such a lovely word. Don't do it, don't be like me and drag beautiful words through fecal matter just for emphasis of who knows what pseudo-psychological theory featuring a clash of common decency vs work ethic. Maybe it was dogshit afterall. I didn't take it to the lab or anything, although I could've. I will. But I won't get back for two weeks, damn. That turd will be dried up by then. I even thoroughly washed its remnants off my shoe.

dravernor

Netherlands6181 Posts

December 05 2016 18:34 GMT

This is the most drug induced writing I have ever read in my life.
You should consider writing lyrics for The Mars Volta.

ninazerg

United States7291 Posts

December 05 2016 18:58 GMT

On December 06 2016 02:53 N0 wrote:
nr 2

nr 15

154 Posts

December 05 2016 20:18 GMT

On December 06 2016 03:34 dravernor wrote:
This is the most drug induced writing I have ever read in my life.
You should consider writing lyrics for The Mars Volta.

Nicotine. Once or twice a day I toke homegrown tobacco, in handrolled cigarettes only. I rarely inhale. It's enough for me. Used to smoke legit, 2 packs a day 8 years ago, but now I'm hypersensitive to that stuff.

Upon intending to listen to a few songs I sidetracked to Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders - Music from the original DC Classic Original Movie.
Why Volta, are they hiring? I find the fact that they have a song called Viscera Eyes disturbing. It's also the username of a TL forumite (without the space) who happens to be the second most banned person on the mafia subforum (not counting the perms). The one with the most bans recently claimed to have exchanged accounts with me (he hid it with anchors though).

Race Bannon

689 Posts

December 26 2016 03:06 GMT

I've just made up a variation of chess I call Alien Hand Mafia Chess, whereby each player may gain the ability to replace a few of his competitor's moves, by undoing and then moving the same piece somewhere else.

Before the game starts, the players secretly pick a constellation of pieces with the equivalent value sum of 13 (each piece has an assigned value to it: pawn = 1, knight & bishop = 3, rook = 5, queen = 9), containing 2 pawns max. Then they write down this information, or inform a 3rd party.

Each of those pieces may be alien handed only once, and only if the oponent is overcome in a ranked match of forum mafia, prior.

Furthermore every player from the ranked match of forum mafia should be engaged in an alien hand mafia chess match with every other player, with the gamestate frozen at awaiting AH attempt outcome, as to not waste face-offs. Similarly, for haste's sake, every defeat in the face-off results in a free alien handing for the opponent, whenever he decides to make his counter AH move.

If a ®match's 3 constituent, back-to-back dayphases last 1 day each, and a new game starts every two weeks, then the continued, unwavering involvement of 13 players + hosts is required throughout an estimated timespan spectrum stretching at least 6 years, at most 60+ years to conclude all the ongoing chess games (78), the progress of which is best showcased in the flavor, featuring another player's perspective each time.

Holy Shit.

(12 +11 + 10 + 9 + 8 + 7 + 6 + 5 + 4 +3 + 2 + 1 = 78)

Coagulation

United States9633 Posts

December 26 2016 04:44 GMT

Im kind of sad TL didnt do a holiday banner this year.

ninazerg

United States7291 Posts

December 26 2016 21:55 GMT

Wtf happened to you. Stop doing drugs.

Please or register to reply.

[Girl] Parody. Part Two. Warning: Mature Content

Completed

Ongoing

Upcoming