EPT
What does it mean to ask someone out on a date?
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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Zvenn3n
Sweden1196 Posts
b. One's companion on such an outing. Taken from http://www.thefreedictionary.com/date Basically; if you ask someone out on a date, you either have the HotS (see what I did there?) for them, or have something you want to thank them for / anything else. The first one is the most common. | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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Zvenn3n
Sweden1196 Posts
If you don't, then you have some options. If you want to decide the date of the date (I know, it sounds stupid) with them, then you can call them basically whenever (well, preferably not too early or late), but if you want to have the date on the same day, then call them so that they have a good amount of time to prepare. I don't know whether you want to ask a woman or man out on a date, but women often use a ton of time to prepare for dates, so you shouldn't call them 17:45 and ask if they want to meet at a restaurant at 18 sharp. Basically, decide how you want to do, and devise a strategy for the date from there on. | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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phiinix
United States1169 Posts
Basically, you agree to do something with someone... and that's a date. Edit: If you're like actually interested in this person, phone can be WAY more awkward than in person (by phone i mean phone call, not texting or something). Unless you're naturally a phone person or she/he is, phone conversations can feel really weird really fast. Maybe you're a natural, but as someone posting who doesn't know what a date is, and doesn't know how to approach it.. I'm a bit worried. | ||
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Synwave
United States2803 Posts
You can certainly call and ask about a date if your on pretty familiar level with the person. If not I suggest calling to just talk and see how it goes. If its a fun conversation then towards the end, shoot that date request in there! gl | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something? Also, the guy she's going with told me a couple weeks ago that they're only going together because he 'can't back out' of it now and that she didn't want to go with him and would rather have gone with somebody else (I was quoted as one of the alternatives that she suggested) if she could have. i'm just an asian guy with no experience in anything except math/piano wat do? halp | ||
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Zvenn3n
Sweden1196 Posts
On June 11 2012 03:27 meguca wrote: Ok, this is the part I'm not sure about: Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something? Hmm... tough one. I usually don't deal with these kind of scenarios. I guess you could, as Synwave said, call and just talk for a while. Maybe ask how the prom was? If the conversation seems like it's going well (hard to describe, but you will probably notice) then just ask her about the date near the end. | ||
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sam!zdat
United States5559 Posts
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Jinsho
United Kingdom3101 Posts
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slytown
Korea (South)1411 Posts
On June 11 2012 03:20 meguca wrote: I like the idea of calling them. I'm way too shy to do this in person... It's pretty taboo. Unless you've known them for awhile, it's better to just ask in person. And, try not to use the word "date." Dates are for kids in the 1920s; Ask her to do something interesting or grab some coffee somewhere. Teamliquid: Getting nerds social contact since 2000. | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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Navane
Netherlands2762 Posts
On June 11 2012 03:32 sam!zdat wrote: My regrets from high school all involve having too little balls... much better to err on the side of making a fool of yourself and going for it. Yeap. Just don't let her friendzone you too | ||
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theonemephisto
United States409 Posts
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meguca
United States78 Posts
On June 11 2012 03:32 sam!zdat wrote: My regrets from high school all involve having too little balls... much better to err on the side of making a fool of yourself and going for it. Yeah that's true - the same for my regrets as well. I suppose I shouldn't be too cautious/analytical about everything.. | ||
Peeano
Netherlands5908 Posts
or perhaps this one: | ||
rotinegg
United States1719 Posts
On June 11 2012 03:27 meguca wrote: Ok, this is the part I'm not sure about: Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something? Also, the guy she's going with told me a couple weeks ago that they're only going together because he 'can't back out' of it now and that she didn't want to go with him and would rather have gone with somebody else (I was quoted as one of the alternatives that she suggested) if she could have. i'm just an asian guy with no experience in anything except math/piano wat do? halp not 1-2days later, NAO throwing you in the list of potential prom dates was either a pity gesture, or more likely her screaming ASK ME OUT | ||
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Synwave
United States2803 Posts
On June 11 2012 06:04 rotinegg wrote: not 1-2days later, NAO throwing you in the list of potential prom dates was either a pity gesture, or more likely her screaming ASK ME OUT I agree with rotinegg on this having read this latest update. Get in there (on the phone if you must) and get a date going duder. You will regret not asking more than asking and possibly it not working out. | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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Kvz
United States463 Posts
edit: oh my advice would be to just tell her you like her and ask if she wants to hang out. then go grab dinner and see a movie. yay | ||
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Chocolate
United States2350 Posts
Do not chicken out, I have the same problem you have but I am improving. Most important thing is to not be afraid of failyre or rejection. You will never become socially normal if you don't try and make mistakes. | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
then i said we could get dinner sometime, and she said alright, i'll talk to you later that was easier than i thought but also not as successful as i'd hoped WELL - back to piano practice for today, hopefully i can get the first 2.5 pages of fantaisie impromptu solidly under my belt with a couple more hours your thoughts, TL? | ||
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Narcind
Sweden2489 Posts
And after reading that last post, you probably should've set an actual time for it, but since you didn't, just make sure you don't wait too long to follow up on it. | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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sam!zdat
United States5559 Posts
On June 11 2012 07:17 meguca wrote: oh my god why am i so bad at talking to girls because you are boy | ||
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meguca
United States78 Posts
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NagAfightinG
United Kingdom270 Posts
On June 11 2012 05:56 s.Q.uelched wrote: Here you go: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxBOSdl-b54 or perhaps this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfOoMlojtbo Baller dating tips from the 1950's. | ||
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Disregard
China10252 Posts
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meguca
United States78 Posts
On June 11 2012 08:51 Disregard wrote: Its going to be awkward if you don't do a casual approach, I mean since you knew this person for a period it shouldn't be difficult right? i have 0 social skills irl | ||
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mastergriggy
United States1312 Posts
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rotinegg
United States1719 Posts
social skills are learned through experience. you will crash and burn many times over and say things that will make you cringe even five years later every time you think about it, but that's the only way to learn. get on it, you have a long journey ahead. | ||
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Cowpieguy
United States97 Posts
1. She already seems at least somewhat interested in you. That means you don't have to do anything or be anybody that you aren't already. If you are afraid that you aren't confident or funny or have no social skills or whatever, it doesn't matter. She's already interested in you because of who you are, so you don't have to change anything about yourself. Just relax. In high school I always made the mistake of thinking I wasn't good enough when a girl showed interest in me. But the fact is that if she is interested in you, then you are already good enough. Just being relaxed and not putting pressure on yourself is the most important thing you can do. 2. If the thought of a date freaks you out, just think of it as doing something fun with a friend. Don't over think it. Just try to have fun. If you are having fun, then she will have fun too. 3. Physical contact. Physical contact is the best way to create a romantic relationship. Hugs are good and probably the easiest. Give her a hug when you meet her to hang out or say goodbye after hanging out. Also, small, playful touches are good. A light touch on the arm is good. Eventually, once you both are comfortable with physical contact, it can progress to holding hands and eventually kissing, which I'm assuming you would enjoy. No pressure, gl hf | ||
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felisconcolori
United States6169 Posts
On June 11 2012 06:24 Kvz wrote: more and more it seems like the teamliquid blog section has become the 'help a nerdy high school kid get with girls' section lol edit: oh my advice would be to just tell her you like her and ask if she wants to hang out. then go grab dinner and see a movie. yay Hey, I could always post a blog looking for advice, then it could be 30something divorcees asking for how to get with girls. =p Actual advice - actually, I got nothing. (see above) Call, talk to her, if there is some kind of function or activity related to your common experience (a dance, a party, concert, something along those lines) ask her if she would want to go? I think that's how it works. (Yes, I managed to get engaged twice and married once without ever knowing how to actually go about asking someone out. Beyond that point, I do better.) | ||
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vanskater
United States146 Posts
On June 11 2012 06:21 meguca wrote: what the hell am i supposed to actually say though? i have no idea how to approach this. call her, or go up to her in person. "hey (so and so), i would like to take you out to (dinner, lunch, bowling, some activity) on (such ans such date) at or around (time of activity). would you like to go?" also dont use the term "hang out" hanging out is something friends do and i assume you dont want to be "just friends" with this girl. it is always best to be direct with your intentions when it comes to dating. be sure to report back what she says. | ||
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Raven068
United States90 Posts
The most important thing though is that you have the balls to do it and to back down if she says no. You'll be that much more badass either way. If you're still feeling nervous try asking your parents (especially your dad, if you're a guy). They probably have been down this road already and know you a heck of alot better than we do. They might have good advice. And in any case, good luck! | ||
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ecstatica
United States542 Posts
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ecstatica
United States542 Posts
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YoureFired
United States822 Posts
"Oh by the way, you want to go get coffee/lunch/(anything casual and enjoyable) sometime?" Either she'll say yes or no. If she says yes, just figure out a time and place and good job! If she says no or does some weird way of dodging it, well you tried. But it already sounds like she is at least open to you so just ask her | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46466 Posts
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Synwave
United States2803 Posts
On June 11 2012 10:05 rotinegg wrote: social skills are learned through experience. you will crash and burn many times over and say things that will make you cringe even five years later every time you think about it, but that's the only way to learn. get on it, you have a long journey ahead. True life right here^ For every awesome date and girlfriend experience Ive had Ive had multi-crash burn situations. They got less over time but they still happen even now. Social media makes us think every artist makes the perfect picture, every song writer writes a hit the first time. This is simply not true. You gotta fall to learn to stand my man. Try and fail, try and succeed, but either way, try and Learn! | ||
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Sigh
Canada2433 Posts
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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vanskater
United States146 Posts
On June 12 2012 00:01 Sigh wrote: Here's a question (sorry to hijack your thread but I feel it is somewhat relevant): Say you're pretty good friends with this girl, and have known her for a long time. When you ask her out on a "date", how would you get her to know it's not just "hanging out as friends"? Would you have to straight up confess? you say i want to take you out on a date. not lets hang out some time. | ||
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