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Active: 11836 users

The War on Drugs: Over

Blogs > ninazerg
Post a Reply
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
February 17 2013 10:39 GMT
#1
Below is a picture of hemp, the plant commonly known as "The Buddha Buddha".

[image loading]


For many years, people have been saying that drugs are bad for you. Well, I am here to say that those people were wrong right. For years, commercials with talking dogs have been telling suburban white girls that smoking pot ruins lives. I followed this line of thinking until I took a logic test recently, where I learned that even if all flubs are trubs, then it doesn't necessarily mean any grubs are flubs, although some grubs are trubs. Why is this important?

Because winged giraffes aren't real.

Also, look at this:

- Some people do drugs
- Some people have shitty lives

Select the following that most applies as a conclusion:

a) All people do drugs.
b) Cats are satan.
c) All people who have shitty lives do drugs.
d) All people who do drugs have shitty lives.
e) All of the above.
f) None of the above.

That's when it struck me like a lightning bolt being thrown by the muscular arm of Zeus. I think Zeus works out, because he's like ripped. But I digress. No study has ever been done that directly links drugs to life-shittiness. Now, I've seen documentaries about people who do meth. Those people look like a rhino just walked up and took a dump on their life. That seems really bad. But then I think: wait a damn minute, there are people who live extremely shitty lives who aren't doing meth. When I realized this, I was like "Shit."

I realized this when I was like, 10.

HOWEVER! I spent quite a bit of time on the internet. I speak in all the slang irl and know all the memes. Now, a majority of internet users support marijuana legalization. It seems like most of the people who are against marijuana are people who grew up in the 60s. Such as MY MOM. Told her I thought weed should be legal, and she flipped the dining table over. Shit was crazy. But back then, everyone was doing drugs. It was all love and peace, driving around in vans and solving mysteries. Apparently, things got all crazy, and with a combination of some freaky sexual misunderstandings that occurred under the influence and some bad trips, the people who grew into adults from those times hardened themselves into insane anti-drug advocates (almost spelled it 'advokate') who consider drugs to be bad, but take prescription drugs (IRONYYYY). Now, naturally, because our parents are stupid, and we are smart, we know better. Drugs actually save lives and make race horses run really, really fast.

Or do they. The other day, I was feeling super trolly, and googled "Deaths caused by marijuana", and of course, I got a bunch of pro-legalization sources saying "0". Then I found this:

[image loading]
I'm gonna be honest, the first time I read this chart, I was like "Who was that one guy who died from weed?

Wait, what? Am I reading this chart wrong? If you've ever spoken to the avid weed-smoker, there are many types of marijuana. How do I know if the Purple Nurple (I think that's a kind of weed) is safer than Nuclear Oasis? And who are these 279 people who died from weed? I recently read an article that said in order to die from THC overdose, you need to smoke 30,000 blunts all at once. Now first of all, that many blunts wouldn't fit an average person's mouth, but THEY'D FIT IN YOUR MOM'S MOUTH CUZ SHE'S USED TO FITTING A LOT IN THERE... I mean... uh, sorry about that. Natural reflex. But 30,000 doobies would either burn down your house, or produce so much smoke that you would die from smoke inhalation.

So what they're saying here is: If you smoke 30,000 joints at one time, you will die. So WEED IS LETHAL. I KNEW IT. Now, let me put the nail in the coffin and prove once and for all that weed is bad:



The first day of legal marijuana use in Washington State was marred by an attempted robbery ending with two deaths at an alleged pot-growing facility just south of Seattle.

The possession of pot became legal in the state Thursday after voters passed a measure decriminalizing it in November. Day two kicked off with more celebrations under the Space Needle tower, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer reported, but the Pierce County Sheriff’s Department investigated an attempted robbery in Puyallup at an alleged growing center foiled by a homeowner who shot two alleged burglars in front of his 9-year-old son.

Officers say they arrived at the home of the man, 35, Thursday to find two masked men dead on the floor and marijuana plants in the attic, ABC affiliate KOMO-TV News reported.

While the law passed in November made it legal to carry and consume marijuana, Sgt. Sean Whitcomb of the Seattle Police Department said cultivating and selling the drug outside of medical dispensaries is still a crime.

“When you’re engaged in that type of criminal activity, there is an element of risk,” Whitcomb told ABC News Friday.

The legislation leaves Washington in a “murky place,” Whitcomb said. Smokers who have purchased marijuana from a street dealer are in the clear.

But the dealer “is still committing a felony,” he said.

The U.S. Attorney’s office in Seattle sent out a statement Wednesday reminding residents that pot is still illegal under federal law and cannot be brought onto federal property.

“Regardless of any changes in state law, including the change that will go into effect on December 6th in Washington State, growing, selling or possessing any amount of marijuana remains illegal under federal law,” the memo from U.S. Attorney Jenny Durkan said.

Federal officials have not said whether they will take action in Colorado and Washington where possession laws now conflict with nationwide drug classifications, but Seattle Police told ABC News Thursday that federal agents were hands-off on pot smokers in the state.

In an ABC News poll released shortly after the election, 48 percent of Americans expressed support for legalizing marijuana.



SOURCE: http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2012/12/day-1-of-legal-pot-marred-by-deaths-at-alleged-wash-growing-center/

So, there you have it. During the first day of legalized marijuana, an unrelated crime took place, and therefore, drugs kill.


















The real reason I posted this blog.

I told this amazing joke earlier, and wanted to share it with Teamliquid.net, but I felt like a one-sentence blog would be frowned upon, so all that other text is just filler. Here you go, enjoy:


If marijuana is a gateway drug...

[image loading]




IS THERE A WARPGATE DRUG?

[image loading]


*takes a bow, accepts roses*



***
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
synapse
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
China13814 Posts
February 17 2013 11:13 GMT
#2
I think marijuana should be legalized solely because precedents in other countries have shown that recreational usage decreases dramatically. Weed smells SO bad.
:)
OmniEulogy
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Canada6591 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-02-17 12:12:36
February 17 2013 12:11 GMT
#3
in an unrelated note
+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]

checkmate. Too bad it's missing its head but it wouldn't be documented evidence with ALL body parts accounted for.
LiquidDota Staff
TehRei
Profile Joined April 2012
Sweden261 Posts
February 17 2013 12:27 GMT
#4
*slow-claps in front of computer with mouth shaped like an O*

Most of your posts are entertaining as fuck, and this one didn't disappoint ^^ 5/5
Black[CAT]
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Malaysia2589 Posts
February 17 2013 12:52 GMT
#5
I still wonder how do you look like.
You mean ESPORTS isnt a synonym for SC2? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ -Proud owner of a Filco Majestouch 2 with Cherry Blue Switches- BW or SC2? Why not both?
Jibba
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States22883 Posts
February 17 2013 15:07 GMT
#6
I get that you're trying for the makesnofuckingsense vibe, but this makes no fucking sense.

The number in the chart is 1. The number in the article is 2.
ModeratorNow I'm distant, dark in this anthrobeat
GeckoVOD
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
Germany814 Posts
February 17 2013 15:46 GMT
#7
On February 18 2013 00:07 Jibba wrote:
I get that you're trying for the makesnofuckingsense vibe, but this makes no fucking sense.

The number in the chart is 1. The number in the article is 2.


Well, you can't write better when you're on LSD. Also great video lol. :D
@DonGeckone on Twitterstuff // JOIN THE YODA FANCLUB OR YOU'RE REALLY REALLY UNCOOL: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=398220
Dknight
Profile Blog Joined April 2005
United States5223 Posts
February 17 2013 16:12 GMT
#8
On February 18 2013 00:07 Jibba wrote:
I get that you're trying for the makesnofuckingsense vibe, but this makes no fucking sense.

The number in the chart is 1. The number in the article is 2.


The two numbers aren't related. The chart stops at 2005; the article is from this year.
WGT<3. Former CL/NW head admin.
radscorpion9
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Canada2252 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-02-17 17:17:04
February 17 2013 17:14 GMT
#9
Edit: Hmm I'm not sure if you're joking or not, but just in case you're not: If you believe that marijuana directly caused someone's death then that's not correct, because they didn't write anything in the "primary suspect" column. All they're saying is that it contributed to death (written underneath secondary suspect column)...i.e. they probably died in an accident because they weren't aware of their surroundings while smoking.
Dubzex
Profile Joined October 2010
United States6994 Posts
February 17 2013 20:16 GMT
#10
Is this a satirical piece on the argument to legalize marijuana because you did a really good job if that is the case.
"DONT UNDERESTIMATE MY CARRY OR YOU WILL BE CARRIED INTO THE ABYSS OF SUFFERING" - Tyler 'TC' Cook
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
February 17 2013 20:57 GMT
#11
On February 17 2013 21:11 OmniEulogy wrote:
in an unrelated note
+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]

checkmate. Too bad it's missing its head but it wouldn't be documented evidence with ALL body parts accounted for.


ಥ﹏ಥ

IT'S BEAUTIFUL
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
February 17 2013 21:15 GMT
#12
On February 18 2013 00:07 Jibba wrote:
I get that you're trying for the makesnofuckingsense vibe,


Damn, I tried so hard. People sometimes tell me that I try too hard and...


but this makes no fucking sense.


Oh... uh. Well, thanks.


The number in the chart is 1. The number in the article is 2.


Alas, I am undone. Thou hast slain meself wit thy utmost of wit.
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
dRaW
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
Canada5744 Posts
February 18 2013 13:12 GMT
#13
weed was banned near prohibition, weed or alcohol? which remains, they chose alcohol.

Seriously though if there was a real war on drugs, marijuana users would win because they are so high that nothing can hurt them.
I don't need luck, luck is for noobs, good luck to you though
MasterOfPuppets
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Romania6942 Posts
February 18 2013 16:52 GMT
#14
On February 18 2013 06:15 ninazerg wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 18 2013 00:07 Jibba wrote:
I get that you're trying for the makesnofuckingsense vibe,


Damn, I tried so hard. People sometimes tell me that I try too hard and...


Definitely getting the tryhard vibe as well...
"my shaft scares me too" - strenx 2014
sam!zdat
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States5559 Posts
February 18 2013 18:01 GMT
#15
On February 17 2013 20:13 synapse wrote:
Weed smells SO bad.


If you're annoyed by the smell of weed, just start smoking it, and then it will smell good
shikata ga nai
allourep
Profile Joined May 2012
United States67 Posts
March 03 2013 00:53 GMT
#16
The fucked up thing about the cannabis death statistic number listed stating (contributing to death) is that THC stays in your system WAAAAAY longer than the lasting effects. Lasting effect being about 3 hours average for somebody who has really sat down and puffed hard and who also hasnt had their tolerance built up too much. Anyways, the length of time the THC stays in the system of this same user, will last months. Say this person gets into some nasty wreck and dies like 2 days after smoking cannabis, clearly long after the effects have worn away, the autopsy will still say that marijuana was in the system and BOOM there you have it: another death with Cannabis contributing. Pretty cool huh? So that number is in fact waaaaaaay lower in reality. Also, this applies to anybody that is smoking cannabis at a job that might require the use of workers compensation. Say youre a cannabis smoker operating a fork lift but you smoked the night before and are sober as a bird. If you have an accident with the fork lift that puts you out of work for a while and they test your system, it automatically means you were stoned during the incident because THC was in your system.

Cannabis is the most medicinal plant on the face of the earth. One of the most interesting things about Cannabis is that your body has receptors specifically designed to inhibit cannabinoids (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endocannabinoid_system) Look at that link.

I have worked at a co-op and one of the most rewarding things was seeing HOW MANY patients who came in, who had these dire problems with deadly prescription drugs, kicking that horse shit to the curb. Of course there are the typical stoners that come in but it was honestly rewarding to see so many of the Mom and Pops who at one point slandered the plant, now being SOOOOO thankful that they can get a decent nights sleep without putting such fucking garbage of prescription drugs into their bodies. This plus the stories of patients beating cancer.

Of course anybody can be irresponsible with Cannabis... The most important thing is not letting it consume your life as far as disassembling your motivation or becoming so obsessed with it that you feel like you cant go a day without using it, but cannabis is not physically addictive. Its just such an amazing thing that its very easy to get tied up into it and before you know it, your life revolves around it. Although, as long as one is aware of ones self, you can smoke your ass off everyday and have a more than productive life. Its just easy to get caught up in the "get stoned and play video games all night every night" thing.

I would be very very skeptical as far as legalizing it. I am not saying I am against it but what I am saying is that if something sounds too good to be true... than it is. In California we recently rejected the legalization law that was to be passed and incase you didnt know, it was the smokers and cultivators that rejected it, not the stick up the ass middle aged white yup you would imagine. The reason it was rejected was because we took the time to carefully read the law and saw how that the law had many blank spaces and lose ends. Left to be manipulated post-legalization. Somebody tried to pull a quick one with that law which would have actually in detail, made it less legal than it currently is. Another story to read on.









Oh yeah.... LSD, Psylocybin mushrooms and DMT are all pretty neat too.
MysteryMeat1
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States3291 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-03-03 03:16:45
March 03 2013 03:14 GMT
#17
Ninazerg... you never fail to dissapoint!

However, your blog does bring up one question. If there are gateway drugs, and warpgate drugs, are there stargate drugs?

and i think warpgate drugs would be something like ferment weed to make beer.

Dam I wonder if you could do that
0.o
---'

I live in washington btw and i find it funny about the whole federal property you cant have it but state property you can.
"Cause ya know, Style before victory." -The greatest mafia player alive
rusedeguerre
Profile Blog Joined February 2013
121 Posts
March 03 2013 03:46 GMT
#18
I am amazed by the genius of this blog. 32/5.
Some would say that hydrogen cyanide is a delicious and necessary part of the human diet, but others claim it is a toxic and dangerous substance. The truth must therefore be somewhere in between.
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