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Failure

Blogs > fatfail
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fatfail
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States386 Posts
March 31 2012 05:52 GMT
#1
I'm currently in high school. My grades are quite mediocre, and I'm quite bad at all my extracurricular activities. I often see my peers excelling in academics, sports, music, etc while I remain lousy. I then tell myself I need to work harder, but even when I do, I remain shitty. I'm just not good at anything. What a depressing situation, I most likely won't go to any decent college. Do any of you guys also often feel like an underachiever under self scrutiny?

*
Kong fan... <3 Stork <3 Jangbi <3 Yellow <3 Fantasy
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
March 31 2012 05:53 GMT
#2
Hey, fatfail, maybe it's a confidence issue.
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44437 Posts
March 31 2012 05:55 GMT
#3
You should probably start by getting a more badass Team Liquid screen name That'll boost your confidence

But seriously, there are surely a few things you're decent (or even excel) at. Find your talents and focus on them.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
fatfail
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States386 Posts
March 31 2012 05:57 GMT
#4
The problem is, I'm asian, so when I describe my achievements I will sound like I'm gloating, when in fact, I'm really fucking terrible in comparison to my peers. Affirmative action doesn't help either.
Kong fan... <3 Stork <3 Jangbi <3 Yellow <3 Fantasy
RogerX
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
New Zealand3180 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-31 06:23:34
March 31 2012 05:58 GMT
#5
Well being down about it isn't gonna help anything. Actually, it'll make it worse. So chin up soldier.
Stick it up. take it up. step aside and see the world
Stratos
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Czech Republic6104 Posts
March 31 2012 05:59 GMT
#6
Uhm not really, I don't know if I ever felt like an underachiever. I do often feel like someone rewarded for their mindset and skills, which are overall pretty terrible. But hey I can stil find a reason to live, a passion to pursue. Although I have lots of respect for the people pushing things to their limits, I have never felt the need myself.

If you lead a happy life, you're far from an underachiever. And to lead a happy life you don't necessarily need to be good in anything but living itself.
En Taro Violet
fatfail
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States386 Posts
March 31 2012 06:01 GMT
#7
Hm, thanks for the motivation/consolation guys. Yeah, my tl username and signature don't exactly exude confidence.
Kong fan... <3 Stork <3 Jangbi <3 Yellow <3 Fantasy
Bagration
Profile Blog Joined October 2011
United States18282 Posts
March 31 2012 06:07 GMT
#8
Here's some advice: It's best not to compare yourself with other high achieving Asians. If you hear everyday about that guy who got into Harvard, that girl who got that full ride into medical school, that guy who became a Rhodes Scholar, that girl who got to perform at Obama's innaugration, etc. you're going to feel like shit about yourself and your accomplishments.

What do you do? Forget them. From what I've seen, Asian communities enjoy talking about their best and brightest, so the performance of the entire Asian community is inflated. Focus on yourself, and set personal goals for yourself, not based off of the "perfect" model Asian.

Source: Personal experiences and observations
Team Slayers, Axiom-Acer and Vile forever
ShadowDrgn
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States2497 Posts
March 31 2012 06:30 GMT
#9
Achievement is a lifelong goal. You aren't going to go from a mediocre underachiever into a superstar overnight -- it's a long process that requires dedication. Your peers that are excelling have probably always been at the top, and as they get better, they remain at the top. Even if you work as hard as them, you won't close the gap, and if you work harder, you still have a lot of improvement to make to get to their level.

The good news is that you're still in high school; you have the vast majority of your life still ahead of you. Start working harder today, and just work at improving yourself day by day. Don't get discouraged if you aren't the best next week, next month, or next year. Set personal goals, better yourself, and stop comparing yourself to everyone else around you.
Of course, you only live one life, and you make all your mistakes, and learn what not to do, and that’s the end of you.
English
Profile Joined April 2010
United States475 Posts
March 31 2012 06:42 GMT
#10
Try focusing on getting good grades. Doesn't have to be the best, but aim higher than what you think you can achieve (and keep out of the C range). Then be more active in a handful of extracurriculars, again you don't have to be great at it, just participate as much as you can. Then practice taking the SATs until you get the timing down, aim high, but focus on giving your best answer on ALL of the questions and completing the exam. You should be able to get into a decent college then.

If you don't get into a college of your choice, try taking a couple years in a JC and really boost your grades and then apply to a university.
NoScary
Profile Joined November 2010
United States151 Posts
March 31 2012 06:57 GMT
#11
You have to find something you are passionate about, something you care about more than your own comfort or pleasure.
"And when he came back to, he was flat on his back on the beach in the freezing sand, and it was raining out of a low sky, and the tide was way out." From birth to death, no time to rest, no time to waste.
bITt.mAN
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Switzerland3693 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-31 07:21:56
March 31 2012 07:21 GMT
#12
Having done multiple things to a significant degree of competition, I say competitiveness sucks. Especially with high-schoolers gloating about their inflated self-image. Heh maybe they're better than their peers, but seems like they still haven't matured to an adult world, plus there are many people out there who are more qualified and /experienced/ than them (in real life, it's not 'how good for your age', it's 'how good, period').

This is what I've realized, and how I deal with the fact that some people can get to a level of proficiency at something that I've put years into: there are somethings people are objectively JUST BETTER THAN YOU at. Hey wait, that says 'objectively', but as humans we have no right to say 'objectively better' because we can't see or measure that.

You're only truly measured 'how far you've gotten' versus 'your own potential'. You're gonna have to accept different people have different potentials, but what's more important is that you fulfull what you CAN do. Different ~objective~ achievements have different value for different people, so don't get down by self-entitiled kids, put your head down and work -not for the sake of what people say about you, but for your own (satisfaction's) sake.
BW4LYF . . . . . . PM me, I LOVE PMs. . . . . . Long live "NaDa's Body" . . . . . . Fantasy | Bisu/Best | Jaedong . . . . .
Kyhol
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada2575 Posts
March 31 2012 08:39 GMT
#13
Work hard and be determined. That's all anyone can ask.
In the process of working hard and being determined to create a better life for yourself you will find confidence, with that confidence you'll create your own direction in life.
Wishing you well.
Grohg
Profile Joined March 2011
United States243 Posts
March 31 2012 08:51 GMT
#14
If you have something to gloat about, that means you're doing something right. You don't need to be the next household name to be successful and you don't have to even worry about what everyone else is doing either. If you don't get into some super prestigious school, it's ok...honestly. Is your goal to be recognized or is it to be someone who does something with their life that they are passionate about? Turn your passion into your focus and set a goal that you CAN achieve. Use that momentum you get from succeeding to carry you to your next goal. High school isn't that big of a deal in the long run...I promise. It's a stepping stone to something else, university. I know for a fact that you are capable of doing something good. Everyone who wasn't born with a severe handicap has the potential to make something of themselves (some who ARE severely handicapped do it as well).

It's often not about the amount of hours you put into something but rather the way you approach that time. Learn to critically analyze things you do and point out the underlying weaknesses rather than throwing a blanket statement out there like "I'm not good at <insert activity>." Find out what it is that you specifically are struggling with and address that issue. Some things you simply don't need to focus on...if you know that music isn't your deal then don't make that a priority. Do what you need to do to get past the hurdle and get yourself into a spot where you feel comfortable.

Some people will do well in high school and be average in college while others will thrive in the college environment even if high school wasn't their best 4 years. You'll have more flexibility to choose what you like and you will actually have a chance to branch out from the basic liberal arts education that we have in the states. You'll still have your core classes that you have to take but I challenge you to choose elective courses that seem like they might be interesting. I started off as a computer science major but took a cognitive psychology class that I really enjoyed. The comp sci was alright but I didn't see myself doing that as a job so I changed my major and jumped into psychology and neuroscience. I'm now applying for grad school to do the same thing but I would have never been able to tell you that when I was in high school.

Focus on the next step...life is all about figuring out how to deal with the crap that gets thrown at you, minimizing its affect, and pushing forward with the things that really matter to you. You aren't bad because someone else does something better, and you can't fail because you see someone else succeeding at a level you aren't right now. The only failure that will happen is if you decide that you can't succeed. We're all our own limiting factor...your potential is there for you to seize and if you make an effort to tap into that resource, you WILL NOT be a failure.
You can't spell slaughter without laughter.
teamamerica
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States958 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-31 09:19:43
March 31 2012 09:14 GMT
#15
Depressing blog right as college acceptances are all out? All isn't lost man, CC program into transfer, if you aren't happy with your current selection of colleges. Let this be a wakeup call. Trust me man, if college acceptances are your biggest issues, which for most high schoolers they are, you're in a relatively great situation. I'm a much bigger fuck-up then you, but I won't spill my issues into your bog. All the same, dwelling on mistakes doesn't really get you anywhere, so all you can do is aspire to work harder and keep improving.

Sure there will be people who are better at you at stuff. Maybe even things you work in, or things you have a passion for. But at the end of the day, if you can tell yourself you tried your hardest, there's nothing to be ashamed of. Be a decent person, give it try your hardest, raise a family maybe, and then you die. They straight up make movies about people like this. I mean how many people do you find honestly give their 100% in anything in life? That's admirable.

Think of Starcraft II pro's. Most don't win big tournaments. Look at MajOr. He hasn't won shit, in SC or SCII. But he's pretty well known for his work-ethic, for how hard he tries. That and his seventeen name changes. But also for his work ethic. Look at that random dude, CarN, who got a mini-cult on TL just because he busted his ass in Korea, despite not having any results. Follow any sport league and there are people known for just trying as hard as they can, no matter their actual results. In school everyone knows the kids who study all the time and try as hard as they can. People respect hard-work.

Bottom line - don't worry about results. Do your best. Profit.
RIP GOMTV. RIP PROLEAGUE.
Tektos
Profile Joined November 2010
Australia1321 Posts
March 31 2012 09:41 GMT
#16
Don't compare yourself to others just try your hardest. It is really quite simple.

If you're not trying your hardest you only have yourself to blame.
SoniC_eu
Profile Joined April 2011
Denmark1008 Posts
March 31 2012 12:23 GMT
#17
You are exactly where u are supposed to be. I would start looking at what you have, rather than what you lack. Just being alive and having shelter&food is not so common on Earth. If you throw in family, education and a computer, well buddy then you are in fact part of Earth's human elite. That's something all we TL'ers can be grateful for....
Look at things you appreciate and what you enjoy in your life. The asian college race doesn't define life, as you will see in 10-15 yrs, as long as you're happy and doing something you enjoy. Getting an education is always a good idea IMO. But beating yourself up and (Sry) whining is just going to hamper the natural development of life.
So, name 3 things you enjoy. And your 3 fondest memories Let's start there.
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure. http://da.twitch.tv/sonic_eu
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
March 31 2012 14:28 GMT
#18
Dude, I suck massive-ly, MASSIVE-ly at starcraft, I'm number 6 on my tennis team which is division 2 A in highschool on a good day, and I'm a noob at Blender and Maya 3-d modeling; This all being said, that doesn't mean you are underachieving. I have supposedly great grades because i work for them, I work my ass off for everything I do, but that doesn't mean i get immidiate rewards. Most times it takes months if not years to get good at anything, i start off kind of like this because i am so bad, and then end up like this, finally breaking through to the other side after trying so hard for so long .

My point here is not that I'm very successful, but that success takes time, also I suggest, just as everyone else has said, to chin up, soldier . Believe me it helps. Confidence in yourself is the fast track to success, and you can be smiling all along the way to it .
User was warned for too many mimes.
iSometric
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
2221 Posts
March 31 2012 14:43 GMT
#19
You could not go to college and be more successful than a person with a full ride to MIT. Believe in yourself, anything can happen.
strava.com/athletes/zhaodynasty
Cheater23
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States34 Posts
March 31 2012 15:15 GMT
#20
Like DocVoc said, there is always someone better,stronger, smarter,faster etc.

It ultimately comes down to what you dedicate your time and patience to. Even then success requires a bit of luck.

But the way you live basically boils down to two decisions. You can 1.) Continue the way you've done things or 2.) Change

If you aren't happy with the way things are, choose the latter and make em the way you want.
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