EPT
*Make sure you click on all the 'show nested quotes.' Don't miss out!* Also the colors in quotes are almost always done by me to make it easier to follow what happened.
Disclaimer:
Don't take this seriously whatsoever. That is all.
Disclaimer:
Don't take this seriously whatsoever. That is all.
+ Show Spoiler [Ace] +
1. You are Ace. You believe someone, or everyone, is acting stupidly. What do you do?
![[image loading]](http://content.internetvideoarchive.com/content/photos/164/000692_40.jpg)
b) Argue with L (for 50 pages until you both die)
c)
d) "tl;dr. All I see is a big wall of fail"
e)
f) "fuck it.
Let's turn this shit into Armageddon.
execute:Shockeyy"
Chaos ensues and the town implodes after Shockkey dies.
g)
![[image loading]](http://www.boningtons.com/blog/image.axd?picture=2009%2F9%2Fauctionhouse.jpg)
h) Get rolechecked as mafia day 1. Don't worry it's all good, proceed to tell the town why the DT is a scumbag and why he should be lynched. Town lynches DT all while protesting vigorously against it.
i)
j) Lynch Vivi
+ Show Spoiler [LTT] +
2) You are LTT, son of L, and you are confronted with a vexing problem. What do you do?
a) Disguise your way into the enemy irc channel
b) Ignore your win conditions and kill Chuiu because he screwed your team over a year ago.
c) Vanish without a trace due to the above incident and return with no explanation.
d) Pyrrhuloxia claimed you are the son of L? That is not cool. Make sure he dies in every night post of your game.
e)
b) Ignore your win conditions and kill Chuiu because he screwed your team over a year ago.
c) Vanish without a trace due to the above incident and return with no explanation.
d) Pyrrhuloxia claimed you are the son of L? That is not cool. Make sure he dies in every night post of your game.
e)
+ Show Spoiler [L] +
3) You are L. The day has just started and you don't even know your role yet, what do you do?
a) Attack Ace
b) Attack Ace some more and vote for him.
c) Attack Scamp
d) Attack Foolishness
e) Get executed by BM out of the blue.
f) Get nuked by Tree Hugger out of the blue.
g) Get day vigi'd by Citizen out of the blue.
h)
i) Lynch vivi
j) Lynch Bill Murray
k) Lynch Bill Murray again
l) Your mafia family is badly losing to the other family, 4 members to 7. Ver is the town leader, has multiple medics at his command, and has just given you two confirmed mafia of the other family to shoot. However, he also wants to lynch you tomorrow, thinking you are in the winning family. What do you do?
b) Attack Ace some more and vote for him.
c) Attack Scamp
d) Attack Foolishness
e) Get executed by BM out of the blue.
f) Get nuked by Tree Hugger out of the blue.
g) Get day vigi'd by Citizen out of the blue.
h)
i) Lynch vivi
j) Lynch Bill Murray
![[image loading]](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2089/2086371096_e9907801c2.jpg)
k) Lynch Bill Murray again
l) Your mafia family is badly losing to the other family, 4 members to 7. Ver is the town leader, has multiple medics at his command, and has just given you two confirmed mafia of the other family to shoot. However, he also wants to lynch you tomorrow, thinking you are in the winning family. What do you do?
+ Show Spoiler [Chezinu] +
4. You are Chezinu. Your mafia team is not communicating, what do you do?
a) Create another mafia team within the game. Add a forum for your new team, create multiple access levels and secret passwords and codes. Ignore your real mafia team and work with your new one.
*Some of Chezinu's pm's from that game.*
b) Post gibberish. PM gibberish.
*I literally have a couple dozen pm's like this. Quoting all his similar thread posts would be longer than this piece itself.*
c) Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: It has to be in bold for me to accept it
Chezinu: Execute Malongo
Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: okay guys...game officially starts NOW
Chezinu: I won't kill you Malongo
Chezinu: I'm not going to do it Malongo, we are on the same team
Chezinu: You know you don't want to do it Malongo
Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: Chezinu the Third Party has died!
d) Long live the Brown Empire! Revolt Against the Blues!
e) You are a DT:
i) DT check a mafia. Hint that he's mafia all night long while PMing said mafia. When Day pops up, claim DT and taunt the Rolechecked mafia by spamming his PM box. Get disappointed when said mafia fails to respond to your PMs.
ii) Attempt to ask the mafia questions publically in the thread.
iii) The next night, rolecheck another mafia. Post 6 times in a row IN ALL CAPS, taunting the mafia while fabricating PMs evidence to support your case. Follow this up with another 5 posts in a row, yelling your chant: DIENEMY!!!
f) Chat with Foolishness in irc (he's godfather, you're detective and you rolechecked him, and you both know the others role but he doesn't know that you know his). After he leaves, have a conversation with yourself. PM it to Foolishness afterwards saying: "i had this conversation after you left, thought you might be interested."
g) You think Ver is mafia all of a sudden after working with him all game. What do you do? Send him all (40-50) pm's you've made the entire game. For good measure, send him another dozen custom made inane ones to showcase your insanity and confuse him!
h) You are in the smurf game, what shall your name and guise be? Ooh, how about being the ReporterSmurf and contributing with a daily newspaper full of gems like this!
i) You decide the mafia hitlists. Who do you hit? Blues? Analysts? You are smarter than that. Shoot players based off of their number in the signup list, namely players 7, 15, 19, and 21. Why them? Because it spells GOSU. Now that is a mafia with style!
j)
k)
*Some of Chezinu's pm's from that game.*
b) Post gibberish. PM gibberish.
*I literally have a couple dozen pm's like this. Quoting all his similar thread posts would be longer than this piece itself.*
c) Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: It has to be in bold for me to accept it
Chezinu: Execute Malongo
Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: okay guys...game officially starts NOW
Chezinu: I won't kill you Malongo
Chezinu: I'm not going to do it Malongo, we are on the same team
Chezinu: You know you don't want to do it Malongo
Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: Chezinu the Third Party has died!
d) Long live the Brown Empire! Revolt Against the Blues!
e) You are a DT:
i) DT check a mafia. Hint that he's mafia all night long while PMing said mafia. When Day pops up, claim DT and taunt the Rolechecked mafia by spamming his PM box. Get disappointed when said mafia fails to respond to your PMs.
ii) Attempt to ask the mafia questions publically in the thread.
iii) The next night, rolecheck another mafia. Post 6 times in a row IN ALL CAPS, taunting the mafia while fabricating PMs evidence to support your case. Follow this up with another 5 posts in a row, yelling your chant: DIENEMY!!!
f) Chat with Foolishness in irc (he's godfather, you're detective and you rolechecked him, and you both know the others role but he doesn't know that you know his). After he leaves, have a conversation with yourself. PM it to Foolishness afterwards saying: "i had this conversation after you left, thought you might be interested."
g) You think Ver is mafia all of a sudden after working with him all game. What do you do? Send him all (40-50) pm's you've made the entire game. For good measure, send him another dozen custom made inane ones to showcase your insanity and confuse him!
h) You are in the smurf game, what shall your name and guise be? Ooh, how about being the ReporterSmurf and contributing with a daily newspaper full of gems like this!
i) You decide the mafia hitlists. Who do you hit? Blues? Analysts? You are smarter than that. Shoot players based off of their number in the signup list, namely players 7, 15, 19, and 21. Why them? Because it spells GOSU. Now that is a mafia with style!
j)
k)
+ Show Spoiler [Caller] +
5. Your are Caller and are bored of trolling the thread. What do you do?
a) "lol I got half drunk and vigi'd Ace"
b) Host an insane and horrifically imbalanced game. So imbalanced you have to restart it. Does that deter you? Hell no, host 5 more.
c) Are you under no suspicion? Now's the right time to claim mafia in the thread. But claim you are the OTHER family. Surprise!
d) Forget claiming mafia, claim everything! Are you under suspicion? No problem.
Step 1) Claim alignment cop from Israel, say you are insane or paranoid, and that your check was manipulated by a fictionuous bus driver. Launch town onto side track discussion of how this nonexistent bus driver works.
Step 2) "Check" another person and clarify you are insane, not paranoid.
Step 3) Claim you are in fact Japan, not Israel, an even shadier country. In addition, report that you are certain you are insane and that citizen must be mafia.
Step 4) Deliberately misinterpret citizen's role and claim he is the paranoid gun owner, another nonexistent role. Divert town onto debate about how this nonexistent PGO works. Town mislynches. GG
e) Someone might be faking role pm's? No problem, Caller to the rescue:
f) Host a game and never finish it
g) Have all your clues death's be rakes up the butt. And kill Pyrrhuloxia again in your day post for good measure.
h) You have hosted a game. Now, finally you have all the power and can decide who gets what role. Let's see some roles are distributed ( full role list of game 1 is lost. Coincidence?).
Game 1.0 (aborted)
Attackzerg (Admiral Ackbar/Suicide Bomber)
Camlito (Mafia)
Mynock (Mafia)
Showtime (Medic)
Ace (Godfather)
Showtime - Vigilante
Ver (NRA member - thinks he is green)
Incogntio (Rockstar BG)
RebirthofLegend (Village Idiot)
Qatol (Jack)
Game 1.1 -
Attackzerg (Admiral Ackbar/Suicide Bomber) lol?
Ace (Medic)
Ver (Mole - thinks he is green)
Showtime (Vote Rigger)
Mynock (DT)
Camlito (Meth Man)
Incogntio (Godfather)
Bloodyc0bbler (Village Idiot)
When accused of manipulating role distribution, what is your defense? "I used an RNG." Okay sure, but how many times?
i) Are you mafia and relatively clean? Excellent, how about you give yourself away?
j)
And then...
k) Red Army Mafia Victory Conditions
b) Host an insane and horrifically imbalanced game. So imbalanced you have to restart it. Does that deter you? Hell no, host 5 more.
c) Are you under no suspicion? Now's the right time to claim mafia in the thread. But claim you are the OTHER family. Surprise!
d) Forget claiming mafia, claim everything! Are you under suspicion? No problem.
Step 1) Claim alignment cop from Israel, say you are insane or paranoid, and that your check was manipulated by a fictionuous bus driver. Launch town onto side track discussion of how this nonexistent bus driver works.
Step 2) "Check" another person and clarify you are insane, not paranoid.
Step 3) Claim you are in fact Japan, not Israel, an even shadier country. In addition, report that you are certain you are insane and that citizen must be mafia.
Step 4) Deliberately misinterpret citizen's role and claim he is the paranoid gun owner, another nonexistent role. Divert town onto debate about how this nonexistent PGO works. Town mislynches. GG
e) Someone might be faking role pm's? No problem, Caller to the rescue:
![[image loading]](http://i43.tinypic.com/esos36.png)
f) Host a game and never finish it
g) Have all your clues death's be rakes up the butt. And kill Pyrrhuloxia again in your day post for good measure.
h) You have hosted a game. Now, finally you have all the power and can decide who gets what role. Let's see some roles are distributed ( full role list of game 1 is lost. Coincidence?).
Game 1.0 (aborted)
Attackzerg (Admiral Ackbar/Suicide Bomber)
Camlito (Mafia)
Mynock (Mafia)
Showtime (Medic)
Ace (Godfather)
Showtime - Vigilante
Ver (NRA member - thinks he is green)
Incogntio (Rockstar BG)
RebirthofLegend (Village Idiot)
Qatol (Jack)
Game 1.1 -
Attackzerg (Admiral Ackbar/Suicide Bomber) lol?
Ace (Medic)
Ver (Mole - thinks he is green)
Showtime (Vote Rigger)
Mynock (DT)
Camlito (Meth Man)
Incogntio (Godfather)
Bloodyc0bbler (Village Idiot)
When accused of manipulating role distribution, what is your defense? "I used an RNG." Okay sure, but how many times?
i) Are you mafia and relatively clean? Excellent, how about you give yourself away?
j)
![[image loading]](http://th02.deviantart.net/fs14/300W/f/2007/041/6/d/In_Soviet_Russia____by_RainbowJerk.png)
And then...
k) Red Army Mafia Victory Conditions
+ Show Spoiler [MrBabyHands] +
6. You are MrBabyHands
a) Invade the enemy irc channel
b) You are mafia, smurfing in an 80 player game with friends from another site who would instantly call you out if they knew you were in the game. How do you treat them? Why, make sure your only posts in the thread are messing with them!
c) Tell someone who you told that you aren't in the game that you think he's a DT or medic. He proceeds to tell you privately that he is a DT. In fact you are in the game as mafia and you shoot him the next night. He rages when he finds out. Claim it's his fault for telling you and you are innocent of all wrongdoing.
d) make sure everyone knows you are a badass every post you make. If this does not convince them of your manliness, post pictures of badass which look phallic in nature.
![[image loading]](http://greek9.com/tux/babyhands.png)
![[image loading]](http://greek9.com/tux/c949491f5ec8e8c84f6c4b697c383e34.jpg)
e) Come up with creative nicknames!
- In reply
f) You're mafia? That's okay! Convince L the medic he will win the game for the town if only blocks that vigi hit on you! Once you survive the night, you need some incredible analysis so the town will stop accusing you, right? Here's some!
+ Show Spoiler [Ver] +
7. You are Ver. You just got elected Mayor. What do you do?
a) "STOP PM'ING ME. I GOT 150 PMs IN 2 DAYS"
b) Make a long post demanding roleclaims to yourself just because you wanted to see what would happen.
c) Lurk until you're about to get lynched, then write an essay to deflect the vote. Go back to lurking until you're on the chopping block again. Repeat.
d) Ace, L, and Mynock are arguing so much you don't want to read the thread anymore. What's your solution? Don't read it! Proceed to get swindled in pm's by a mafia and a traitor who had terrible thread behavior.
e) Congratulations, you have just burned a mafia on day 1 and gotten their team terrified of you. Plead for medic protection. Proceed to get triple stacked and killed, with only one medic out of four protecting you. One of the medics even protted your target, what a friendly chap! The two others both apologize after you die, claiming they thought everyone else would protect you.
f) Hosting now eh? Miscount the votes. Apologize profusely. Miscount the votes again. Agree to never count votes again. To top it off, accidentally indict a mafia and hurriedly make vague statements to dissuade anyone of said mafia's guilt.
g) You have bagged two mafia on day 1 and are the mayor. The pardoner wants to pardon one of the candidates though. Go do other stuff for several hours. Uh oh, you vacillated too long and now you have a serious fever, are delirious and have to wake up in 6 hours for your thesis defense. Randomly add a green to your consideration instead of just lynching the guy you analyzed as red. It's okay though, just flip a coin? Uh oh, the wrong candidate won the coin toss? Ah make it a best of 7. Crap the wrong guy still won? Oh well, just lynch him and cry the next day. Oversleep your thesis defense.
h) Lynch Ace because you think he's the traitor and he wants to pardon your main target. He flips green and now the town is going to lynch you. If the town lynches you, they lose the game. What do you do? Commit seppuku!
i) Get rolechecked by two people within 5 minutes of each other day 1 and die day 1. Shoot two of the DTs. Get swindled by the other:
j) Smurf as a coach. Oh rubbish, nobody is listening to you? That's fine, just start signing your posts with a picture of Professor Badass. All good!
b) Make a long post demanding roleclaims to yourself just because you wanted to see what would happen.
c) Lurk until you're about to get lynched, then write an essay to deflect the vote. Go back to lurking until you're on the chopping block again. Repeat.
d) Ace, L, and Mynock are arguing so much you don't want to read the thread anymore. What's your solution? Don't read it! Proceed to get swindled in pm's by a mafia and a traitor who had terrible thread behavior.
e) Congratulations, you have just burned a mafia on day 1 and gotten their team terrified of you. Plead for medic protection. Proceed to get triple stacked and killed, with only one medic out of four protecting you. One of the medics even protted your target, what a friendly chap! The two others both apologize after you die, claiming they thought everyone else would protect you.
f) Hosting now eh? Miscount the votes. Apologize profusely. Miscount the votes again. Agree to never count votes again. To top it off, accidentally indict a mafia and hurriedly make vague statements to dissuade anyone of said mafia's guilt.
g) You have bagged two mafia on day 1 and are the mayor. The pardoner wants to pardon one of the candidates though. Go do other stuff for several hours. Uh oh, you vacillated too long and now you have a serious fever, are delirious and have to wake up in 6 hours for your thesis defense. Randomly add a green to your consideration instead of just lynching the guy you analyzed as red. It's okay though, just flip a coin? Uh oh, the wrong candidate won the coin toss? Ah make it a best of 7. Crap the wrong guy still won? Oh well, just lynch him and cry the next day. Oversleep your thesis defense.
h) Lynch Ace because you think he's the traitor and he wants to pardon your main target. He flips green and now the town is going to lynch you. If the town lynches you, they lose the game. What do you do? Commit seppuku!
i) Get rolechecked by two people within 5 minutes of each other day 1 and die day 1. Shoot two of the DTs. Get swindled by the other:
j) Smurf as a coach. Oh rubbish, nobody is listening to you? That's fine, just start signing your posts with a picture of Professor Badass. All good!
![[image loading]](http://hubba-u.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/professor_badass.jpg)
+ Show Spoiler [0cz3c] +
8. Which one of these posts are not by 0cz3c (if any)?
a) "Fellow townspeople! Do not be deceived by that who lies right in front of us. The town is stained with the red blood of a jackal, the quick and witty jackal who seeks to escape harm with his sly maneuvers. We must not be deceived, less the jackal escapes from beneath our grasp, from beneath the trap so well orchestrated even the most deceitful of creatures would have succumbed."
b) "To establish myself as an innocent, green townie, I will, from now on, only write in the green font while in this topic. I think that that will prove that I cannot be any other role than a green townie. "
c) "You'd better wait another day before you decide you aren't mafia. One of the clues tomorrow might point to you. Don't pm yourself your role just in case." - A 3rd Party
"Good point. I think I'll do that. Can never be too cautious in these situations. "
d) "And this is what I get from TruthBringer, a person who falsely and pretentiously pretends to bring the truth to the town. I'm...I'm...I'm deeply offended!"
e) "I was asked to do some clue analysis earlier.
From all the clues (I'd rather not copy and paste, it's far too long), I've reached the conclusion that I am not hinted at. This leads me to believe that I indeed am not mafia. That's relieving. This looks fun; I'll do some more clue analysis tomorrow!"
f) "I see no links to nobility so far. The mafia being bold and assertive might be a farfetched link to ser, but it is pretty farfetched
. The ancient links to ser might be a problem though. In many of the definitions of ser, some of the common roots are from the Gauls and Catalans, who were most definitely barbarians. And the mafia leader did utter a barbaric cry. I'm getting a little scared here. But that's not the end of it...So overall I'm a little suspicious and conflicted. There's no concrete link, which makes me feel safe, but there's a lot of small ones. Based on these set of clues I can't tell if I am mafia or innocent 
We shall have to wait and see what day 2 brings!"
g) Are you a lurking mafia under attack? What shall your suave defense be?
h) "Yes. My first role no longer is Town Idiot. It is, in fact, a Boondock Saint. As I told RoL in anticipation of this event (yes, RoL, my PMs make sense, you just have to make sense of them), "People change." And indeed, I have changed. Transformed. Undergone a metamorphosis. I am no longer a town idiot. I am now a ferocious and mighty Boondock Saint. Rawr ! Bear in mind that I retain the role of insane(?) Jack and DT. I still have them and I will be utilizing them after I trick mafia with my next post (i.e. me being a veteran, for they'll never know it's coming !). What role will I have in the future? Will I change once more? Can I possibly go this entire game with only having one role? I don't know. I don't know what the future holds for me; I'll just have to accept its truths with a gracious hand."
b) "To establish myself as an innocent, green townie, I will, from now on, only write in the green font while in this topic. I think that that will prove that I cannot be any other role than a green townie. "
c) "You'd better wait another day before you decide you aren't mafia. One of the clues tomorrow might point to you. Don't pm yourself your role just in case." - A 3rd Party
"Good point. I think I'll do that. Can never be too cautious in these situations. "
d) "And this is what I get from TruthBringer, a person who falsely and pretentiously pretends to bring the truth to the town. I'm...I'm...I'm deeply offended!"
e) "I was asked to do some clue analysis earlier.
From all the clues (I'd rather not copy and paste, it's far too long), I've reached the conclusion that I am not hinted at. This leads me to believe that I indeed am not mafia. That's relieving. This looks fun; I'll do some more clue analysis tomorrow!"
f) "I see no links to nobility so far. The mafia being bold and assertive might be a farfetched link to ser, but it is pretty farfetched
. The ancient links to ser might be a problem though. In many of the definitions of ser, some of the common roots are from the Gauls and Catalans, who were most definitely barbarians. And the mafia leader did utter a barbaric cry. I'm getting a little scared here. But that's not the end of it...So overall I'm a little suspicious and conflicted. There's no concrete link, which makes me feel safe, but there's a lot of small ones. Based on these set of clues I can't tell if I am mafia or innocent We shall have to wait and see what day 2 brings!"g) Are you a lurking mafia under attack? What shall your suave defense be?
h) "Yes. My first role no longer is Town Idiot. It is, in fact, a Boondock Saint. As I told RoL in anticipation of this event (yes, RoL, my PMs make sense, you just have to make sense of them), "People change." And indeed, I have changed. Transformed. Undergone a metamorphosis. I am no longer a town idiot. I am now a ferocious and mighty Boondock Saint. Rawr ! Bear in mind that I retain the role of insane(?) Jack and DT. I still have them and I will be utilizing them after I trick mafia with my next post (i.e. me being a veteran, for they'll never know it's coming !). What role will I have in the future? Will I change once more? Can I possibly go this entire game with only having one role? I don't know. I don't know what the future holds for me; I'll just have to accept its truths with a gracious hand."
+ Show Spoiler [Foolishness] +
9. You are Foolishness.
a) NOBODY CARES
b) Troll for 3 days then bust out a super mafia list. Get ignored.
c) NOBODY CARES
d) Get shot night 1. Don't be medic protected.
e) Finger a mafia in the thread the first day. Get shot night 1. Don't get medic protected.
f) Vote for a mafia in the first day. Get shot night 1. Don't get medic protected.
g) Get Shot night 1. Don't get medic protected. Luckily you are a mad hatter and your bomb kills a mafia. Only one more mafia dies the entire game (out of 8).
h) Get shot night 1. Don't get medic protected. Luckily, you are a veteran and you live! Guess what? Everyone else thinks you are the godfather faking a hit! Of course you can't live past the first night.
i)
????
j) Foolishness is smurfing. How shall he act?
k) Your mafia family is going to last minute vote switch which will guarantee you vitctory! Oops half your mafia team just went afk after they promised they'd be there for the vote switch! The town proceeds to win too.
l) Get Arrested
b) Troll for 3 days then bust out a super mafia list. Get ignored.
c) NOBODY CARES
d) Get shot night 1. Don't be medic protected.
e) Finger a mafia in the thread the first day. Get shot night 1. Don't get medic protected.
f) Vote for a mafia in the first day. Get shot night 1. Don't get medic protected.
g) Get Shot night 1. Don't get medic protected. Luckily you are a mad hatter and your bomb kills a mafia. Only one more mafia dies the entire game (out of 8).
h) Get shot night 1. Don't get medic protected. Luckily, you are a veteran and you live! Guess what? Everyone else thinks you are the godfather faking a hit! Of course you can't live past the first night.
i)
????
j) Foolishness is smurfing. How shall he act?
k) Your mafia family is going to last minute vote switch which will guarantee you vitctory! Oops half your mafia team just went afk after they promised they'd be there for the vote switch! The town proceeds to win too.
l) Get Arrested
![[image loading]](http://www.robertamsterdam.com/arrest_540.jpg)
+ Show Spoiler [Vivi57] +
10. You are Vivi57 and you have a pressing engagement at 11:30. What do you do?
a) Get lynched day 1
b) Lurk
c)![[image loading]](http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/3585/ragevivi.jpg)
d) Decide off a clue-check that the mayor is not the clumsy mafia and roleclaim to him! Too bad the mayor is the snake archer mafia, not the klutz!
b) Lurk
c)
d) Decide off a clue-check that the mayor is not the clumsy mafia and roleclaim to him! Too bad the mayor is the snake archer mafia, not the klutz!
+ Show Spoiler [Abenson] +
11. You are Abenson and you are bored of lurking. What should you do?
a) Spam
b) Post a one-liner
c) Post a one-liner in Russian
d) Post a two-liner
e) "Trying to decide whether or not I should make a huge celebration post regarding my icon"
f) "I'm going to give my analysis of this tomorrow." Never post it.
b) Post a one-liner
c) Post a one-liner in Russian
d) Post a two-liner
e) "Trying to decide whether or not I should make a huge celebration post regarding my icon"
f) "I'm going to give my analysis of this tomorrow." Never post it.
+ Show Spoiler [Quickstriker] +
12. You are Quickstriker, and you are under suspicion. What do you do?
a) Create a blog entry of your sister's wedding in the mafia thread
b) Tell the story of what you did in the bathroom last night
c) "I have returned from my trip to Jersey to meet my father's friend daughter with my father and..." [Removed because nobody cares]
d) "Table of Contents of QuickStriker's post on 4/26/09:
i. Introduction
ia. Reasoning of afk/MIA for several days
ib. Opening Statements and points to list...(20 items remaining)" [Removed because nobody cares]
e) Berate Qatol for "misusing his mafia forum god powers" because he says you can't strategically modkill yourself.
b) Tell the story of what you did in the bathroom last night
c) "I have returned from my trip to Jersey to meet my father's friend daughter with my father and..." [Removed because nobody cares]
d) "Table of Contents of QuickStriker's post on 4/26/09:
i. Introduction
ia. Reasoning of afk/MIA for several days
ib. Opening Statements and points to list...(20 items remaining)" [Removed because nobody cares]
e) Berate Qatol for "misusing his mafia forum god powers" because he says you can't strategically modkill yourself.
+ Show Spoiler [Showtime!] +
13. You are Showtime!, note that exclamation mark, and the best player [alive], and it is day 3. Your team is losing. What do you do?
a) Blame the host
b) Blame your team
c) Surrender
d) Enter a deal with the mafia from day 1 to act with them and be converted. Successfully enter the town's blue circle and subvert control over everyone, effectively winning the game on your own. Get vigi'ed by a crazed townie before you are converted and lose.
e) Piss off everyone playing the game after you ragequit (again). A third of them never play another game.
f) The host of the smurf game has asked everyone to not try to figure out whose smurf is who. What do you do day 1? Naturally, try find out everyone's smurfs!
f) Brag about how you figured out who was playing which smurf. Get owned when the host posts the real list, showing you were almost all wrong.
b) Blame your team
c) Surrender
d) Enter a deal with the mafia from day 1 to act with them and be converted. Successfully enter the town's blue circle and subvert control over everyone, effectively winning the game on your own. Get vigi'ed by a crazed townie before you are converted and lose.
e) Piss off everyone playing the game after you ragequit (again). A third of them never play another game.
f) The host of the smurf game has asked everyone to not try to figure out whose smurf is who. What do you do day 1? Naturally, try find out everyone's smurfs!
f) Brag about how you figured out who was playing which smurf. Get owned when the host posts the real list, showing you were almost all wrong.
+ Show Spoiler [Mynock] +
14. You are Mynock and nobody is talking about you. what do you do?
a) Praise yourself
b) Blame your team
c) Explain why the game was imbalanced against your side
d) Complain about time zones
+ Show Spoiler [Bill Murray] +
15. You are Bill Murray and nobody is talking about you, yet. What do you do?
a) Spam the thread
b) "i would also like to request a detective to rolecheck me"
c) "I'm asking for a medic to protect me night #1"
d) Spam the thread. Congratulations, you now have 14% of total posts in a 30 person game.
e) PM 5 other unconfirmed players night 1 that you are the Detective because you fear that the person you rolechecked might be the Godfather.
f) Argue with DoctorHelvetica until you both forget what you are arguing about (30 pages later).
g) Spam the thread
h) Everyone got mad at Malongo executing Chezinu day 1. Now the town is peaceably discussing a plan of how to proceed day 2. Time for you to intervene! Execute L out of the blue. Mass chaos ensues with townies shooting each other at the start of every day. Town gets crushed and only kills 1/4 mafia.
i) Get the inventor role, the most imbalanced role ever, and use it like this: "i am inventing a newspaper for clues to be in the day post."
j) (same as 'i'): When a suspicious town demands he make his inventions clear and obvious instead of giving them names like a computer or cell phone, he finds a more innovative solution: "ill just invent an alignment checking kit that can only be used to check me so u will shut up."
k) Spam the thread
l) "i just realized my team has won all 3 times i've played
i may not be good, but i produce results"
m) Threaten the host
n) Continue to play after dying
o) Did I mention spamming the thread?
[01:58] Ver: even after being repeatedly warned not to spam
[01:58] Ver: he still has
[01:58] Ver: about
[01:58] Ver: 10%
[01:59] Ver: of total posts
[01:59] Ver: ....
p)
q) Host Harry Potter Mafia where you decide the rules.
1) Create a horrifically imbalanced game (goes without saying right?)
2) There are 3 siblings and 1 of them got modkilled. What do you do? Modkill the other 2 as well! Did they do anything wrong? Nope, who cares!
3) Drunkenly edit the rules midgame.
4) Let the mafia mayor pardon himself. Twice.
5) Change the rules midgame. Many times.
6) Tell a player he is the treestump and has no other power. Give him the nurse role later in addition because you feel like it.
7) Several players and outsiders proceed to revolt in the middle of the game, the first time in TL Mafia History. You love setting trends don't you?
q) Ooh hosting again are ya. Are the mafia winning despite the fact that you gave them 2 KP when they need 3 for balance? Uh oh that ain't falco. On day 4, the first time when 2 mafia are up for a double lynch, suddenly change the format from normal lynch to majority lynch. Mafia die within 4 hours of day starting before they can even post when one of them could have easily saved himself. Give the town the full 48 hours to discuss the revelations.
r) Save L from Tree.Hugger's nuke with your only anti-nuke. Versatile nukes L. Nuke Versatile in retaliation. She nukes you back. Oops, your nuke is a dud but hers isn't and you're out of anti-nukes!
b) "i would also like to request a detective to rolecheck me"
c) "I'm asking for a medic to protect me night #1"
d) Spam the thread. Congratulations, you now have 14% of total posts in a 30 person game.
e) PM 5 other unconfirmed players night 1 that you are the Detective because you fear that the person you rolechecked might be the Godfather.
f) Argue with DoctorHelvetica until you both forget what you are arguing about (30 pages later).
g) Spam the thread
h) Everyone got mad at Malongo executing Chezinu day 1. Now the town is peaceably discussing a plan of how to proceed day 2. Time for you to intervene! Execute L out of the blue. Mass chaos ensues with townies shooting each other at the start of every day. Town gets crushed and only kills 1/4 mafia.
i) Get the inventor role, the most imbalanced role ever, and use it like this: "i am inventing a newspaper for clues to be in the day post."
j) (same as 'i'): When a suspicious town demands he make his inventions clear and obvious instead of giving them names like a computer or cell phone, he finds a more innovative solution: "ill just invent an alignment checking kit that can only be used to check me so u will shut up."
k) Spam the thread
l) "i just realized my team has won all 3 times i've played
i may not be good, but i produce results"
m) Threaten the host
n) Continue to play after dying
o) Did I mention spamming the thread?
[01:58] Ver: even after being repeatedly warned not to spam
[01:58] Ver: he still has
[01:58] Ver: about
[01:58] Ver: 10%
[01:59] Ver: of total posts
[01:59] Ver: ....
p)
q) Host Harry Potter Mafia where you decide the rules.
1) Create a horrifically imbalanced game (goes without saying right?)
2) There are 3 siblings and 1 of them got modkilled. What do you do? Modkill the other 2 as well! Did they do anything wrong? Nope, who cares!
3) Drunkenly edit the rules midgame.
4) Let the mafia mayor pardon himself. Twice.
5) Change the rules midgame. Many times.
6) Tell a player he is the treestump and has no other power. Give him the nurse role later in addition because you feel like it.
7) Several players and outsiders proceed to revolt in the middle of the game, the first time in TL Mafia History. You love setting trends don't you?
q) Ooh hosting again are ya. Are the mafia winning despite the fact that you gave them 2 KP when they need 3 for balance? Uh oh that ain't falco. On day 4, the first time when 2 mafia are up for a double lynch, suddenly change the format from normal lynch to majority lynch. Mafia die within 4 hours of day starting before they can even post when one of them could have easily saved himself. Give the town the full 48 hours to discuss the revelations.
r) Save L from Tree.Hugger's nuke with your only anti-nuke. Versatile nukes L. Nuke Versatile in retaliation. She nukes you back. Oops, your nuke is a dud but hers isn't and you're out of anti-nukes!
![[image loading]](http://jeremayakovka.typepad.com/jeremayakovka/images/qassam_rocket_dud.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://i140.photobucket.com/albums/r5/javy97477/BulletBill.gif)
+ Show Spoiler [Qatol] +
16) You are Qatol:
a) You have received the DT role. What do you do first?
1) Read the rules
2) Read the rules again
3) Ask the host about the rules
4) Qatol: "I would like to votecheck the non-voter list for day 1."
Bloodyc0bbler: "You can't do that."
Qatol: "Yes I can."
Bloodyc0bbler: "No you can't. I'm the host I know my rules."
Qatol: "Look it says so under the DT description."
Bloodyc0bbler: "WTF? Ok it does. Here you go: 5/10 are mafia."
Qatol: GG
b) You have a confirmed innocent.
1) Read the rules
2) Read the rules again
3) Ask the host about the rules
4) Encourage everyone to "roleclaim to the innocent, even if they're just a townie" (everyone has a blue or red role)
5)
MasterOfChaos was indeed mafia.
c) Put a bomb on your girlfriend night 1 because if she's mafia, you know she will hit you!
d)
e) Ask to work with Ver via pm's. Send him a spreadsheet that labels every mafia as green because they are active. Get confused when Ver abruptly stops pm'ing you.
1) Read the rules
2) Read the rules again
3) Ask the host about the rules
4) Qatol: "I would like to votecheck the non-voter list for day 1."
Bloodyc0bbler: "You can't do that."
Qatol: "Yes I can."
Bloodyc0bbler: "No you can't. I'm the host I know my rules."
Qatol: "Look it says so under the DT description."
Bloodyc0bbler: "WTF? Ok it does. Here you go: 5/10 are mafia."
Qatol: GG
b) You have a confirmed innocent.
1) Read the rules
2) Read the rules again
3) Ask the host about the rules
4) Encourage everyone to "roleclaim to the innocent, even if they're just a townie" (everyone has a blue or red role)
5)
![[image loading]](http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n99/chuiu/TLmorning.png)
MasterOfChaos was indeed mafia.
c) Put a bomb on your girlfriend night 1 because if she's mafia, you know she will hit you!
d)
e) Ask to work with Ver via pm's. Send him a spreadsheet that labels every mafia as green because they are active. Get confused when Ver abruptly stops pm'ing you.
+ Show Spoiler [Flamewheel] +
17) You are Flamewheel.
a) You are omnipresent and post more than many players in most games, but you almost never play.
b) You feel like playing your 3rd game. Great! How about you smurf?
c) Feel like playing your 5th game? Great! Smurf again! But on a new smurf!!
d) Get lynched day 1. Ah crap that sucks. Wait you're the village idiot? Hurray!
e) I don't know what else to put here so: cutie.
f) I don't know what else to put here so:
![[image loading]](http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2006/10/18/lighting2_wideweb__470x332,0.jpg)
+ Show Spoiler [Dyno.] +
18) You are Dyno.. Qatol and LTT have concocted a plan to win the game and have decided to do it through you because you claimed veteran first. What do you do?
a)Somehow come up with the idea that a votecheck checked the number of mafia KP used to hit someone and think it's useless (it really lets you see how many mafia voted for someone during a lynch). Have Private Eyes all rolecheck each other instead to find any liars. Now town has no votechecks (they could only use 1 votecheck or 1 rolecheck). Voila!
b) Have all Mad Hatters (about 8-10ish) plant their bomb on the same person to make sure they die. Why? The hatters might be lying!
c) Lynch all the hatters because you think it will be faster at finding fake hatters. Ignore repeated points that hatters can just suicide, and those who don't are lynched.
d) The town has 10 medics that can use their power once every two days. How do you use them? Simple! 4 Medics protect LTT day 1 because you cannot die that day. 6 Medics protect you the next day. Oh wait, mafia KP is only 5? Psht who cares bro. 6 Medics on me. I'll lynch anyone who disagrees.
+ Show Spoiler [Pyrrhuloxia] +
19) You are Pyrrhuloxia, what's your game plan?
a) I have decided that Foolishness must be mafia because, so I must hide every post he makes by posting 4 more.
b) Bill Murray must be mafia with Foolishness, but since I cannot outpost Bill Murray, I will link the two together in a very convoluted fashion.
c) Pika Chu must be mafia, therefore every clue must point to him. If they don't seem to, I will make them seem to. Almost get elected mayor for your "stellar" day 1 clue analysis.
d) Vote for a townie to get killed 7 times in a row, and say "oops" as your only defense. Never get lynched and win the game.
e) Get medic protected every night despite being wrong about every suspect.
f)
g) Putting this here because I can't find a better place.
+ Show Spoiler [DoctorHelvetica] +
20) You are DoctorHelvetica, what are you going to do this game?
a) Post more than anyone else in the game. If Bill Murray is in the game, your objectives change from winning the game to outposting Bill.
b) Make Foolishness the GF of your mafia team without telling him.
c) Smurf, then midgame decide not to smurf anymore. Surprise! Proceed to get lynched a day later.
d) Have a medic roleclaim to you within 2 hours of the game starting. Proceed to get every other blue role within that first day despite not asking for them. Then spill the beans to the Godfather on the second day.
e) Is Bloodyc0bbler smurfing in your game? Excellent, time to tell him about 5 of the mafia, a couple greens, and some blues. Oh and to make things fair tell the mafia Bloodyc0bbler is smurfing but not which account is his.
f) Pin the mafia and accuse them. Great job! Wait something isn't right. Better second guess yourself and back off. Ahh that's better. All good now.
+ Show Spoiler [Malongo] +
21) You are Malongo, what do you do?
a) Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: It has to be in bold for me to accept it
Chezinu: Execute Malongo
Malongo: Execute Chezinu
Caller: okay guys...game officially starts NOW
Chezinu: I won't kill you Malongo
Chezinu: I'm not going to do it Malongo, we are on the same team
Chezinu: You know you don't want to do it Malongo
Malongo: Execute Chezinu
b) Get voted by Chezinu 30 minutes before the deadline. Refuse to save yourself by voting for the other major candidate. Flip green.
c) Day 1
![[image loading]](http://img8.imageshack.us/my.php?image=qatol.jpg)
![[image loading]](http://img66.imageshack.us/img66/8660/qatol.jpg)
Day 2
Day 3
After Day 3 Lynch
Day 5
*They are all mafia*
![[image loading]](http://tvmedia.ign.com/tv/image/article/826/826092/battlestar-galactica-razor-20071009052001010.jpg)
c)
d)
+ Show Spoiler [RebirthOfLegend] +
22) You are RebirthOfLegend, what do you do this game?
a) "I'm the Jack and I rolechecked Ace. He's mafia." (You are actually the Village Idiot and Ace is the Godfather) Ace proceeds to resign midway through day 1 and Caller is forced to restart the game. GG no re.
b) Ace the Detective Pardoner pardons Motbob. You don't like that, so you lynch him. It's okay though. The mad hatter has bombs on two mafia, L and Judge, and gets shot night 2. This should hand the town the game right? Nope, because you decide to protect L the godfather from the bomb.
c)
d) Give Scaramanga special permission to join your game despite the fact that he's on the banlist. Scaramanga proceeds to threaten to throw the game day 1 and you modkill him. Learned your lesson? Okay good. Let Bill Murray join your next game even though he's been permabanned. Proceed to modkill him becausem well, he's Bill Murray acting like classic BM and he ignored 5 warnings.
e)
*Annul posts a page of PMs*
f) Yell at people for not obeying the town's vote and threaten to lynch them without realizing the mafia stormed the voting and won
g) Claim Veteran (even though you're townie) in the thread. Then proceed to tell the godfather (BC) via IM that you are in fact not a Veteran. Who's getting deceived now!?
+ Show Spoiler [Coagulation] +
23) You are Coagulation, what do you do?
a) claim medic to DrH in PM 2 hours after the game begins just because.
b) Make sure none of your posts exceeds 3 lines in length
c) If you are blue make sure none of your posts exceeds one line in length.
d) Make sure your posts are IN ALL CAPS SO PEOPLE CAN HEAR YOU PROPERLY.
e) Claim medic to LSB after the day 1 lynch. New record!
f)
g)
+ Show Spoiler [Radfield] +
24) You are Radfield. Wait, where'd you go?
a) "Day 2: Radfield the Floridian Serial Killer has been day vigi'd"
b) "Day 2: Radfield the townie had been murdered in the night."
c) "Day 2: Team 1 (Radfield and Korynne) is now dead"
d) "Day 2: Radfield died with a blade in his side"
e) "Day 2: Radfield the sane Doctor is now dead."
f)
+ Show Spoiler [Fishball] +
25) Which one of these quotes were not made by or about Fishball?
a) "Plan eh? Don't worry.
I don't give a flipping fuck to whatever you guys are doing.
I'm really neither a townie or mafia. As I've told Ace, I'm just a guy playing for his own entertainment. Just FYI, I've already talked to a couple people through PM/MSN for the sake of boredom and to discuss my general observations, but I never posted anything in the thread to "persuade" the town or pull a movement in the background. I really care-less whoever wins at the end.
So whatever I enjoy doing, I'll continue to do so.
Also, take note that I never trusted you. I trust no one. But you(guys) don't have to convince me anything, mafia or not, as my existence shouldn't matter to either parties."
b) "quit PMing me"
c) "Fishball why have you not PM'd me your role" (The rest of the town did.) "Oh well, you're probably town anyways."
d) "You run the town's postal service! You can PM ___, ___, ___, and ___. However, you fear that at least one of the members might be mafia."
WTF are you serious?
"I can't think of a role that goes more against a player's style than forcing Fishball to manage a PM network" -Qatol
e) Decide to join PYP 3 against your initial will due to the following appealing options:
1. Get Day Vigilante and kill BC the instant the game starts.
2. Destroy LSB's plan and call it dumb repeatedly.
f)
I don't give a flipping fuck to whatever you guys are doing.
I'm really neither a townie or mafia. As I've told Ace, I'm just a guy playing for his own entertainment. Just FYI, I've already talked to a couple people through PM/MSN for the sake of boredom and to discuss my general observations, but I never posted anything in the thread to "persuade" the town or pull a movement in the background. I really care-less whoever wins at the end.
So whatever I enjoy doing, I'll continue to do so.
Also, take note that I never trusted you. I trust no one. But you(guys) don't have to convince me anything, mafia or not, as my existence shouldn't matter to either parties."
b) "quit PMing me"
c) "Fishball why have you not PM'd me your role" (The rest of the town did.) "Oh well, you're probably town anyways."
d) "You run the town's postal service! You can PM ___, ___, ___, and ___. However, you fear that at least one of the members might be mafia."
WTF are you serious?
"I can't think of a role that goes more against a player's style than forcing Fishball to manage a PM network" -Qatol
e) Decide to join PYP 3 against your initial will due to the following appealing options:
1. Get Day Vigilante and kill BC the instant the game starts.
2. Destroy LSB's plan and call it dumb repeatedly.
f)
+ Show Spoiler [Scaramanga] +
26) You are Scaramanga, which of these have you not done over the course of your mafia career?
a)
b) Promise not to leak the name of the DT who is PMing with you (you are townie). Immediately turn around and tell 3 people (1 of whom is mafia) the name of the DT.
c) Just got special permission to play despite being on the banlist? Great! Threaten to throw the game in day 1 and get permabanned.
d) Your only post is:
Qatol: So you're blue aren't you?
Scaramanga: No lol. Why do you say that? I've only made 1 post....
Qatol: Because you didn't include yourself in "greens," so you're not green. I don't think the mafia would let you make a post like that, so you're blue, aren't you?
Scaramanga: Damn it. Yeah, I'm vigi.
+ Show Spoiler [Fakesteve] +
27) You are Fakesteve and you want to be mayor. How do you do get elected?
a) "vote for me for mayor
or else"
b) "vote me or get banned"
c) "I PROMISE TO GOVERN THE FUCK OUTTA THIS PIECE OF SHIT TOWN
FAKESTEVE FOR MAYOR FOREVER"
d) "PICK THE EASILY BOUGHT-OFF MAYOR WITH NO SPINE
FAKESTEVE WILL ADHERE TO THE CONCENSUS
FAKESTEVE FOR MAYOR FOR LIFE"
e) "people are voting me because i'm ten times the mayor you are
only the fools are voting against me"
f) "continue voting for me
i'll clean this piece of town up. i'll clean it the fuck up right quick"
g) Get elected Mayor. Autolynch the most vocal player against you (townie). Get lynched by a revolting town 2 days later.
h) "Last time i was mayor y'all killed me like a bunch of retards because i talked a lil shit
a mayor always gotta talk a lil shit to the townspeople, it keeps 'em in line
UNLESS THEY FUCKIN HANG YOU FOR IT"
+ Show Spoiler [Batman] +
28) You are bumatlarge. Let's get to the point. You are the god damn batman:
+ Show Spoiler [Batman 1] +
On August 29 2010 02:18 bumatlarge wrote:
Time to be useful. I am the god damn batman
BumAtLarge was less tipsy then he wanted to be that night, stumbling around people's backyards. He had his favorite batman mask on of course. He found himself in a bush, right next to zeks' backdoor! What a nice gentleman, always giving bum change. Before bum had the chance to leave the kind man's abode, a spiffy looking fellow came through the backway (only zeks' closest friends came that way). Bum's vision was wiggty-wack, so he couldnt recognize him. Zeks greeted the man late at night with open arms. Soon after a scruffy man with blood in his eyes, looking for answers cam crashing over the fence. he almost ran right into bum, but he was to preoccupied with his mission (whatever that was. Immediately two other men broke from hiding paces, ignoring each other and heading straight through the backdoor. A large tussel took place, and bum was too drunk to actually help (HE WASNT SCARED, HES THE GODDAMN BATMAN)
Moments later, all 4 men left chasing one another into the night. Zeks, alive thank heavens, stared out at them a few seconds with a wide open mouth, that turned into determination rather quickly. He phoned the police, and bum knew better then to loiter much longer.
The next day, zeks stood in trial to decide the truth to his story. It turns out he was a suspect in the mishandling of some docuements, leading people to doubt him. Bum came up as his alter ego, Brum Warge, homeless philosopher extraordinaire. He verified zeks tune, and gave zeks a wink, but zeks was glaring intently ahead, that determined look again. Bum couldn't really sort out zeks motives, as he never finished 3rd grade, but he was willing to put his life in the hands of the town with zeks to authenticate what happened that night.
THE GOD DAMN BATMAN
Time to be useful. I am the god damn batman
BumAtLarge was less tipsy then he wanted to be that night, stumbling around people's backyards. He had his favorite batman mask on of course. He found himself in a bush, right next to zeks' backdoor! What a nice gentleman, always giving bum change. Before bum had the chance to leave the kind man's abode, a spiffy looking fellow came through the backway (only zeks' closest friends came that way). Bum's vision was wiggty-wack, so he couldnt recognize him. Zeks greeted the man late at night with open arms. Soon after a scruffy man with blood in his eyes, looking for answers cam crashing over the fence. he almost ran right into bum, but he was to preoccupied with his mission (whatever that was. Immediately two other men broke from hiding paces, ignoring each other and heading straight through the backdoor. A large tussel took place, and bum was too drunk to actually help (HE WASNT SCARED, HES THE GODDAMN BATMAN)
Moments later, all 4 men left chasing one another into the night. Zeks, alive thank heavens, stared out at them a few seconds with a wide open mouth, that turned into determination rather quickly. He phoned the police, and bum knew better then to loiter much longer.
The next day, zeks stood in trial to decide the truth to his story. It turns out he was a suspect in the mishandling of some docuements, leading people to doubt him. Bum came up as his alter ego, Brum Warge, homeless philosopher extraordinaire. He verified zeks tune, and gave zeks a wink, but zeks was glaring intently ahead, that determined look again. Bum couldn't really sort out zeks motives, as he never finished 3rd grade, but he was willing to put his life in the hands of the town with zeks to authenticate what happened that night.
THE GOD DAMN BATMAN
+ Show Spoiler [Batman 2] +
On August 31 2010 11:35 bumatlarge wrote:
AHEM I MEAN
Bumatlarge was high as a kite that evening. Town actually appreciated his batman antics and gave him some pot, which is legal in liquidia ofc. Batman mask set, he roamed the night. HOLY SHIT A CAT. Oh look LSD's house. Bum sneaks in the back alley, tries to climb over a fence, but it swings open at the climax of his climb. Gravity being the bitch that it is, sent bum on a 3 foot skydive into a trashcan! HOLY SHIT A RACCOON. OW. Bum thanks his lucky stars he developed a rabies immunity when he got bit by that raccoon a second ago. Before Bum could question his reasoning, he runs into some dude smokin a cig at the backdoor.
"Sup homes" Bum said in his gravelly voice
"Uh hello"
"You the tracker?" Bum said in his cementy voice
"Sure.. are you high?"
"YOU BET" Bum said in a stoned voice
bum quickly started talking about his encounters with untame beasts and popular topics often discussed by the stalkers of the night, and the other guy smoked a whole pack. before bum knew it, the sun was coming out!
"Aight later did what I needed too" and then he left.
"Oh wait- oh fudgepops" Bum pebbled.
AHEM I MEAN
Bumatlarge was high as a kite that evening. Town actually appreciated his batman antics and gave him some pot, which is legal in liquidia ofc. Batman mask set, he roamed the night. HOLY SHIT A CAT. Oh look LSD's house. Bum sneaks in the back alley, tries to climb over a fence, but it swings open at the climax of his climb. Gravity being the bitch that it is, sent bum on a 3 foot skydive into a trashcan! HOLY SHIT A RACCOON. OW. Bum thanks his lucky stars he developed a rabies immunity when he got bit by that raccoon a second ago. Before Bum could question his reasoning, he runs into some dude smokin a cig at the backdoor.
"Sup homes" Bum said in his gravelly voice
"Uh hello"
"You the tracker?" Bum said in his cementy voice
"Sure.. are you high?"
"YOU BET" Bum said in a stoned voice
bum quickly started talking about his encounters with untame beasts and popular topics often discussed by the stalkers of the night, and the other guy smoked a whole pack. before bum knew it, the sun was coming out!
"Aight later did what I needed too" and then he left.
"Oh wait- oh fudgepops" Bum pebbled.
+ Show Spoiler [Batman 3] +
On September 03 2010 06:54 bumatlarge wrote:
Bum was in the ZONE tonight. Nothing was gonna give him up or let him down, run around or desert him. He didnt have any beer or pot, his mind was clear as london on a not-so-foggy day. He saw his target house, and bee-lined for it. Man who lived in such a shitty house, everything was falling apart. So bum got into position and waited. And he kept waiting. After about 5 hours, he figured no one was coming and went to leave. He heard a loud crash in the house and immediately ran to the window. He saw three beautiful women in bikinis cooking in the kitchen.
"I think I've stumbled upon paradise. I don't think I can take it anymore, those huge juicy morsels on those sandwiches look delicious! Is that salmon on there?"
Suddenly the window gave way and bum fell into the kitchen. The girls looked confused, but they smiled and helped bum up and gave him a sandwich. It was salmon! And it was a nice place on the inside, alot of fung-shway
"Come into the courtyard" the girl said
"Uhhh i fink I should be going..." Bum said with his face stuffed
"Aw, I made a delicious milkshake there."
"Well a milkshake does sound good right now."
So after that milkshake brought bum to the yard, the girls started to eat alot of food on these tables out here. They were kneeling on the floor and the tables were very low.
"Really letting yourselves go tonight huh?"
"Well winter is coming up"
Suddenly it became clear to bum. The salmon and the eating and the winter and the bikinis. These were not women, they were bears. Suddenly the bears started to attack bum. Shit, pondered bum, those bears are starting to attack me. Oh bother. After a long intervention scene involving winnie the pooh, bum grabbed a jar of honey on one of the tables and smashed it on the ground. The bears diverted their attention to the honey and started eating and playing around in it.
"Time to get out of here!"
But a bear was blobking his path. The bear drew out a katana from a sheath on his belt. Suddenly it became clear to bum. The fwang shay and the tables and the katana. These were not bears, they were ninjas. Suddenly, ninjas, thousand of them were fluttering around the courtyard noiselessly. Oh poop. Think Bum THINK. He recalled having a handbook a long time ago, that depicted a list of things ninjas cant touch. Invisibility was one, but bum could not be invisible because that would be awesome. Hmmmm they cant catch you if you are fire, but bum didnt know how to harness the power of fire. There was one more that was actually relevant.... hmmmmmmmmmm.....
Oh yeah,
"IM THE GOD DAMN BATMAN." Bum batmanned.
The ninjas gasped but then stopped gasping.
"No you're not."
"YES I AM!"
"Nope."
"Uh what no yes i am?"
"Where is your mask?"
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU Bum's hand went to his face and the horror set in. He didn't bring his mask. Humiliated, Bum ran through the house and out the door. The sun was up.
"Shouldn't we catch him? He's not batman."
"The humiliation of thinking you are batman and not actually being batman is worse then anything we can do. Let him go."
Apparently ninjas can't catch you if you are insane.
Bum was in the ZONE tonight. Nothing was gonna give him up or let him down, run around or desert him. He didnt have any beer or pot, his mind was clear as london on a not-so-foggy day. He saw his target house, and bee-lined for it. Man who lived in such a shitty house, everything was falling apart. So bum got into position and waited. And he kept waiting. After about 5 hours, he figured no one was coming and went to leave. He heard a loud crash in the house and immediately ran to the window. He saw three beautiful women in bikinis cooking in the kitchen.
"I think I've stumbled upon paradise. I don't think I can take it anymore, those huge juicy morsels on those sandwiches look delicious! Is that salmon on there?"
Suddenly the window gave way and bum fell into the kitchen. The girls looked confused, but they smiled and helped bum up and gave him a sandwich. It was salmon! And it was a nice place on the inside, alot of fung-shway
"Come into the courtyard" the girl said
"Uhhh i fink I should be going..." Bum said with his face stuffed
"Aw, I made a delicious milkshake there."
"Well a milkshake does sound good right now."
So after that milkshake brought bum to the yard, the girls started to eat alot of food on these tables out here. They were kneeling on the floor and the tables were very low.
"Really letting yourselves go tonight huh?"
"Well winter is coming up"
Suddenly it became clear to bum. The salmon and the eating and the winter and the bikinis. These were not women, they were bears. Suddenly the bears started to attack bum. Shit, pondered bum, those bears are starting to attack me. Oh bother. After a long intervention scene involving winnie the pooh, bum grabbed a jar of honey on one of the tables and smashed it on the ground. The bears diverted their attention to the honey and started eating and playing around in it.
"Time to get out of here!"
But a bear was blobking his path. The bear drew out a katana from a sheath on his belt. Suddenly it became clear to bum. The fwang shay and the tables and the katana. These were not bears, they were ninjas. Suddenly, ninjas, thousand of them were fluttering around the courtyard noiselessly. Oh poop. Think Bum THINK. He recalled having a handbook a long time ago, that depicted a list of things ninjas cant touch. Invisibility was one, but bum could not be invisible because that would be awesome. Hmmmm they cant catch you if you are fire, but bum didnt know how to harness the power of fire. There was one more that was actually relevant.... hmmmmmmmmmm.....
Oh yeah,
"IM THE GOD DAMN BATMAN." Bum batmanned.
The ninjas gasped but then stopped gasping.
"No you're not."
"YES I AM!"
"Nope."
"Uh what no yes i am?"
"Where is your mask?"
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU Bum's hand went to his face and the horror set in. He didn't bring his mask. Humiliated, Bum ran through the house and out the door. The sun was up.
"Shouldn't we catch him? He's not batman."
"The humiliation of thinking you are batman and not actually being batman is worse then anything we can do. Let him go."
Apparently ninjas can't catch you if you are insane.
+ Show Spoiler [Batman 4] +
On September 04 2010 13:51 bumatlarge wrote:
*Man do I have to write another story? Maybe a story about what happened. And why is it that I always imagine the whackest scenarios. I wish I was a doctor, then no one would be dead from scum. Maybe I just lied about being watcher, and Im actually a godfather gunless mafia? Maybe I have AIDS? I am a bum. Why am I posting on this forum playing a game with all these strangers? WHAT AM I DOING?!*
Bum's head popped off his mossy log in a feverish sweat. Oh what a nightmare that was. He quickly grabbed his batman mask (cant forget that) and went off into the night!
After bum's convoluted dream, he actually thought he was a doctor for a moment. "If I was a doctor, who would I protect? Well obviously not citizen because then theyd just roleblock me if they were gonna hit him... And the only other viable person is bumatlarge, but hes such an awesome guy, why would I shoot him?" So bum went off to JeeJee's house to get some advice, because bum was pretty sure he was a super secret doctor. Or a malicious bastard.
On his way, bum was stopped by commissioner Gordon.
"Evening, com-mish-en-er"
"Who are you?"
"...I'm batman..."
"Oh you look, uh you cant ask JeeJee's advice on anything, it's against the rules."
"What im just paying a visit"
"Well then thats your visit"
"Can I talk to him then?'
"No"
"Can I pretend to talk to him in my story?"
"Uh what yeah sure I guess..."
"Awesome"
After outsmarting Ace- uh I mean commissioner Gordon, Bum waltzeded off to JeeJee's house completely ignoring everyones advice on who to watch.
GG had a big house, bum hoped to have a big house like that one day, or even a small house, or a house at all. Bum knew the routine hands down now, fall over the fence, and see how goes in out the backdoor. Bum never thought it strange that he never checked who went out and in the front door, because that was another citizen's job. Bum started to climb the fence but an alarm went off. Suddenly ninjas, thousands of them...
Bum's head popped off his pillow, and Leonardo DeCaprio was standing over him. "We need to go deeper."
Bum's head popped off his pillow. "Jesus Christ!"
"Yes?"
"Is this another dream?"
"Uh no, dont you have a job to do?"
"Oh yeah!"
TIME MACHINE
Bum was waiting in the bushes by JeeJee's back patio. OoOoO a patio thinks hes better then everyone hope he gets shot... BANG. CRASH. JeeJee flew out the window straight at bum. Before Bum realized what hit him.. JeeJee hit him right in the forehead. So it took bum a really long time to realize what him because Bum blacked out.
-
-
-
"DING DING DINGDINGDING! You're pokemon have been fully healed" Said Nurse Joy.
"wattttt?" Bum psyducked
"..wtf.." JeeJee drowzily uttered
"You are alive!" Bum chantsied!
"I am alive..." JeeJee mewtwo'd
"Not so fast."
Three guys in ridiculous costumes with funky hats and a large R on their chests were there so suddenly, that there is no adjective other then suddenly that can accurately depict how suddenly they were there.
"I find your lack of scuminess disturbing" One guy said who had a darth vader helmet on. And then he choked JeeJee to death.
"YOU BASTARD YOU KILLED JEEJEE."
"Yeah I know Im supposed to, thats how the game works."
"Oh I guess so..."
"Then you wouldn't mind me doing this" Nurse Joy said.
But it wasnt nurse joy it was A RANDOM RASTAFARIAN. POP. Right in the Darth helmet! Darth*insert random articles here* fell over and his comrades fled the scene.
"Aw JeeJee is dead..."
"He would have died anyway"
"What how?"
"I would have killed him."
"... Why?"
"I cant help it, its how the game works"
"Ok... then I guess I cant help but be batman?"
"Exactly"
"Nice"
Bum's head slowly rose from his pillow. Ace was standing over him.
"Uh sorry about that, you werent supposed to be hit..."
"Yeah but I saw all those people!"
"No you just had a crazy dream after you read my post. But you did mutter something about 3 guys throwing JeeJee out a window"
"Oh yeah, off the top of my head I remember the silouettes."
"Off the top of your head, JeeJee died!"
"HAHA ACE" Bum winked and pointed to ace with both fingers
Ace did a DK taunt from SSB, scratch the weird smoker cough noise
*Man do I have to write another story? Maybe a story about what happened. And why is it that I always imagine the whackest scenarios. I wish I was a doctor, then no one would be dead from scum. Maybe I just lied about being watcher, and Im actually a godfather gunless mafia? Maybe I have AIDS? I am a bum. Why am I posting on this forum playing a game with all these strangers? WHAT AM I DOING?!*
Bum's head popped off his mossy log in a feverish sweat. Oh what a nightmare that was. He quickly grabbed his batman mask (cant forget that) and went off into the night!
After bum's convoluted dream, he actually thought he was a doctor for a moment. "If I was a doctor, who would I protect? Well obviously not citizen because then theyd just roleblock me if they were gonna hit him... And the only other viable person is bumatlarge, but hes such an awesome guy, why would I shoot him?" So bum went off to JeeJee's house to get some advice, because bum was pretty sure he was a super secret doctor. Or a malicious bastard.
On his way, bum was stopped by commissioner Gordon.
"Evening, com-mish-en-er"
"Who are you?"
"...I'm batman..."
"Oh you look, uh you cant ask JeeJee's advice on anything, it's against the rules."
"What im just paying a visit"
"Well then thats your visit"
"Can I talk to him then?'
"No"
"Can I pretend to talk to him in my story?"
"Uh what yeah sure I guess..."
"Awesome"
After outsmarting Ace- uh I mean commissioner Gordon, Bum waltzeded off to JeeJee's house completely ignoring everyones advice on who to watch.
GG had a big house, bum hoped to have a big house like that one day, or even a small house, or a house at all. Bum knew the routine hands down now, fall over the fence, and see how goes in out the backdoor. Bum never thought it strange that he never checked who went out and in the front door, because that was another citizen's job. Bum started to climb the fence but an alarm went off. Suddenly ninjas, thousands of them...
Bum's head popped off his pillow, and Leonardo DeCaprio was standing over him. "We need to go deeper."
Bum's head popped off his pillow. "Jesus Christ!"
"Yes?"
"Is this another dream?"
"Uh no, dont you have a job to do?"
"Oh yeah!"
TIME MACHINE
Bum was waiting in the bushes by JeeJee's back patio. OoOoO a patio thinks hes better then everyone hope he gets shot... BANG. CRASH. JeeJee flew out the window straight at bum. Before Bum realized what hit him.. JeeJee hit him right in the forehead. So it took bum a really long time to realize what him because Bum blacked out.
-
-
-
"DING DING DINGDINGDING! You're pokemon have been fully healed" Said Nurse Joy.
"wattttt?" Bum psyducked
"..wtf.." JeeJee drowzily uttered
"You are alive!" Bum chantsied!
"I am alive..." JeeJee mewtwo'd
"Not so fast."
Three guys in ridiculous costumes with funky hats and a large R on their chests were there so suddenly, that there is no adjective other then suddenly that can accurately depict how suddenly they were there.
"I find your lack of scuminess disturbing" One guy said who had a darth vader helmet on. And then he choked JeeJee to death.
"YOU BASTARD YOU KILLED JEEJEE."
"Yeah I know Im supposed to, thats how the game works."
"Oh I guess so..."
"Then you wouldn't mind me doing this" Nurse Joy said.
But it wasnt nurse joy it was A RANDOM RASTAFARIAN. POP. Right in the Darth helmet! Darth*insert random articles here* fell over and his comrades fled the scene.
"Aw JeeJee is dead..."
"He would have died anyway"
"What how?"
"I would have killed him."
"... Why?"
"I cant help it, its how the game works"
"Ok... then I guess I cant help but be batman?"
"Exactly"
"Nice"
Bum's head slowly rose from his pillow. Ace was standing over him.
"Uh sorry about that, you werent supposed to be hit..."
"Yeah but I saw all those people!"
"No you just had a crazy dream after you read my post. But you did mutter something about 3 guys throwing JeeJee out a window"
"Oh yeah, off the top of my head I remember the silouettes."
"Off the top of your head, JeeJee died!"
"HAHA ACE" Bum winked and pointed to ace with both fingers
Ace did a DK taunt from SSB, scratch the weird smoker cough noise
+ Show Spoiler [Insane Vampire] +
On October 14 2010 14:35 bumatlarge wrote:
Bumatlarge was enjoying a nice slice of raw veal in His prison cell, remembering the good old days. His old cousin always made such a ruckus of Bum residing in that shabby attic, but he had gotten over that fact quite quickly when his first limb came off. 400 years later, a little bit after WWI, bum's vampiric physician diagnosed bum with YFI disorder, also known as 'your fuckin insane'. Traumatized, Bum went batshit crazy that night, flinging bat shit all over the place, and eating people. The Vampire order told bum this was unacceptable, one tastes the wine and spits it out, it was said, a lesson learned when in your early vampire years, along with dont run with wooden stakes. So for a good part of a century, poor bum was locked away forced to eat dead things. Alone. Yes, that's the key word, the most awful word in the English tongue. Murder doesn't hold a candle to it and hell is only a poor synonym. That made Bum have to pee. Rattling his chains away, he rose from his chair and went to the chamber pot in the corner, commencing his business... someone is here watching me pee, bum thought to himself, taking a silent whiff of the scent. The chains were strong, maybe the prey would misjudge the slack when he entered. It was definitely human, his caretaker was not, and had a little more... finesse in his step. This prey was blunt and quiet. The window. They left it nice and open. Bum licked his lips.
"Die monster, you don't belong in this world!"
"It was not by my han- oh how clever..."
Bum was still facing the other way, a nice full shadow of the visitor spoke volumes against the cell wall Bum was near. The moon was hospitable tonight.
"I will end you here and now."
Steps forward sounded.
"Very well then... HAVE AT Y-"
A stake sprouted from Bum's chest.
"Oh come on!"
"That was anticlimatic."
Before bum turned around, the hand he swung his arm behind him, but it dissipated to dust upon touching the man's neck.
"I thought I read your shadow perfectly."
"No thats a stain on the wall..."
"Oh I forgot my contacts! Dr. H, can I get another shot?"
An intercom sounded.
"Sorry Bum, you're dead."
"God damn..."
Bum was taking longer to fade away then he thought.
"Well this sucks"
"Before tonight I wasnt even sure vampires existed"
"Yeah they sure do, along with elves, gremlins and eskimos."
"Really?"
"Yeah"
Bum slowly evaporated into dust. But not before he started twinkling.
"FUCKING SERIOUS?!"
THE END
Bumatlarge was enjoying a nice slice of raw veal in His prison cell, remembering the good old days. His old cousin always made such a ruckus of Bum residing in that shabby attic, but he had gotten over that fact quite quickly when his first limb came off. 400 years later, a little bit after WWI, bum's vampiric physician diagnosed bum with YFI disorder, also known as 'your fuckin insane'. Traumatized, Bum went batshit crazy that night, flinging bat shit all over the place, and eating people. The Vampire order told bum this was unacceptable, one tastes the wine and spits it out, it was said, a lesson learned when in your early vampire years, along with dont run with wooden stakes. So for a good part of a century, poor bum was locked away forced to eat dead things. Alone. Yes, that's the key word, the most awful word in the English tongue. Murder doesn't hold a candle to it and hell is only a poor synonym. That made Bum have to pee. Rattling his chains away, he rose from his chair and went to the chamber pot in the corner, commencing his business... someone is here watching me pee, bum thought to himself, taking a silent whiff of the scent. The chains were strong, maybe the prey would misjudge the slack when he entered. It was definitely human, his caretaker was not, and had a little more... finesse in his step. This prey was blunt and quiet. The window. They left it nice and open. Bum licked his lips.
"Die monster, you don't belong in this world!"
"It was not by my han- oh how clever..."
Bum was still facing the other way, a nice full shadow of the visitor spoke volumes against the cell wall Bum was near. The moon was hospitable tonight.
"I will end you here and now."
Steps forward sounded.
"Very well then... HAVE AT Y-"
A stake sprouted from Bum's chest.
"Oh come on!"
"That was anticlimatic."
Before bum turned around, the hand he swung his arm behind him, but it dissipated to dust upon touching the man's neck.
"I thought I read your shadow perfectly."
"No thats a stain on the wall..."
"Oh I forgot my contacts! Dr. H, can I get another shot?"
An intercom sounded.
"Sorry Bum, you're dead."
"God damn..."
Bum was taking longer to fade away then he thought.
"Well this sucks"
"Before tonight I wasnt even sure vampires existed"
"Yeah they sure do, along with elves, gremlins and eskimos."
"Really?"
"Yeah"
Bum slowly evaporated into dust. But not before he started twinkling.
"FUCKING SERIOUS?!"
THE END
+ Show Spoiler [Batman 5] +
On January 17 2011 10:03 bumatlarge wrote:
AHEM, almost forgot.
Night 1.
Batman was feeling frisky tonight. A night on the town would do him some good. He gets his mask and detective kit and flies into the night!
Bum decided Kenpachi was his first visit. Bum needed to get those upper classmen to pay for taking his top draft role (CURSE REBIRTH AND ALL OF HIS SMURF). Bum fondly remembers going all hero on LoR for claiming vanilla after attempting to take traitor. Bum was like if Rorschach and Gargamel had a baby. Bum reached Kenpachi's house and decided to go on the front Porsche. He Forded the fence with both Hondas the rails and leaped over despite his Chevy muscles. He peeked into the windows and saw darkness. A Jack of the trades would be busy in the situation town was in. After whisper shouting "ROLE COP!" , Bum head butted the glass. His sharp wit made the glass dissipate without a sound. Awesome doesn't make a sound. And Batman is awesome so.
Bum crept through the house, as he had express permission by Ace to actually trespass an look through stuff. Bum was tinkering around and saw a lot of incriminating stuff. Mario mustaches, glasses the size of large coins (which is average for glasses) and assorted Italian cuisine. "Well maybe Jack is an Italian name."
Bum heard a noise from the other room. He Snickered as something less awesome made it's presence known. Kenpachi for certain. Bum snuck into the chamber. First thing, Kenpachi was extraordinarily fat. Uncountable Mounds of fatness. He also noticed 100Grand on the table, and also about hundred thousand dollars on the table. A picture on the wall with Kenachi shaking Babe Ruth's hand. This guy had his roots deep, I mean no one has that much hair. He also seemed to have connections. This must be the mafia crimelord. But Bum must have also gotten tricked into coming here. Bum was gonna try to sneak out, when he heard footsteps. Thinking on his feet, Bum quickly turned his attention away from his shoes and ran behind the Bossman , taking off his mask.
2 Thugs walked in with guns pointing at some fellas. One of them looked at Bum and said "RaRaRee, I spy a townie" but a thug kicked him in the knee. Persistent, the guy said "RaRaRass, no really that guy ain't mafia!" The thug proceeded to kick him in the other knee. "Don't talk to Tony that way!"
Kenpachi told them a muffled phrase, that Bum assumed was "Take em to the mattresses" Bum guessed those guys were about to be raped anally or something, and Bum being a massive homophobe, used his homophobe powers to teleport outside away from awkward gay situations.
"That was gay and awkward"
EDIT: Then Bum walked down the driveway and saw all these police officers preparing for a sting blahblahblah bum realized it wasn't really the mafia GF as far as town thought. Well that sucks
I started writing it after night 1 but then the GF claims started happening, so I thought I'd save this claim for later. I guess I'll write the night 2 one later... I have plans!
AHEM, almost forgot.
Night 1.
Batman was feeling frisky tonight. A night on the town would do him some good. He gets his mask and detective kit and flies into the night!
Bum decided Kenpachi was his first visit. Bum needed to get those upper classmen to pay for taking his top draft role (CURSE REBIRTH AND ALL OF HIS SMURF). Bum fondly remembers going all hero on LoR for claiming vanilla after attempting to take traitor. Bum was like if Rorschach and Gargamel had a baby. Bum reached Kenpachi's house and decided to go on the front Porsche. He Forded the fence with both Hondas the rails and leaped over despite his Chevy muscles. He peeked into the windows and saw darkness. A Jack of the trades would be busy in the situation town was in. After whisper shouting "ROLE COP!" , Bum head butted the glass. His sharp wit made the glass dissipate without a sound. Awesome doesn't make a sound. And Batman is awesome so.
Bum crept through the house, as he had express permission by Ace to actually trespass an look through stuff. Bum was tinkering around and saw a lot of incriminating stuff. Mario mustaches, glasses the size of large coins (which is average for glasses) and assorted Italian cuisine. "Well maybe Jack is an Italian name."
Bum heard a noise from the other room. He Snickered as something less awesome made it's presence known. Kenpachi for certain. Bum snuck into the chamber. First thing, Kenpachi was extraordinarily fat. Uncountable Mounds of fatness. He also noticed 100Grand on the table, and also about hundred thousand dollars on the table. A picture on the wall with Kenachi shaking Babe Ruth's hand. This guy had his roots deep, I mean no one has that much hair. He also seemed to have connections. This must be the mafia crimelord. But Bum must have also gotten tricked into coming here. Bum was gonna try to sneak out, when he heard footsteps. Thinking on his feet, Bum quickly turned his attention away from his shoes and ran behind the Bossman , taking off his mask.
2 Thugs walked in with guns pointing at some fellas. One of them looked at Bum and said "RaRaRee, I spy a townie" but a thug kicked him in the knee. Persistent, the guy said "RaRaRass, no really that guy ain't mafia!" The thug proceeded to kick him in the other knee. "Don't talk to Tony that way!"
Kenpachi told them a muffled phrase, that Bum assumed was "Take em to the mattresses" Bum guessed those guys were about to be raped anally or something, and Bum being a massive homophobe, used his homophobe powers to teleport outside away from awkward gay situations.
"That was gay and awkward"
EDIT: Then Bum walked down the driveway and saw all these police officers preparing for a sting blahblahblah bum realized it wasn't really the mafia GF as far as town thought. Well that sucks
I started writing it after night 1 but then the GF claims started happening, so I thought I'd save this claim for later. I guess I'll write the night 2 one later... I have plans!
+ Show Spoiler [Batman 6] +
On January 20 2011 08:23 bumatlarge wrote:
BUM BUM BAAAAAAA
-tman
Along the nside border of Philedelphia, a child spawned and grew up. He spent a majority of his life on the public entertainment facility. He led a somber life that one might consider chill. He was playing basketball when a few evil-looking fellows proceeded to perform some misdemeanors. Bum skirmished with said thugs and his mother fret, so he vacated the premises to Eiii's crib.
Bum was gonna check this out right quick. In and out. He saw the Vowel abuser's abode unobtrusively open for altercations. He saw a mail carrier walking up the steps, so Bum snuck up behind him and grabbed a letter and waited below the stairs, while the postman was none-the-wiser. Mr. Psotman, being a jovial fellow, rang the bell, and the door started to open.
"Good evening sir! I thought I'd hand you your mail...."
Bum peaked up and saw the mailman was frozen with that grin wiped off his face.
"Here, take your mail."
Before that nut decided he would go postal, Bum ran up the stairs.
"Oh, you dropped a letter..."
Bum can't really explain what happened, and neither can I. You know the phrase 'dead-pan'? Well Eiii was more of a murdered-pot. There was literally no emotion in that face. In fact, you couldn't stare directly at it, because your stare would glance off it on to something else, like some subconcious reaction that feared you would get sucked into the abyss of that man's face.
"Uh, your Eiii?"
"Yes, my name is Eiii."
"Well uh here is a letter."
The mailman was already halfway down the block. Eiii didn't answer. Maybe he fell asleep. Bum couldn't tell. He just stared at other stuff, everything but Eiii. Suddenly,
"Goodbye."
And Eiii shut the door. Bum still had the letter in his hand, so he just dropped it on the mat. Bum peaked into the window, and saw that Godforsaken thing sitting on a chair watching TV. The TV was off of course. He was just sitting there being useless. Existing. It seemed pretty clear to Bum that this guy did not have a role. He'd a make great SK though. Then Bum drove past BC's house and knocked over his mailbox.
BUM BUM BAAAAAAA
-tman
Along the nside border of Philedelphia, a child spawned and grew up. He spent a majority of his life on the public entertainment facility. He led a somber life that one might consider chill. He was playing basketball when a few evil-looking fellows proceeded to perform some misdemeanors. Bum skirmished with said thugs and his mother fret, so he vacated the premises to Eiii's crib.
Bum was gonna check this out right quick. In and out. He saw the Vowel abuser's abode unobtrusively open for altercations. He saw a mail carrier walking up the steps, so Bum snuck up behind him and grabbed a letter and waited below the stairs, while the postman was none-the-wiser. Mr. Psotman, being a jovial fellow, rang the bell, and the door started to open.
"Good evening sir! I thought I'd hand you your mail...."
Bum peaked up and saw the mailman was frozen with that grin wiped off his face.
"Here, take your mail."
Before that nut decided he would go postal, Bum ran up the stairs.
"Oh, you dropped a letter..."
Bum can't really explain what happened, and neither can I. You know the phrase 'dead-pan'? Well Eiii was more of a murdered-pot. There was literally no emotion in that face. In fact, you couldn't stare directly at it, because your stare would glance off it on to something else, like some subconcious reaction that feared you would get sucked into the abyss of that man's face.
"Uh, your Eiii?"
"Yes, my name is Eiii."
"Well uh here is a letter."
The mailman was already halfway down the block. Eiii didn't answer. Maybe he fell asleep. Bum couldn't tell. He just stared at other stuff, everything but Eiii. Suddenly,
"Goodbye."
And Eiii shut the door. Bum still had the letter in his hand, so he just dropped it on the mat. Bum peaked into the window, and saw that Godforsaken thing sitting on a chair watching TV. The TV was off of course. He was just sitting there being useless. Existing. It seemed pretty clear to Bum that this guy did not have a role. He'd a make great SK though. Then Bum drove past BC's house and knocked over his mailbox.
+ Show Spoiler [~OpZ~] +
29) You are ~OpZ~ and you have the desire to post. What do you do?
a) Respond to every post one by one and get banned by Plexa for spamming a few dozen posts in a row. Ignore his five warnings because you still had to respond to the next 5 pages of posts before seeing the warnings.
b) Constantly edit every post against the rules instead of making another so you don't get banned for spamming.
c) vigi rol after he lynches a mafia. Why not?
d) Congratulations, you have brought into the elite town circle off of a faulty plan. Voraciously criticize anyone who says the town circle sucks. Don't worry about giving away the fact that you're a key tracker in it, make sure nobody can attack your holy circle without receiving a tongue lashing and a threat to be lynched.
e) Berate everyone who doesn't share your opinion as sheep.
+ Show Spoiler [Jugan] +
30) You are Jugan. Wait who? Why are you on this quiz?
Note that Citizen has 4/5 mafia right.
Repeat 3x more. People still listen to citizen.
Oh game ended and citizen is proved right? Well don't let that stop you!
Was once not enough? Do it again in your next game!
+ Show Spoiler [Bloodyc0bbler] +
31) You are Bloodyc0bbler hosting a game with clues. What do you use for clues?
a) one word which shows up in the first google hit on the user's name
b) "the killer hit his victim with a long object"
c) "fighting!" when there are at least 4 users with "fighting" or "hwaiting" in their profiles
d)
-Pyrrhuloxia on Bloodyc0bbler's clues.
e) Ver tells you pregame to make him town because he has finals and doesn't have the time to be mafia. Okay. Qatol says the same thing, great. What to do? Hmm how about putting them as godfathers!
f) You decide to use code names to help the town identify the mafia members! Stargate seems like a good place to get code names! But those names are so hard to spell! No matter!
Day 2:
Anubus
Camulous
Chronus
Yu
Day 3:
Ameratsu
Aphophis
Aries
Chronus
Seth
Yu
Day 4:
Apophis
Camulus
Hathor
Kali
Day 5:
Anubus
Amaterasu
Camulus
Hathor
Kali
Day 6:
Chronus
Sokar
g) You are mafia and the game originally has hidden role counts. However, Foolishness suggested it be changed to open setup and Bill Murray obeyed him. In addition, he put "I am running this solely for foolishness" in the OP. What do you do? Revenge! Foolishness gets shot night 1.
h) Save the town from an SK leading them astray. Get shot by the vigilante. Thankfully, he was roleblocked by a medic. Lynch the traitor. Get shot by the vigilante. Luckily he was roleblocked again!
j) Smurf and act like a possessed Chezinu channeling 0cz3c. Spout so much nonsense that Pyrrhuloxia is convinced you are smurfing as him. Prove him right by slipping up on day 2.
+ Show Spoiler [Decafchicken] +
32) You are Decafchicken and are suspected of being mafia, again. Why?
a) A mafia is having a last supper before execution. This may or may not be an actual clue. Does it matter? He is also having coffee. What is DecafChicken's name again? Oh that's right, lynch Decaf.
b) The word coffee is in the day post. Lynch Decaf
c) The chicken ran across the road. Lynch Decaf.
d) There is a vague reference that may refer to a mafia eating possibly. Lynch Decaf.
*Funny note: Decaf was mafia each time but those weren't real clues.*
+ Show Spoiler [LSB] +
33) You are the one and only LSB. What do you do?
a) You are the serial killer. What's your plan?
1- Pre-game create a convoluted plan that gives the mafia and serial killer who has exactly what role.
2- Proceed to get plan attacked by every good player not playing the game.
3- Game starts. No good players are in the game? Check. Okay going to push my plan.
4- What's that? Everyone good dissed it pre-game? Psht WHATEVA. Reveal all your roles to me!!
6- Don't follow your own plan. Almost get away with it until an insane townie picks the (extremely terrible) role at 2nd pick you assigned yourself and claims it!
b) You are cohosting a game with Node and want to stir some things up. Hmm, why not post in the thread that a major suspect in a complicated situation should check his PM's. All hell ensues.
d) Mafia want to roleblock the mayor night 3. Tell them it is against the rules. Fast forward to night 5. Mafia want to roleblock the mayor. Tell them you changed your mind and it's okay. Town loses their key bodyguard and mayor.
e) Tell the mafia the mayor is a medic because you thought he roleclaimed publically.
f) Did the mafia forget to send in their hits? Don't worry, you can do it for them! You already actively post in their forum, so why not? It's okay though, you clean up your act in the next game you host.
g) Advertise youself as a "proven scumhunter." Only lynch scum based upon the analysis and actions of others. Vigi hit an innocent.
+ Show Spoiler [Attackzerg] +
34) You are Attackzerg. And what do Attackzergs do?
a) You do not like Ace and want to see him dead. But Ace is a broken veteran and is essentially invincible. So what? Get RebirthofLegend to suicide bomb him. He doesn't want to? WTF? The Mafia don't want him to? IMPOSSIBLE. Ragequit out of mafia chat. Immediately give yourself away in the thread when you were under no suspicion.
b) Your role in the mafia team is to put suspicion on ace. How do you do that? Blame Ace for not being a god and knowing who the mafia shoots.
Not working? Is Ace's circle gaining too much power over the town. No problem. Create another (entirely public) town circle on the merit that Ace sucks. Aww crap, you only have one willing member of your circle, a medic? That's okay, just add some mafia buddies to it so it looks legit, then shoot the medic. Make sure all members pour out anti-Ace rhetoric every post.
The end result once you die?
c) Ace is your Godfather and is under suspicion? Check. Tell the town two detectives claimed to you, on day 1 no less, that Ver is mafia. Nobody buys it? Don't worry,
d) Ver is your Mole? Check.
e) Note, you are already dead (having suicide bombed Ace):
![[image loading]](http://kuvaton.com/kuvei/double_fail.jpeg)
*The vote riggers rigged the lynch for RoL to die*
+ Show Spoiler [Nemy] +
35) You are NemY. You have just received the Detective role! What do you do?
1) Run for Mayor
2) Roleclaim Detective because you are afraid you might have just revealed your role in PM (to the other Detective)
3)
![[image loading]](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v434/Vroomfondel/nemy.jpg)
4) When the host screws up and confirms you as a Detective to the other Detective, proceed to not believe his roleclaim.
+ Show Spoiler [Annul] +
You are Annul.
a) Win your first game. Put your glorious 1-0 record in your profile. Start losing a lot of games. Quit updating and remove your record from your quote.
b) Congratulations, the thread reached 86 pages in the first day. Why? Because some people didn't like your idea, so you made them like it!
c) Get accused of not knowing about harry potter after someone didn't like the game you hosted. Shut them down, hard.
On December 23 2010 08:28 annul wrote:
im the president of quidditch at UF, my college's IQA team.
this is a picture of me (on the right):
![[image loading]](http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs827.snc4/68740_466637941984_710566984_5634329_3030032_n.jpg)
thats how much
On December 23 2010 08:22 orgolove wrote:
... Not sure how much you've read HP
... Not sure how much you've read HP
im the president of quidditch at UF, my college's IQA team.
this is a picture of me (on the right):
thats how much
+ Show Spoiler [Mafia couples] +
Best Mafia couple?
a) Ace/L
- Redtooth
b) Ace/Versatile
c) MafiaAreJerks/Lucia
d) Qatol/Dreamflower
e) Qatol/Ver
f) Korynne/LSB
g) Incognito/Flamewheel
h) Foolishness/Bill Murray
i) Bloodyc0bbler/Scaramanga
j) Pandain/LSB
k) Ace/Bill Murray
l) LTT/Chuiu
m) L/Bill Murray
n) RebirthofLegend/Annul
o) Pevergreen/totalwar.org mafia
+ Show Spoiler [Mix and Match!] +
People:
0) Pandain
1) Citizen
2) Chaoser
3) JeeJee
4) Plexa
5) Dr.Dragoon
6) Shallow[bay]
7) GeneralStan
8) Bumatlarge
9) Chezinu <3 Mikeymoo
10) Dreamflower
11) Kenpachi
Events or Quotes:
a) lets blow this taco stand
b) I'o'no man, U surez ur tail be dift AFTa we piks da' pigz??!?
c) Totally off topic but did you guys know scientists figured out weed-derivatives makes you less anxious??? GENIUS, I wonder how they figured that one out...lol (they actually did a lot of testing and it's kinda exciting result but still...)
"CB1 cannabinoid receptors mediate anxiolytic effects: convergent genetic and pharmacological evidence with CB1-specific agents" - Posted in the voting thread.
d) You are a medic and you want to be part of a town circle too. You have two options, join a town circle with a vet, vigi, and DT who have successfully outted a mafia. Or, join the new group in town whose goal is to tell the first circle they suck. What do you do? Join the new guys naturally! Guess what, with you there are 4 people. The other three are just mafia!
e) You are a detective and you want the mayor dead. Cluecheck the Mayor. He comes up clean. Ah that's good enough anwyays. Post in the thread that you know the Mayor is dirty because a cluecheck came up red. Push for his lynch and ignore someone who figured out the mafia team. Town lynches 1 mafia out of 6 and loses.
f) Edit an old post of yours in the liquibet forum with every blue of the town circle listed in it. A dead mafia magically finds it by searching his name and tells his buddies. The town proceeds to lose every blue over the next 3 days.
g) Defend your claims of photoshopping PM's with a....picture!
![[image loading]](http://img229.imageshack.us/img229/2642/applicationsyt1.png)
h) You have been accused of being mafia with this (fabricated) PM. What is your defense?
![[image loading]](http://img229.imageshack.us/img229/3694/sillymafiafj7.png)
i) Everything is good, you've made 60 posts in the first day, a vote, and you're a great contributing member of the town with fantastic logic like "Frankly, if somebody starts making sense, you should probably lynch him." But wait a moment, something isn't right here!
j) Be the runner up in 3 lynches and under intense scrutiny for 150 pages in the thread. But in the end of a 44 person game, you are the sole survivor. Mafia wins!
k) The town has accused you of being mafia. You don't like that. What do you do? Bump them all down in the queue and put everyone close to death. The mafia activate an ability to flip the queue and everyone dies, mafia wins on day 2. How do you react? You laugh. Laugh, laugh some more, and taunt the town for going for you.
l) "My scumlist looks like a christmas tree getting smashed against a rainbow. I think you are like an ultraviolet ray bouncing off a particularly gaudy-looking ornament."
m)
o) Figure out all 4 mafia day 2. Plant 2 bombs on them and die night 2, exploding both mafia. Never push mafia, or anyone for that matter, in the thread because you didn't think you were right.
p)
r)
s) Know that Tricode is a vigilante, Bloodyc0bbler is godfather, and chaoser is townie. Now look carefully at the picture.
![[image loading]](http://i26.tinypic.com/8wcc34.png)
There can be more than 1 answer per person
![[image loading]](http://img178.imageshack.us/img178/5919/lolrolgf7.jpg)
