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Hey guys, so you probably know me by now im a 17 year old in High school from USA. Go to Massachusetts for anyone who might be close by.
Anyways, over the past year, maybe even two I've had a huuuuge crush on this girl. I mean, I seriously felt like I loved her at one point(I don't) but I was thinking maybe I did. Anyways, we've gotten a lot closer, text a ton. Almost daily, and we sit next to each other in classes a lot. We always joke around about being a couple, she's a very sarcastic person. Anyways a few days I was hanging with my bro just going for a drive, and he told me she went to a party and fucked some dude. Basically, she lost her V card. I was rather surprised tbh, I mean I knew she partied(drank, smoke). But shes never had a bf or been known for anything like that. So today I was texting her best friend, and I basically through a phone call and a true heart to heart learned it was true(me and her best friend have become reallly tight). I mean, I'm a pretty easy going person I like to think. I am, like I just kinda go with shit. I've been broken up with, had gfs, and all that jazz. But for some reason this one really hit me, like a deep sinking feeling in my stomach, like she had cheated on me( but we never went out....lol loser). I mean, I know it doesn't matter much at all, but I just can't shake the feeling. Like, I should just move onto the next, tons of fish in the sea and its highschool.... but for some reason I just feel betrayed. Like I said we've been really tight and we flirt a looootttt, but she never even told me about this guy or about the whole thing in general. I just feel like that puppy whos a bitch and realllly wants one specific family, but they don't want him back.
I don't like making girl blogs, but I can't vent to anyone cuz the whole sex odreal is supposed to be a secret. Her best friend made me swear not to tell anyone, and I like to be true to promises. So I'm sorry to blemish our awesome forums with such a lame blog, but sometimes I just like to vent. Don't need advice, just need to tell someone the story. I'll move on I'll forget it, I just need to tell someone. And I'm so grateful for TL, always ready to be that someone. Thank you guys.
  
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you're friend zoned blah blah blah you should've acted faster
theres no point in feeling bad
should've put it in her before some other guy could at the party
it's all about mindset. theres no reason to feel bad. dont fall into the trap.
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Your feelings make sense. People might say that they don't, but I can see where you're coming from. Girls like to play around. Maybe make it seem like they like you, make you feel attached.
I was about to give some advice, but that's not what you're looking for. Just know your feelings aren't out of place.
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On November 17 2011 11:40 shawster wrote:
you're friend zoned blah blah blah you should've acted faster
theres no point in feeling bad
should've put it in her before some other guy could at the party
it's all about mindset. theres no reason to feel bad. dont fall into the trap.
Haha, I'm a junior I'll find some slutty sophomore and put it in her this weekend 
ACHIEVEMENT
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On November 17 2011 11:43 mptj wrote:Show nested quote +On November 17 2011 11:40 shawster wrote:
you're friend zoned blah blah blah you should've acted faster
theres no point in feeling bad
should've put it in her before some other guy could at the party
it's all about mindset. theres no reason to feel bad. dont fall into the trap. Haha, I'm a junior I'll find some slutty sophomore and put it in her this weekend ACHIEVEMENT
atta boy
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LolOLOLOLOL a V card never heard that one.
Sorry for your loss
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Hit me just as hard when I found out one of my first serious girlfriends wasn't and I was (a virgin). Mattered so much to me then I came so close to breaking it off. Glad I didn't though and I think it would be the wrong decision for you to break off the friendship.
Now that I'm no longer a virgin it doesn't matter to me. Your perspective will change and all those deep down feelings you have right now (she's a slut, fuck her, etc) will go away (hopefully). Good luck, sir.
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better get used to it. life is full of bad surprises and bitches.
on the other hand, wouldnt you have done the same thing if some ho just bent over for you at some party?
these undecided / shaping situations can be weard sometimes...
but from now on just treat her like a bitch or you'll feel bad that your cute&close classmate had some other guy's ... between her legs.
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I don't see the problem, at least now she's had some practice. You're telling me if you were drunk at a party you'd refuse some hot girl wanting to fuck you?
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On November 17 2011 11:44 shawster wrote:Show nested quote +On November 17 2011 11:43 mptj wrote:On November 17 2011 11:40 shawster wrote:
you're friend zoned blah blah blah you should've acted faster
theres no point in feeling bad
should've put it in her before some other guy could at the party
it's all about mindset. theres no reason to feel bad. dont fall into the trap. Haha, I'm a junior I'll find some slutty sophomore and put it in her this weekend ACHIEVEMENT atta boy
This will so sound horrible, but fuckin another chick has helped me get over chicks. Just something about it (my friends call it being pussy whipped when you can't get over a chick)
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dude, if the girl is ready to just fuck some random dude like that, then 9/10 chance she wasn't worth it in the first place.
Unless the dude in question was Brad Pitt or something, in which case there may be room for apologies..
Life is short, but long at the same time. You'll meet TONS (literally, metric fuckloads) of girls in college. I guarantee you will find a girl a million times better than any girl you're pining over right now.
The world is your oyster.
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On November 17 2011 11:40 Dalguno wrote:
Your feelings make sense. People might say that they don't, but I can see where you're coming from. Girls like to play around. Maybe make it seem like they like you, make you feel attached.
I was about to give some advice, but that's not what you're looking for. Just know your feelings aren't out of place.
I think this is a really good response. It's really easy to feel attached and then it hurts to see a girl interested in/doing anything with other guys, even if you don't really have the girl in question. Girls like to play around and it hurts. Better if they can hide it from you.
Also being stuck with secret info that you can't act on also hurts a lot. Will drive you nuts. Better to know no secrets, and stick to girls who like you enough to not hurt you (either by keeping their secrets secret, or by not doing things like that). Really girls have to learn this stuff, they don't realize how they are making guys feel--or they don't care that much, but they should learn to pretend to care out of courtesy.
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Ok first of all....Did you make your feelings known?? Up front?? At all?? Have you EVER had the talk with her like hey I feel this way towards you, do you feel the same? If not then you have NO reason.....and I mean ABSOLUTELY NO reason to feel like she betrayed you! I don't want you to think I am a dick for saying this, thats not my intention. Girls are so freaking different than men. They CAN and WILL put a man in the friend zone super fukin fast. It might hurt a little and don't feel betrayed, because odds are she had no idea you were into her, and in no way would feel bad if you fuked another chick.
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SOMEONE's going to have sex with her...might as well be you.
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Haha I fucking love you guys, seriously do. It's like I'm talking with my internet parents, cuz my parents don't really care nor could I tell them haha. Everything you guys have said I seriously appreciate it and just for the record, I plan to be her friend, just not really text her and kinda distance myself, just because I'm the person to get attached to the goldfish. I remember having my guinea pig die of cancer and like first grade and balled my eyes out  R.I.P. Rose <3 haha. And for the above poster, I hadn't told her, but she's damn well aware I know because her best friend tells her everything and I told her best friend. My own crafty elusive way of telling her, but being a bitch about it. But like I said guys I'm just here to write and say how I feel more than anything, this is just like the safest place on the nets for me to do it I feel.
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On November 17 2011 11:43 mptj wrote:Show nested quote +On November 17 2011 11:40 shawster wrote:
you're friend zoned blah blah blah you should've acted faster
theres no point in feeling bad
should've put it in her before some other guy could at the party
it's all about mindset. theres no reason to feel bad. dont fall into the trap. Haha, I'm a junior I'll find some slutty sophomore and put it in her this weekend ACHIEVEMENT
That oughtta be worth a whole new portrait.
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I can definitely understand where your coming from, its not easy but you will get over it, it sucks, always haha.
Its pretty cool to be able to share stuff on TL where you cant share it in real life.
good luck moving forward buddy, it will all work out for the best!
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That gut feeling is one of the worst feelings you can go through. After having a bunch of heartbreaks I learned to ask myself "Is this going to matter in 10 years?". Almost certainly it will not. Sometimes I have cut ties to girls that I feel so heartbroken about but that usually doesn't make sense. If you continue to be her friend you'll eventually sleep together if you just don't worry about it. Most of the people I've slept with have become friends or were only ever friends. You never know when you'll both be single at the same time and just need someone to hang out with. It's a lot easier to be friends if you're not single though. It's often too hard to be "cool" if you're thinking about sex all the time.
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wtf is V card? hahhahahahaha
dont be sad buddy,TL with you.
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On November 17 2011 13:11 cklrkzk wrote:
wtf is V card? hahhahahahaha
dont be sad buddy,TL with you.
She lost her virginity xD thus V - Card.
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This forum isn't THAT awesome. It's only awesome when someone posts girl blogs cuz those are the only thing worth reading.
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Yeah, just label her as a prostitute and move on
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The scenario sucks, I can be a jealous person, just blame It on nature, men need/want to have as many children as possible with their seed, hence when a woman of your choice potentially(the action of sex)has the child of another man it makes u angry.
She is no longer the white angel she once was, whether you like it or not, she is now and will continue to be a dirty slut - worthless to you and your endevours for love
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Virginity is over-rated. I don't know why people treat women's virginity as such a sacred thing...maybe old traditions/culture?
A woman does not lose her value just because she is no longer a virgin.
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On November 17 2011 14:15 kethers wrote:
Virginity is over-rated. I don't know why people treat women's virginity as such a sacred thing...maybe old traditions/culture?
A woman does not lose her value just because she is no longer a virgin.
you havnt seen memoirs of a geisha? Their value drops significantly once they are deflowered
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It's not that sharing your first time with someone is that great, it's more that it's an unknown so you can build it up to be anything. It's a little weird to have sex with someone when you don't know what you're doing, but then they have someone to compare you to. So he kinda maybe lost a chance at avoiding this, but really it's not something that needs to be avoided, everybody is going to face that in their life unless they only sleep with virgins...
I dealt with this as well. The first woman I slept with I ended up staying with her a long time, and we were both virgins. But eventually we broke up, she slept with other people, and that drove me nuts for a while. I mean, for so long I never had to even think about how I would compare to other people, but now I had to face reality that some people she likes better than me. Also after the break up I slept with other women who weren't virgins, so I had to face the risk of comparison, it felt like being a virgin again because I had to think about, hey what if I suck at this, what if they've had better, etc.?
But you know what, that's all just some stupid thoughts in your head and you can skip them, they go away instantly and don't matter, but there's a small, very small point where these thoughts present themself, and you can procrastinate facing these by having your first time with someone else's first time... but whatever, you don't need it. You didn't miss out dude, don't worry. Just have a lot of sex.
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Kinda like SC, first you have your placement, then you "get put into a league" but the good thing is, your mmr keeps increasing when you learn, practice get better, so eventually you'll get into higher and higher leagues. It's all good.
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It's all good now bro, should be easier for you to crush them guts. You should move in for the kill.
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On November 17 2011 16:08 ImDrizzt wrote:
Kinda like SC, first you have your placement, then you "get put into a league" but the good thing is, your mmr keeps increasing when you learn, practice get better, so eventually you'll get into higher and higher leagues. It's all good.
I lol'd
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She sounds like someone that wouldn't be a good partner, honestly. Be her best friend or whatever but just "fucking some dude" on a party doesn't sound like she's the one for a serious relationship right now.
And I think you're not either :3
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Third girl blog this morning oh man I'm off to a great day.
Basically, if you're not gunna break it, someone else is going to - it's a matter of time. On this particular girl, you missed your timing window (it certainly sounds like you had a good one) and now some other dude popped the cherry before you did. Oh well, if you really liked the girl you'd still go for her (in my honest opinion the 'V-card' shouldn't change her value to you, right?) and if you didn't, oh well, find another?
Although I do somewhat share your sentiments, long ago I used to put a girl on a pedestal and I was in for a huge disappointment after. One of those moments that everyone goes through at least once.
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On November 18 2011 23:00 OpticalShot wrote:
On this particular girl, you missed your timing window
Optical, I think he was actually attempting to employ counter timing here. While he missed the timing window, the resources he has banked should allow him to tech a bit farther and hit a stronger timing later on, by which time her defenses will not be adequate.
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Just be careful, most of them only interested in your headset anyway.
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On November 17 2011 12:10 mptj wrote:Haha I fucking love you guys, seriously do. It's like I'm talking with my internet parents, cuz my parents don't really care nor could I tell them haha. Everything you guys have said I seriously appreciate it and just for the record, I plan to be her friend, just not really text her and kinda distance myself, just because I'm the person to get attached to the goldfish. I remember having my guinea pig die of cancer and like first grade and balled my eyes out R.I.P. Rose <3 haha. And for the above poster, I hadn't told her, but she's damn well aware I know because her best friend tells her everything and I told her best friend. My own crafty elusive way of telling her, but being a bitch about it. But like I said guys I'm just here to write and say how I feel more than anything, this is just like the safest place on the nets for me to do it I feel.
its ok i had a pet shrimp once i ate all his friends and i cried when he was dead in his bowl of tap water the next day
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I know the feeling OP. It sucks. You'll move on though!
There is one positive to the situation: next time you like someone that much you'll ask them out! Worked for me, others, and it will for you!
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You should hit it off with her best friend. You get along and she tells u secrets
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On November 19 2011 05:37 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
You should hit it off with her best friend. You get along and she tells u secrets
I fully support this message. That is a brilliant idea.
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On November 19 2011 05:38 OpticalShot wrote:Show nested quote +On November 19 2011 05:37 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
You should hit it off with her best friend. You get along and she tells u secrets I fully support this message. That is a brilliant idea.
Like this you can lose your own V-card!
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EPT
