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Battle Report: Mass Proxies and Redemption

Blogs > ninazerg
Post a Reply
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-02-07 18:03:30
February 07 2012 17:58 GMT
#1
This is a tale of woe and redemption. Whether you play StarCraft 2 or StarCraft: BroodWar, I hope you will enjoy this magical journey into the magical kingdom of magic.

Warning
+ Show Spoiler +
This story is not intended for young children under the age of 16, the elderly, people prone to epilepsy, and the mentally unstable.


Our story begins in the court of the mighty and legendary Sayle, StarCraft: BroodWar's new hope, and a savior of ESPORTS. Back in ye olde days, the legends echo of his exploits and manliness, which he forever carved into our hearts with the mighty psi-blades of Aiur. His streamed events would attract spectators from throughout the land; the poorest of vagabonds to the wealthiest of merchants. These said events were battles-to-the-death in the blood-stained arenas of the latest and trendiest Proleague maps, and as these intrepid warriors would clash with their mightiest and most imbalanced of units, the commanding and omnipotent voice of Sayle would narrate every ingenious movement that these warp-speed chessmasters would execute!

One fateful day, I sought to set my delicate feet into that arena. In the midst of that deadly abode, I was struck senseless by the jeers of the rowdy and bloodthirsty audience, and in my confusion and panic, succumbed to the painful humiliation of being defeated by the lowliest of newbs. I then only sought to hide my face in shame from this horrendous and debilitating blow to my pride. Many of my comrades petitioned for my comfort, but alas! 'Twas in vain - I could not be consoled. There was only one path to vindication and resolution: REVENGE.

This is the story of that vengeance.


During my stay in purgatory, I decided to quit StarCraft. Worst decision ever. Don't ever do that, because StarCraft is awesome. What's not awesome is being taunted constantly with things like, "Girls can't play StarCraft" (which I'm pretty much desensitized to; I've heard it a billion times or so.) and "You lost to Eywa."

Oh, Eywa.

We used to be friends... where did it go so wrong? I guess it all started when he started being a royal JERK to everyone. But let's not focus on that so much right now, and rather, let's talk about this battle report thingy. I finally got some sweet sweet delicious yummy revenge when I stream-sniped Eywa, and apparently, he did not take kindly to that. So, a couple days ago, while hangin' out in Op Teamliquid on iCCup, I was all, like, "Yo yo, anyone wanna play?" and ended up playing Eywa, which I did not KNOW was Eywa until after the fact.

So, let's get into it:

[image loading]

There's a base within my base!

Being Eywa, it's in his blood to make proxies. He did a proxy gate build while smurfing against Puppykiller and decided to be a total meanie by posting a super-lame battle report on TL, bragging about how he defeated Puppykiller, so in a way, this blog is also for YOU, Puppykiller.

[image loading]

Another proxy.

[image loading]

Another proxy.

[image loading]

Another proxy.

So, okay, let me stop for a second. Some of the games that I lost to Eywa during the grudgematches were actually a blessing in disguise. I learned a lot from my mistakes and was able to improve my Zerg vs Protoss and my responses to proxies. Admittedly, the first proxy in this match took me by surprise, and I lost 3-4 drones to stop it from going up, but after that, I just let the probe go nuts making proxy buildings.

You see, if you play Protoss, you know that you need to be as efficient as possible to make sure your tech is on time, otherwise, what will happen is the Zerg's tech will allow them to snowball the game into an insurmountable victory. The margin for error, unfortunately, is not very favorable for Protoss in PvZ, and every time you make a proxy, it must do damage, because the construction of the proxy will delay your tech. I knew that letting him build more proxies would just increase my advantage.

[image loading]

A very sad empty crib where a base should be.

[image loading]

My overlord sees everything. I do see a spinning cybernetics core but no stargate. This obviously means he's going to have very late corsairs, or is making dragoon range AND getting zealot speed. Seriously, what is this? C'mon... really?

[image loading]

The best counter to proxies is Mutalisks.

[image loading]

At 13:00 into our game, we see a Templar Archives arriving on the scene, most likely to archive some templars.

[image loading]

When Ultralisks are battering away at your front, the proper response is to build an empty shuttle. The empty shuttle can be used to float around, completely empty, and act as a floating vessel of emptiness. I have to admit, the whole time I was playing, I was wondering "Is that shuttle empty?" but I sent a pair of scourge to SLAM-DUNK THAT SHUTTLE INTO A GARBAGE DUMPSTER.

[image loading]

The cows. They say hi. They say hi by ramming their gigantic horns into your feeble base, with a clear message on their minds: "Let it go, dawg, it's over."


Conclusion

Thus ends our tale. Only Oya can consistently win with pure proxies, because Swedish people are magic. People who attempt to copy-cat Oya's style will find themselves hopelessly behind in tech. Although proxies can take people by surprise, it's always important to be able to play a strong overall game.

NINA OUT!

-drops the mic-

****
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
corumjhaelen
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
France6884 Posts
February 07 2012 18:20 GMT
#2
Well, D+ vs C, what else can you try ?
‎numquam se plus agere quam nihil cum ageret, numquam minus solum esse quam cum solus esset
GeckoVOD
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
Germany814 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-02-07 18:24:12
February 07 2012 18:22 GMT
#3
nice blog 8)
@DonGeckone on Twitterstuff // JOIN THE YODA FANCLUB OR YOU'RE REALLY REALLY UNCOOL: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=398220
Essbee
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Canada2371 Posts
February 07 2012 18:30 GMT
#4
rofl that was an enjoyable read.
Harem
Profile Joined November 2007
United States11393 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-02-07 18:39:09
February 07 2012 18:38 GMT
#5
I don't think losing to Eywa ever goes away though.

It's like losing to Passion. (poor fold T_T)

People will never forget.

Ever
Moderator。◕‿◕。
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
February 07 2012 18:58 GMT
#6
On February 08 2012 03:38 Harem wrote:
I don't think losing to Eywa ever goes away though.

It's like losing to Passion. (poor fold T_T)

People will never forget.

Ever


Thank God I was able to beat PassiOn.
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
puppykiller
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States3137 Posts
February 07 2012 19:02 GMT
#7
Ha justice! The deceitful munchkins cowardly attack has been found and foiled! And now he must endure the just blade of public humiliation piercing his wretched heart, as he gazes up wide eyed and squinting like a(n asian) moon-calf!
Why would I play sctoo when I can play BW?
2Pacalypse-
Profile Joined October 2006
Croatia9530 Posts
February 07 2012 19:28 GMT
#8
haha, nice write up.

If only every Battle Report was written like this ^^
Moderator"We're a community of geniuses because we've found how to extract 95% of the feeling of doing something amazing without actually doing anything." - Chill
seRapH
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States9796 Posts
February 07 2012 20:26 GMT
#9
Very well done photoshop work. 5/5
boomer hands
Sayle
Profile Joined October 2010
United Kingdom3685 Posts
February 07 2012 20:30 GMT
#10
1/5

Didn't praise Sayle enough.
Essbee
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Canada2371 Posts
February 07 2012 20:36 GMT
#11
On February 08 2012 05:30 Sayle wrote:
1/5

Didn't praise Sayle enough.


You greedy bastard!
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
February 07 2012 20:57 GMT
#12
On February 08 2012 05:30 Sayle wrote:
1/5

Didn't praise Sayle enough.


Rats!

I'll reignite your passion yet...
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
dRaW
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
Canada5744 Posts
February 07 2012 21:12 GMT
#13
On February 08 2012 05:30 Sayle wrote:
1/5

Didn't praise Sayle enough.


Who's sayle? Nice screenshots and stuff, you should have drawn on them more.
I don't need luck, luck is for noobs, good luck to you though
soujiro_
Profile Joined June 2010
Uruguay5195 Posts
February 07 2012 21:21 GMT
#14
nice to see another bw battle report

ace hwaiting!!
X10A
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada9837 Posts
February 08 2012 00:38 GMT
#15
On February 08 2012 05:30 Sayle wrote:
1/5

Didn't praise Sayle enough.

Who is this Sayle character?
Always nice to see another BW BR <3
CJ/T8 Fighting//#1 STX and Bisu anti <3//YES X10A is based off the Freedom Gundam
Hyeon
Profile Blog Joined October 2011
Korea (South)462 Posts
February 08 2012 15:39 GMT
#16
5/5


dunno how could he be B rank >_>
oO
TL-TyranT
Profile Joined March 2010
United States87 Posts
February 08 2012 23:05 GMT
#17
I think I played Eywa before in his smurf ID and won in 10 mins, he is such a scrub needs to stop playin and hatin
"Don"T GiVe uP, dOnT gIvE iN, TiLL yOu MuSTeR All ThaT LieS WiTHiN, To LeaD YoU A ChAnCe To WiN! " NeLSoN Personal Epic Quote
Holy Check
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Romania155 Posts
February 08 2012 23:11 GMT
#18
For a second there, I thought she actually beat Sayle. That would've been lolol indeed.
serge
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Russian Federation142 Posts
February 08 2012 23:50 GMT
#19
I think it's fairly safe to say that no templar were archived during the process.
I am Malkovich.
sabas123
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Netherlands3122 Posts
February 13 2012 19:48 GMT
#20
On February 08 2012 05:30 Sayle wrote:
1/5

Didn't praise Sayle enough.

you lost to eywa?XD
The harder it becomes, the more you should focus on the basics.
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