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I used to study at another university. I studied there for two years. During those years I got a great grade average, I didn't hear of anyone studying the same who had a better average than me. This was a big accomplishment for me because I have always been lazy and I never cared about school and my parents were getting worried. "He says that he can perform but we've never seen him perform, what will become of him?". I don't not care about my grades (my friends don't really give a shit about them so why would I?) but my parents enjoyed it and that was the reason I did it. They've made a ton of sacrifices for me and my consistent underperformance so I was happy that I could make them happy by performing. I didn't tell other people about my grades, only my parents, I never told my siblings or my friends, why would I? A bachelor degree is three years though, not two. I decided that I'd do the last year at another university before proceeding to my master degree. I still don't know exactly why I made that decision or if it was a bad decision.
Now it's almost three years later. I have completed 1/8th of what I had left to complete to get a bachelor degree. The first two years took me two years and now the last single year will take me maybe three and a half years, if I'm lucky. Honestly I don't know how long it will take me or how long I have spent so far, I stopped counting at some point but I know it's bad.
I don't know what happened. It's easy to blame the new university but in the end it doesn't really matter who's to blame. It matters who has to take responsiblity and that's me. I could have avoided this. A bunch of other people avoid all this every year and get their god damn bachelor degree, but somehow I don't. Maybe I can't, maybe I can just walk straight into this again and again until I've lost count. The worst part is asking for help. The bureaucratic attitude of the bureaucracy, people following rules instead of helping you can really make you feel small at times. Someone once told me "These rules exist for a reason", then what about me?
I have a really hard time caring anymore. No matter what I do now, this is not performing. My parents are back at "Knew it, that kid is good for nothing". I blew it. I wonder what's next.
Oh well, fuck it.
 
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Tag dig sammen.
Seriously though, pick it up, it's not worth it to throw away years' work towards an education just to languish, you can slack in some dead-end job after you're done with it. At least you'll have a grade to show for it.
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What happened?
I know where you come from, from a young age my parent's had a high expectation of me(I blame those fucking doctors who identified me with a learning disability and said I my intelligence was in the 95th percentile), and when I didn't take to academia even in elementary school they have been dissapointed ever since. I scraped my way through high school(just didn't see the relevance of learning a bunch of bullshit I didn't care about, i learn more about geography from the discovery channel and then news then I did in school.), failed my first year of uni because my parents forced me to "make up my mind or go get a job", after I had spent my gap year as a grocer(definately did not want that life). Finally switched into a music course that I felt passionate about, and I may not have had great grades(i was always the "meet the expectations on the last night, don't go to lecture if it won't help me learn and never suck the teachers ass) but I learned my craft well and it's done ok for me.
Just finish your degree, put your head down, your obviously not too stupid or anything. There's nothing in the way but you!
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Dude, I am 28 years old with a job and married but you know what? I dont have a degree from high school, I went to university in UK to drop it after 1/2 years and came back home to help my father. I was an IB student with a 21 score out of 24 needed to get the diploma. Right now I have already did a re-exam of Economics in HL, raised my points from 2 to 4 and now I am studying Maths to be able to make my Math Studies a 3 from a 2 and get my diploma. What I am trying to say is, I wish I was a better student at that age rather trying to accomplish all this in my age. I have a full working job-obligations-bills and I am also studying just to satisfy and believe in myself more. So, yeah, dont give up.
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EPT
