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Hi TL,
i just saw this movie review and it got me thinking.
Who would earth send to a interplanetary fighting tournament right now?
To clarify this, let me lay down the rules:
- The tournament happens in 6 month from this day. That would be the time the fighter has to prepare.
- The tournament is weapon-free body combat. It is fought with minimal to no protection. Small fingerless fighting-gloves or feet protectors are allowed though, if the fighter wants to wear them.
- The aliens that will fight in the tournament can be assumed to be in a basic human-shaped form, i.e. have a torso, a head and 4 limbs. Proportions of these may vary though.
- The maximum weight of a fighter must not exceed 200 kg / 441 lbs. Below that no weight classes exist.
- Fights happens in boxing-ring type of arena. In rounds of 5minutes with a 1minute break in between. They can end in surrender (tapping out), knockout or even death. No point-system bullshit.
- "Dirty fighting" is allowed. As it is unkown where the weakspots of each alien race are, there are no forbidden hitzones. Whatever you think are weakspots (eyes, crotch, small limbs, etc.) you are good to go for these. The only thing the referee looks for is one of the losing conditions mentioned above.
- At stake is humanities freedom. All losing species must serve the winner as slaves for a decade until the next tournament.
So now the main question: WHO WOULD WE SEND?
You may name one fighter and one stand-in, if one gets injured during training or so...
Okay, to make it more fun, you can name two pairs of fighters:
Pair 1: Must be alive and non-fictional, i.e. actual real fighters of now. One Fighter, one Stand-in.
Pair 2: Must only be non-ficitional. No "Son-Goku" or "Dr.Manhattan" bs please 
 
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Can we only consider people who are alive?
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Look at my edit @Grovbolle
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Would something change if we lost?
I'd send some psycho killer. OD him with all the drugs before the match.
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Does it have to be in their current form?
I mean Chuck Norris was pretty badass back in the days.
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obligatory chuck norris
jean claude van damme as stand in
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Bruce Lee, only viable choice.
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51709 Posts
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It's tough. What you would want to do is take a bunch of top athletes including the UFC heavyweights and give them the best performance enhancing drugs combination known to man. It would probably end up being Alistair Overeem who would have the best chance of winning but then again, if someone like Lebron James has any natural fighting skills, he has the athletic qualities necessary, he could get to about 260-70 of lean muscle, and hurt some aliens.
Basically no UFC fighters or boxers under heavyweight would be able to cut it, they would be destroyed by a 300lb+ alien like Goro. Although I do think a fighter like anderson silva or floyd mayweather might be good enough and accurate enough to strike any weakpoints and fast enough to escape.
But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb.
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I'd send myself and just bank on the fact that all aliens will melt when I pee on them. A stand in wouldn't be necessary because pee training isn't very dangerous.
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On April 30 2012 22:19 sc4k wrote:
It's tough. What you would want to do is take a bunch of top athletes including the UFC heavyweights and give them the best performance enhancing drugs combination known to man. It would probably end up being Alistair Overeem who would have the best chance of winning but then again, if someone like Lebron James has any natural fighting skills, he has the athletic qualities necessary, he could get to about 260-70 of lean muscle, and hurt some aliens.
Basically no UFC fighters or boxers under heavyweight would be able to cut it, they would be destroyed by a 300lb+ alien like Goro. Although I do think a fighter like anderson silva or floyd mayweather might be good enough and accurate enough to strike any weakpoints and fast enough to escape.
But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb.
Hey, that's actually a good idea, let's just send in a Gorilla or Orangutan and claim it's a person. The aliens will never know the difference. :p
Also, how would we train these people? This is a deathmatch, right? So that implies that fighting styles would have to be adapted to be able to make best use of there actually being no rules. I don't know much about fighting styles though, so maybe someone else should make suggestions.
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![[image loading]](http://images2.fanpop.com/images/polls/223000/223013_1240066071235_full.jpg)
Seriously, how can you NOT send Tom Cruise?
It's a win-win situation really, plus I'm sure he knows more about the aliens than anyone else.
You can send this guy as his stand-in.
![[image loading]](http://cdn.geckoandfly.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/ancient_aliens_guy.jpg)
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On April 30 2012 22:19 sc4k wrote:
But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb.
You sure about this? I mean, your average office worker who does no exercise sure, but any trained extremely strong anf fit human? More intelligent and more experienced and trained in fighting I can't see why the chimp would be stronger, or at least strong enough to beat a trained fighter in combat.
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On April 30 2012 22:56 Slayer91 wrote:Show nested quote +On April 30 2012 22:19 sc4k wrote:
But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb. You sure about this? I mean, your average office worker who does no exercise sure, but any trained extremely strong anf fit human? More intelligent and more experienced and trained in fighting I can't see why the chimp would be stronger, or at least strong enough to beat a trained fighter in combat.
I think he is talking muscle capacity and fighting skills assuming that the chimp is of equal intelligence.
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On April 30 2012 22:56 Slayer91 wrote:Show nested quote +On April 30 2012 22:19 sc4k wrote:
But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb. You sure about this? I mean, your average office worker who does no exercise sure, but any trained extremely strong anf fit human? More intelligent and more experienced and trained in fighting I can't see why the chimp would be stronger, or at least strong enough to beat a trained fighter in combat.
We aren't a natural built predator. We have to use tools to hunt, unlike animals such as a lion. We didn't evolve to be the fastest and strongest animals alive, we evolved to be the most adaptable. I'd send a gorilla to go fight, the average gorilla has 6-10 times more upper body strength than a human and I'd imagine is much more resilient as well.
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I'd send jaedong to stare some fuckers down
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An intergalactic fight for the future of humanity? Oh, wait... humans potentially can't cut it?
Send the gorillas.
Rise of the Planet of the Apes II.
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is it fair that its un-armred combat i mean humans main weapon are tools like making stuff, imagine a lion-alien in a gun fight 0_o damn that would be awesome, but yeah probaby bruce lee if it was alive the man practically does nothing but train (well obvsiouly not anymore) this reminds me of AvP where we basically suck....
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All I see is another reason to learn necromancy to revive Bruce Lee.
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EPT
