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Wat. Kennigit white? I always thought I saw pics somewhere which showed you as asian. qq.
On January 08 2012 20:11 squattincassanova wrote:Show nested quote +On January 08 2012 11:33 Kennigit wrote:I'm white as fuck. I actually lost count and i don't really put much value in numbers of girls i dated/slept with - the value is in the experience. I've done online dating for ..3 years i guess. I've met...probably ~100 girls. On January 08 2012 11:03 Release wrote:^^^^THE OFFICIAL GUIDE TO ONLINE DATING FOR TLERS
wtf is this? I'm terrible with social interaction w/anyone, but even i'm not desperate enough for this kind of thing This attitude is why you are not getting laid. 100 lays in 3 years is close to almost a new lay every ten days. You RLY this good? And this was without practicing mainstream pickup or with? I noticed with PlentyofFish /OKcupid, its a LOT of the same girls on all the time, unless you are gaming far ass chicks. If I work on game full time, I can probably get a lay every week like if I quit my job, but since I am working 2 jobs and only going out 2 nights a week, I'm averaging a lay every 3 weeks.
Wait, a lay every two weeks? With your volume? You must either fuck up somewhere or organize your girls terribly (I actually assume this).
For me when I was "on the hunt" in my first pickup year it went like this:
Go out Thu, Fr, Sat (+streetgame on free saturday afternoons). Make about 5-6 sets each. Since I didn't really aim for SNLs when I started out I usually aimed for dates aka about 90% NCs. A "normal week" would net me about 5 very solid NCs (since I used to do rather few but long sets, my flake rate after the NC was incredibly low. I'd say about 10-15% straight up flakes).
5 solid NCs per week means, let's assume on average 1 out of those flake before a date... 4 girls I can date during the week. That's dates for Mo-Thursday right there.
Since I sucked pretty hard at that time I could translate less than half of my dates into lays and it took me about 1-2 weeks and 2-3 dates each. HOWEVER since I just organized them well 2nd date with girl A, next day 1st date with girl B, next day some funny phonecrap to make C not forget me and the day after I can get a NC with girl D and then it's already time to actually get laid by A.
If you "chain" (lol) girls like this stuff like needyness etc. becomes no problem at all and you stop doing all the over-admiring and that crap because you always have "Oh well, if she kicks me in the nuts for this I'm gonna date someone else tomorrow anyway"-attitude and that's when you start saying and doing things gurls find highly attractive.
As long as you get a constant flow of solid NCs this translates to solid dates and those translate to solid lays. Where in that row are you having the most trouble? My GUESS would be your flake rate is rather high, but I'm not that sure.
Onlinegaming is awesum, that was the only way I got laid before starting with pickup. Up to now I'd still say I'm one of the most successfull guys around here when it comes to that. It's just so damn easy and comfortable to get easy dates. If you fuck up those compared to the standard dating site user, then it's your problem tho. 8D
Edit: The schedule above was when I was fine with approaching but not really good at all the other involved skills, so it was pretty soon in my "pickup-career". Over time I'd say the time invested into going out/getting numbers decreased (less sets, stronger hooks, shorter sets; - overall stronger screening), but the rate of translating dates into lays increased drastically.
I prolly should add that most of early problems had to do with escalating quickly and my biggest strength was the ability to create rapport way quicker than most others at my level. My normal set length before NCing were around 30-40 minutes (that's most likely also why my flakerate was so low). Also stuff I did via text/phone was usually perceived to be pretty damn good if you can trust the girls I asked about it.
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I dont have time for day 2s. I go to work, then I go to the gym, and then I go to DJ Fuji's place. I only got Friday/Saturday/Sunday off and so basically I only got 1 day for day 2s.
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On January 09 2012 09:18 squattincassanova wrote:
I dont have time for day 2s. I go to work, then I go to the gym, and then I go to DJ Fuji's place. I only got Friday/Saturday/Sunday off and so basically I only got 1 day for day 2s.
Subtle bragging, name dropping.
Dude, show us some pics of chicks you've actually slept with, we'll rate them and judge you accordingly.
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Is this the part where I'm supposed to care what you think? haha.
Stop worrying about other people, go work on yourself brah.
User was temp banned for this post.
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On January 09 2012 11:05 squattincassanova wrote:
Is this the part where I'm supposed to care what you think? haha.
Stop worrying about other people, go work on yourself brah.
You obviously do, you come into this thread trying to prove yourself everyday. I've got a stable girlfriend at the moment so don't have a desperate need to be doing PUA stuff (haven't had to for the last two months).
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ya i have to say squattincassanova acts like hes the king of this thread... he seems really desperate for approval
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I always want to say something in this thread. But I have nothing to say. I guess learning social skills is never a bad idea for anyone. I could tut tut and say stupid moral points. But meh, it's interesting, even if I am a happy monogamous loner by nature so playing the field in the grand scale doesn't interest me...This thread is like the Nada's Body thread. Interesting, bizarre, sometimes concerning...but I always come back for a look.
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Mm.. question to all the pros out there..
Is it possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc?
A friend of mine told me something like.. if you find something that you love, then just do it and be really good at it... People.. girls.. will notice.
Art, music, sports.. and to a growing field, even gaming.
Your passion for any of those things is already an icebreaker and an attraction.
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@squatting. You don't have time for day twos? What are you really here for man? An actual relationship, or just getting laid as much as you can?
@jjun. I'd say yes. In fact I'd say the majority of the techniques are dumb. Some are helpful, but mostly as training wheels. Some are helpful though regardless, like the three second rule. You also have to be aware that some concepts, ex rapport, state, ect. Are lifted almost straight from other practices. For example, I just see state as psychologys self fulfilling prophecy.
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It's not only possible, it's statistically probable! Only about 5% of men in first world countries die virgins (under 1% for women) and I'm sure even fewer than that never have a single relationship. If you're a normal person at least a couple relationships will probably try to force their way into your life before it's over. I wouldn't worry about it at all. Just make sure you don't have unrealistic standards or if you insist on having them realize that such standards may stave off the relationships you may have had.
PUA is more for people who want to have a lot of relationships, or at the very least a lot of sex with different partners. I don't think this PUA stuff is terribly glamorous but I do believe it is completely necessary for anyone who wants to live that sort of life, at least in America.
As for being passionate about things, I agree with your friend sort of. If you are extremely passionate about starcraft, you won't really give a fuck what other people may think of your interest in it. You won't hide the fact that you like it to try to appear like less of a nerd and social pressures on you to become interested in more mainstream hobbies will have zero effect. That attitude of this-is-what-I-like-and-I-couldn't-give-less-of-a-fuck-what-you-think is what will attract women to you, not necessarily starcraft itself.
Just my two cents.
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Kennigit
Canada19447 Posts
On January 08 2012 20:11 squattincassanova wrote:Show nested quote +On January 08 2012 11:33 Kennigit wrote:I'm white as fuck. I actually lost count and i don't really put much value in numbers of girls i dated/slept with - the value is in the experience. I've done online dating for ..3 years i guess. I've met...probably ~100 girls. On January 08 2012 11:03 Release wrote:^^^^THE OFFICIAL GUIDE TO ONLINE DATING FOR TLERS
wtf is this? I'm terrible with social interaction w/anyone, but even i'm not desperate enough for this kind of thing This attitude is why you are not getting laid. 100 lays in 3 years is close to almost a new lay every ten days. You RLY this good? And this was without practicing mainstream pickup or with? I noticed with PlentyofFish /OKcupid, its a LOT of the same girls on all the time, unless you are gaming far ass chicks. If I work on game full time, I can probably get a lay every week like if I quit my job, but since I am working 2 jobs and only going out 2 nights a week, I'm averaging a lay every 3 weeks.
I said met, not get laid.
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On January 09 2012 12:22 thirtythree wrote:
It's not only possible, it's statistically probable! Only about 5% of men in first world countries die virgins (under 1% for women) .
What? 5 percent of guys in first world countries stay virgins until their deaths? Can you give some sources for that? Really seems like a lot.
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On January 09 2012 12:24 Kennigit wrote:Show nested quote +On January 08 2012 20:11 squattincassanova wrote:On January 08 2012 11:33 Kennigit wrote:I'm white as fuck. I actually lost count and i don't really put much value in numbers of girls i dated/slept with - the value is in the experience. I've done online dating for ..3 years i guess. I've met...probably ~100 girls. On January 08 2012 11:03 Release wrote:^^^^THE OFFICIAL GUIDE TO ONLINE DATING FOR TLERS
wtf is this? I'm terrible with social interaction w/anyone, but even i'm not desperate enough for this kind of thing This attitude is why you are not getting laid. 100 lays in 3 years is close to almost a new lay every ten days. You RLY this good? And this was without practicing mainstream pickup or with? I noticed with PlentyofFish /OKcupid, its a LOT of the same girls on all the time, unless you are gaming far ass chicks. If I work on game full time, I can probably get a lay every week like if I quit my job, but since I am working 2 jobs and only going out 2 nights a week, I'm averaging a lay every 3 weeks. I said met, not get laid.
hahahahahaha. Kenningit I don't know if correcting him is protecting your reputation, or hurting it :D
on topic: I guess this thread is cool. But I also am so busy all the time that the hierarchy has become eatsleep-schoolwork-choir-starcraft2(I keep up to date on GSL always)-social life. I don't want girls, don't have enough time or really the effort level for it. I suffer from day9 disease where I like to spend time alone but am outgoing.
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On January 09 2012 12:27 heishe wrote:Show nested quote +On January 09 2012 12:22 thirtythree wrote:
It's not only possible, it's statistically probable! Only about 5% of men in first world countries die virgins (under 1% for women) . What? 5 percent of guys in first world countries stay virgins until their deaths? Can you give some sources for that? Really seems like a lot.
I think I first came across the statistic while researching involuntary celibacy but a quick bit of searching got me this:
http://news.softpedia.com/news/4-of-the-Adult-Americans-Die-Virgin-58093.shtml
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Baltimore, USA22251 Posts
On January 09 2012 11:38 Kojak21 wrote:
ya i have to say squattincassanova acts like hes the king of this thread... he seems really desperate for approval
He's been this way for the past 8 years or however long it's been that I've known him. He's consistent, you gotta give him that. 
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On January 09 2012 11:58 jjun212 wrote:
Mm.. question to all the pros out there..
Is it possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc?
A friend of mine told me something like.. if you find something that you love, then just do it and be really good at it... People.. girls.. will notice.
Art, music, sports.. and to a growing field, even gaming.
Your passion for any of those things is already an icebreaker and an attraction.
Yes, 100%.
Pickup pretty much rests on the foundation of "I'm a nerd who can't get laid. I'll go check what people do that GET laid. I'll try to emulate their behaviour and see which parts net me results and which parts don't."
Doing martial arts improved my pickup skills more than any pickup book. Dancing Salsa did more than any pickup book. Having hobbies that you love (hint: love more than a random girl you just met) means you're having a life and constant values (which is incredibly attractive). Once you get good at any of those you get... tadaaa... more confidence in your daily life. Bam.
(I probably should add that I never had the balls to go to a Salsa class alone before I started with pickup. Also I should add that on the first day of the class there was a pretty hot girl some business whussy was talking to all the time before the course started, stood next to her during warmup, kept talking to her etc.. When the course was at "go ahead try and find a partner" I walked up to her (scared to death, my voice almost failed me :S), asked her if she's already taken and offered my hand. She didn't even look at the dude who couldn't get his mouth open but already (in his world) invested so much to get her. Guy looked like he's gonna kill me any second. I felt like a fucking god when that happened. - Hobbies like this enable you to actually GET the positive feedback you need to grow as a person; - you're not gonna get that feedback from sitting alone in a corner. ... That and like only 2-3 other small experiences (which are probably normal for most people who are like "Lol PU just be yourself") pretty much made my brain explode and I felt like I suddenly was on the other side of the fence. Obviously I was still a newb, but simply realizing what you CAN do and how EASY it was in retrospect is fucking huge.)
However, why I came to love pickup and the associated skillsets is that I know of no other thing that is able to actually analyze what's going wrong between guys & girls or even in relationships from time to time. Taking myself as an example the whole concept of "you have to touch the girl before not doing it for 6h and then moving in for the kiss" just fucking blew my mind at the time I learned it. Another thing that was like wtf for me was the whole "If you give up stuff you love for her that'll mean she'll regard you as a random whining pussy instead of someone who really likes her"-thing.
Just finding out about those two points and becoming aware of what they actually convey easily enabled me to do well on dates I would have fucked up before that.
The goal of "doing pickup" should not be to create a personality out of thin air, but to enable you to properly convey that you are already someone pretty damn cool.
I'd say 90% in sparking the intial attraction is about conveying a strong personality. At the point I'm at right now I'm able to subtly "show off" what I'm about in pretty much 20-30 minutes, opposed to weeks like I always thought it has to take. The plain ability to convey my values, my major likes and dislikes within a very short timeframe and without looking like a dork who would die if she'd leave right now but like someone who's having fun talking to her while also being able to say "see ya" any instant and walking over to someone else.. that is what creates attraction in women and, unless you steal theirs, also usually respect in men.
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On January 09 2012 11:58 jjun212 wrote:
Mm.. question to all the pros out there..
Is it possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc?
A friend of mine told me something like.. if you find something that you love, then just do it and be really good at it... People.. girls.. will notice.
Art, music, sports.. and to a growing field, even gaming.
Your passion for any of those things is already an icebreaker and an attraction.
Unfortunately attraction is not the important aspect of pick-up. Comfort is. And tactics are necessary to escalate physically and generate comfort. Approaches and having a regimen will help you build comfort. Attraction is much more important to men than it is to women.
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On January 09 2012 11:58 jjun212 wrote:
Mm.. question to all the pros out there..
Is it possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc?
A friend of mine told me something like.. if you find something that you love, then just do it and be really good at it... People.. girls.. will notice.
Art, music, sports.. and to a growing field, even gaming.
Your passion for any of those things is already an icebreaker and an attraction.
Can you get good at starcraft without learning the build orders and tactics? A lot of tactics are crutches to get you started.... but either way... you can go out and get good from blind trial and error (what naturals do, but it takes many many years), or you can go out and work at it and read materials, and know the dos and donts and get good at a faster speed.
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On January 09 2012 16:39 squattincassanova wrote:Show nested quote +On January 09 2012 11:58 jjun212 wrote:
Mm.. question to all the pros out there..
Is it possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc?
A friend of mine told me something like.. if you find something that you love, then just do it and be really good at it... People.. girls.. will notice.
Art, music, sports.. and to a growing field, even gaming.
Your passion for any of those things is already an icebreaker and an attraction. Can you get good at starcraft without learning the build orders and tactics? A lot of tactics are crutches to get you started.... but either way... you can go out and get good from blind trial and error (what naturals do, but it takes many many years), or you can go out and work at it and read materials, and know the dos and donts and get good at a faster speed.
Stop trying to tell people picking up girls is hard. Stop comparing it to something as hard as starcraft. Seriously.
He asked if it is possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc.
The answer is a VERY clear "Yes" since, to my knowledge, for the last 20000 years it was somehow possible for the human race to replicate. ALL of the techniques in modern pickup are nothing more than a conscious effort to do what has been going on between males and females all along. ALL of the techniques are things that SOME people do without anyone ever telling them how to or why.
Like, durp, ask your dad how he created attraction with your mom and how he broke her bitchshield. Then ask your mom if she had LMR and how your dad did overcome it.
Please make sure to respond in this thread with their answers!
Edit:
On January 09 2012 16:18 scaban84 wrote:Show nested quote +On January 09 2012 11:58 jjun212 wrote:
Mm.. question to all the pros out there..
Is it possible to find and create a relationship with someone without all these tactics, rules, etc?
A friend of mine told me something like.. if you find something that you love, then just do it and be really good at it... People.. girls.. will notice.
Art, music, sports.. and to a growing field, even gaming.
Your passion for any of those things is already an icebreaker and an attraction. Unfortunately attraction is not the important aspect of pick-up. Comfort is. And tactics are necessary to escalate physically and generate comfort. Approaches and having a regimen will help you build comfort. Attraction is much more important to men than it is to women.
Mhmm... while I agree that comfort is what seperates people who are okay and people who are good "correct" escalation and comfort-generation are actually pretty straight forward and imo, best solved by a trained intution (hint: social experience) than actual tactics and routines. Like, you can throw almost any line towards me and I can find a way to spark attraction with it during my opening, but doing the same during comfort is nearly impossible.
I'm working a lot with someone who is pretty damn technical when he's trying to build rapport and, imo, the more you let logic dictate this part the harder it gets. It's kinda hard to explain, but when I'm looking to build rapport actually BEING interested in the other person is pretty much all I need to fix any problems that occur. Like, simply being an empathetic human being without letting someone cut your balls off would be totally enough. Does it come across what I'm trying to say?
Also I wouldn't say that attraction is more important to men than to women, this argument would prolly end in stupid theorycraft, but from my experience you can get away with a LOT of things she'd not allow any other guy if she's attracted to you. I doubt there is much difference between men and women if it comes to that. The stronger frame and mindset wins.
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Reading through this thread was fun, alot of you are just here looking for ways to score and only score, not really on how to maintain a good relationship, which is IMO far more important then picking up some random girl. Hey if you want to get laid just buy an escort, way cheaper and probally more experienced then that girl you wasted 200 bucks on just to please her appetite.
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EPT
