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An Intro on Schizoid Personality Disorder - Page 2

Blogs > ApatheticSchizoid
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ApatheticSchizoid
Profile Blog Joined June 2014
Canada85 Posts
February 13 2016 16:28 GMT
#21
On February 14 2016 01:05 QuanticHawk wrote:
Thanks for answering.

maybe it's worth a revisit since these things clearly impact you on a daily basis? Just because one pill/dr sucked doesn't mean they all do. Doubly so for meds. One pill or dosage might not effect you at all but another might, etc.

best of luck!


That's just the thing. There isn't any medication out there that will combat the effects of schizoid personality disorder. My depression is hopefully gone, but there's no way to tell for sure. My social anxiety can be dealt with as long as social interactions stay short. My insomnia will never be as bad as was. I get around 6 hours of sleep a night and I'm sure for most of you that's not enough. When staying up for 2 or 3 days at a time becomes normal, you'll gladly take 6 hours a night. At it's worst, I was staying up for like a week straight at times. They were miserable weeks. Schizoid personality disorder is all that's left. Sure it impacts me on a daily basis, but when there's no known cure for it, you don't really care about being diagnosed. Hell they can't even decide on why it occurs at all.
pebble444
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Italy2503 Posts
February 15 2016 08:12 GMT
#22
The reason why i posted the Batman is of him finding his inner path. When Bruce Wayne looses his parents, he undergoes a traumatic event that marks his life path. From here, his character reminds me a lot of the things you are saying about youself. You like to be alone, to develop, to assest, to do your thing. You seek to find your inner path. Thats what Bruce does for 10+ years. He barely speaks to others, and so when he does, he has difficulty relating and having a conversation. Even when he goes to Asia, he prefers to operate alone. He barely speaks to others. He learns to listen, and he goes on a quest to ultimate his inner path. When he is all done, he comes back and re-enters society in a way that is accepatble and works for him. He develops the Character of Wayne, helping others and developing his Economic Empire. While being polite, social and "normal". Still, this is not enough, so he develops the persona of Justice-man, by whatever means necessary, and he re-enters society as the masked Justice-man. Still talking to others and enteracting. When he does so he still finds time for himself. By putting up masks and barriers, he enables himself to enteract and lead the kind of life that he wants, dedicating some hours to himself, some to society, some to his dream.

This is not unlike many people who live life. Time for yourself is always needed. Some take 1 hour a week, some 1 hour a day, some 3 hours a day. Dedicating to your job, and dedicating to your dream.
Of course, the oppurtunity he has may be different from many others, only due to the fact that he is surrounded by loving and caring people, and has billions of dollars at his disposal. He still had to endure the hardship of his own quest, finding his inner fear, and transforming his fear into Power.
"Awaken my Child, and embrace the Glory that is your Birthright"
ApatheticSchizoid
Profile Blog Joined June 2014
Canada85 Posts
February 15 2016 12:16 GMT
#23
On February 15 2016 17:12 pebble444 wrote:
The reason why i posted the Batman is of him finding his inner path. When Bruce Wayne looses his parents, he undergoes a traumatic event that marks his life path. From here, his character reminds me a lot of the things you are saying about youself. You like to be alone, to develop, to assest, to do your thing. You seek to find your inner path. Thats what Bruce does for 10+ years. He barely speaks to others, and so when he does, he has difficulty relating and having a conversation. Even when he goes to Asia, he prefers to operate alone. He barely speaks to others. He learns to listen, and he goes on a quest to ultimate his inner path. When he is all done, he comes back and re-enters society in a way that is accepatble and works for him. He develops the Character of Wayne, helping others and developing his Economic Empire. While being polite, social and "normal". Still, this is not enough, so he develops the persona of Justice-man, by whatever means necessary, and he re-enters society as the masked Justice-man. Still talking to others and enteracting. When he does so he still finds time for himself. By putting up masks and barriers, he enables himself to enteract and lead the kind of life that he wants, dedicating some hours to himself, some to society, some to his dream.

This is not unlike many people who live life. Time for yourself is always needed. Some take 1 hour a week, some 1 hour a day, some 3 hours a day. Dedicating to your job, and dedicating to your dream.
Of course, the oppurtunity he has may be different from many others, only due to the fact that he is surrounded by loving and caring people, and has billions of dollars at his disposal. He still had to endure the hardship of his own quest, finding his inner fear, and transforming his fear into Power.


I think I see quite a few differences now that you talked about what you meant by mentioning him. Now it seems like it's night and day between me and him. I have no interest of rejoining society. Not that I've ever really been apart of it. I've already developed my inner self. I know what I like and don't like to put it simply. When there's not even a handful of things you like, it's not hard. I know there's a lot more to your inner self then that, but describing it in detail would take too long. Self-awareness is a trait I have in spades.

He seems to have a lot of empathy. It sounds like he wants to help people. Schizoids lack empathy and I couldn't be happier about it. Sure it makes for a few awkward conversations here and there, but it just seems easier. Well I know that's not true. Schizoids do have emotions on a subconscious level. There's probably a few reasons why they don't surface for me at least. I've been repressing my emotions for years and I'm not sure how or what would happen if I just opened the flood gates. I'll paraphrase something someone said on another forum that will explain it better then I ever will.

"Schizoids are only schizoids because they're oversensitive individuals. This is essentially why the split occurs; to protect oneself from emotional damage."

He was referring to the split that happens between us and our social persona. When you're an overly sensitive person, you really can't handle emotions. I remember a few months ago when I felt jealousy for the first time. I was scared, angry and confused all at once. It took me weeks just to sort out what I felt and it why. To many people I'm sure they can do it naturally, I can't. Naturally it became second nature to repress every emotion to save myself any damage that might've been caused. We really can't handle our emotions at all and it can become a vicious cycle after awhile. We also lack the ability to process them as well. Regular people usually understand why they're irritated or mad, I really don't. A lot of work is required for me to think through emotions so I can find the root of them.

Back to the whole if I had a billion dollars things. He spends it to accomplish his dreams and to help people. I'd use that money to live a secluded life. I'd move to rural Japan since that's my dream. I'd pay people to bring me whatever supplies I'd need so I wouldn't have to deal with any thing like going to the grocery store. As long as it has really good internet and a stable internet connection, I'd be set. I'm sure I didn't explain things right, but it made since to me at least.
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