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Have you ever been caught jacking off? - Page 22

Forum Index > General Forum
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Sephy90
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States1785 Posts
May 06 2010 08:38 GMT
#421
On May 06 2010 17:29 SC2Phoenix wrote:
Oh man will never watch a Day9 daily the same xD

after reading that story, it's great to know how open he can be lol
"So I turned the lights off at night and practiced by myself"
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
May 06 2010 16:16 GMT
#422
Do cumstains on the monitor serve as good memorabilia?
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
nicoaldo
Profile Joined March 2009
Argentina939 Posts
May 06 2010 16:57 GMT
#423
LOL Day`s story so fucking funny
Yaros
Profile Joined April 2010
Australia48 Posts
May 06 2010 17:35 GMT
#424
Never been caught, but contributing the shakeweight to this thread:
[image loading]
Fear is a product of imagination.
Ian Ian Ian
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
915 Posts
May 06 2010 17:46 GMT
#425
On May 06 2010 15:08 Bub wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 20 2008 04:59 GunsofthePatriots wrote:
On July 19 2008 10:35 YanGpaN wrote:
Serious question here, have you ever been caught jacking off? Do you remember where, and what did the other person say?

I'd like to openly admit that yes i've been caught.
When i was like 12 years old, i was sleeping on the same king sized mattress as my dad, then he started feeling the bed tremble, and he never really addressed the issue to me directly, but i sorta knew that he knew.
[image loading]

Poll: Have you been caught jacking off?
(Vote): Yes
(Vote): no
(Vote): I dont jack off



what the fuck?

you jacked off when you were in the same bed as your dad?

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?


thats nothing

try fingering your sister while BOTH parents are asleep on the same bed.


You realize you have to tell the story now
Sonnet
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Ireland39 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-06 19:15:41
May 06 2010 19:14 GMT
#426
As I sat curled to a foetal ball,
I watch the girls scroll 'cross my screen,
I hear a noise, a scrape 'gainst the wall,
And mouth hangs open, silent scream

Slowly now the door swings wide,
A softly upward ringing creak,
I try in vain, my crotch to hide,
Then hear my mother's rising shriek

Not thinking now I slam shut my laptop,
And try too hard, square it between us,
Shut too fast and too late, can't stop,
I close my laptop, on my penis

So I would stake my life upon it,
This my most embarrassing sonnet
The greatest burden a man must bear is choosing being understood over metrical footing :(
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
May 06 2010 20:10 GMT
#427
On May 07 2010 04:14 Sonnet wrote:
As I sat curled to a foetal ball,
I watch the girls scroll 'cross my screen,
I hear a noise, a scrape 'gainst the wall,
And mouth hangs open, silent scream

Slowly now the door swings wide,
A softly upward ringing creak,
I try in vain, my crotch to hide,
Then hear my mother's rising shriek

Not thinking now I slam shut my laptop,
And try too hard, square it between us,
Shut too fast and too late, can't stop,
I close my laptop, on my penis

So I would stake my life upon it,
This my most embarrassing sonnet


Creative. You write all your posts in sonnets?
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
Sephy90
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States1785 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-06 20:14:04
May 06 2010 20:13 GMT
#428
On May 07 2010 02:35 Yaros wrote:
Never been caught, but contributing the shakeweight to this thread:
[image loading]

i always wanna shake my head to this commercial, and i can't help but smile LOL
the smiles on their faces are priceless
"So I turned the lights off at night and practiced by myself"
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-06 20:19:08
May 06 2010 20:17 GMT
#429
On May 07 2010 05:13 Sephy69 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 07 2010 02:35 Yaros wrote:
Never been caught, but contributing the shakeweight to this thread:
[image loading]

i always wanna shake my head to this commercial, and i can't help but smile LOL
the smiles on their faces are priceless


When you watch the whole commercial it's even funnier...

"Scientists at a prestigious California university..."


EDIT: WOOOT 250th post for a Zealot!
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
Sephy90
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States1785 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-06 20:22:48
May 06 2010 20:22 GMT
#430
On May 07 2010 05:17 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 07 2010 05:13 Sephy69 wrote:
On May 07 2010 02:35 Yaros wrote:
Never been caught, but contributing the shakeweight to this thread:
[image loading]

i always wanna shake my head to this commercial, and i can't help but smile LOL
the smiles on their faces are priceless


When you watch the whole commercial it's even funnier...

"Scientists at a prestigious California university..."


EDIT: WOOOT 250th post for a Zealot!

I just watched it oh man they have some toned ass arms from that thing LOL
"You also get this easy DVD! Which shows you how much you can do with the Shakeweight!"
fucking lol

edit: hahaha congratulations!
"So I turned the lights off at night and practiced by myself"
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
May 06 2010 20:23 GMT
#431
On May 07 2010 05:22 Sephy69 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 07 2010 05:17 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:
On May 07 2010 05:13 Sephy69 wrote:
On May 07 2010 02:35 Yaros wrote:
Never been caught, but contributing the shakeweight to this thread:
[image loading]

i always wanna shake my head to this commercial, and i can't help but smile LOL
the smiles on their faces are priceless


When you watch the whole commercial it's even funnier...

"Scientists at a prestigious California university..."


EDIT: WOOOT 250th post for a Zealot!

I just watched it oh man they have some toned ass arms from that thing LOL
"You also get this easy DVD! Which shows you how much you can do with the Shakeweight!"
fucking lol

edit: hahaha congratulations!


Why buy one for $19.95 and all those hidden fees? I have one that you can rent for 99c an hour!
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
L_Master
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States8017 Posts
May 06 2010 20:43 GMT
#432
On May 07 2010 02:46 Ian Ian Ian wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 06 2010 15:08 Bub wrote:
On July 20 2008 04:59 GunsofthePatriots wrote:
On July 19 2008 10:35 YanGpaN wrote:
Serious question here, have you ever been caught jacking off? Do you remember where, and what did the other person say?

I'd like to openly admit that yes i've been caught.
When i was like 12 years old, i was sleeping on the same king sized mattress as my dad, then he started feeling the bed tremble, and he never really addressed the issue to me directly, but i sorta knew that he knew.
[image loading]

Poll: Have you been caught jacking off?
(Vote): Yes
(Vote): no
(Vote): I dont jack off



what the fuck?

you jacked off when you were in the same bed as your dad?

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?


thats nothing

try fingering your sister while BOTH parents are asleep on the same bed.


You realize you have to tell the story now


Pretty much this. Thats wierd as hell man.
EffOrt and Soulkey Hwaiting!
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
May 06 2010 20:51 GMT
#433
On May 07 2010 05:43 L_Master wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 07 2010 02:46 Ian Ian Ian wrote:
On May 06 2010 15:08 Bub wrote:
On July 20 2008 04:59 GunsofthePatriots wrote:
On July 19 2008 10:35 YanGpaN wrote:
Serious question here, have you ever been caught jacking off? Do you remember where, and what did the other person say?

I'd like to openly admit that yes i've been caught.
When i was like 12 years old, i was sleeping on the same king sized mattress as my dad, then he started feeling the bed tremble, and he never really addressed the issue to me directly, but i sorta knew that he knew.
[image loading]

Poll: Have you been caught jacking off?
(Vote): Yes
(Vote): no
(Vote): I dont jack off



what the fuck?

you jacked off when you were in the same bed as your dad?

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?


thats nothing

try fingering your sister while BOTH parents are asleep on the same bed.


You realize you have to tell the story now


Pretty much this. Thats wierd as hell man.


I demand to know the story for my entertainment!
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
sharkeyanti
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States1273 Posts
May 06 2010 21:30 GMT
#434
On May 06 2010 14:57 TheAntZ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 06 2010 14:47 Sephy69 wrote:
On May 06 2010 14:45 OneFierceZealot wrote:
lol omg some of these are hilarious, ive never been caught, thank god. but honestly some of you guys go twice a day? lol... maybe once a week for me. actually fuck it im going to see how long i can go...

oh god on a bad day, 2 is nowhere near enough, maybe like 4-6 would be good, but of course i don't do it that much everyday... every other day though yeah rofl. no way in hell i could last a week without doing it, i've tried it and when i gave in i think i did it 8 times or so

lol, speaking of this
I once went an entire 2 weeks without fapping, and when I finally did, i kept holding it back
I jacked till i was on the brink and then i stopped
I did that like... i dont remember exactly but at least 20ish times
and then when i finally started going FULL SPEED AHEAD, fapping with as much power and speed as i could muster. This was on the bed, so my dick was aimed straight up, and when i finally came, the cum hit the ceiling. I was so surprised I just stared at it and then it dripped on me
feelsbadman


Once you get past a few weeks, you can go months.
Hi Mom
Emon_
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
3925 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-07 09:27:28
May 06 2010 21:46 GMT
#435
Maybe we should start a TL no fap challenge?
"I know that human beings and fish can coexist peacefully" -GWB ||
XazXio
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States356 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-05-06 21:55:15
May 06 2010 21:49 GMT
#436
uh ive been caught twice both by my mom. 2 times realy close with my dad. including last night.

first time i was on the far side of my bed that if i dove down on the side i was sitting on you couldnt see me from the door. so im doing my thing then i hear the door knob turn im like shit.
i dive on the ground as fast as i can, i mean like zealot leg speed fast i dove on that ground fast. i dont know if she saw anything that time but she asked what are you doing on the floor. i perked my head up barly over my bed like a poor mole on the wack a mole games and the best thing i could think of was, " I fell." took me a minute before i relized how stupid that was i fell like the worst escuse ever.

2nd time this one was a lot worse. i was by my closet this time. after the first time of going im going to cover myself better this time so i had a blanket just in case. and this blanket probably had countless cum stains on it from when i previously had beaten it and i used the blanket as a landing pad for the millions-billions of sperms to parashoot on. so im sitting down closet is open because thats where i got blanket from. mom turns handle im like fucckkk. i just went screw my damn pants and grabbed the blanket. now this time i know she didnt see anything but when you hunched over giving a stained blanket the biggest bear hug you have ever seen someone give you sort of get the picture of whats going on. this time i said, " I'm not ready." and she walked out. after she left i looked at the closet looked down relized i just crawled out of bed and i wasnt wearing any clothes before. so i shove the blanket back in my closet, put on some underwear and shorts and laid in my bed for about 20 minutes curled up next to my cat, untill my mom came in again.

Last night. this time i was in computer room before my parrents got home. i was constiplating about it going should i? i finaly went to do it. i had everything set up, towel, porn video going, dick in left hand, check. i get right ready first pull i hear the front door opening. im like shitttt. so i close out the video and turned off comp screen, and pulled pants up and walked out with a horazontal tent leading the way. and i go to the bathroom lock the door and sit there for a minute to think. i let my boner set, i get out go to the door where i dropped my backpack off and put it in the computer room and hit the power button on computer. and go into my room. i come back later that night to comp and go phew, as he had not checked comp history yet.

about a year ago i was doing it in my parrents room. i dont know what i guess for an adventure or w/e. and im doing it im compleatly naked, pants arnt around ankles or anything. (HUGE TIP: always do it with pants around ankles, always.) i hear movment in my house, my dad got back. i kick my clothes under thier bed and run into thier bathroom. im sitting going fuck im naked in thier bathroom, my dad is walking around the house, and my clothes are in thier room. then i heard him go into his room going shit shit shit, he left im just thank goddd. i sneak open the door crawl on my belly to my pants under the bed grab my cloths slither back and lock the door to the bathroom. after siting for a minute to rest my balls that probably just formed calluses on them from dragging them across the floor while putting all my wieght on them i got an idea. put clothes on so i did. flush toilet, so i did. and walked out into living room. my dad goes why you use my bathroom? i say that because we had two differant toilet seats i wanted to compare the two to see which molds to my ass the best.

scarrry stuff getting caught by your parrents, friends brothers sisters would be a lot less wierd than your parrents.... and they never let me finish...
How does food become poo?
Sephy90
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States1785 Posts
May 06 2010 22:56 GMT
#437
On May 07 2010 06:46 Emon_ wrote:
Not fapping ups your body's testosterone, meaning increased muscle growth, alertness etc. Back when I was into bodybuilding I only fapped once a month, when I couldn't take the abstinence anymore. I always had energy to spare and if I was busy all day I didn't even think twice about it. It was harder being home alone, but even that became easier after a while. The benefits are clearly there, though its hard. Maybe we should start a TL no fap challenge?

i don't like this challenge, because i would automatically lose as i began
"So I turned the lights off at night and practiced by myself"
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
May 06 2010 23:17 GMT
#438
On May 07 2010 06:46 Emon_ wrote:
Not fapping ups your body's testosterone, meaning increased muscle growth, alertness etc. Back when I was into bodybuilding I only fapped once a month, when I couldn't take the abstinence anymore. I always had energy to spare and if I was busy all day I didn't even think twice about it. It was harder being home alone, but even that became easier after a while. The benefits are clearly there, though its hard. Maybe we should start a TL no fap challenge?


If fapping is anything like sex, it barely lowers your testosterone, the gap being small enough that you can call bullshit on a football coach's "No sex before the big game" maxim. Aside from that, masturbation lowers the risk of prostate cancer if done on a regular basis, and in Europe, scientists are actually going to teenagers in school and urging them to masturbate at least once a day.


+ Show Spoiler +
By the standards of European science I am a healthy boy.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
FonzeXD
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States220 Posts
May 06 2010 23:17 GMT
#439
I've had my near misses and one time my pants were all the way down but I just yelled and said "wtf privacy I'm changing!!", but there was this one time I was really getting into the porno...

and it was some hot lesbo group action..

and then.. I couldn't resist so I turned the speakers up, lied on my bed(which is a few feet away), started to feel around and then when I was about to bust a nut, RIGHT at that moment where the pleasure waves are hitting you over and over, my sister is walking up the stairs and I can't really do anything to stop it...

FUCK!! xD
If I take you for granted, if I fuck up the planet, ain't nothing to it, gangsta rap made me do it.
JustSoPro
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States8 Posts
May 06 2010 23:19 GMT
#440
I just got caught reading the thread have you ever got caught jacking off.... Now my dad wont speak to me
Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty.
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