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Active: 1363 users

What does it mean to ask someone out on a date?

Blogs > meguca
Post a Reply
1 2 3 Next All
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
June 10 2012 17:34 GMT
#1
I can't figure out what the actual definition is, or how one would go about doing so. It really confounds me... People discuss it so much, yet I have no idea what it really means.

**
Zvenn3n
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Sweden1196 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-06-10 17:47:29
June 10 2012 17:41 GMT
#2
a. An engagement to go out socially with another person, often out of romantic interest.
b. One's companion on such an outing.


Taken from http://www.thefreedictionary.com/date

Basically; if you ask someone out on a date, you either have the HotS (see what I did there?) for them, or have something you want to thank them for / anything else. The first one is the most common.
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
June 10 2012 17:47 GMT
#3
Okay, so if I have someone's phone number, do I just give them a call at some arbitrary point in the day?
Zvenn3n
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Sweden1196 Posts
June 10 2012 18:04 GMT
#4
Do you meet this someone in person often? If so, try and ask them when you meet them.

If you don't, then you have some options. If you want to decide the date of the date (I know, it sounds stupid) with them, then you can call them basically whenever (well, preferably not too early or late), but if you want to have the date on the same day, then call them so that they have a good amount of time to prepare. I don't know whether you want to ask a woman or man out on a date, but women often use a ton of time to prepare for dates, so you shouldn't call them 17:45 and ask if they want to meet at a restaurant at 18 sharp.

Basically, decide how you want to do, and devise a strategy for the date from there on.
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
June 10 2012 18:20 GMT
#5
I like the idea of calling them. I'm way too shy to do this in person...
phiinix
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States1169 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-06-10 18:26:21
June 10 2012 18:21 GMT
#6
This is cute.

Basically, you agree to do something with someone... and that's a date.

Edit: If you're like actually interested in this person, phone can be WAY more awkward than in person (by phone i mean phone call, not texting or something). Unless you're naturally a phone person or she/he is, phone conversations can feel really weird really fast. Maybe you're a natural, but as someone posting who doesn't know what a date is, and doesn't know how to approach it.. I'm a bit worried.
Synwave
Profile Joined July 2009
United States2803 Posts
June 10 2012 18:25 GMT
#7
Its a social engagement to do something together usually with the implied interest of seeing if there is romantic compatibility or furthering that compatibility if you two are already dating.

You can certainly call and ask about a date if your on pretty familiar level with the person. If not I suggest calling to just talk and see how it goes. If its a fun conversation then towards the end, shoot that date request in there!

gl
♞Nerdrage is the cause of global warming♞
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-06-10 18:30:05
June 10 2012 18:27 GMT
#8
Ok, this is the part I'm not sure about:

Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something?

Also, the guy she's going with told me a couple weeks ago that they're only going together because he 'can't back out' of it now and that she didn't want to go with him and would rather have gone with somebody else (I was quoted as one of the alternatives that she suggested) if she could have.

i'm just an asian guy with no experience in anything except math/piano

wat do? halp
Zvenn3n
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Sweden1196 Posts
June 10 2012 18:31 GMT
#9
On June 11 2012 03:27 meguca wrote:
Ok, this is the part I'm not sure about:

Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something?


Hmm... tough one. I usually don't deal with these kind of scenarios. I guess you could, as Synwave said, call and just talk for a while. Maybe ask how the prom was? If the conversation seems like it's going well (hard to describe, but you will probably notice) then just ask her about the date near the end.
sam!zdat
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States5559 Posts
June 10 2012 18:32 GMT
#10
My regrets from high school all involve having too little balls... much better to err on the side of making a fool of yourself and going for it.
shikata ga nai
Jinsho
Profile Joined March 2011
United Kingdom3101 Posts
June 10 2012 19:02 GMT
#11
Just ask her to spend some time together, at a coffee shop or whatever. It's unlikely that she'll be instantly free anyways, so just say "hey are you free on Saturday, we could have some coffee in town" or whatever.
slytown
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Korea (South)1411 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-06-10 19:18:55
June 10 2012 19:14 GMT
#12
On June 11 2012 03:20 meguca wrote:
I like the idea of calling them. I'm way too shy to do this in person...


It's pretty taboo. Unless you've known them for awhile, it's better to just ask in person.

And, try not to use the word "date." Dates are for kids in the 1920s; Ask her to do something interesting or grab some coffee somewhere.

Teamliquid: Getting nerds social contact since 2000.
The best Flash meme ever: http://imgur.com/zquoK
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
June 10 2012 19:32 GMT
#13
I've known them for >5 years.
Navane
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Netherlands2749 Posts
June 10 2012 19:46 GMT
#14
On June 11 2012 03:32 sam!zdat wrote:
My regrets from high school all involve having too little balls... much better to err on the side of making a fool of yourself and going for it.


Yeap. Just don't let her friendzone you too
theonemephisto
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States409 Posts
June 10 2012 19:51 GMT
#15
Next time you see her, just ask if she wants to go to a movie or get dinner or something. Movies are less "date-ey", while dinner is a bit more of a commitment. Coffee is also nice and informal. Make sure you actually set up a place and time. And go enjoy. If you both enjoy it, suggest doing something again sometime, and maybe call her later.
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
June 10 2012 20:12 GMT
#16
On June 11 2012 03:32 sam!zdat wrote:
My regrets from high school all involve having too little balls... much better to err on the side of making a fool of yourself and going for it.


Yeah that's true - the same for my regrets as well. I suppose I shouldn't be too cautious/analytical about everything..
Peeano
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Netherlands5198 Posts
June 10 2012 20:56 GMT
#17
Here you go:


or perhaps this one:
FBH #1!
rotinegg
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States1719 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-06-10 21:06:14
June 10 2012 21:04 GMT
#18
On June 11 2012 03:27 meguca wrote:
Ok, this is the part I'm not sure about:

Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something?

Also, the guy she's going with told me a couple weeks ago that they're only going together because he 'can't back out' of it now and that she didn't want to go with him and would rather have gone with somebody else (I was quoted as one of the alternatives that she suggested) if she could have.

i'm just an asian guy with no experience in anything except math/piano

wat do? halp

not 1-2days later, NAO
throwing you in the list of potential prom dates was either a pity gesture, or more likely her screaming ASK ME OUT
Translator
Synwave
Profile Joined July 2009
United States2803 Posts
June 10 2012 21:07 GMT
#19
On June 11 2012 06:04 rotinegg wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 11 2012 03:27 meguca wrote:
Ok, this is the part I'm not sure about:

Today is the day right after the senior prom (I didn't go), and she went with someone else.. but she told me earlier that she is basically actively trying to friendzone the guy she went with. Should I still wait 1-2 days before I ask her out to dinner or something?

Also, the guy she's going with told me a couple weeks ago that they're only going together because he 'can't back out' of it now and that she didn't want to go with him and would rather have gone with somebody else (I was quoted as one of the alternatives that she suggested) if she could have.

i'm just an asian guy with no experience in anything except math/piano

wat do? halp

not 1-2days later, NAO
throwing you in the list of potential prom dates was either a pity gesture, or more likely her screaming ASK ME OUT


I agree with rotinegg on this having read this latest update. Get in there (on the phone if you must) and get a date going duder.
You will regret not asking more than asking and possibly it not working out.
♞Nerdrage is the cause of global warming♞
meguca
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States78 Posts
June 10 2012 21:21 GMT
#20
what the hell am i supposed to actually say though? i have no idea how to approach this.
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