EPTShit, I have to go talk to this asshole now. What a life - getting up at 6 am to ask this morbidly obese bundle of sunshine if his last bowel movement was successful. Hey buddy, if you hate the hospital so much, maybe you shouldn't have smoked 3 packs a day for 40 years. Getting on a treadmill probably wouldn't have hurt either. I would be the happiest guy alive if you would just sleep with your goddamn pants on, so I don't have to be greeted every day by Mr. Willy. Yes, I'm asking a lot of questions. Believe it or not, they're all relevant to your health. How do you not know what COPD is? I mean, I can understand why the layperson would not know much about it, but you've had it for ten years and you've probably heard this spiel hundreds of times. TAKE YOUR MEDS. USE YOUR OXYGEN. STOP SMOKING. Perhaps then, magically, you will stop having to come here so often. By the way, thanks for your vague one-word answers. That really helps speed things along. I have to go see another patient and check the labs again before rounds, so excuse me if I walk away quickly while you're giving me the stink-eye. I hope you can leave today.
