Before we get started with the song I'd like to say that this is in no way a shameless self promotion blog. What I'd like to hear is some constructive criticism on my band's song. We are currently recording new material and I'd like some opinions on where you think we should go with our musical direction. So here is an older song to showcase what kind of a sound we portray.

http://nsdwhoa.bandcamp.com/track/27

Now if you don't care for screaming in music please listen passed the 2 minute mark as this song has a lot of non-screaming parts as well. I know an 11 minute song is long but you really need to hear the whole thing to get the feel for what we are portraying.

ZZangDreamjOy

Canada959 Posts

July 06 2010 03:07 GMT

You sound like a less heavy/less spastic Between the Buried and Me, or a calmer Circle takes the Square. I can see where your going for, but a lot of the parts in your song just don't segway into eachother correctly. A lot of times during the song I was wondering why you would put certain things where they are, because they just don't fit. lol.

It has promise, but it sounds like so many other bands out there.

Goatlust

Australia131 Posts

July 06 2010 03:34 GMT

Abysmal. Get into metal instead.

ieatkids5

United States4628 Posts

July 06 2010 03:36 GMT

i listened to about the 7 minute mark. some parts of the song seemed repetitive (around 6:20 if i remember correctly), and i think the bass could've done something.... different throughout the song instead of just playing something similar throughout the song.

that's just some stuff i tried to come up with that's constructive. this isn't my type of music, but you can't make music that appeals to everyone. if a musician thinks his music sounds great, by all means make more.

vanskater

United States146 Posts

July 06 2010 03:38 GMT

Ryan hardwick sounds like a girl trying to hard to be a boy.

and as with most bands, the music ant bad (bass vol needs to be a little lower) its thats it hard to get enjoy the music with voice in the back ground.

kidcrash

United States626 Posts

July 06 2010 03:46 GMT

On July 06 2010 12:38 vanskater wrote:
Ryan hardwick sounds like a girl trying to hard to be a boy.

and as with most bands, the music ant bad (bass vol needs to be a little lower) its thats it hard to get enjoy the music with voice in the back ground.

LoL the singer gets that comment all the time but I never get sick of hearing it because it's funny to me.

kidcrash

United States626 Posts

July 06 2010 03:51 GMT

On July 06 2010 12:36 ieatkids5 wrote:
i listened to about the 7 minute mark. some parts of the song seemed repetitive (around 6:20 if i remember correctly), and i think the bass could've done something.... different throughout the song instead of just playing something similar throughout the song.

that's just some stuff i tried to come up with that's constructive. this isn't my type of music, but you can't make music that appeals to everyone. if a musician thinks his music sounds great, by all means make more.

This actually is very helpful since I am the bass player, thanks for the input.

Turbovolver

Australia2454 Posts

July 06 2010 04:09 GMT

ROFL this isn't going to be the music for a guy with username "Goatlust" XD

I don't agree with ZZangDreamjOy that this sounds like many other bands. It's too busy doing many different things to just be written off like that (which happened to be what the rest of his post said, heh).

The first 55 seconds set a tone that I don't really dig. The screaming is fine, but the music under it sounds almost like some dancish indie band. Maybe some people like that combination but I am definitely not one of them - I see screamo-type music as using the screams simply as an extra instrument that is primarily rhythmical and compliments the beautiful guitar work and complex drumming underneath.

This musical trend continues in the next section, though there's a lot less screaming there. The vocals are pretty, but they are combined with music that feels like it's trying to be more "cool" than pretty. It does goes into a kind of psychadelic breakdown that's pretty nice.

The guitar that comes in at (2:36) is more the kind of stuff I like, a spaced out emo/screamo and I feel the tone of the vocals and music fit together nicely. There's some building in the drums to stop the section from getting repetitive too, which is good.

What comes in at about (4:00) sounds a bit like a new song. I'm guessing because it goes from pretty + clean vocals to pretty + clean vocals but with a different guitar part. This section is quite extended out, it sounds like it could be a part of the <typical long and wandering album closer> of any band in this sort of genre.

We go back to a sort of indie cool stuff at 7:00-8:00. It vaguely reminded me of Tubelord. Again, not really my thing.

8:00-9:00 Don't know what to say here. Didn't care for it so much, to be blunt. I think part of it was the effect on the spoken word stuff not really gelling with me.

9:00-close This sounds like it could join up with the stuff from 4:00-7:00. It feels like it's using the same type of scale (keyboard giving an almost Egyptian feel) and songwriting approach. And as it gets deeper into this part the drumming really accentuates the rhythm (nice!) and the keyboard part from the beginning comes back in. It feels like it works better here. Maybe because I'm a sucker for the drumming and 7/4 parts that led into it.

A song that was just 4:00-7:00 joined up somehow with 9:00-11:22 would have been pretty awesome, I think. Then another song built around what was happening at 2:36-3:43 could be very good. I mean, I'm basically just picking out the parts of it that fit my tastes and saying those should make up the entirety of your songs, which feels kinda dumb, but that's my honest opinion so there it is.

Also check out the Saltwater EP from Pianos Become The Teeth if you haven't. That's keyboard+screamo stuff so it might be interesting to listen to for ideas. I'm not really saying it's particularly good, but eh.

kidcrash

United States626 Posts

July 06 2010 04:41 GMT

On July 06 2010 13:09 Turbovolver wrote:
ROFL this isn't going to be the music for a guy with username "Goatlust" XD

I don't agree with ZZangDreamjOy that this sounds like many other bands. It's too busy doing many different things to just be written off like that (which happened to be what the rest of his post said, heh).

The first 55 seconds set a tone that I don't really dig. The screaming is fine, but the music under it sounds almost like some dancish indie band. Maybe some people like that combination but I am definitely not one of them - I see screamo-type music as using the screams simply as an extra instrument that is primarily rhythmical and compliments the beautiful guitar work and complex drumming underneath.

This musical trend continues in the next section, though there's a lot less screaming there. The vocals are pretty, but they are combined with music that feels like it's trying to be more "cool" than pretty. It does goes into a kind of psychadelic breakdown that's pretty nice.

The guitar that comes in at (2:36) is more the kind of stuff I like, a spaced out emo/screamo and I feel the tone of the vocals and music fit together nicely. There's some building in the drums to stop the section from getting repetitive too, which is good.

What comes in at about (4:00) sounds a bit like a new song. I'm guessing because it goes from pretty + clean vocals to pretty + clean vocals but with a different guitar part. This section is quite extended out, it sounds like it could be a part of the <typical long and wandering album closer> of any band in this sort of genre.

We go back to a sort of indie cool stuff at 7:00-8:00. It vaguely reminded me of Tubelord. Again, not really my thing.

8:00-9:00 Don't know what to say here. Didn't care for it so much, to be blunt. I think part of it was the effect on the spoken word stuff not really gelling with me.

9:00-close This sounds like it could join up with the stuff from 4:00-7:00. It feels like it's using the same type of scale (keyboard giving an almost Egyptian feel) and songwriting approach. And as it gets deeper into this part the drumming really accentuates the rhythm (nice!) and the keyboard part from the beginning comes back in. It feels like it works better here. Maybe because I'm a sucker for the drumming and 7/4 parts that led into it.

A song that was just 4:00-7:00 joined up somehow with 9:00-11:22 would have been pretty awesome, I think. Then another song built around what was happening at 2:36-3:43 could be very good. I mean, I'm basically just picking out the parts of it that fit my tastes and saying those should make up the entirety of your songs, which feels kinda dumb, but that's my honest opinion so there it is.

Also check out the Saltwater EP from Pianos Become The Teeth if you haven't. That's keyboard+screamo stuff so it might be interesting to listen to for ideas. I'm not really saying it's particularly good, but eh.

Wonderfully insightful advice, thank you taking the time to listen to the whole song and give your opinion. Immensely appreciated!

Bosu

United States3247 Posts

July 06 2010 06:49 GMT

#10

I hate the screaming. I guess I just don't get it though. Why do people like that shit?

Umbrella

Taiwan936 Posts

July 06 2010 07:13 GMT

#11

I liked your song. Unfortunately, I don't know how to give constructive criticism for music, hehe. I guess the bass at 7:00-8:00 was a little jarring?

By the way, is your ID a reference to the band, Kidcrash?

kidcrash

United States626 Posts

July 06 2010 08:26 GMT

#12

On July 06 2010 16:13 Umbrella wrote:
I liked your song. Unfortunately, I don't know how to give constructive criticism for music, hehe. I guess the bass at 7:00-8:00 was a little jarring?

By the way, is your ID a reference to the band, Kidcrash?

Yeah it refers to the band. Definitely an awesome band, had the pleasure of playing with them and partying with them a few times.

virpi

Germany3599 Posts

July 06 2010 14:33 GMT

#13

okay, i will write while i'm listening to the song.

beginning: VERY strange. i like the screaming...the first melodic part is cool, but i think it could be better if you had put more emphasis on the vocal line - sounds quite random to me...erm, you like the mars volta, don't you? reminds me of them quite a bit.
so far so good, now it starts to get a litte boring, especially the production can't keep up with the song.
4:30. i like the guitar there, it opens up a lot of space, but still the vocals can't really fill it. i start to hate the ride cymbal, your drummer needs to follow the music with his cymbals. a 4/4 ride rhythm does destroy the atmosphere.
6:20. chill-out zone reached. quite expectable, but cool. it REALLY sounds like the mars volta now. (cicatriz esp)
7:05. good breakdown. the singer needs some training, though. with a little bit more power in his voice, he could do soo much more.
8:00. sample joins the party. if i was the songwriter here, i would definitely start to build up a gigantic wall of sound...culminating in a break.
okay, the riff is nice, too, but the drummer still beats his ride like a monkey. more dynamics! this is music, not dishwashing. now the song has missed the chance to become something bigger, i expect it to fade out soon.
10:15. isis-style vocals. band seems to be a bit off.
ending: cool riff.

summary: quite good, but it could have been much better. i can sense a certain fear of walking ALL the way down. but the talent is there.