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i'm a fuck up...

Blogs > YPang
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YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
August 09 2009 00:31 GMT
#1
[rant]

I'm not sure if i feel pissed or sad right now. But my dad is a fucken asshole... I dont even know where to begin.

I guess firstly i would like to post my life schedule that my parents wants me to live by.

+ Show Spoiler [Summer Schedule] +
SUMMER SCHEDULE:
7:30-wake up
8:00-12am Study ACT's/SAT's until 12am
1-5pm-Study more ACT/SAT's
7-8PM - Run
8-11:30pm - Do AP homework.


As you can see i literally have NO room for "fun". The only times i had a friend over was on november of 2008, and then i had them come again 2 weeks ago. That was it. I basically cannot do anything Except study (DURING THE SUMMER)...

As many of you TLnetter's know that i am forbidden to play starcraft, view teamliquid, go on any other sites thats not related to studies excluding CNN and newsites. If it wasn't for starcraft and teamliquid/MSN(i'm forbidden to use MSN/AIM as well, thats why i use meebo so when my parents come i can alt f4 it faster than MSN) i would have literally no social contact/communication at ALL.
-----------

I'm asian, but i'm not a school smart asian, i admit. I have a 3.6 gpa, and i scored 26 on my ACT's i'm not going to lie. But that is HORRIBLE for an asian kid. So as a result, today they even tightens my schedule(I have no idea how thats possible), and basically further implement it because they want me to get a 30+ on my next ACT's.

The funny thing is that, i think what they're doing is really counter productive but there's no way i can bring it up to them without being shit on. But honestly though, who can fucken concentrate all day doing some stupid standardize testing bullshit. Holyshit i'm being trained like a standardized test taking progamer right now except im not actually doing much at all. I do do some studying but not NEARLY as much as they expect me to.

Plus i was really looking forwards to senior year next year because i wanted to do cross country, but of course i shoulda saw it coming, they denied it and made me study 24/7 again next senior year. I was pretty down for that week when they told me i couldn't do it anymore AFTER i got my physical exam done and everything. I did cross country/track my Sophmore year because first i wanted to get out of my house and 2nd according to my parents its something i put on my college application. They tried to persuade me so much to play tennis instead cuz they said all asian kids were doing it cuz its easy and you put it on your college, but i managed to refuse and still do track.

Ironically i had my HIGHEST GPA the semester i did cross country, SO as a result they believe that "If i didn't do any other sports my grade would go even higher"... So of course i was denied to doing anything my Junior year and studyied 24/7, and boom my GPA dropped, and they were wondering "WHY?! u study 24/7 and ur gpa still suck balls". So now i can't do any sports next year, and im forced to study all day. I've tried explaining the concept to them that i cannot study all day and concentrate like that, but of course they were really close minded...

----------------

All of this is not even mentioning the fact that my dad was/is really abusive as well, my first memory of my ass getting kicked was when i was like 3 or 4, and i accidentally spilled some milk, and he got me down and started rolling/kicking me with this foot. These sorta things continued all the way until i was 17 (which is this year). He used to spit on me and belt me which resulted in clear red swollen skin. This year however he was about to do it again after getting my ACT score, but i told him to "Fuck off and i can't stand your bullshit anymore" in the most mannerful way in chinese i could think of at the moment.

But man i've thought about leaving home SEVERAL times, i have a good friend n we talked about sharing an apartment together, he agreed that he would be able to do it if i could. But i know my parents would not allow me to do that.

Anyways i'm turning 18 this upcoming september, and just counting off the days until i go to college leave ...

I do realize that my dad's abusive behavior comes from his mom, and its passed down from generation and generation, but i've made a promise to myself that i would stop this shit when i get my kids. I wanna even tatoo it on my arm to remind myself about it even more. Peace out~
[/rant]



***
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
Racenilatr
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
United States2756 Posts
August 09 2009 00:33 GMT
#2
good luck!

It seems if you are really desperate, you can squeeze some "fun tiem" into right after the 8-11:30 part. Sometimes I watch TV from 11:30-1 its nice and relaxing
rockon1215
Profile Joined May 2009
United States612 Posts
August 09 2009 00:36 GMT
#3
Man, that sucks dude. Massive respect to you for remaining sane though. That's hard to do. Good luck on your exams and life in general.
Flash v Jaedong The finals that is ALWAYS meant to be
motbob
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States12546 Posts
August 09 2009 00:37 GMT
#4
When you have a successful life you'll look back on this and think it's not so bad.
They're making 1/4 of your life hell so the other 3/4ths will be better!

BTW they're not going to kick you out of the house for doing cross country. Show them scientific studies that say that athletics can increase GPA (they're out there)
ModeratorGood content always wins.
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
August 09 2009 00:37 GMT
#5
On August 09 2009 09:33 Racenilatr wrote:
good luck!

It seems if you are really desperate, you can squeeze some "fun tiem" into right after the 8-11:30 part. Sometimes I watch TV from 11:30-1 its nice and relaxing


my study room is really close to their bedroom, and my dad goes to the bathroom often at night and would see my light still opening, and would ask what i was doing staying up so late... lol but i've still done it regardless. They usualyl sleep at 11pm, and then i do shit till 12 or 12:30 am.
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
MoltkeWarding
Profile Joined November 2003
5195 Posts
August 09 2009 00:41 GMT
#6
All I can say is that you must start thinking about the unthinkable, and the consequences of simply saying no.
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
August 09 2009 00:42 GMT
#7
tell them that studying for ACTs/SATs is pointless if you don't know what the hell to study,and that 10 hours of staring in a book is a waste.

My SAT studying consisted of:
vaguely looking at an SAT book on the weekends for 1 hour until the last week
Review of writing section the week of-memorize writing rules
Essay is easy shit that you can improvise
SAT Math is more about avoiding careless mistakes than knowing how to do the problems-just do the hard problems in a few books
SAT Reading is just critical reading-this one you actually need to practice to get it right. I spent probably 3/4th of all the time on this


I spent maybe 3 hours a week in the summer studying, took a class that was completely useless and was a waste of time and money, and then on the week of studied for 5 days 5 hours each, then took the test. The improvement from my PSAT to my SAT was over 340 points.

Tell your parents that one of your asian friends, who has a shittier GPA and a probably worse PSAT, did the above and improved well, as opposed to other asian friends who probably went to cram school every day and did well but not crazy well.
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
clazziquai
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
6685 Posts
August 09 2009 00:42 GMT
#8
Fuck asian parents. My dad is not as strict as you but I can somewhat feel your pain.

Btw is your computer in your room? If so, I'm kind of surprised, considering your parents are that strict. Usually, the strict parents I know place the computer in the living room and such.

Also, when you go to college, are you going to be paying or your parents? If the latter, then you might still need to deal with their bullshit. Otherwise, have fun and hang in there bro!
#1 Sea.Really Fan / #1 Nesh Fan / Terran Forever~
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
August 09 2009 00:46 GMT
#9
That sucks but deep down I wish I could have traded places with you; my parents are very laid back, I fill out all the forms and signed up for all the courses and decided whether or not I wanted to study. I'm a better student than my parents ever were (and they were pretty good, it was just a different time) but I always wonder how good I could have been if I had been pushed instead of doing all the pushing. Especially as I apply to colleges and I know I'm gonna be rejected from my top choices even if my parents think I'm being pessimistic. Idk maybe I did well because they were laid back but they took a huge gamble on me. Just another perspective, gl dude
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
August 09 2009 00:46 GMT
#10
On August 09 2009 09:42 clazziquai wrote:
Fuck asian parents. My dad is not as strict as you but I can somewhat feel your pain.

Btw is your computer in your room? If so, I'm kind of surprised, considering your parents are that strict. Usually, the strict parents I know place the computer in the living room and such.

Also, when you go to college, are you going to be paying or your parents? If the latter, then you might still need to deal with their bullshit. Otherwise, have fun and hang in there bro!


My computer is in an office desk which i also study on, so i can quickly exit the stuff and pretend to be studying and shit :D. But yea they said they'd pay my college fees, but i'd have to pay them back except without interest fees like in banks.

But this is probably toughest moment of my life right now, cuz im in summer of junior year and this time i'm starting to apply for college, and asian parents are freaking out and stuff. But after i get through these few grueling month, everything will be okay, and i'll be in a dorm. There is NO FUCKING WAY am i gonna live at home when i go to college. No one not even if my parents disown me will the keep me from leaving after i graduate high school.
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
Pokebunny
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States10654 Posts
August 09 2009 00:47 GMT
#11
On August 09 2009 09:42 clazziquai wrote:
Fuck asian parents. My dad is not as strict as you but I can somewhat feel your pain.

Btw is your computer in your room? If so, I'm kind of surprised, considering your parents are that strict. Usually, the strict parents I know place the computer in the living room and such.

Also, when you go to college, are you going to be paying or your parents? If the latter, then you might still need to deal with their bullshit. Otherwise, have fun and hang in there bro!


my computer is in my living room and i have lenient parents lol

Anyways shiet ypang that sorta sucks. How do you get C+ without your parents noticing you play >_>
Semipro Terran player | Pokebunny#1710 | twitter.com/Pokebunny | twitch.tv/Pokebunny | facebook.com/PokebunnySC
mahnini
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
United States6862 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-08-09 00:48:48
August 09 2009 00:47 GMT
#12
i think many people have their priority backwards. they say work hard now and enjoy life later, but work itself is unending so even then you'd have to "find" the time. you'd never hear someone advocate "enjoy life now and work later" so why do it the other way around? it's not like you have a set amount of work that once you finish you will be able to stop. the way i see it, you should enjoy life as it is because even if you manage to retire from work at a young age you've wasted an irreplaceable time.

i dont know if the above makes sense but i guess what i'm saying is find some time to live life however you see fit.
the world's a playground. you know that when you're a kid, but somewhere along the way everyone forgets it.
Zoler
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Sweden6339 Posts
August 09 2009 00:48 GMT
#13
On August 09 2009 09:37 motbob wrote:
When you have a successful life you'll look back on this and think it's not so bad.
They're making 1/4 of your life hell so the other 3/4ths will be better!

BTW they're not going to kick you out of the house for doing cross country. Show them scientific studies that say that athletics can increase GPA (they're out there)


You only live once
Lim Yo Hwan forever!
SHr3DD3r
Profile Joined March 2009
Pakistan2137 Posts
August 09 2009 00:49 GMT
#14
Oh man I feel for you...
I would say that your parents are thinking about whats best for you - but as you said their measures are indeed counter-productive. You are about to start college. So I wish you the very best of luck in the near and distant future. Stay strong.
Hit them hard! Hit them low! - Forever a Bisu Fan!~!
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
August 09 2009 00:50 GMT
#15
On August 09 2009 09:47 mahnini wrote:
i think many people have their priority backwards. they say work hard now and enjoy life later, but work itself is unending so even then you'd have to "find" the time. you'd never hear someone advocate "enjoy life now and work later" so why do it the other way around? it's not like you have a set amount of work that once you finish you will be able to stop. the way i see it, you should enjoy life as it is because even if you manage to retire from work at a young age you've wasted an irreplaceable time.

i dont know if the above makes sense but i guess what i'm saying is find some time to live life however you see fit.


I've basically wasted my teenage social life doing NOTHING, there's no arguing through this I CANNOT go out ANYTIME during the school year, not thanks giving, not march break. The only time i've been able to do something besides SC/study/run, is summer to the movies with friends like once or twice thats it.
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
Titusmaster6
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States5937 Posts
August 09 2009 00:52 GMT
#16
Sounds like my mom. honestly dude, just make it over this hump and you're in college. It doesn't matter if it's not the college they want you to be in, but you'll be IN COLLEGE. That's when you can do whatever the fuck you want and study or play as hard as you want. Dont worry man, it's almost over...keep your head up
Shorts down shorts up, BOOM, just like that.
foeffa
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Belgium2115 Posts
August 09 2009 00:57 GMT
#17
Ugh that's horrible. :/ Studying that many hours a day is useless anyway. -____-
觀過斯知仁矣.
mahnini
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
United States6862 Posts
August 09 2009 00:57 GMT
#18
On August 09 2009 09:47 mahnini wrote:
i think many people have their priority backwards. they say work hard now and enjoy life later, but work itself is unending so even then you'd have to "find" the time. you'd never hear someone advocate "enjoy life now and work later" so why do it the other way around? it's not like you have a set amount of work that once you finish you will be able to stop. the way i see it, you should enjoy life as it is because even if you manage to retire from work at a young age you've wasted an irreplaceable time.

i dont know if the above makes sense but i guess what i'm saying is find some time to live life however you see fit.

actually that's bullshit. don't find time to live life. just fucking do it.

"anything that takes up your time takes up your life, what if never do anything that you think is important?"
the world's a playground. you know that when you're a kid, but somewhere along the way everyone forgets it.
stalife
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
Canada1222 Posts
August 09 2009 00:58 GMT
#19
Don't think of it as a waste of time... Think of this as the 3 years of "slump" SKT1 had. Boxer gone, oov and kingdom retiring, zergs fucking up big time. But look now! SKT1 is yet again the CHAMPION. Your "Champion" phase may come in college, or maybe post-undergrad studies, or maybe even after that. But they will come if you keep yourself busy studying and not wasting time with social life :D
www.memoryexpress.com
Refrige
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States179 Posts
August 09 2009 00:58 GMT
#20
no time set aside for college apps O_O?
you're supposed to be starting right now..
on the bright side it'll allow you to get on the computer more :D
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