• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 09:31
CEST 15:31
KST 22:31
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Serral wins HomeStory Cup 2914Serral wins Maestros of the Game 243ByuL, and the Limitations of Standard Play3Team Liquid Map Contest #22: Results and Winners7Code S Season 2 (2026): RO4 and Finals Preview12
Community News
Balance hotfix patch 5.0.16b (July 16)56Reynor: GSL Loss Wasn't About Preparation Format16[IPSL] Spring 2026 Grand Finals - This Weekend!8Weekly Cups (July 6 - 12): Protoss strike back12BSL Season 22 Full Overview & Conclusion8
StarCraft 2
General
Clem: "I don't have that much hope in Blizzard" Balance hotfix patch 5.0.16b (July 16) [D] Wireframe Casting Removed Reynor: GSL Loss Wasn't About Preparation Format Is the larve respawn broken?
Tourneys
Master Swan Open (Global Bronze-Master 2) WardiTV Summer Cup 2026 GSL CK #5 Race War RSL Revival: Season 6 - Qualifiers and Main Event HomeStory Cup 29
Strategy
[G] Having the right mentality to improve
Custom Maps
New Map Maker - Looking for Advice - Love or Hate Work In Progress Melee Maps [D]RTS in all its shapes and glory <3
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 534 Burning Evacuation Mutation # 533 Die Together Mutation # 532 Nuclear Family
Brood War
General
ASL22 General Discussion BW General Discussion NaDa’s Body Followup Pros Debate: Zerg Unfairly Nerfed? (ASL S22 map) Etiquete rules in Asl?
Tourneys
[IPSL] Spring 2026 Grand Finals - This Weekend! [Megathread] Daily Proleagues Escore Tournament - Season 3 Small VOD Thread 2.0
Strategy
Fighting Spirit mining rates Simple Questions, Simple Answers Creating a full chart of Zerg builds Relatively freeroll strategies
Other Games
General Games
Nintendo Switch Thread Path of Exile Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread General RTS Discussion Thread Beyond All Reason
Dota 2
Looking for a Dota Mentor Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Power Rank NeO.D_StephenKing vs This Guy From 1 Million Dance TL Mafia Community Thread Vanilla Mini Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread The Games Industry And ATVI UK Politics Mega-thread YouTube Thread
Fan Clubs
The IdrA Fan Club The HerO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! Anime Discussion Thread [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books Series you have seen recently...
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread MLB/Baseball 2023 McBoner: A hockey love story Tennis[sport] Formula 1 Discussion
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Simple Questions Simple Answers FPS when play League Of Legend on laptop How to clean a TTe Thermaltake keyboard?
TL Community
Northern Ireland Global Starcraft The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Role of Gaming on Mental Hea…
TrAiDoS
ASL S22 English Commentary…
namkraft
Poker (part 2)
Nebuchad
An Exploration of th…
waywardstrategy
ramps on octagon
StaticNine
Funny Nicknames
LUCKY_NOOB
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 9728 users

I Forgot How To Live

Blogs > EffervescentAureola
Post a Reply
EffervescentAureola
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States410 Posts
October 04 2012 00:49 GMT
#1
I forgot how to be someone I want,
and so I became someone I never wanted to be.

My mind was never clear,
always clouded by a thousand different elements,
a thousand different distractions.

I lost sight of the light
at the end of the tunnel,
and I lost sight of my soul.

I once had a dream,
but I decided to somehow turn it into a nightmare,
my life could have been easy and simple,
but not simple to the point that I would die of boredom,
but smooth enough that I could challenge myself everyday.

I could have lived life with a clear vision,
I could have lived out my dream,
Smiling, laughing, being the best person
with the strongest moral character,
that I could possibly have.

But instead I decided to pretend I hated life,
pretend that I wanted my life to end.

I chose to drag out my days,
with a big frown on my face and sunken eyes,
instead of truly enjoying my life.

I forgot how to love,
Because I only taught myself how to cheat.

I forgot how to live,
I forgot how to live my life from the inside,
Instead of being an observer
and watching myself from the outside.

**
evaunit01
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States512 Posts
October 04 2012 01:28 GMT
#2
Well written, hits home a bit...
Gamertag: William T. Riker - My life for Aiur!
TerranosaurusWrecks
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Canada187 Posts
October 04 2012 01:46 GMT
#3
"Because I only taught myself how to cheat"

that's a really good line
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ "Like you can train a n00b, but they will just be a trained n00b."
TheEmulator
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
28100 Posts
October 04 2012 01:50 GMT
#4
This is good

Reminds me of my life in a few ways.
Administrator
EffervescentAureola
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States410 Posts
October 04 2012 03:11 GMT
#5
Thanks everyone, this wasn't meant to be a great poem or anything like that, I just had to get some personal stuff off my shoulders. I don't want to be a robot, I'm tired of living this lie, I'm tired of trying, I've faced failure before, but after failing I have just lost my nerve and enthusiasm and threw my willpower out the window. I've let my failures dictate who I became as a person rather than taking command of my own life and not giving a #%^€, I've let people steal my dignity and I got depressed instead of fighting back. My problem is I was too sensitive. If I had just put up a barrier and did what I thought was right I could have gotten through this.
Jesse3
Profile Joined March 2020
1 Post
March 19 2020 01:13 GMT
#6
Hello how are you my name is Jesse. And this is exactly how i feel i wanted to see what did you start to do to overcome these over bearable feelings and thoughts im going insane feeling this way
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
OSC
13:00
JEC Open #2
Liquipedia
Sparkling Tuna Cup
10:00
Weekly #138
ByuN vs CureLIVE!
CranKy Ducklings560
CranKy Ducklings SOOP11
LiquipediaDiscussion
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
Ryung 964
StarCraft: Brood War
Shuttle 2316
Britney 1305
EffOrt 887
Soulkey 669
Mini 525
Hyuk 513
Soma 459
firebathero 373
Killer 240
Stork 235
[ Show more ]
ZerO 233
Hyun 204
Last 143
Dewaltoss 130
Sharp 129
ggaemo 125
PianO 70
Pusan 63
Hm[arnc] 54
910 42
ToSsGirL 39
Sexy 36
Aegong 34
yabsab 33
scan(afreeca) 30
sorry 30
Noble 20
Sacsri 19
zelot 18
Rock 16
IntoTheRainbow 10
Icarus 6
Rain 0
Dota 2
Gorgc6960
XcaliburYe214
League of Legends
Doublelift2510
KnowMe21
Counter-Strike
kRYSTAL_55
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor199
Other Games
singsing2400
B2W.Neo759
DeMusliM322
crisheroes304
Happy240
XaKoH 190
Hui .139
amsayoshi49
QueenE41
ZerO(Twitch)17
MindelVK7
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick2314
StarCraft 2
WardiTV424
StarCraft: Brood War
lovetv 14
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
[ Show 11 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Jankos3104
Upcoming Events
IPSL
2h 29m
Bonyth vs Ret
WardiTV Weekly
21h 29m
Monday Night Weeklies
1d 2h
OSC
1d 10h
PiGosaur Cup
2 days
The PondCast
2 days
Kung Fu Cup
2 days
CrankTV Team League
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
CrankTV Team League
4 days
[ Show More ]
Korean StarCraft League
5 days
RSL Revival
5 days
Online Event
6 days
Replay Cast
6 days
RSL Revival
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

YSL S3
HSC XXIX
Eternal Conflict S2 E2

Ongoing

IPSL Spring 2026
Acropolis #4
CSL 2026 Summer (S21)
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 3
RSL Revival: Season 6
CranK Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League
SCTL 2026 Spring
Eternal Conflict S2 E3
Stake Ranked Episode 3
XSE Pro League 2026
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026

Upcoming

Escore Tournament S3: W4
ASL S22 SEASON OPEN Day 2
Escore Tournament S3: W5
CSLAN 4
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
HSC XXX
SC4ALL II: StarCraft II
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
Light Tournament 2026
Eternal Conflict S2 Finale
Stake Ranked Episode 4
Logitech G Connect 2026
StarSeries Fall 2026
FISSURE Playground #5
BLAST Open Fall 2026
Esports World Cup 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer Qual
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.