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[Battle Report] CRIPPLE FIGHT~! - Page 2

Forum Index > BW General
Post a Reply
Prev 1 2 All
Raithed
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
China7078 Posts
July 15 2008 00:19 GMT
#21
holy shit, that zerg is gosu.
evanthebouncy!
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States12796 Posts
July 15 2008 00:30 GMT
#22
Story was nice. Spoiler makes me bit angry at you because I for the large part liked your story and your spoiler is full of spite and insecurity that bunch of people are going to criticize you.
The story is good man, no worry.
Life is run, it is dance, it is fast, passionate and BAM!, you dance and sing and booze while you can for now is the time and time is mine. Smile and laugh when still can for now is the time and soon you die!
Showtime!
Profile Joined November 2007
Canada2938 Posts
July 15 2008 01:08 GMT
#23
Edgar Allen Poe's The Fall of the House of Usher comes to mind.
Mini skirt season is right around the corner. ☻
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
July 15 2008 01:27 GMT
#24
T'was intentional A few other random references in there that few people will catch.

+ Show Spoiler [Meandering Way Off Topic Random Philos…] +
Evan, I understand where you're coming from, but in my experience that simply isn't how the internet works. Basically, the first person of some reputation to post their opinion will set the opinion of 90% of my audience who just bases everything they believe based on popular opinion. So by discouraging people to even bother giving me their inane criticism, I feel I'm making it more likely that someone with something positive to say will post first, thus ensuring other people will also enjoy my story (because even if it is good, if you read it wanting to hate it, you will). Yeah, it's stupid and perhaps underhanded, but that's how I think it works. Here's an example of replies I got for a story I would consider to have better quality, but that started with a bad review:

+ Show Spoiler +
who wants to read a huge wall of text posted by you

not a lot of people


i hate you

go kill thyself

poor, but keep going.
writing is fun.



My advice, choose a more interesting topic. Stopped reading after he was rejected from university due to inability to bake muffins out of boredom. Other than that, its well written.

Edit: apparently its not well written, i guess my expectations on this forum are just lowering. I also probably didnt read enough of it.

i think one major thing you should think about is purpose. why did you write what you wrote? what audience do you want to read it?

because i guarantee you 95% of not just TL but the world doesn't give a shit about some boy baking muffins

I didn't make it past the second paragraph


no it isn't. it's clumsy, the description is forced, and sometimes doesn't even make sense.
keep trying though, writing is like any skill - you'll get better with practice.

writing is an art, but you're confined by the rules and structure of the language that you're using.
i don't have time or the inclination to correct your essay, but you posted it looking for feedback (im assuming, although perhaps you were just looking for praise?), and that's what you've gotten.
like i said, keep reading and writing and you'll get better.

and no, writing is not subjective in that way

people here haven't responded well to this because its badly written. writing is subjective based on the audience you're writing for, not based on the writer.

And so on.


It was just like this: an obviously silly little thing I wrote up for the amusement of anyone who likes this kind of thing. Other forums I posted the same story on, but beginning with modesty, received positive enthusiasm just like in this thread.

I know I'm a good writer. I don't need anyone to tell me that. If I proofread my work, think about it long and hard, and put in the hours, I'll always come up with something good. If I write something silly in one draft and don't bother to proofread it, it's still amusing enough. But the fact of the matter is that you still have to win your audience, and unfortunately for silly little things like this, you have to directly inform people that's what they are, because apparently by virtue of its own existence is not enough.


Thanks for comments, glad you enjoyed it guys I hope it was a satisfactory 1500th post ;D
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
evanthebouncy!
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States12796 Posts
July 15 2008 01:33 GMT
#25
Ah k that makes sense too. I always hate how first poster just type something retarded and derail the thread completely too.
Life is run, it is dance, it is fast, passionate and BAM!, you dance and sing and booze while you can for now is the time and time is mine. Smile and laugh when still can for now is the time and soon you die!
fgsvsd
Profile Joined June 2007
Switzerland348 Posts
July 15 2008 04:03 GMT
#26
<33333.

Thanks. Those were 10 minutes of my life well spent.
+ Show Spoiler +
And thanks to StripedBlueCrow for linking it from the General Forum's cripple thread.
Without that I'd most likely never have read this.
+ Show Spoiler +
Is it just me, or has TLnet strangely become more entertaining since the purge announcement?
alffla
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Hong Kong20321 Posts
July 15 2008 04:43 GMT
#27
wow wtf seriously these crippled kids are that good at sc? lol omg
Graphicssavior[gm] : What is a “yawn” rape ;; Masumune - It was the year of the pig for those fucking defilers. Chill - A clinic you say? okum: SC without Korean yelling is like porn without sex. konamix: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!
prOxi.swAMi
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Australia3091 Posts
July 15 2008 05:34 GMT
#28
That was very well written. You went to the trouble of images and all, well done! I loved the bit where the fat lady comes in and screams CRIPPLE FIGHT!
GJ
Oh no
IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32274 Posts
July 15 2008 05:35 GMT
#29
lol
Moderator<:3-/-<
DanceCommander
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States1808 Posts
July 15 2008 06:08 GMT
#30
its called 2 base carrier mark
RoC)Ninjah
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States238 Posts
July 15 2008 06:21 GMT
#31
I thought it was gunna turn out to be a real starcraft story, of 2 kids playing against eachother using only the mouse, and a patch over 1 eye

exellent anyway :D
Much will win a title before his hair turns grey.
Ftrunkz
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Australia2474 Posts
July 15 2008 06:22 GMT
#32
without a doubt the best battle report i've ever read! Where did you get the inspiration to write this? So good!
@NvPinder on twitter | Member of Gamecom Nv | http://www.clan-ta.com | http://www.youtube.com/user/ftrunkz | http://www.twitchtv.com/xghpinder
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