EPT[girl blog] Choices - Page 2
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Scarecrow
Korea (South)9172 Posts
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lichter
1001 YEARS KESPAJAIL22272 Posts
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Topin
Peru10108 Posts
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QuanticHawk
United States32130 Posts
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L1ghtning
Sweden353 Posts
On November 24 2014 08:32 Ovid wrote: Nothing super exciting just a problem, who do i ask out. Girl a or b. Not sure on the best way to explain it so excuse it being all over the place. Im 19 girl a is 18 and b is 17. A is 5ft 8 brunette b is 6ft blonde both are skinny but not extremely. I have known them both for almost 10 years. Both have similar personalities except girl b is quite shy and jumpy but becomes confident when she knows people or is with me. If i asked them out i would say 85% time yes with a and 99% with b. They both are equally attractive mostly since b has braces and gets the odd stress spot but would say in a year or two would be equal or better looking. Main problems are that they are sisters and b would probably be upset if i went out with a. So as i see it i have four options ask out a. Ask out b. Find someone else. Wait and see what changes. Excuse poor layout sent from old battered phone. You have known them for 10 years and don't know them well enough to know who you like more. That makes no sense unless you're judging them entirely based on physical characteristics. Don't do that. If you find it hard to distinguish between them, you should probably go for the one that seems the most interested. Remember that it's a two-way street. If you ask me, then I think you know who you like more, but you don't admit it because you don't want to give up on the other one out of fear that you would change your mind, or that it wouldn't work out. If you know who you like more, you know what to do. | ||
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Wormi
Germany181 Posts
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bITt.mAN
Switzerland3693 Posts
A is 5ft 8 brunette b is 6ft blonde both are skinny but not extremely. The details are unimportant, you've already answered the question 「do I feel sufficently attracted to them, physically」: They both are equally attractive But you have hesitations about the younger one, so you qualify with: They both are equally attractive mostly since b has braces and gets the odd stress spot but would say in a year or two would be equal or better looking. Which gets at the source of your issue. My personal preference is towards people with personality types like girl b is quite shy and jumpy but becomes confident when she knows people or is with me 'she becomes confident when she is with me' explains 99% with b = SHE LIKES YOU, you dummyBut, you hesitate because b would probably be upset if i went out with a which is a little concerning, because this would indicate 「b」 isn't emotionally mature enough to handle shit. Shit like 「the guy I like is dating my older sister instead of me」. Be warned: girls are like mythical dragons, with a ferocity and power over the emotions which is un-matched. Teenage girls are the same, except they haven't learned to tame and channel their fury, so the bitchyness is real. So be careful, I'd say the biggest argument against asking 「b」 out is that she isn't mature enough to keep it healthy. If 「being with Ovid」 is her source of (social) confidence, she risks building her identity on 'being with Ovid', becoming overly clingy, and not confident and built up enough as her own person. Do you know anything about their previous relationships, any drama/issues they might have a tendency to repeat with you? I'd say 〈don't stick it in crazy〉, and by 「crazy」, I mean 『teenagers』. This gets onto the real issue: your own maturity. So I'm treating this like its entirely real and factual (I have no way of knowing it really is, or not, but I'm trying to be helpful). Having two sisters liking you is a real fantasy for most young guys ... threesomes har har har. But really? What are you in it for? If you've known them both for almost 10 years, I'd say it'd be a pretty poor decision to risk burning your ties with them, simply because you tried to stick it in both. Take some perspective: are they people you want to remain friends with them once you're in Uni, and you come back home for break and have no one to hang out with? If you've known them for so long, and you're clearly good friends, be aware that you may be risking future friendship, depending on how hard you push, and how far you go. I said it's a maturity thing, and the real question is your maturity. 〈Oh noes she has braces and the occasional pimple, and is a bit young〉 is valid reason to dismiss someone only if you're assessing them on the basis of 'how good of a plaything are they, do they sufficiently augment my exterior social status' (better-looking girlfriend makes me look better). Really think about: "what is important to me about the question 〈how pretty/attractive she is〉 what about it matters". Because I'd encourage you to go for the person you feel more comfortable, relaxed, understood, and joyful with (this applies to all future relationships). NOT the person who'd increase your status cuz she'd perceived as hotter. NOT the person who you're only interested in for sex but not the good bits of a healthy and mutually supportive relationship. I've passed up so many opportunities because I've rejected girls based on how ugly I've judged them to be, to later really regret it when I realize how lovely they really are. And most of the time, they look just as good as everyone else when they bother to dress up and wear more makeup. The fact that that don't usually bother, speaks volumes about their confidence and character, which makes them more alluring, than girls who are predictably slutty. So I'd say 'go for' the younger one. The concern would be 'not mature enough', you judge that. Avoiding because 'not AS attractive' is invalid, because that model generally only accounts for physical attractiveness, which shouldn't be the only parameter. How to actually go about it? Don't think options ask out a. Ask out b. If it potentially turns out badly, it'd be all akward to have formally asked them, so you might rather just spend more and more time with them, and see who natrually gravitates towards you and reciprocates. Now, it can be hurtful to send confusing and mixed messages, so it's up to your discretion. Direct, formal approach, or escalating levels of intamacy until you make a move. You're probably already close enough to them that they trust you enough, for the latter to happen. Let's put it this way - if 「b」 turns out really immature, and it becomes unhealthy, if you want a shot with her sister, the circumstances in which you started it off with 「b」 would be important. 〈I asked her out on a date, without asking 「a」〉 versus 〈well we just ended up making out, and it kinda went from there〉. The first one somewhat implies that you're closed off to 「a」. Then again, I wouldn't recommend screwing either of them, ESPECIALLY if you'd want to have chances with the other one (hah imagine how would that make their father see you). YAY GIRL BLOGS, now with added Uni experience!!! | ||
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TheCzarOfAll
United States170 Posts
I vote that it doesn't matter which one you choose because you're all under 20 and the odds of you forging a lifelong relationship are pretty infinitesimal. That being said, I prefer shy girls.I'd choose b if I were in your shoes, but that's all up to your personal preference. | ||
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claybones
United States244 Posts
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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Fildun
Netherlands4123 Posts
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Capped
United Kingdom7236 Posts
Also plz follow claybones advice and write another blog AFTER you talk to their dad about wanting to fuck both of them but you cant make a decision. Im 99% sure you're friendzoned either way anyway. You've most likely misread their trust in you as a close friend (which is why they are comfortable physical contact and general closeness) as them wanting the D. Alot of guys do that. | ||
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ninazerg
United States7291 Posts
On November 25 2014 09:24 Capped wrote: A sounds hot. B sounds immature and fugly. Also plz follow claybones advice and write another blog AFTER you talk to their dad about wanting to fuck both of them but you cant make a decision. Im 99% sure you're friendzoned either way anyway. You've most likely misread their trust in you as a close friend (which is why they are comfortable physical contact and general closeness) as them wanting the D. Alot of guys do that. Sometimes, the friendzone can very quickly become the fuckzone....................................... ................ ................................................... ... | ||
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lichter
1001 YEARS KESPAJAIL22272 Posts
On November 25 2014 09:49 ninazerg wrote: Sometimes, the friendzone can very quickly become the fuckzone....................................... ................ ................................................... ... is that a hint or something | ||
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_fool
Netherlands682 Posts
Best move: don't pursue a or b for now. Instead, look for some c's and d's. Keep in contact with a and b since they seem fun. Then, in 2 years, write a new blog about whom to pick. I will probably tell you to pick b then  | ||
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ahswtini
Northern Ireland22212 Posts
but a hint to who???? | ||
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Skynx
Turkey7150 Posts
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