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Cunninglinguists

Blogs > Roffles
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Roffles *
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Pitcairn19291 Posts
October 10 2011 18:06 GMT
#1
I'm in some dire need for some help here. I'm looking for some cunning linguists to help me brainstorm ways in which I can express myself in a clear fashion during interviews and such. I'm just looking for some basic ideas such as what to avoid, any cliche shit that I should look out for, and how to phrase certain things so that it doesn't impact me negatively.

Any basic pointers and tips would be greatly appreciated. Just trying to get as many opinions as possible.

+ Show Spoiler +
Sorry about these titles


**
God Bless
Mogwai
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States13274 Posts
October 10 2011 18:10 GMT
#2
damnit, I was hoping this thread would be about these guys:

mogwaismusings.wordpress.com
Tatari
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States1179 Posts
October 10 2011 18:14 GMT
#3
Oh god... I read that as cunnilingus... X_X
A fed jungler is no longer a jungler, but a terrorist.
TiTanIum_
Profile Joined August 2011
Brazil1335 Posts
October 10 2011 18:15 GMT
#4
I was afraid when I read Cunninglinguists. Seriously afraid...
Spekulatius
Profile Joined January 2011
Germany2413 Posts
October 10 2011 18:23 GMT
#5
Couldn't resist clicking that blog in the sidebar in the middle of class although it made me sweat, anticipating NSFW content.

Always smile~
Dodgin
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Canada39254 Posts
October 10 2011 18:24 GMT
#6
Why do I keep clicking on these.
FinestHour
Profile Joined August 2010
United States18466 Posts
October 10 2011 18:29 GMT
#7
Wat is cunilingis
thug life.                                                       MVP/ex-
PassiveAce
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States18076 Posts
October 10 2011 18:30 GMT
#8
was expecting cunnin'linguists
Call me Marge Simpson cuz I love you homie
seRapH
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States9766 Posts
October 10 2011 18:30 GMT
#9
You could start by not doing what you did with the title ^^
boomer hands
Condor Hero
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States2931 Posts
October 10 2011 18:34 GMT
#10
what kind of job you looking for ?
i just went through a job search/interview process this past year.
Jibba
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States22883 Posts
October 10 2011 18:36 GMT
#11
Need more context, imo. What kind of interviews?
ModeratorNow I'm distant, dark in this anthrobeat
SiN]
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States540 Posts
October 10 2011 18:38 GMT
#12
On October 11 2011 03:10 Mogwai wrote:
damnit, I was hoping this thread would be about these guys:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3t3YAb0-Iwc


i thought it was about them too haha
ymir233
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States8275 Posts
October 10 2011 18:39 GMT
#13
I think what a lot of people dislike is repetition...it's like reading a book that uses one lame phrase 3 times within 8 sentences and you start becoming irritated by it. Try to be conscious of and avoid repetition in your speech unless you're doing it purposefully in a list.

As for speech clarity, pausing for about .5-3 seconds to gather your thoughts and then say something with an impact is MUCH MUCH better than putting your mouth on automatic and your brain on neutral.

And it's ok to say cliche shits if the alternative is just something weird/unbelievable/stupid - just say it in a different manner and be honest about it (AKA give it 'your' twist)...then it'll be fine.
Come motivate me to be cynical about animus at http://infinityandone.blogspot.com/ // Stork proxy gates are beautiful.
Roffles *
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Pitcairn19291 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-10 18:42:19
October 10 2011 18:39 GMT
#14
On October 11 2011 03:34 Condor Hero wrote:
what kind of job you looking for ?
i just went through a job search/interview process this past year.

Not quite sure yet honestly. I've got like 4-5 interviews lined up in all different fields and industries for the next week, so I'm kind of just trying to get a generic sense of what to do/what not to do/etc. General pointers that can work for any type of interview, which I can then use to divulge into field-based specifics.

Another question I have is what do I do if the interviewer asks me to describe a situation I've never encountered. Do I just tell them I've never been in that situation or should I attempt to make up something on the fly?
God Bless
Mr. Wiggles
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Canada5894 Posts
October 10 2011 18:47 GMT
#15
On October 11 2011 03:14 Tatari wrote:
Oh god... I read that as cunnilingus... X_X

I did too.

First the sucking dick blog, and now this!!! O.o

Tip 1: Avoid anything that sounds sexually suggestive, or like innuendo.
you gotta dance
mucker
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States1120 Posts
October 10 2011 18:48 GMT
#16
On October 11 2011 03:39 Roffles wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 11 2011 03:34 Condor Hero wrote:
what kind of job you looking for ?
i just went through a job search/interview process this past year.


Another question I have is what do I do if the interviewer asks me to describe a situation I've never encountered. Do I just tell them I've never been in that situation or should I attempt to make up something on the fly?


You say you've never been in that situation but then describe a different situation in which you solved a problem you hadn't encountered before.
It's supposed to be automatic but actually you have to press this button.
darklordjac
Profile Joined July 2010
Canada2231 Posts
October 10 2011 18:52 GMT
#17
On October 11 2011 03:10 Mogwai wrote:
damnit, I was hoping this thread would be about these guys:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3t3YAb0-Iwc


So was I, so was I... sigh whatever
Zergneedsfood
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States10671 Posts
October 10 2011 18:55 GMT
#18
Separating the words might've helped remove some of the confusion.

+ Show Spoiler +
Though I'm pretty sure that wasn't your intention.
/人◕ ‿‿ ◕人\ Make a contract with me and join TLADT | Onodera isn't actually a girl, she's just a doormat you walk over to get to the girl. - Numy 2015
HardMacro
Profile Blog Joined September 2011
Canada361 Posts
October 10 2011 18:56 GMT
#19
Taking a leaf out of your book when naming my future blogs to attract views
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ saving this here because I use it, don't know how to make it, and don't know it's name
eXigent.
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Canada2419 Posts
October 10 2011 19:01 GMT
#20
On October 11 2011 03:39 Roffles wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 11 2011 03:34 Condor Hero wrote:
what kind of job you looking for ?
i just went through a job search/interview process this past year.

Not quite sure yet honestly. I've got like 4-5 interviews lined up in all different fields and industries for the next week, so I'm kind of just trying to get a generic sense of what to do/what not to do/etc. General pointers that can work for any type of interview, which I can then use to divulge into field-based specifics.

Another question I have is what do I do if the interviewer asks me to describe a situation I've never encountered. Do I just tell them I've never been in that situation or should I attempt to make up something on the fly?


You could open your response with "Had I been in this situation, I would have...." Or "Had this situation ever happened to me, I would have", or "Although I have never experienced such a situation, hypothetically I would..." ETC.
Condor Hero
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States2931 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-10 19:10:13
October 10 2011 19:09 GMT
#21
On October 11 2011 03:39 Roffles wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 11 2011 03:34 Condor Hero wrote:
what kind of job you looking for ?
i just went through a job search/interview process this past year.

Not quite sure yet honestly. I've got like 4-5 interviews lined up in all different fields and industries for the next week, so I'm kind of just trying to get a generic sense of what to do/what not to do/etc. General pointers that can work for any type of interview, which I can then use to divulge into field-based specifics.

Another question I have is what do I do if the interviewer asks me to describe a situation I've never encountered. Do I just tell them I've never been in that situation or should I attempt to make up something on the fly?

You kind of have to make your own judgments when they ask questions like that (in my opinion, interviewers who follow that format are retarded). Generally, its better to provide an answer, even if you have to make it up, than to say it never happened to you. Remember, when they ask questions like that they are trying to get to know your character better, and if you don't give an answer then you're not telling them anything.

You should also make a point of emphasizing how hard it to for them to make good judgments about who to hire based off an hour or two of questioning. Mention how everyone they've met probably has said that they are hard working, career focused, outgoing (everything good basically) but you are different because __________.

For me personally, I mentioned how my parents were immigrants to the US and how hard they worked to provide me better opportunities has influenced me to work hard in my life etc.
MisterFred
Profile Joined October 2010
United States2033 Posts
October 10 2011 19:11 GMT
#22
Speak slowly, & with authority (not quiet, but not trying to blow their ears out). Make sense. Have positive body language. that's about it. You don't want to rush through responses as if you only have limited time to say everything (or their time is far more important than yours).

It helps if you remind yourself why it would be a really good idea for them to hire you and really internalize that.
"The victor? Not the highest scoring, nor the best strategist, nor the best tactitian. The victor was he that was closest to the Tao of FFA." -.Praetor
Hjertify
Profile Joined April 2010
Sweden70 Posts
October 10 2011 19:19 GMT
#23
lol i tougth it was about the band first, listening to there latest album rigth now.
...
marttorn
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Norway5211 Posts
October 10 2011 19:37 GMT
#24
Goddamnit Roffles, not again...

memes are a dish best served dank
Roffles *
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Pitcairn19291 Posts
October 10 2011 19:45 GMT
#25
What, you don't like my improperly titled blogs?


God Bless
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24701 Posts
October 10 2011 20:04 GMT
#26
Make sure you use mouthwash (applies to both).
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
exShikari
Profile Joined December 2010
Australia237 Posts
October 10 2011 20:10 GMT
#27
What exactly are you needing help for? Context is everything.

On October 11 2011 03:29 FinestHour wrote:
Wat is cunilingis

Oral sex performed on a female. Delicious :D
It is, in the end, whatever the Hell I want it to be, And when I'm through with it, it's gonna blow a hole, This wide, straight through the worlds own idea of itself. They're throwing bottles at your house. Come on, lets go break their arms.
Mothra
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States1448 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-10 21:05:30
October 10 2011 21:04 GMT
#28
Just print out the url to your teamliquid blog and hand it to them. Automatic.
jazzyjazz
Profile Joined October 2010
941 Posts
October 10 2011 21:38 GMT
#29
Have you ever heard of the STAR approach when answering behavioral/situation questions? I'm sure you can find a ton of stuff on the internet about it, but here's the jist of it when they ask you something like "tell me about a time where you demonstrated leadership blah blah blah"

S - situation: just a bit of background of the operating environment and what was going on. eg. you worked at a small tech company and you had to work on some project

T - task: what you had to do specifically, what was the goal? eg. your boss gave you a project to test out a new product and write a report to him about the findings

A - action: what you actually did to accomplish the task. be specific here and be sure to tie in the overall trait they want you to talk about (eg. leadership)

R - result: what was the outcome from your action? list your accomplishments, swing your dick out here that's what they want. be quantifiable. eg. finished project 2 weeks ahead of time and discovered 3 faults regarding product previously undiscovered. MAKE SURE to tie in HOW your actions lead to this result.

Remember not to talk too much about the situation and task as a lot of people do that. The action and result part is usually the most important. And be quantifiable with your result, eg. increased sales by $50,000.

Good luck, recruitment is tough.
Eat emmmmmmmmmm
MoonBear
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Straight outta Johto18973 Posts
October 10 2011 21:53 GMT
#30
Remember that for the most part, they want to see if you're someone they're happy to work with. Since you already have an interview, you've already shown you have at least the minimum technical skills they need unless their HR Department isn't screening properly. Go in there with the view of showing you're someone the other guy would be happy to have to sit next to and work with every day. Show you can clearly get to the point and give them what is necessary.

Also, showing you can uphold commitments and promises is important too.

Good luck~!
ModeratorA dream. Do you have one that has cursed you like that? Or maybe... a wish?
HardMacro
Profile Blog Joined September 2011
Canada361 Posts
October 11 2011 01:10 GMT
#31
It's cliché but true, first impressions are everything. If they don't like you in the first 15 seconds, you might as well punch them in the face and leave.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ saving this here because I use it, don't know how to make it, and don't know it's name
John Madden
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
American Samoa894 Posts
October 11 2011 01:22 GMT
#32
I came
FOOTBALL
BLinD-RawR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
ALLEYCAT BLUES50328 Posts
October 11 2011 03:28 GMT
#33
On October 11 2011 10:22 John Madden wrote:
I came

Roffle!

I don't know whats funnier,this thread title or the fact that the sucking dick blog has 69 replies...wait..MIND BLOWN!!!

+ Show Spoiler +
what an unintentional troll.
Brood War EICWoo Jung Ho, never forget.| Twitter: @BLinDRawR
TL+ Member
Rekrul
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
Korea (South)17174 Posts
October 11 2011 03:35 GMT
#34
Tell some things you want to say/express and then we can help you.
why so 진지해?
Azera
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
3800 Posts
October 11 2011 03:53 GMT
#35
Man I love these titles.
Check out some great music made by TLers - http://bit.ly/QXYhdb , by intrigue. http://bit.ly/RTjpOR , by ohsea.toc.
shawster
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Canada2485 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-11 03:58:21
October 11 2011 03:58 GMT
#36
On October 11 2011 03:10 Mogwai wrote:
damnit, I was hoping this thread would be about these guys:

+ Show Spoiler +
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3t3YAb0-Iwc




such a good song
Azzur
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Australia6259 Posts
October 11 2011 04:07 GMT
#37
ROFL, I wonder how many got lured into this thread!
Nallen
Profile Joined September 2011
United Kingdom134 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-11 15:30:33
October 11 2011 15:20 GMT
#38
How old are you and is this your first job?

I would say never bullshit, we can see straight through it and as soon as you walk out the door we'll say 'what the fuck was he on about?' and move along. If you are presented with something you've not done or experienced it's fine to say that, but try and make an intelligent comment on it (don't say 'I dunno' or something just as useless).

I would say the most important thing you can do was mentioned last page; take a moment and think about your responses. That doesn't mean sit like a lemon for two minutes in silence while you ponder it just means try and end ensure you're not going to realise halfway in to a monologue you have no idea what your point was. If you need to stall for a second repeat the question back.

Don't ramble, make the salient points you want to make and back them up with an example whenever you can. The advice above about action and outcome was good.

Try and think about slowing yourself down, you will be rushing due to the nerves. Slowing down will allow you to consider questions and respond thoughtfully and intelligently and help the interviewer to make his or her notes and fully understand you.

Prepare a few solid questions about the company or role you are applying for. Try to find out a little more about the company than what is written on the first paragraph of their website (we have to listen to this from pretty much everyone, if you can avoid the same lines as everyone else you will help yourself no end). Good questions show you've thought about what you are interviewing for before you arrived.

Oh and clichés to avoid - the greatest has to be "My weakness is that I can be a perfectionist" or anything to that effect. Give that question thought, answering it well is an art.

Anyway I hope that helps. Got me away from this pile of CVs for a bit

Edit: For the love of god be ten minutes early and smartly dressed. If you're not sure where you're going go the day before and check.
mizU
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States12125 Posts
October 11 2011 15:43 GMT
#39
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

seriously roffles.

Seriously.
if happy ever afters did exist <3 @watamizu_
turdburgler
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
England6749 Posts
October 11 2011 18:07 GMT
#40
On October 11 2011 03:14 Tatari wrote:
Oh god... I read that as cunnilingus... X_X


same
Wrongspeedy
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States1655 Posts
October 11 2011 18:55 GMT
#41
Try not to get tongue-tied.
It is better to be a human dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied than a fool satisfied.- John Stuart Mill
Kamille
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Monaco1035 Posts
October 11 2011 20:59 GMT
#42
Not enough hate. You need to hate more.
Priphea
fusefuse
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Estonia4644 Posts
October 11 2011 21:27 GMT
#43
haha you're doing it right Roffles

"my blog titles bring all the boys to the yard
and their advice
is better than yours

I can teach you,
but i have to [image loading]"
Liquipedia@jkursk
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