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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
Every morning, I wake up to battery honey.
During my idealistic youth, it seemed a very wise move indeed to care that there was a difference between free-range honey and battery honey. Under normal circumstances, a bee finds a flower, some blossom or other, and siphons nectar from it. Returning to the hive it performs a cavorting, insectile dance and further bees are dispatched, strip-mining the surrounding flora of their various fluids.
Of course, the whole process is ludicrously inefficient. Far easier then to simply leave sugar by the kilo directly outside man-made hives, bees simply filling in the gaps in a chain. They fly directly from wooden hives to the sugar, there is no interpretive dance here, the sugar is there daily, and over the course of weeks and months it is eroded, transmuted by means of an apian alchemy I can’t comprehend into a sweet golden gel that is, if not honey, then just distant enough from sugar enough that I can’t bring myself to care.
So every morning I stir my battery honey into the reconstituted shredded tealeaf broth, before I head from my house to work… and while there I write up documents that will likely be irrelevant in two day’s time. Quite much I get done doesn’t matter, more work arrives the next day, and there’s never quite so very much as to make things difficult. Still, I buzz from my house to work every day, and I bring home the sugar I use to… well, to do whatever it is I do when I’m not working, and then repeat the process.
Still, just when it gets you down, there’s always that honey
 
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honey makes my teeth fall out
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
On March 30 2010 09:14 JohnColtrane wrote:
honey makes my teeth fall out
Believe me I'm sorely aware of that fact 
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Honey is good. 
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
I was listening to a band called, "Honey is Cool" when I wrote this... I'm not sure that the two were related, but it was nice
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On March 30 2010 09:14 JohnColtrane wrote:
honey makes my teeth fall out
is this true? -_-;
I thought natural honey was good for your health...
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
Good for your overall health, but not great for your teeth. Even natural honey is very high in sugar (being so very much nectar).
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Osaka27157 Posts
Good morning fellow drone.
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On March 30 2010 09:20 The6357 wrote:is this true? -_-; I thought natural honey was good for your health...
oranges are good for your health but they are sugary so not so great for your chompers
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Calgary25991 Posts
Nice read
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that picture is making my mouth water
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United States22883 Posts
Love that post.
The best breakfast I've ever had was just Moroccan fried flat bread (forget the name) served with honey and mint tea.
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On March 30 2010 11:02 Jibba wrote:Love that post. The best breakfast I've ever had was just Moroccan fried flat bread (forget the name) served with honey and mint tea.
If that's your best you haven't tried my moms "half-pizzas"
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United States22883 Posts
On March 30 2010 11:05 TrippLeC wrote:Show nested quote +On March 30 2010 11:02 Jibba wrote:Love that post. The best breakfast I've ever had was just Moroccan fried flat bread (forget the name) served with honey and mint tea. If that's your best you haven't tried my moms "half-pizzas"
Care to send me some? What's in it?
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
I'm really glad people enjoyed the post
On March 30 2010 09:23 Manifesto7 wrote:Good morning fellow drone.
I laughed out loud and woke my girlfriend up 
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
Thanks man, it was only after I'd posted it that I realised that "insectile" definitely isn't a word
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I enjoyed the post but I still don't understand what "battery honey" is.
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
"Battery chickens" are the chickens kept in tiny pens so they can produce eggs and take up as little space as possible. They routinely have their beaks clipped etc. so that they can't harm themselves or escape the wee box they live in.
Battery honey is less bad, but it's basically when your bees make honey directly from sugar rather than nectar
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On March 31 2010 01:25 SirJolt wrote:"Battery chickens" are the chickens kept in tiny pens so they can produce eggs and take up as little space as possible. They routinely have their beaks clipped etc. so that they can't harm themselves or escape the wee box they live in. Battery honey is less bad, but it's basically when your bees make honey directly from sugar rather than nectar
Hmm i dunno but this post seems to be more of a social commentary - allegory =P
Sometimes when I pass by office cubicles, food courts, shopping complexes with rows of stores, I can't help thinking that perhaps some alien race is farming humans for their own pleasure O_o
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I'm a beekeeper and own a hive in my backyard. Every year I get around 70-100 pounds of honey that I either eat, sell or give to family/friends
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I go to my cottage every couple weekends. It's an hour drive from my house. A few minutes drive from my cottage, there are multiple apiaries. I buy huge tubs of local honey for ridiculously cheap prices.
There are so many different kinds and it's fantastic. I recommend you switch up your daily routine and try out some others. They have different health benefits and taste different.
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the Dagon Knight4010 Posts
Wow, I had no idea TL had so many honey fanatics, and even a beekeeper! :D
I do sometimes try different types of honey, the last was Manuka for a bad throat, it tasted strange, but I got to like it... not sure it really helped much, but I liked the idea of it
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5394 Posts
On March 31 2010 06:47 SirJolt wrote:
Wow, I had no idea TL had so many honey fanatics
McDonalds is the only fast food joint with real honey. I used to swing by there and pick up honey packets in the morning, and eat them during the day at school. Now I can't eat it straight anymore; it makes me feel sick, but honey is still great on fries, roast beef, and breaded chicken.
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On March 31 2010 07:33 pheer wrote:Show nested quote +On March 31 2010 06:47 SirJolt wrote:
Wow, I had no idea TL had so many honey fanatics McDonalds is the only fast food joint with real honey. What? McDonalds has real honey? Surprised me considering even the smaller and local fast food restaurants here all seem to only have artificial honey. I'll have to check that out next time I'm there.
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I love honey. ^_^ As Day[9] once said, honey+green tea is AMAZING for the throat. Had a cold, drank a ton of that, hahaha. Kept me awake, tasted delicious, and soothed my throat. :D
Also, there's always a local farmers market here, and they sell like 75 sticks of flavored honey for 10 bucks, lol. Might be a little expensive, but man, that's like my candy. Honey>>>>>Sugar to me, lol. I just love it, hahaha.
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EPT![[image loading]](http://sirjolt.xadacka.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/honey-300x225.jpg)
![[image loading]](/staff/Manifesto7/wile_timeclock.jpg)
