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[Advice] What to do? - Page 3

Blogs > NeverGG
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InfeSteD
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
United States4658 Posts
May 29 2009 08:48 GMT
#41
I dont really know much about u in terms of personal life ... but do you have a boyfriend? Ithink having someone helps alot sometimes when you are at a place where you dont feel comfortable but u still wanna be there for certain reasons.. I dunno how to explain and dont wanna be offensive either o_O

w/e
snowbird
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
Germany2044 Posts
May 29 2009 08:51 GMT
#42
~ The language barrier (I'm rubbish with languages even if I'm trying.)
I don't think you can ever be happy over there if you don't speak the language at least at conversational level. It's just a necessity and being bad at languages is no excuse to give up from the start, you just have to try harder then. Cut back on the reporting a bit and take afternoon/evening classes at some university, good place to make friends too.


~ Seeing/experiencing discrimination because I'm a foreign English teacher (it's not only me if you go look at Dave's ESL cafe.) Plus apparently now we all have swine flu -_-;
Guess that's true but being a foreigner also has its advantages. You're special, get more attention, often have a bonus (people will more often forgive things they wouldn't forgive a Korean). It just goes both ways, don't only see the negative side.
Being a kyopo in Korea that doesn't speak Korean is much worse I think.


~ Missing my Mum (my only remaining family.)
That's a good point.

~ Becoming Julyzerg because I have issues with food.
How will that change when you leave Korea? Don't blame it on the Korean food, blame it on your eating habits and work on them. Korean can be a very healthy low-fat diet unless you go eat samgyobsal everyday.


When it comes down to it I think it's all because I lack confidence in any part of my life and I'm trying so hard to please everyone here that I go off the deep end every time someone says something negative. The last thing I want is for people to hate me at TL that's why I wanted to explain some of why I react the way I do.


'I'm trying so hard to please everyone here' - that's exactly the problem. But I don't want to try to analyze you because I don't know you well and it would be rude, but I think the internet is the wrong place to go and look for affirmation and boost confidence.
Also you ARE whiny and defensive, look at this thread. Why deny it? Sure, you have your reasons, but that doesn't change the fact that you are and you can't expect random people on the internet to respect your feelings because it's the goddamn internet. I mean you have a star, you're a girl, you're known on the forums - you get special treatment already and then there's like 1 out 100 replys that offend you and you go off like that. That IS whiny! Not trying to be offensive here, just want to tell you that you just need to learn to deal with it.
@riotsnowbird
konadora *
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
Singapore66363 Posts
May 29 2009 08:55 GMT
#43
'I'm trying so hard to please everyone here'


I think you shouldn't push yourself too hard, I was once translating every single interview there was, but that just messed me up real bad. Now, when I just don't feel like it or am too tired, I just don't do it. You should try to go by your own pace and target. Go OTOT (Own time, own target).
POGGERS
VioleTAK
Profile Joined July 2006
4360 Posts
May 29 2009 09:20 GMT
#44
Indeed. Do what you love to do.

As for all the rest... Its opportunities in disguise.
Life is giving you golden chances to remain aware while seeing all the crap come up to the surface, like lack of confidence, fear, doubt and anger. When they come up, don't identify.. You are not your thoughts, you are not your emotions. You are the one who is able to see them rising. See the pain knocking on your mind's door, wanting to become one with your thoughts. See the suffering pushing in the background, wanting to become one with your emotions. Be the observing witness, and cut it all with your sword of consciousness.

Enlightenment in 1 paragraph ;-)
Every fan of Starcraft is a fan of Lim Yo Hwan by association
Vequeth
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United Kingdom1116 Posts
May 29 2009 10:09 GMT
#45
Only told you once on irc that I loved your photos, but I really do!

The internet is a harsh place and I am sure that anyone that invests in internet opinions on an emotional level is going to come out hurting again, its just not the same as friends in real life. Learning the language could be key here, it is hard for a lot of people but the difference to your lifestyle in a country when you know the language is unexplainable. Isnt tasteless learning korean too? Surely you can get some tips/tricks off him!

Stay pro o/

Aspiring British Caster / Masters Protoss
Thojorin
Profile Joined May 2008
Germany162 Posts
May 29 2009 10:38 GMT
#46
IMO you should ask zourself "What are my long-term plans (~5-10 years) in life and how do I want to achieve them?" Maybe this can help to make your choice easier.
It is wise to keep in mind that neither success nor failure is ever final. --- Roger Babson
mahnini
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
United States6862 Posts
May 29 2009 11:39 GMT
#47
if you truly like what you do then there should be no question
the world's a playground. you know that when you're a kid, but somewhere along the way everyone forgets it.
Railxp
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
Hong Kong1313 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-05-29 12:04:39
May 29 2009 11:55 GMT
#48
On May 29 2009 16:18 Last Romantic wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 29 2009 15:34 MYM.Testie wrote:
NEVERGG
ISN'T YOUR DRILL THE ONE THAT WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS, THE EARTH, AND THROUGH TO TOMORROW? WORK HARDER. DO BETTER. BE STRONGER. NEVER WASTE TIME PITYING YOURSELF BECAUSE IT'S TIME YOU COULD USE DOING SOMETHING GOOD FOR YOURSELF. DON'T WALK. RUN! DON'T JUMP. FLY! (THEN SHARE THE SECRET!?!)

IF THERE'S A WALL IN OUR WAY WE'LL BREAK IT DOWN!

IF THERE'S NO PATH WE'LL MAKE IT WITH THESE HANDS!

GO BEYOND THE IMPOSSIBLE AND KICK REASON TO THE CURB!


WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM



DON'T BELIEVE IN YOURSELF,

BELIEVE IN US (collective TL), WHO BELIEVES IN YOU!!!!!!!!!!



if you're completely lost:
+ Show Spoiler +


~\(。◕‿‿◕。)/~,,,,,,,,>
SwEEt[TearS]
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Canada1575 Posts
May 29 2009 13:04 GMT
#49
Just don't mind the douches. Like in any internet community you're bound to find e-thugs and trolls who just take pleasure in insulting or ridiculizing people in attempt to hurt them IRL because themselves have been hurt IRL and need to feel better about it. Like many other said, it's not because some retards try to put you don't that nobody supports your work; people are much more reluctant actually thanking you for great things so it usually ends up in them not talking/posting at all. If anything you're taking the troll bait a bit too much, that kind of defensive personality is exactly what they're after because they know you'll always reply.


As far as I can tell you, do what you want. Sure, everyone says it, wah wah wah. But seriously. Can you really imagine spend a portion of your life doing something you don't like? Life is short, you can't just go around and say "the next year will be better" because you're the only one who can change things. Don't like your job? Find a new one. Trouble with languages? Get a teacher. And yes, it might be painful at times and yes, it's never easy. But it's the price to pay to bask in what you love. Life isn't easy for a good reason, it wouldn't be rewarding at all. Some people have it easy because of some social standards (be it money or fame) but you have to realize that those people usually lack what's most important: a passion.

So all in all I can only say you're the only one who knows what's best for you.
#1 arb fan -- Raelcun is Nuclear backwards. Rekrul is Lurker backwards. Grobyc is Cyborg backwards. Eniram is Marine backwards.
floor exercise
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Canada5847 Posts
May 29 2009 14:14 GMT
#50
I live to ridiculize people
Elric
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United Kingdom1327 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-05-29 14:20:56
May 29 2009 14:18 GMT
#51
As everyone else has said, idiots on the internet are just nobodies. Fuck 'em.

You should definitely try learning Korean more. It's fun! Especially up to intermediate level as you pick up lots of basic but useful things quickly. It is sooooooooo satisfying actually using some new bit of Korean and then being understood. And non-Asian people speaking even basic conversational Korean get a tonne of admiration (great for your ego). If you need any advice on language courses in Seoul, fire me a PM.

If you have no concrete plans to return to in the UK, I suggest staying in Korea. Have you forgotten how shit the UK is? Think of the chavs , and the miserable employees, and the retarded transport system and the wtf taxes...

Also, reread snowbird's stuff. It's pretty frank but prob the best post of advice here.
KurtistheTurtle
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States1966 Posts
May 29 2009 14:28 GMT
#52
oh and for the food part I'm going through a kind of intense fitness regimen over the summer which involves monitoring/reducing my food intake, this is what I do and even though I've only been at it for a week I've already noticed results

drink a full glass of water 1/2 an hour before every meal, and when you eat take a long time to do it. Don't work on other things and concentrate on eating while you're eating. Take smaller portions, present them to yourself nicely, and go back for seconds. Stop when you feel 80%ish--where your hunger is sated but theres still room for more.

And most importantly, if you're hungry then eat something healthy as a snack. DO NOT starve yourself on purpose. You can indulge once a while.
“Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears."
Ragnorak
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Australia54 Posts
May 29 2009 15:03 GMT
#53
Count me as another of your silent fans, NeverGG. The work you do is amazing, and even more so because its a hobby rather than a profession. The sheer amount of consistently high quality photos you produce is inspiring.

That said, confidence is hard to find a lot of the time. Unfortunately there is no easy way around it either. It is all too easy to dismiss peoples praise of your work, and to take criticism too hard. For example, with your photos, I'll wager that you can look at any one of your photos and see something that you could have done better. So when someone compliments it, its easy to dismiss it because you can see what's wrong with it. Then when someone criticises it, it becomes just one more thing you've done wrong.

There are many ways to deal with it, but you are going to have to find the way that works for you. For me personally, when someone comments on something I've done, I will analyse it, see if it has merit. Note I don't care about whether the comment is positive or negative, I simply try to see if the comment has value or not. If it does have value, fantastic. Its either positive or negative. If its positive, awesome. If its negative, then fine, I've made a mistake somewhere along the line. This criticism will highlight it to me, and I can work on fixing the problem, or doing better next time.

The other thing I do is to make sure that I divorce my sense of self-worth from the work that I do. Just because I've made a mistake, or not done a perfect job, it does not reflect on my worth as a person. Perhaps the best quote I've heard on the issue is this one, from Eleanor Roosevelt: "No one can make you feel inferior without your permission."

But in the end, you are going to need to find your self confidence all by yourself. Friends can give advice, personal anecdotes, and a lot of support, but in the end, the solution has to come from inside you. I wish you the best of luck, and keep in mind that there are more people out there that appreciate your work that you realise.

Also: lilsusie, I wouldn't be too offended that she didn't come to you with this. I've been in these sorts of situations before, and I've shut myself off from my friends and people I care about. Its a bad idea and counter-productive, but it is very easy to do. A lot of people also find it easier to write down their problems, it can be easier to make sure you say what you actually mean. Its also useful in that you can see exactly what is bothering you, and start working through the list to remedy the situation. Combine these two ideas, and you end up with this blog
Wotans_Fire
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United Kingdom294 Posts
May 29 2009 15:42 GMT
#54
I would return home because from what I am reading is that you're not getting paid enough, I wouldn't accept it. I don't know if you have a photography education, but maybe that is a thing to do in the UK since they have many good schools for such.
"OMG this is pivotal!" ~ Tasteless "Indeed" ~ Artosis
emucxg
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Finland4559 Posts
May 29 2009 15:54 GMT
#55
On May 30 2009 00:42 Wotans_Fire wrote:
I would return home because from what I am reading is that you're not getting paid enough, I wouldn't accept it. I don't know if you have a photography education, but maybe that is a thing to do in the UK since they have many good schools for such.

I'm agree, money is always the problem...
Money is not everything, but without money, you can not do anything.
ZeroCartin
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Costa Rica2390 Posts
May 29 2009 16:12 GMT
#56
What i would evaluate is if this you are doing is really making you a better professional/really helping you out for the upcoming future. If its not, then Id definetely move, if it IS, then id just try to get as strong as possible, try to watch the stuff that usually motivated you in the first place, and try to get that inner power and sense of adventure out of you so you can stop worrying, and enjoy living what you are living now.

I hope you find the answer soon, and whatever it is, be sure to know that most, if not all of the TL community will back you up for ur decision. BE STRONG! :D
"My sister is on vacation in Costa Rica right now. I hope she stays a while because she's a miserable cunt." -pubbanana
chongu
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
Malaysia2599 Posts
May 29 2009 17:00 GMT
#57
First of all, i would like to thank you for all your contributions to the TL community. : ) and i also personally envy you and your work, to be able to go to S.Korea and to follow your dreams and passion, take such amazing pictures, meet progamer superstars and capture great moments with your camera and then share it with everyone on TL.

Hope you are able to rekindle your passion for starcraft, e-sports and most of all.... to be the best person you can be : ) So that when in the future when u look back, you'll have more sweet memories than you'll have bitter ones.

PS: Your hardships and sacrifices will not go forgotten by the community.
SC2 is to BW, what coke is to wine.
konadora *
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
Singapore66363 Posts
May 29 2009 17:03 GMT
#58
NeverGG please reply asap

you are scaring me
POGGERS
Gnojfatelob
Profile Joined April 2008
Belgium216 Posts
May 29 2009 17:08 GMT
#59
Is your real passion E-sports, or is it photography?? Thats the most important decision you have to make. If its E-sports then you should stay, but if your passion is photography then get out. You can practice that everywhere in the world.
Probably the best starcraft player in the world
Smorrie
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Netherlands2932 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-05-29 17:23:42
May 29 2009 17:21 GMT
#60
- stop scrubbin and quit any underpaid jobs you are doing
- i thought teaching english in korea makes enough money for a living?
- figure out how to make money of your photographing hobby (work for a specific site only, or sell your pictures you make, contact teams and see if you can get paid for doing a team shoot or whatever, etc).. your portfolio should be big and good enough by now
- i think i once read that you didn't have any time for yourself because it all goes into photographing... spend more time on yourself (nobody's paying you so you don't have any obligations anyways)
- learn to enjoy life
- figure out what you wanna do in the future (you have any kind of education?).. you can't keep on doing what you're doing now, unless you feel this is your calling and you can move up in all this and live a happy life and enjoy what you do

Next to all that, it seems you have some confidence issues which I doubt will go away by people here telling you that you shouldn't care, but you really should work on it. Truth is, I don't care about you and I don't think anyone else here really does (few exceptions) either. Since we don't really know you personally we can't really give you the advice you really need.I don't think you were looking for advice anyways but just had to let it out. Hope it helped!

Good luck, I'm sure you'll make the right decision.
It has a strong technique, but it lacks oo.
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