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fucking beans

Blogs > AcrossFiveJulys
Post a Reply
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AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
July 14 2010 23:38 GMT
#1
i was hungry. you know what that means: open up a can of beans, throw that shit in the microwave, woolf that shit down, then get back to stomping newbs in sc2.

instead, the fucking can sprayed bean sauce all over the kitchen and on my cj entus shirt (FUUUU). i shrugged it off and kept opening the can.

but the beans were not done pulling shenanigans. a small piece of the lid remained attached, so i pushed it down with my thump like i always do when it happens. then the lid fucking bent and sliced the pad of my thumb like a cheesy ass DT. so here i am typing with one hand. hope i domt need stiches. trust me, you dont want a pic.

****
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24753 Posts
July 14 2010 23:39 GMT
#2
Cans can be vicious as hell. I feel for you man. Clean it good! Hopefully you can let someone take a look at it.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
BuGzlToOnl
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
United States5918 Posts
July 14 2010 23:39 GMT
#3
Did you really put a metal can in the microwave?
If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.
Mickey
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United States2606 Posts
July 14 2010 23:40 GMT
#4
That's why I'm always careful when opening cans. Those edges can fuck you up.
Disregard
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
China10252 Posts
July 14 2010 23:40 GMT
#5
On July 15 2010 08:39 BuGzlToOnl wrote:
Did you really put a metal can in the microwave?


Same here.
"If I had to take a drug in order to be free, I'm screwed. Freedom exists in the mind, otherwise it doesn't exist."
FragKrag
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States11556 Posts
July 14 2010 23:40 GMT
#6
On July 15 2010 08:39 BuGzlToOnl wrote:
Did you really put a metal can in the microwave?


this

what were you thinking
*TL CJ Entusman #40* "like scissors does anything to paper except MAKE IT MORE NUMEROUS" -paper
DeathByMonkeys
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States742 Posts
July 14 2010 23:42 GMT
#7
On July 15 2010 08:38 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
i was hungry. you know what that means: open up a can of beans, throw that shit in the microwave, woolf that shit down, then get back to stomping newbs in sc2.

instead, the fucking can sprayed bean sauce all over the kitchen and on my cj entus shirt (FUUUU). i shrugged it off and kept opening the can.

but the beans were not done pulling shenanigans. a small piece of the lid remained attached, so i pushed it down with my thump like i always do when it happens. then the lid fucking bent and sliced the pad of my thumb like a cheesy ass DT. so here i am typing with one hand. hope i domt need stiches. trust me, you dont want a pic.


Ahahahaha, 5/5.

As for the thumb, just apply pressure 'till it stops bleeding then put some neosporin on it followed by and band-aid. But yeah if it's too bad you might want to consider stitches.
HeadhunteR
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Argentina1258 Posts
July 14 2010 23:43 GMT
#8
On July 15 2010 08:40 FragKrag wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 15 2010 08:39 BuGzlToOnl wrote:
Did you really put a metal can in the microwave?


this

what were you thinking



this cant be true...... when has that ever worked well?
in The Kong line forever
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
July 14 2010 23:43 GMT
#9
nono i was putting the beans into a bowl first

this is many bleeds
zergnewb
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States816 Posts
July 14 2010 23:47 GMT
#10
Oh jeez that has to suck. Maybe karma at work?
Welcome to the Durst-Zone
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
July 14 2010 23:48 GMT
#11
i forgot to add that i immediately before this happened, i cheesed and won 3 TvT in a row with mass marine/maruader rush
Polar_Nada
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States1548 Posts
July 14 2010 23:49 GMT
#12
On July 15 2010 08:48 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
i forgot to add that i immediately before this happened, i cheesed and won 3 TvT in a row with mass marine/maruader rush

heh one handed?
[ReD]NaDa and fnaticMSI.SEn fighting~! ::POlar @ UC Irvine::
Jayme
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
United States5866 Posts
July 14 2010 23:51 GMT
#13
On July 15 2010 08:49 Polar_Nada wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 15 2010 08:48 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
i forgot to add that i immediately before this happened, i cheesed and won 3 TvT in a row with mass marine/maruader rush

heh one handed?


Note the immediately before part of his sentence....
Python is garbage, number 1 advocate of getting rid of it.
Disregard
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
China10252 Posts
July 14 2010 23:53 GMT
#14
This is why I use a spoon and leave a small section of the can lid attached. Of course a can-opener is a standard house utensil.
"If I had to take a drug in order to be free, I'm screwed. Freedom exists in the mind, otherwise it doesn't exist."
tru_power22
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada385 Posts
July 15 2010 00:06 GMT
#15
FUCKING BEANS!!!

[image loading]

Sucks man, try to be more careful next time
Smoke Errday!
shieldbreak
Profile Joined February 2010
United States406 Posts
July 15 2010 00:10 GMT
#16
Oh dude that sucks...Wha...Wait. You threw a metal can in the microwave?
Many a sleepless nights were spent doing absolutely nothing.
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24753 Posts
July 15 2010 00:11 GMT
#17
On July 15 2010 09:10 shieldbreak wrote:
Oh dude that sucks...Wha...Wait. You threw a metal can in the microwave?

If you read the thread carefully (with any effort whatsoever) you'll see that he cut his finger BEFORE putting the can in the microwave. The OP was a bit unclear.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
mucker
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States1120 Posts
July 15 2010 00:14 GMT
#18
Pic of the demon can at least, jeez
It's supposed to be automatic but actually you have to press this button.
Tenryu
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States565 Posts
July 15 2010 00:16 GMT
#19
On July 15 2010 09:06 tru_power22 wrote:
FUCKING BEANS!!!

[image loading]

Sucks man, try to be more careful next time


OOOH i love doing that. Gives me a hard on everytime.
http://myanimelist.net/profile/Understar
Rinrun
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada3509 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-15 00:35:17
July 15 2010 00:34 GMT
#20
I feel for ya, except my experience with a can splitting my hand open was cause I was hulking a can... but still. Your situation is worse though... THE CJ ENTUS SHIRT - Oh the humaity... *faints with handkerchief in hand*
MBC/Liquid/TSM always.
AcrossFiveJulys
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
United States3612 Posts
July 15 2010 00:36 GMT
#21
On July 15 2010 09:14 mucker wrote:
Pic of the demon can at least, jeez


it's in the trash. i ate the beans a few minutes ago.

afj > beans
Subversion
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
South Africa3627 Posts
July 15 2010 00:40 GMT
#22
meh. beans are crap anyway.

ramen is the instant meal of choice
san-tokie
Profile Joined May 2007
Korea (South)185 Posts
July 15 2010 00:43 GMT
#23
I have a similar experience with opening ramen and unknowing my own strength the bag exploded and noodles went everywhere
SilentCrono
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States1420 Posts
July 15 2010 00:43 GMT
#24
that is why i am careful with those fucking cans
♞ Your soul will forever be lost in the void of a horse. ♞
Cow
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada1104 Posts
July 15 2010 00:59 GMT
#25
Same thing happened to my mom just under a year ago. Dad took her to emergency, while I stayed home to watch younger siblings. There was blood splattered all over the wall, it was pretty freaky. Needless to say, I've been very careful about opening cans now.
Also I hope that stain comes off ;x
R.I.P. Nujabes ♫
Jugan
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States1566 Posts
July 15 2010 01:23 GMT
#26
On July 15 2010 09:36 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 15 2010 09:14 mucker wrote:
Pic of the demon can at least, jeez


it's in the trash. i ate the beans a few minutes ago.

afj > beans


at least you got double revenge on it.
Even a Savior couldn't fix all problems. www.twitch.tv/xJugan
Sinensis
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States2513 Posts
July 15 2010 01:30 GMT
#27
I was expecting this thread to be about drugs. I've gored myself on my share of cans too.
Trezeguet
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States2656 Posts
July 15 2010 01:32 GMT
#28
all right! Fuck beans, hell yeah!~
Durak
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
Canada3685 Posts
July 15 2010 01:32 GMT
#29
I've got this sick can-opener that cuts the side of the lid so that the lid and can aren't sharp at all. Genius invention.
Divinek
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
Canada4045 Posts
July 15 2010 01:41 GMT
#30
hopefully you learned how to open a can now
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
Oh goodness me, FOX tv where do you get your sight? Can't you keep track, the puck is black. That's why the ice is white.
Mykill
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
Canada3402 Posts
July 15 2010 01:46 GMT
#31
hahah that sucks!
don't eat beans! try microwave pasta. much safer!
[~~The Impossible Leads To Invention~~] CJ Entusman #52 The problem with internet quotations is that they are hard to verify -Abraham Lincoln c.1863
Wr3k
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Canada2533 Posts
July 15 2010 02:06 GMT
#32
I'm glad that you shared because I'm sure we all enjoy laughing at you very much.

5/5
gaizka
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
United States991 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-15 02:16:45
July 15 2010 02:16 GMT
#33
Hope you can clean you shirt.

On July 15 2010 09:14 mucker wrote:
Pic of the demon can at least, jeez


Please.

edit: aw, I saw your response
Jerubaal
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States7684 Posts
July 15 2010 02:17 GMT
#34
I guess you could say this Jack...

just got his beans stalked....

YEEAAAHHH!!!!
I'm not stupid, a marauder just shot my brain.
pokeyAA
Profile Blog Joined February 2004
United States936 Posts
July 15 2010 03:14 GMT
#35
On July 15 2010 09:40 Subversion wrote:
meh. beans are crap anyway.

ramen is the instant meal of choice


I would agree, but beans are probably a lot better for you, and it fills you up fast.
Empyrean
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
17047 Posts
July 15 2010 03:16 GMT
#36
On July 15 2010 12:14 pokeyAA wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 15 2010 09:40 Subversion wrote:
meh. beans are crap anyway.

ramen is the instant meal of choice


I would agree, but beans are probably a lot better for you, and it fills you up fast.


Beans are a great source of protein, some vitamins/minerals, and also a great source of fiber. They help you feel much fuller, and are very cheap and easy to prepare. You can also make very good meals with beans that taste great.

Ramen is super high in sodium and saturated fats (have you ever wondered how they get Ramen into those brick shapes? Massively fried.), and isn't as versatile as beans. It's also actually more expensive compared to buying beans in bulk.
Moderator
Spenguin
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Australia3316 Posts
July 15 2010 03:32 GMT
#37
What is wrong with you people, everyone should be asking for updates on the CJ shirt goddammit!
< TeamLiquid CJ Entusman #46 > I came for the Brood War, I stayed for the people.
a176
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada6688 Posts
July 15 2010 05:46 GMT
#38
On July 15 2010 10:32 Durak wrote:
I've got this sick can-opener that cuts the side of the lid so that the lid and can aren't sharp at all. Genius invention.


me too man. mine also has a freakin' tweezer-like grip thing on it to grab the metal lid - no fingers involved at all.
starleague forever
AppleTart
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States1261 Posts
July 15 2010 05:54 GMT
#39
beans beans they're good for the heart
the more you eat the more you fart
the more you fart the better you feel
so eat beans with every meal!
always tired -_-
Bub
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States3518 Posts
July 15 2010 08:24 GMT
#40
I like beans. lots of em. I don't like a crowd so beans is my good friend.......
XK ßubonic
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