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Active: 621 users

Pitchfork Preserver Express: MLG Spring

Blogs > Waxangel
Post a Reply
1 2 3 4 Next All
Waxangel
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
United States33390 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-01 21:22:17
July 01 2013 20:57 GMT
#1
The Pitchfork Preserver

Express

Twitter At The Speed Of Print

Special Edition

Proleague and GSTL to be absorbed into Acer TeamStory Cup following shameful MLG Spring performance

News at a Glance

· MLG to hold first annual progamer handshake seminar

· NSH agree to trade Tassadar to Prime for ByuN's puppy and pack of cigarettes

· INnoVation enjoys weekend off by staring at blank wall for 15 straight hours

· Stream viewer not sure if Axeltoss is making a joke or really fucking hates his co-caster

[image loading]

Following a dismal MLG Spring Championship performance where none of their players managed to reach the final four, Korean esports organizations KeSPA and eSF announced that Proleague and GSTL would immediately cease operations. "After eSF and KeSPA players suffered unspeakable humiliation at the hands of progamers from international teams at MLG Spring, we have decided that we cannot put the future of Korean eSports in peril by continuing to invest in the extremely uncompetitive and fruitless GSTL and Proleague tournaments." read a rare joint-statement from the two leading organizations in Korean StarCraft.

In a move long predicted by many industry experts, the ailing organizations also announced that they would request their member teams be merged into the Acer TeamStory Cup, the premier team competition in the international StarCraft II scene. When contacted for comment, ATC commissioner Dennis "Take" Gehlen seemed supportive of the move.

"The ATC is more than happy to include teams from diverse regions, even if those regions aren't especially competitive in international competition. KeSPA and eSF have many exciting teams with great potential like SK Telecom T1, whose multiple Proleague titles show that they could be ready to compete in the big leagues now. Of course, we can't just have a dozen Koreans teams suddenly competing alongside the likes of Mousesports and Axiom, so we would have to hold a qualifier to see which teams deserve to join ATC Season II."

STX Soul's Dear, sixth place finisher and highest placing KeSPA player at MLG Anaheim also reacted positively upon hearing the news. "It's really hard for a foreigner to beat a Swedish player, so I expected to lose to NaNiwa. But when I lost to a fellow foreigner in Polt, who managed to become extremely good in America despite being a part-time student, I knew that I had hit the limits of Korean training. Even though it's just online, competing against international teams in the ATC should help me improve a lot more than just playing other Koreans in Proleague" said the Protoss player, who had been a key player for STX Soul's playoff campaign. "Who knows, maybe I'll even get a chance to play against Team Property's SjoW in an ace match one day. A guy can dream, can't he?"


Pitchfork Preserver EXPRESS brought to you by salle, stuchiu and WaxAngel.


****
AdministratorHey HP can you redo everything youve ever done because i have a small complaint?
BEARDiaguz
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Australia2362 Posts
July 01 2013 21:01 GMT
#2
that innovation joke is fucking gold jerry, gold.
ProgamerAustralian alcohol user follow @iaguzSC2
Master of DalK
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
Canada1797 Posts
July 01 2013 21:04 GMT
#3
Best pitchfork preserver yet. Well done sir.
@MasterDalK | Maelstrom Entertainment | Streaming Every Esport Under the Sun
Musicus
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany23576 Posts
July 01 2013 21:11 GMT
#4
fucking brilliant

INnoVation enjoys weekend off by staring at blank wall for 15 straight hours


rofl
Maru and Serral are probably top 5.
flagg
Profile Joined October 2010
Sweden123 Posts
July 01 2013 21:13 GMT
#5
Hahaha, poor Dear :D
mnck
Profile Joined April 2010
Denmark1518 Posts
July 01 2013 21:17 GMT
#6
Rofl, bringing shame to all of kespa :DD
@Munck
Boucot
Profile Blog Joined October 2011
France15997 Posts
July 01 2013 21:19 GMT
#7
Hahahaha, oh shit, this is hilarious, the best one so far and by far.
Former SC2 writer for Millenium - twitter.com/Boucot
cchily13
Profile Joined May 2012
70 Posts
July 01 2013 21:20 GMT
#8
Oh god this is amazing Dear's statement is so good
ROOT is reborn!!
Acronysis
Profile Joined November 2011
872 Posts
July 01 2013 21:23 GMT
#9
Innovation joke definitely my favorite. Fun stuff!
The multiplying villanies of man do swarm upon him.
eviltomahawk
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States11135 Posts
July 01 2013 21:25 GMT
#10
NSH should trade the pack of cigs for Bisu.
ㅇㅅㅌㅅ
StarVe
Profile Joined June 2011
Germany13591 Posts
July 01 2013 21:31 GMT
#11
Keep 'em coming, guys. They get better and better.
freerolll
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Belgium1056 Posts
July 01 2013 21:36 GMT
#12
No way im giving up a cute puppy for tassadar
Always give without remembering & always receive without forgetting.
DrPandaPhD
Profile Joined November 2011
5188 Posts
July 01 2013 21:37 GMT
#13
With Tassadar's GSTL record I would also trade him for a puppy ><

Was an entertaining read, the best one so far.
리노크 👑
Yorbon
Profile Joined December 2011
Netherlands4272 Posts
July 01 2013 21:40 GMT
#14
"The ATC is more than happy to include teams from diverse regions, even if those regions aren't especially competitive in international competition."

Laughed quite a bit on this one. Great job again ^^
Ricemagical
Profile Joined November 2010
270 Posts
July 01 2013 22:14 GMT
#15
It's awesome if this is actually going to become a weekly thing :D
Ysellian
Profile Joined December 2010
Netherlands9029 Posts
July 01 2013 22:31 GMT
#16
Haha damn I should stop reading this at 0:30 XD Best one yet!
emanresU
Profile Joined November 2012
Germany393 Posts
July 01 2013 22:37 GMT
#17
· Stream viewer not sure if Axeltoss is making a joke or really fucking hates his co-caster


Has to be the best thing on pitchfork until now good work.
There is nothing more cool than being proud of the things you love. -Sean "Day[9]" Plott
Mikelius
Profile Joined September 2010
Germany517 Posts
July 01 2013 22:39 GMT
#18
Brilliant, keep 'em coming!
Less QQ, more PewPew
GhandiEAGLE
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States20754 Posts
July 01 2013 22:44 GMT
#19
It's always funny to see Waxangel's tweets in extended form ^_^
Oh, my achin' hands, from rakin' in grands, and breakin' in mic stands
tili
Profile Joined July 2012
United States1332 Posts
July 01 2013 22:49 GMT
#20
This is fantastic.
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