Barely a day passed and here comes another update. After doing the first commentary, I actually felt so good. You see, talking and thinking about my own game without just discarding it with my typical 'you suck', trying to analyze the game instead made the loss feel much less frustrating and painful. So, Loop encouraged me to play some ladder matches, which I did.
Brief summary of the games
Game 1
PvP - Blistering Sands / Victory
First game was PvP on Blistering Sands. Oh, I 'love' PvP. Expected something cheesy and I was actually right. I went to scout them to see a forge coming up. My 'smells like cheese' alert went on high rate, me going back to my base to check for any Pylons or cannons. Nothing. Not even a probe. The guy didn't scout. Saw cannons coming down in his base. That usually means something weird like void-ray rush or mass voids. Right... went to get mass Stalkers, added some more units, got an observer just in case, sending it to scout my opponent's base. Two stargates were going up. My estimation of void-rays was correct. Went and knocked on their backdoor. Killed his stuff. Won the game. Felt great.
Game 2
PvP - Steppes of War / Loss
I took short break between the games, but soon after I hit that dreadful 'Find match' again, to roll another PvP on Steppes of War. Instant 'Bohooo' went down in my mind. 'Where's some PvZ? Come on, Blizzard. Oh well, maybe next time', I thought and went on in the game. The guy went for something weird, having early chargelots and Warp Prism warping stuff close to my base. I failed/forgot scouting this game. Lost my army, lost the game.
Not letting that to shaken me up too much, I went on.
Game 3
PvT - Metalopolis / Loss
PvT on Metalopolis. Why not PvZ again? I've been itching for some PvZ, because I was practicing that matchup the most lately. Oh well, I'm such lucky person, aint'I? PvT is my worst matchup, not confident in it at all. That game turned out to be quite long, around 30 mins. Quite interesting one, the most enjoyable one as well as educative and showing me what mistakes I do on recurring basis. This game actually made me to do more indepth analysis/commentary again.
PvT on Metalopolis, commentary & self-analysis, Part 1
PvT on Metalopolis, commentary & self-analysis, Part 2
I played with the mic adjustment a bit, but it seems it still needs some tweaks, as this time my voice came out somewhat less aloud and at certain parts of the commentary, it blends into sounds of the game... although, I put more effort into actual analysis of the game, added that at the end of the game as well, with what I could've improve.
Critical areas in need of improvement
Army management/movement/micro
This is sore point for me. I end up dividing my army, having it killed. I A-move the army and sometimes the units just hit stuff I don't need them to hit, instead of hitting actual threat. It equals nearly as if I just divided the firepower and thus, making me to lose a lot of units, completelly unnecessary.
Another thing is, I need to be active with my army. To move it around, look for hidden expos, harrass. I am very passive in my games, being afraid to leave my base. I've been working on fixing that by having scouts either by Xel'Naga towers or at least an obs sitting in the front of my opponent's base, to see if something is coming, although, I still forget to watch the minimap a lot.
Late game/macro
It seems I'm able to macro at decent level considering I am mere Bronze as long as I sit on just two bases. Once the game progresses and more stuff happens, I expand, I'm unable to keep up and end up clueless in my games. As I pointed out in my commentary, I'm torn inbetween of learning it wrong way and make more production structures than I can actively produce from with optimal macro and then, as my macro improves, re-learn it the proper way or just try to keep my money low with the optimal setup. I also shouldn't be afraid to tech to other tech paths.. like HT's and Stargates. Basically never used those...
Multitasking
Another huge sore point. The moment battle happens and I have to babysit my army, my minerals skyrocket. I do try to keep at least probe production up, but when i try to say, warp more gateway units, it ends up in mess, often adding the warpgates into my army control group. This is so annoying, because when I hit my control group with army, it then centers on the warpgates. My macro also goes on holidays if I move around with my army and focus on it too much. I'm unable to keep up with the game's pace, mainly in late game.
Overall conclusion
It seems that the mechanics are still my downfall, although I feel like I improved on macro a bit, as I'm able to spend my stuff, pump up units and all that just fine, as long as I sit on just two bases. But, two bases are not enough sometimes.
Bonus:
Game 4
PvT - Blistering Sands / Victory
Like I mentioned, I felt quite good after all the self-analysis despite of losing two games out of three, so I decided to play one more game before bed-time. (It was around 5 am). I put an emphasis on scouting, took both Xel'Naga Towers to have good overview of the map. That helped, the guy tried to throw a drop into my mineral line. Well, he wanted, but I killed his stuff before he got to it. I threw down an expo and went to kill him. Could've knock on his backdoor, but I kind of forgot about that in this game. Either way, I killed his army, won the game. Felt great.
I'm trying hard to find ways for fixing my negative/ self-loathing mindset and it seems my first taken baby steps are helping me already. Wish me luck guys and girls, this path is far from finished!